Dear X:

Dear Almost Client,

I understand that there was a problem with communication between your daughter and our call center. It happens. Cell phones are funny that way. However, we DID try to show you our price list before you and the half dozen people you had with you started pulling things out of the house for us to load. When we asked, you said that you didn't care how much it cost, so we went to town.
Twenty-five minutes later, you had almost a full truckload. When we came to you with the prices again, you FLIPPED because apparently, our call center told your daughter that it cost five dollars for a fifteen cubic truckload. Either she only heard what she wanted, or when the agent quoted her 'five thirty eight' for a truckload, she assumed they meant five dollars and thirty eight cents. When we attempted to explain, you went nuts, as did your husband. When you didn't want to negotiate for us to take even part of the load, we unloaded everything, as is our policy.
All of this was caused by a miscommunication. I understand that and I apologized profusely for that and that we weren't able to help you. Now...
1) I, personally, had NOTHING to do with the 'white devil' taking your lands, as a Native American. I think what happened to you people was a horrible thing, but yelling at me isn't going to change what happened.
2) 'My people' were too busy being imprisoned on a new continent in Australia to worry about taking land from YOUR people, so don't EVEN say that 'my people' did ANYTHING to your people.
3) Your argument that 'we' took 'your' land and that 'we still want you to pay for everything' is stupid. I want you to pay for the service that you requested, which includes all the loading of your crap that we did.
And no, we do NOT have separate price lists for the different ethnicities we encounter. If you were white, black, Russian, African, French, Peruvian, or Maori, we would have charged you the same thing. So, I suggest from here on out that you either do things yourself instead of relying on your daughter, or just deal with the situation instead of devolving into racist remarks that were unfounded and completely ridiculous. If you want to argue with someone, I pity you if that's the best line of argument you can come up with.
As much as I tried to help you, you went off the deep end and I hope you get fined for not getting rid of your stuff before the deadline.

Sincerely,

E23.
 
Dear Almost Client,

I understand that there was a problem with communication between your daughter and our call center. It happens. Cell phones are funny that way. However, we DID try to show you our price list before you and the half dozen people you had with you started pulling things out of the house for us to load. When we asked, you said that you didn't care how much it cost, so we went to town.
Twenty-five minutes later, you had almost a full truckload. When we came to you with the prices again, you FLIPPED because apparently, our call center told your daughter that it cost five dollars for a fifteen cubic truckload. Either she only heard what she wanted, or when the agent quoted her 'five thirty eight' for a truckload, she assumed they meant five dollars and thirty eight cents. When we attempted to explain, you went nuts, as did your husband. When you didn't want to negotiate for us to take even part of the load, we unloaded everything, as is our policy.
All of this was caused by a miscommunication. I understand that and I apologized profusely for that and that we weren't able to help you. Now...
1) I, personally, had NOTHING to do with the 'white devil' taking your lands, as a Native American. I think what happened to you people was a horrible thing, but yelling at me isn't going to change what happened.
2) 'My people' were too busy being imprisoned on a new continent in Australia to worry about taking land from YOUR people, so don't EVEN say that 'my people' did ANYTHING to your people.
3) Your argument that 'we' took 'your' land and that 'we still want you to pay for everything' is stupid. I want you to pay for the service that you requested, which includes all the loading of your crap that we did.
And no, we do NOT have separate price lists for the different ethnicities we encounter. If you were white, black, Russian, African, French, Peruvian, or Maori, we would have charged you the same thing. So, I suggest from here on out that you either do things yourself instead of relying on your daughter, or just deal with the situation instead of devolving into racist remarks that were unfounded and completely ridiculous. If you want to argue with someone, I pity you if that's the best line of argument you can come up with.
As much as I tried to help you, you went off the deep end and I hope you get fined for not getting rid of your stuff before the deadline.

Sincerely,

E23.

As a native, I apologize.

I promise, we don't all have that big of a chip on our shoulders (mine's only tiny).
 
* Hugs FtF * Don't let him get you.

* Hugs Edge * I know that kind of reasoning. Visiting the US I heard the same kind of story while visiting a museum. "I" did sell the black into slavery and were responsible for his current misery. I got him convinced that I was not that old. Then he changed to "my people". Sorry, guy, we germans have made a lot of stupid and wrong things in history, but slavery was no part of it. But I'm used to be held personally responsible for my people's deeds, especially the Nazis. No matter that my parents were born in the war and me long after.

Some people just need scapegoats. Point him in my direction need time...
 
