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Old 07-03-2018, 11:00 PM   #576
champagne1982
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Cold Toes In July

You haven't curled my toes
in all these past days,
I lie wakeful and chilled
knowing that if I add another
blanket then I will wake
too soon and uncomfortably
kicking at heaviness laid
across my feet. I need
my blood stirred and set
in motion with passion
and attention paid.
Make my toes curl, I miss you.
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Old 07-04-2018, 09:28 PM   #577
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I shake my head, because
why?
you lose the nature of what such play teaches
beyond the violence
beyond the nature of the play
it teaches so much more you stupid fucks,
you ignorant stupid
social constructionist psychopaths

it teaches the nature of good and evil, teaches
the variance within the human condition
they get to act out
the fundamental nature of who and what we can be
along the spectrums of good and evil
because you can not
deny we have the capability to express
good and evil
and this is myt core belief
if you remove the barriers
and layers from men and their biology
you take away their identity
and they do not understand the
nature of violent dichotomy
that it has dual uses to protect
as well as injure

then they will eventually experiment as adults
and burn your society to the fucking ground
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Old 08-19-2018, 09:57 PM   #578
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My son called me Tod today
experimenting a little outside
of the everyday
I told him he was being rude
that it was disrespectful....

He immediately asked
why?
why is that disrespectful,
and so trying to understand things
myself I was compelled to answer
so I rolled back my memories seeking
something that had been taught to me
or something that resembled a reason
all I could find back there...

Respect your elders was smashed
into my teeth by fists
fear confused as respect
strength and might as competence
yet still the permeation
was always branded into my flesh
taught unequivocally as the right
of the mighty to dominate the small

Funny how a simple why
that demands a thoughtful answer
can uncover that I didn’t know....

and so I set about reasoning out
why
father
mother
Mom
Dad
we’re terms of respect
and
why I might be deserving of his respect

I looked down at him
amused at my own grasping for an answer

I asked him
are you able to earn money to pay your way?
Are you able to pick up and move tonnnes of
product in a never ending sea of work
breaking your body on the rocks of
responsibility
to the family
to ensure they can eat
are you able to awake at 4am drive to work
for upwards of 18-20hours a day
do it seven days a week?

are you yet able to comprehend
a tax return
a litany of responsibilities
necessary to ensure your own survival?

He answered no
but I was not smug
nor condescending
my reply

We are not yet equal as adults or as men
But the day you are
you may call me whatever you want
But for now
dad is the correct terminology
and not because I beat it into your flesh
so you never forget

But because you understand that
you have a goal to strive toward
in the becoming of a better man

the hope
that you are my better
rather than my equal
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Old 08-20-2018, 08:23 AM   #579
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The apples kiss shadows
Between your thighs,
Flowers erupt in the moonlight,
My lips fall, they kiss low-
Finding yours, love awakened in the night.
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They would come with their promises, words, oaths and substance.
I would stand by the doorway and stare straight into distance.
I make my house and mop the veranda, the bowers smell fresh and lively....
With the extended wait, the noises feel like music, with the usual clatter, their children and men,
everybody look again into the future.
I try, but never fit in, their worlds, their vision, I am sure is beyond my deserving.
But when they leave, I am left to make my house and mop the veranda, clean dishes and replant my flowers.
I try, but oh well! Did I say, that my heart is the house and they make my daily spoon of hope.
But every night I am back to the sky and my dreams, for reality is when they leave.


Darling, love finds its horses in the strangest of avenues. You think you remember its prance and the gallop, think again, well, for the earth is no longer the same color.
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Old 09-05-2018, 07:45 AM   #580
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“The most beautiful things are those that madness prompts and reason writes.”
—Andre Gide

I try to understand
the shifting moments of insanity
that drift between waking and sleep

daylights final gaze
chases light into the darkest
reaches
fragmented pieces of me

dip the nib into the inkwell
of humanity
scratch the thoughts
onto crumbling pages
a fleck of light within the dark
a sound in the silence

a gasp
a curve flashes
glimpses of desire
of breath held plunging into
soft
into wet
into the suffered longing
of collapsed willpower
nails rake flesh
a mind breaks into death
followed by a reemergence of tangents
circles and hard lines
intersecting
tearing apart
when you can no longer hold onto
the crash
the shuddered sighs of taut muscles
released from a crushing tension

when the blood pounds
a booming sound of pressure
lesson learnt
of skin and decadence

it flips
to pain
bones cracking
fists and feet
the feel of teeth beneath
my knuckles
the feel of ribs under foot
scars turned mementos
lessons scribed beneath the layers
of veneered smiles
clawing
behind the insanity of the day to day
we pay for the sins of our parents
in the flesh
and speak gently into the night
about pain
emotional trauma
physical wounds
trying to explain away the difference
when inside it hurts the same

