writing live

[OT]

Originally posted by phatcat
Summed up: can 99% perspiration = 100% inspiration

My answer is no.

Without the illusive instinct to pick (or drop) just the right word, you can puzzle over a poem forever and never make it great.

(although a bit of scrubbing can oft times make it quite presentable)

O.T.
stuff

[JUDO]

Originally posted by OT
(although a bit of scrubbing can oft times make it quite presentable)

Reminds me of what a trombone player I knew used to know would say about poorly-written music. "You can't polish a turd."

[OT]

Originally posted by JUDO
"You can't polish a turd."

And therein lies the rub.
Turds and fertilizer are of the same ilk.

O.T.

[smithpeter]

toe jam
the stuff
between tootsies
wiggled
a lubrucant
anti-friction
self salve

toe jamb
brow beating
in the night
some unknowh smarty pants
on drugs and good with math
making the night again

[smithpeter]

I can't go back, so need to say the poem before is about jazz

[karmadog]

some unknowh smarty pants
on drugs and good with math

Ornette Coleman

[Angeline]

If I weren't here or didn't have them
If not full of fear or didn't depend on
this and that to keep the daily shallow
routine of my modern mommy world

intact

I would send myself to another place
I would look into your tired eyes
I would put soft hands upon your face

to remind you

that in spite of lies and disconnects
or ugliness and disrespect to everything
that still seems left to hold close to your

heart

there are still a few here in the world
and among the stars who would
see inside who would take their warmth
who would take their light and give it all

to you.

[lickmyboot]

Originally posted by OT
And therein lies the rub.
Turds and fertilizer are of the same ilk.

O.T.

Yes, but from fertilizer grows the lovliest blooms.

[_Land]

We remove our masks
unashamed, for we are in
a hidden place where it is
safe to be our sacred selves

fear and doubt, no stigma
no room for sideward glances
looking straight, as our
inner being, is razed,
put too the flames

Aristotle views, displaying
as we look inward, intimate
softly touching, self created
wounds, internal bleeding

Our white robes, carried
like a white elephant
a gift unwanted, unneeded
hiding our fetters, cloaked
by our scrubbed exterior

staring at our reflective
eyelids, removing clouds
searching for the child
tucked in fetal position
protected, from storms

Seeking we find. internal
realms of peace and comfort
opening our eyes and hearts
against the back drop of a starlit sky

We awaken

[_Land]

After writing this live I removed the stanza with the white elephant gift in it, It is much better that way.........

Originally posted by _Land
We remove our masks
unashamed, for we are in
a hidden place where it is
safe to be our sacred selves

fear and doubt, no stigma
no room for sideward glances
looking straight, as our
inner being, is razed,
put too the flames

Aristotle views, displaying
as we look inward, intimate
softly touching, self created
wounds, internal bleeding

staring at our reflective
eyelids, removing clouds
searching for the child
tucked in fetal position
protected, from storms

Seeking we find. internal
realms of peace and comfort
opening our eyes and hearts
against the back drop of a starlit sky

We awaken

[littlekateyes]

Great poems

[Angeline]

Nice to see you back here again!

[OT]

muddle and slog
through boggy days
a week submerged in swamp

look up and despair
no rest
mountains loom ahead

surrounded by
buried by
ultimately overwhelmed by

crap

[smithpeter]

it was time we came to visit,
littlekateyes-did you make that AV at summer camp?
ot-your last piece is truly written live we thinks,
_Land-which is live and which memorex? nice work-
__________________

Peace to all.
For U.S. folk,
there be a vote soon.
Cancel disaster for that day.

[littlekateyes]

Originally posted by smithpeter
it was time we came to visit,
littlekateyes-did you make that AV at summer camp?

No, but thank you.

Angeline thank you, I come and lurk daily. I am not good at writing poems just yet.

[OT]

Originally posted by smithpeter
ot-your last piece is truly written live we thinks

some rules ought to be broken
while others not so much
good are constraints that comfort
that provide an excuse
or a crutch

energy and
tilting
saved
for dragons

[_Land]

Thanks SP, am glad you enjoyed it

Originally posted by smithpeter
it was time we came to visit,
littlekateyes-did you make that AV at summer camp?
ot-your last piece is truly written live we thinks,
_Land-which is live and which memorex? nice work-
__________________

Peace to all.
For U.S. folk,
there be a vote soon.
Cancel disaster for that day.

[littlekateyes]

You and I

I look into my soul when I see you.
I see you struggle, I struggle too.
When you cry, I cry inside
When you reach out, I am there
I will always be there

Do not ever feel lonely
You might be alone,
You will never lonely
For I am inside your heart
To always hold you.






I know this is not in the right format and all that, but I just wanted to get this down. Hope there is not any misspelled words.
Kat

[_Land]

Kat, this is very nice....... No reason not to post your poems here....... sometimes at this place or another i will post a poem and ask for a critique, and workshop my poem to make it as good as i possibly can


I like this Thanks for sharing it!

Originally posted by littlekateyes
You and I

I look into my soul when I see you.
I see you struggle, I struggle too.
When you cry, I cry inside
When you reach out, I am there
I will always be there

Do not ever feel lonely
You might be alone,
You will never lonely
For I am inside your heart
To always hold you.






I know this is not in the right format and all that, but I just wanted to get this down. Hope there is not any misspelled words.
Kat

[phatcat]

lurk

[littlekateyes]

Thank you land. I normally just lurk. I love all of the poems here.

[karmadog]

muddle and slog
through boggy days
a week submerged in swamp

look up and despair
no rest
mountains loom ahead

surrounded by
buried by
ultimately overwhelmed by

crap

oh man. too real.

good are constraints that comfort
that provide an excuse
or a crutch

And again

[OT]

hurry up
without huddle

unnecessary roughness
going deep
over the middle

protection
in the pocket

sacked without
protection

[littlekateyes]

Insight


Inside your soul
I find a destiny
A truth
A heart

Look inside my soul
You will find beauty
Honesty
Compassion

We too are made for one
With out the other
We would just be alone


Kat

[phoriner]

How do I describe an angel - oh, for the right words to say;
'Cause when that girl does love me, Lord, she takes my breath away.
I love to hold her in the morning, and she'll be with me tonight;
Time just passes much too quickly, as the darkness fades into light...

She could fly into the clouds - hide at the bottom of the sea;
Run to the ends of this universe - but she'll never shake me...

Another day on the horizon, and she's lyin' next to me;
I'd give her anything in this whole, wide world - she taught me how to be.
Hasn't always been that easy - known my share of pain and sorrow;
She says she loves me, and I believe it, as we walk in a new tomorrow...

She could fly into the clouds - hide at the bottom of the sea;
Run to the end of this universe - but she'll never shake me...
...no; she'll never shake me...