As a native, I apologize.

I promise, we don't all have that big of a chip on our shoulders (mine's only tiny).

*hugs to cloudy* :D

Don't feel like you have to apologize because someone else is an idiot. Although, *I* have to apologize on behalf of men to my wife fairly often...
 
Dear neighbor

So now I am a trouble making scum and should not be allowed to live here? (Or so you said to those in the front office when you registered your complaint.)

Okay I can accept that. According to you and your ilk I am scum. Too bad for you I consider scum like me to be the ind of people who get things done.

Your complaints are numerous and varied in their content. They are also laughable.

You complained to the office because I had more Christmas lights up than you did. You told them I had only done this to make you look bad to your wife and children. (???)

You complained because I wasn't being neighborly. In other words you didn't like the fact I wouldn't allow you to borrow my gas grill for your parties. Nor would I allow you to borrow my tools or have your friends park in my parking spot. (I had their cars towed so I could get out and go to work. You wouldn't answer your damned door after your all night party.)

Then you complained about the state of my yard. You claimed it was filled with trash. Yes it was filled with trash, yours. (It's kind of easy to see this. #1 I don't drink Budweiser or Mexican Beer. I drink Tequila. #2 I don't have kids so I wouldn't have dirty diapers. #3 I don't have dogs, I have cats. Oh and I don't smoke Ciggies. I smoke Cigars.)

Now you complain because I have a bike parked in my parking area. You informed the Front Office that you don't care to live next to an anti-social long haired Biker. You also informed the tat my parking the bike there took up too much space. (??? You park two cars and then have your friends over. I can't park my bike and a car?)

The office informed me of all these complaints as they came in. The Biker thing was the breaking point though.

You have made a couple of small mistakes. The first was to think that I am a renter here as you are. I'm not I own my place. The second is to think that I am going to play nice. I don't.

My wife had convinced me to let her handle things in her usual diplomatic and polite way. That didn't work. You just thought that gave you power over her. When you insulted her though I got a bit angry. (You don't call my wife a Puta just because she didn't care to join in one of your loud parties.) Now it's my turn to play.


All of the well used diapers you and your wife have tossed into my yard for the past week have been collected into large black trash bags. The same for all of the shit your dogs as well as your friends dogs have deposited in my yard. The same I might add for all of the rest of the trash. This fills four large bags, which have been sitting in the warm sunshine for the past several days waiting for the trash guys. Guess where all of this will be deposited tonight? That's right, your patio.

Your loud parties? You know the local laws. They have to be quieted down by 2300. Anytime after that I hear your paries I will be calling in the local P.D. to deal with you. The same for the cars parked in the grass and in other peoples parking spots.

Your attempts to "borrow" my things will no longer be taken care of by me. The Police will be called in to retrieve my things.

Oh and keep your Yard Monkeys off my bike. They have no right or reason to be on it.

Cat
 
Dear neighbor

So now I am a trouble making scum and should not be allowed to live here? (Or so you said to those in the front office when you registered your complaint.)

Okay I can accept that. According to you and your ilk I am scum. Too bad for you I consider scum like me to be the ind of people who get things done.

Your complaints are numerous and varied in their content. They are also laughable.

You complained to the office because I had more Christmas lights up than you did. You told them I had only done this to make you look bad to your wife and children. (???)

You complained because I wasn't being neighborly. In other words you didn't like the fact I wouldn't allow you to borrow my gas grill for your parties. Nor would I allow you to borrow my tools or have your friends park in my parking spot. (I had their cars towed so I could get out and go to work. You wouldn't answer your damned door after your all night party.)

Then you complained about the state of my yard. You claimed it was filled with trash. Yes it was filled with trash, yours. (It's kind of easy to see this. #1 I don't drink Budweiser or Mexican Beer. I drink Tequila. #2 I don't have kids so I wouldn't have dirty diapers. #3 I don't have dogs, I have cats. Oh and I don't smoke Ciggies. I smoke Cigars.)

Now you complain because I have a bike parked in my parking area. You informed the Front Office that you don't care to live next to an anti-social long haired Biker. You also informed the tat my parking the bike there took up too much space. (??? You park two cars and then have your friends over. I can't park my bike and a car?)

The office informed me of all these complaints as they came in. The Biker thing was the breaking point though.

You have made a couple of small mistakes. The first was to think that I am a renter here as you are. I'm not I own my place. The second is to think that I am going to play nice. I don't.