I write to try and piece together
the jigsaw puzzles of how I think
if I think therefore I am
what exactly am I
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Old 09-09-2018, 04:01 PM   #581
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Somewhere sits a man
chairing his ego
rolling over those that are disenchanted
with his censorship
his despotic moral high grounding
his unearned morality

sitting there
able to censor with a clear conscience
because rides atop his compassion
for the panicked
the downtrodden
the weak and vulnerable
able to exorcise the demons
to their upset feelings

blaring out his tolerance
his ability to be fair and even handed
claiming his vision is driven
by the desire to protect

not to protect his own power
his own weaknesses
his own injustice
no
that’s too honest
he hides behind his shroud of virtue
speaking from a place of deep
compassion for the people
he needs protect

just like
Stalin and Lennon
Like
Hitler

In all their socialistic glee
they hide their envy
their shortcomings and weaknesses
their resentment at it all
behind the guile
of someone else
enforcing their own will
on behalf of ego
on behalf of sensorship
on behalf of themselves

all the while able to smile
at the hegemonic control they have
adhere
or perish your thoughts
I do it for love he proclaims
smiling the smile of a Cheshire

Grinding freedom beneath
Be-spoked wheels
and crushing all that opposes
his own sense
political correctness

What a cunt
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Old 09-10-2018, 07:26 AM   #582
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beautifully written! there was only one line that stumped me (if you could be so kind as to interpret)
"at the hegemonic control they have adhere"
otherwise, i kept up thru the whole piece! thoroughly enjoyable.
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Old 12-21-2018, 02:55 PM   #583
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Hormonal Bio-Chemistry (A Pituitary Spasm)

Shudders ripple across your shoulders and down to be felt
lower still on my skin and inward, a visceral tightening
that pushes layers of wetness against exploring fingers
questing for sensation, snaking upward and imprinting
deeply on flesh attuned to this touch. A voice sighing
a melody of promise to neurons splayed out and questing
across the chasm of synapse to spark a signal lasered
through a vacuum, until response glazes eyes, opens lips
and quivers belly because a chemical reaction is explained
by the omission of a single electron breaking a covalent bond
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Old 12-29-2018, 01:17 AM   #584
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https://youtu.be/4PDelnJlwK4
https://youtu.be/WyKGv7zjMs8

Sigh,

And so again I try to explain
to my son's the way it used to be vs the way it is now
And how it may come full circle
chaperones
pence rules
a mockery of freedom and liberty
where every one is punished
for the crimes of the few

Me too# cries the male rape accusation survivor
who's reputation has been dragged through
the kangaroo court
anecdotal reputation destruction
has always been the clear cut tactic
of women to vent their aggressions
The recourse is far further reaching
than a masculine dust up
where two men solve their aggression
issues
as long as it remains two men
resolving a grievance
it's clean and efficient
more often than not cementing in each other
an individual that will
fight for what they believe in
making them worthy of
respect even if its grudging,

Techhnology connects every thing now
one accusation
will tear your life to pieces
every search history
will tar you with the brush of suspicion

I look on in abject horror
at the train crash society is becoming
And sometimes think
Islam has it right....
How fucked up is that!
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Old 12-29-2018, 04:44 AM   #585
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beautifully written!
Say more, please.
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Old 12-31-2018, 09:03 PM   #586
annaswirls
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I imagine you were the lover
of my lover, years ago
and before I met him
you shared a name, an avatar
you shared the lines I remember
what were they?
what were they?
when you were lovers
you must have been hiding
from other lovers before
and other lovers before
but everyone knew,
everyone always knew
there was no hiding his style
his lust
his genius
didn't matter the muse
it was always the color yellow
the upper peninsula
and 15 years 15 years later
"smithpeter is offline"
god girl, I feel like we have shared a lover
and that I was never jealous
how could we not take our turn?
how could I not love what he loved
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Old 01-01-2019, 10:22 PM   #587
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Bermuda

Her whispered words were raw. Slick sex,
delivered as properly verbal
as a cloth napkin

neatly folded and laid in one's lap.
I think it was how she spread that linen,
carefully tucking it

just quite so
around my obvious interest,
was why, after the tiramisu

and coffee were served, I lightly tapped
her wrist and left
my room number written on an envelope.

I bussed my own dishes that night
and neglected to call my wife,
citing meetings that so often run too long.

.
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Old 01-02-2019, 10:54 PM   #588
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No.



I am not
looking at your legs.

It's absolutely your hips, babe,
round as a ripe apple,
that I am paying attention to

instead of traffic
or our CEO's speech
or even the stock market
crawling under a rock,
taking my net worth with it.


