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I think that she is submissive, but thinks it may be weird to admit it
I do feel your pain. Being a dominant without a submissive feels just as pathetic and shameful as being a submissive without a dominant, especislly from within the confines of an existing relationship, and particularly so for men.
Sucks to be us. But, be careful not to let that pity party subsume your identity as a partner in your relationship. This kind of thing has a tendency to have a severe impact on marriages.