My wife had convinced me to let her handle things in her usual diplomatic and polite way. That didn't work. You just thought that gave you power over her. When you insulted her though I got a bit angry. (You don't call my wife a Puta just because she didn't care to join in one of your loud parties.) Now it's my turn to play.


All of the well used diapers you and your wife have tossed into my yard for the past week have been collected into large black trash bags. The same for all of the shit your dogs as well as your friends dogs have deposited in my yard. The same I might add for all of the rest of the trash. This fills four large bags, which have been sitting in the warm sunshine for the past several days waiting for the trash guys. Guess where all of this will be deposited tonight? That's right, your patio.

Your loud parties? You know the local laws. They have to be quieted down by 2300. Anytime after that I hear your paries I will be calling in the local P.D. to deal with you. The same for the cars parked in the grass and in other peoples parking spots.

Your attempts to "borrow" my things will no longer be taken care of by me. The Police will be called in to retrieve my things.

Oh and keep your Yard Monkeys off my bike. They have no right or reason to be on it.

Cat

Go get 'em! :D

Dear my neighbor:

I'm glad for you, now that you're finally out of jail, and able to be with your kids, but you know...Just because your kids spend most of their free time over here (all three of them) doesn't mean that I'm your new best friend. I can barely tolerate your children.

At the tender ages of six and eight, they've already learned the lessons you've taught them well. All three of them are users: they flat out told me that the big attraction for them here is that my child has 1) an Xbox 360 in addition to a Playstation, and 2) in their words "lots more games and lots better games" than they have. If my son isn't playing video games when they come over, they pester the shit out of him to let them play. No more. A new rule goes into effect tomorrow - after finding about half of his 30+ games out of the cases and scattered all over his bedroom floor (when your kids were in there playing while mine watched tv in the other room), your children are no longer allowed to play his video games - period.

Back to the "friend" business:

No, I won't find drugs for you, so stop asking me.

No, I won't babysit your children while you work. You want to pay me the going rate, then fine, we can talk, but I will not watch your three little demons from hell for free - EVER. If one is sick (like today), then for fuck's sake, stay home with him. Newsflash: that's what moms do when one of their children is sick.

Stop calling me.

You don't realize it, but my closest friend lived about two doors away from you before you went to jail and then moved in with your parents currently. I've already gotten the scoop on you, and want absolutely nothing to do with you.

We aren't friends, get it?

Thank you,

Cloudy
 
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Dear Universe,

I want to write for a living! I want one of these two editors to pick up my book and offer me a three book deal. I want to write all the other books I currently have on the writing plan and I want to sell them all! I need enough money to live on. Please help me with this.

Sincerely,

M.
 
Dear British G'vment,

What have you got against us ciggie-smokers? You take so much tax from us that we fund half the National Health Service.

You've banned us from smoking at work or in any public building. Now you complain that we stand outside public houses littering the streets. You could get street cleaners paid from our taxes.

You suggest that we cost the National Health Service more than non-smokers. So what? We're paying you far more than non-smokers.

You allow us to import tax-paid cigarettes and tobacco from other European countries but then complain that we are avoiding tax and smuggling.

If we imported all our ciggies and stopped paying the massive taxes you impose - you'd be broke.

Fag-Ash
 
Dear British G'vment,

What have you got against us ciggie-smokers? You take so much tax from us that we fund half the National Health Service.

You've banned us from smoking at work or in any public building. Now you complain that we stand outside public houses littering the streets. You could get street cleaners paid from our taxes.

You suggest that we cost the National Health Service more than non-smokers. So what? We're paying you far more than non-smokers.

You allow us to import tax-paid cigarettes and tobacco from other European countries but then complain that we are avoiding tax and smuggling.

If we imported all our ciggies and stopped paying the massive taxes you impose - you'd be broke.

Fag-Ash

We have a smoking ban in place here too...but everyone just ignores it.
 
Dear Troubles:

To the girlfriend I've been with for five and a half years:

You'll never know how much I love you. Let's just put it this way: if I didn't love you, I would have walked away after the first seven months and certainly in Month 23, and many times since then.