That's probably my genes
telling me Oh yeah, doesn't
SHE look fertile but

that's at a level I don't pick up on
and I'm just hoping you'll find my smile
to be both appealing and sincere
and we can get some fancy kind of coffee
together and just talk.


Because, yes, of course I want to
you know
but ultimately, I'd just like to find

someone I can show my scars to, someone
emotionally colorblind.
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Old 01-17-2019, 03:31 PM   #589
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Lol, and I’ve always known
deep in my bones
in the places where
articulation is far from the surface
in the floating darkness
of what we are
evolutionarily
biologically

women fuck the conquerors
men build civilisations
and women build within the children
with the ideas to further
the culture of that civilisation

and so we break down what that means
when war comes to you door
and the men fail

the women simply move on
to the men with more
Testosterone
with more drive to protect

and so below in the places
that we like to lie about
there is a need for men to
be dominant
and a need for women to be submissive

biology says fuck your equality
and put on a burka
while you suck the new mans seed
and watch what your former men built
burn to the ground
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Old 01-25-2019, 08:25 AM   #590
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shattered lines of ambiguity crystallise
in the pin prick holes that superimpose
the speckled light on the weight we bare

obscura inverted images
crackle with shadows
a shutter clicks a still shot
holds a moment of a world
we share seen from
behind eyes that
couldn’t comprehend inverted angles

the sky weeps
a cold drift of snow
it tastes of frozen sunshine

beauty beheld
in the shards of
cut razor bladed lines
droplets bloom
red flowers on white

shadows form on the outskirts of sanity
but it was never because I couldn’t express
what I felt
but because you believed
what you thought was best for me
through your own ideological eyes
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Old 02-02-2019, 10:31 PM   #591
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Watching the snowflakes fall and wondering.
Wondering when the buds burgeon and bloom
will I walk without pain again amongst the scents of
lilac and honeysuckle drifting on the breeze.
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Blessed are the cracked for it is they that let in the light
They say a smile is a gift which is free to the giver and precious to the recipient.
But giving the finger is free, too, and I find it more personal and sincere.
If at first you don't succeed....skydiving is not for you ....
If you don't pay your exorcist .... do you get repossessed?
I shall always decide not to decide, unless of course I decide to change my mind.
....But I, being poor, have only my dreams, I have spread my dreams under your feet,Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.......
Nil Caborundum illigitimi
Sestina slut
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Old 02-18-2019, 02:19 AM   #592
Neonurotic
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Winter has me tucked in
I haven't left the house in a week
other then to dump trash or check mail
My ass has wore out a spot on the sofa
because streaming Netflix and Hulu
keeps me a red-eyed zombie
fueled by espresso and soup
instead of eating braaainsss

One more, one more episode
to go before I sleep
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Old 02-18-2019, 02:21 PM   #593
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Neonurotic View Post
Winter has me tucked in
I haven't left the house in a week
other then to dump trash or check mail
My ass has wore out a spot on the sofa
because streaming Netflix and Hulu
keeps me a red-eyed zombie
fueled by espresso and soup
instead of eating braaainsss

One more, one more episode
to go before I sleep
I have an app that shows where members of my family are at any given time. I have been locked in at "The Forsaken Ice Planet" for longer than a week I fear.

A Wind Feel Of Forty Below

Such a thing, to be here -
an oxygen-rich
version of Mars
outside and a little
to the north.
Right in the centre of a polar
vortex, spinning it's way
around the globe
On an unusual
latitude to bring
numbness over
a landscape usually
softened with green
and warmth.
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Old 02-20-2019, 02:45 AM   #594
Neonurotic
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Quote:
Originally Posted by champagne1982 View Post
I have an app that shows where members of my family are at any given time. I have been locked in at "The Forsaken Ice Planet" for longer than a week I fear.

A Wind Feel Of Forty Below

Such a thing, to be here -
an oxygen-rich
version of Mars
outside and a little
to the north.
Right in the centre of a polar
vortex, spinning it's way
around the globe
On an unusual
latitude to bring
numbness over
a landscape usually
softened with green
and warmth.
Wish I could say that I was watching something worthwhile, but. Not.