To the former best friend who betrayed me (see above):

There is a part of me that can't stop caring for you and wishing you the happiest possible life. There is a part of me that cannot believe that you would take a confidence I told you in my deepest despair and immediately telling it to my girlfriend, becoming her best friend and totally severing relations with me. There is a part of me that lets you rule my life even though you haven't thought of me after that week from Hell ending in the betrayal and your wishing me to go to Hell right now, There's a part of me that really wants to forgive you, and there's a part of me that knows that's impossible because you will NEVER forgive me. There is a part of me that wonders what happened to you -- did having your first baby change you forever? There is a part of me that wants me to tell your husband to divorce you RIGHT NOW before you turn on him (or he cheats on you and you find out about it -- I don't know he will do that but I think you suspect he will) , giving you full alimony and child support but escaping before you destroy him like you did me. There is a part of me that is still infatuated with the woman you were -- bright, smart, funny, incredibly nice -- and hoping you still have those qualities (though you would only use them for your children). There is a part of me that hopes someday you will resume your career (with your kids' encouragement) and be the succcess you were before becoming pregnant. The rest of me feels inescapably sad.

To a couple of Deputy District Attorneys:

Why did you sell your souls to Satan and send two innocent people to prison, one of them to Death Row? Someday there will be laws passed to punish you for what you did.

To my depression:

You almost had me there several times. I don't know if you are going to win or not. I honestly don't.

To my obsessive-compulsive disorder:

"Thanks" and a huge raspberry for turning me into a porn addict, for making me freak out when the former friend sent a New Year's card to my girlfriend, for hating those District Attorneys, for making me too scared to improve my life. Extra credit for insomnia, fueling the depression, making me trust people I shouldn't trust, and turning me into a near-stalker of the people I really like.

To the first girlfriend, half a lifetime ago:

You are right, we wouldn't have lasted. You say now you will never let your daughter fall in love at the young age you did (twice). It will be incredibly hard for you to prevent that. But you did finally forgive me for loving you (or at least let it pass) and I know there are so many good qualities to you. Perhaps we can never be friends, but at least I know it really wasn't wrong to fall in love with you, even if I went about it the wrong way.

To the second girl I had a crush on, so many years ago:

You are an even nicer person now than you were in my fantasy image of you. But I don't know if we were too candid with each other when we talked in November. I haven't heard from you since then and I hope I haven't blown it all over again.

To the friends I have made:

God bless all of you in the portions you can take. And please don't let me throw it all away by carelessness.

To LadyCibelle, if you see this:

I know what you must think about me staying with a girlfriend who is the main source of my aggravation; Heaven knows you've told me enough. Actually not enough. I hope you get to feeling so much better now that you know where your troubles lie and can get treatment for them. I want you to feel good enough to get on my case again and at the same time tell me that your husband and your children are doing great too.

To all the people who have passed through my life and have faded away:

I regret losing every one of you, even the people I fought with. You all brought something to my life, and I thank every one of you for that.

To ... well ... someone:

Please let me forgive myself for my myriad mistakes and please let me never hurt anyone on purpose. You know how much I've tried to avoid that.

To God:

Please forgive me the many things I do. I hope you can see into my soul and find it a good one. I want it to be.
 
T,

The first daffodil bloomed today. I wanted you to have it. It's not fully opened yet, but it will be tomorrow morning. I watched it today. The whole day, I watched it change, and break free from it's tight green bud, to a fragile little yellow thing, to the slightly stronger bloom it is now. Tomorrow morning it will be vibrant in colour and shape. Graceful, just like you were.

I made it through another winter without you. I miss you so much, every day, all day.

S.

DaffodilforT.jpg
 
Dear X,

I know you won't believe it but I've been there.

And the people you admire are much like the people you deride. Intellectually lazy, incapable of original thought, unable to take responsibility for their actions.

Why do you think they slide between the two spheres of our existence with such ease? Because they are the same people.
 
To the girlfriend I've been with for five and a half years:

You'll never know how much I love you. Let's just put it this way: if I didn't love you, I would have walked away after the first seven months and certainly in Month 23, and many times since then.

To the former best friend who betrayed me (see above):

There is a part of me that can't stop caring for you and wishing you the happiest possible life. There is a part of me that cannot believe that you would take a confidence I told you in my deepest despair and immediately telling it to my girlfriend, becoming her best friend and totally severing relations with me. There is a part of me that lets you rule my life even though you haven't thought of me after that week from Hell ending in the betrayal and your wishing me to go to Hell right now, There's a part of me that really wants to forgive you, and there's a part of me that knows that's impossible because you will NEVER forgive me. There is a part of me that wonders what happened to you -- did having your first baby change you forever? There is a part of me that wants me to tell your husband to divorce you RIGHT NOW before you turn on him (or he cheats on you and you find out about it -- I don't know he will do that but I think you suspect he will) , giving you full alimony and child support but escaping before you destroy him like you did me. There is a part of me that is still infatuated with the woman you were -- bright, smart, funny, incredibly nice -- and hoping you still have those qualities (though you would only use them for your children). There is a part of me that hopes someday you will resume your career (with your kids' encouragement) and be the succcess you were before becoming pregnant. The rest of me feels inescapably sad.