A robin and the lady next door
commenting on tulips
lured me into a false sense of spring
Blue ice on the sidewalk
and an empty bag of snow melt
says both birds are unequivocally,
two bats in the same belfry.
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Old 03-28-2019, 12:22 AM   #595
4degrees
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Seasons
Reasons to return
Maybe re-learn but perhaps
Only happen chance
Something in the leaves,
Deep greens hiding away
My attraction is rivaled; winter gray
Feels something like boney arms
Clutching at me
Tightly, creaking, numbing
Me into a dream
I had began to say how
Passion always returns to the scene
Let me spin you in the silk
That sticks until the last breath
Rushing back in time, spinning
And going no where.
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Old 04-30-2019, 03:57 AM   #596
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I've seen you crush the sheets
until your fingers turned white
you shook
a rhythm that the try so hard
to encapsulate in the tango

bodies rammed together
syncopated rhythms
that we fall into
contour to
devour the sounds in movement
we drip moving
as we breathe each others
desire to
wrap around the music
to delve into naked sounds
striving to crescendo
you fall against
my chest
panting
laughing breathlessly
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Old 04-30-2019, 09:35 PM   #597
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tears drip from eyes hardened by abuse

bones snapped like the twigs
of a sapling in a hurricane
that now grows bent by the weight
it survived

the empty pit of worthless
nothing organised and conspired by
the vengeful and unleashed on the
too tiny to fight back in any meaningful way

fleeing the knuckles
the jug cord
the steel of a belt
the tip of a boot

changing school after school
the down the nose stares
because I was that "kid"
where hand-me downs came from the salvation army
and showering under a garden hose
hand washing clothes in the river
couldn't wring out the stench of poverty

and I let them know how twisted we were
by teaching them snippets of the pain
I woke to

the lack of control
because watching
seeing
those that you love left as bleeding
broken rubble much like you'd see after a hurricane
breaks things inside
leaves scars on the landscape
that heal thicker a reminder of
the driving rain and howling wind that crashed over you

over time I forgot how to cry
even pain was taken through hissed teeth and violent outburst
because anger channels the sadness
to get it out

her fingers wrapped around mine
the smell of blood in the air
her tiny lungs filled for the first time
and she screamed
fear
outrage
as she was torn from
safety and thrust
into the life

my eyes
dripped
I sobbed like a child
beauty
rushed through me
like a hurricane
and my scars felt less of a burden
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Old 05-01-2019, 03:28 AM   #598
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I have been one acquainted with the spatula,
broad flat melted plastic tip, spattered in BPA

slathered in bacon grease as it lifts
the fried crispy strips of giving into processed hunger

acquainted with the buzz of manufactured orgasms
a pocket rocket, a lump of plastic in place of a real cock

I've gone out to ruin what love is supposed to be
in the multicoloured chunks of
Zoloft
Xanax
rohypnol
onto the pavement
to numb a heart that felt, that feels too much

its my job as a poet to know where in
lies the beauty of a moon reflected in
piss that runs warm down the gutter

my kiss screams insanity
it screams that God

is dead
and we killed him

in the charge of the light brigade
inhalation of mustard gas
in concentration camps and gulags
in the terrorist bomber that prays for his virgins

and why is one month called the cruellest
when we all bleed daily for the sins
of our fathers out mothers

and the best gamers drive
tanks through the city streets

and whose woods these are
….I wish we knew
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Old 06-29-2019, 07:13 PM   #599
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because there was nothing else to be done and no where else to turn
I lay belly down enshrouded in darkness to write
pins and needles tingling in my unruly fingers
squinting to find a place between the lines
shadows a tapestry of understanding drifting between
cognizant and illusion

honesty sticks to my throat like honey
sweet and thick with the richness
of a million hours of unacknowledged back breaking effort

sorrow never sounded so beautiful as the buzz of broken wings
despondent and still fluttering
still trying under the moonlight

*
*
*

how can I tell her
the sky no longer holds
constellations of our dreams
an afterimage of stars that float between
clouds and smog
ecohoes of a secret
whispered
made an art of pressing desiccated flowers
and revelling in their frozen disphoria

but
I am responsible
for the irresponsibility
of a lover

standing naked in the kitchen
a pulsing nerve
tearing the knuckle bone from
slow cooked pork steeped in thick gravy
it runs over my fingers
sloughing off
as the sunrise bleeds through the venitian blinds
and a question come unbidden
do you still love me?

and I find I’m more in love with
the art of loving
as I sup on the last greasy
scraps clinging to the knuckle
*
*
*
I dig in the pot of madness
leaving hunks of meat intact
so I can suck at the tibia
because the sweetest meat is closetst to the bone

Tell me what it’s like being human
able to stand beneath the sun
tell me what it’s like
even though I see
nothing else can be done
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Old 06-29-2019, 08:44 PM   #600
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Quote:
Originally Posted by todski28 View Post
beauty
rushed through me
like a hurricane
and my scars felt less of a burden
Quote:
because the sweetest meat is closest to the bone

Tell me what it’s like being human
able to stand beneath the sun
tell me what it’s like
*inhales the essence of poetry*

encapsulates so much
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