To a couple of Deputy District Attorneys:

Why did you sell your souls to Satan and send two innocent people to prison, one of them to Death Row? Someday there will be laws passed to punish you for what you did.

To my depression:

You almost had me there several times. I don't know if you are going to win or not. I honestly don't.

To my obsessive-compulsive disorder:

"Thanks" and a huge raspberry for turning me into a porn addict, for making me freak out when the former friend sent a New Year's card to my girlfriend, for hating those District Attorneys, for making me too scared to improve my life. Extra credit for insomnia, fueling the depression, making me trust people I shouldn't trust, and turning me into a near-stalker of the people I really like.

To the first girlfriend, half a lifetime ago:

You are right, we wouldn't have lasted. You say now you will never let your daughter fall in love at the young age you did (twice). It will be incredibly hard for you to prevent that. But you did finally forgive me for loving you (or at least let it pass) and I know there are so many good qualities to you. Perhaps we can never be friends, but at least I know it really wasn't wrong to fall in love with you, even if I went about it the wrong way.

To the second girl I had a crush on, so many years ago:

You are an even nicer person now than you were in my fantasy image of you. But I don't know if we were too candid with each other when we talked in November. I haven't heard from you since then and I hope I haven't blown it all over again.

To the friends I have made:

God bless all of you in the portions you can take. And please don't let me throw it all away by carelessness.

To LadyCibelle, if you see this:

I know what you must think about me staying with a girlfriend who is the main source of my aggravation; Heaven knows you've told me enough. Actually not enough. I hope you get to feeling so much better now that you know where your troubles lie and can get treatment for them. I want you to feel good enough to get on my case again and at the same time tell me that your husband and your children are doing great too.

To all the people who have passed through my life and have faded away:

I regret losing every one of you, even the people I fought with. You all brought something to my life, and I thank every one of you for that.

To ... well ... someone:

Please let me forgive myself for my myriad mistakes and please let me never hurt anyone on purpose. You know how much I've tried to avoid that.

To God:

Please forgive me the many things I do. I hope you can see into my soul and find it a good one. I want it to be.

:rose:
 
Dear X,

It's been a few days since I've heard from you. I hope you are okay and that you weren't upset or thrown by anything I said in my last letter.

We both know I'm married, and we both know that, if given the chance, I would once again be unable to stay away from you. In some ways it's good that you live halfway across the world from me. In other ways...it tears me apart. The whole situation tears me apart.

In the years that I've been married I have found myself with passing attractions for other men...something I believe is completely normal but also something I've never really felt compelled to act upon. I don't know why this is different with you. I don't know you very well but I do know that this is different, and it's the first time I've ever felt something "real" for someone else since getting together with my husband almost eight years ago.

But I have to wonder. Is any of this real at all? You know that I'm lonely, I know that you've been treated very badly over the years. Is this one big illusion that we've created together because we're fulfilling a single, but desperate, need within each other, or is this something that could actually develop into love one day? I don't know. I just don't know.

I find my heart torn in two. Despite my loneliness I love my husband, and he IS doing what he can to make me feel less alone in this world. And when you get down to it none of this is fair to him, not just because I've developed feelings for someone else but because his not being there for me is not really his fault. He doesn't choose to work the hours he does and he doesn't choose the stress, and he is looking for another job that might not do this to us. I have a life with him, I'm continuing to build a life with him, I stand to lose so much if I were to drop it all and run away to you. But I can't stop thinking about you, wanting to see you, to hear your voice, to gaze into your loving eyes one more time. For the brief hours that I spent with you, you made me feel like I was the center of your world...something I haven't felt with my husband for a long, long time.

I hope some of this makes sense to you. I'm not really sure it makes any sense to me. But please write me, let me know you're okay.

Love,
Me
 
Dear X,

It's been a few days since I've heard from you. I hope you are okay and that you weren't upset or thrown by anything I said in my last letter.

We both know I'm married, and we both know that, if given the chance, I would once again be unable to stay away from you. In some ways it's good that you live halfway across the world from me. In other ways...it tears me apart. The whole situation tears me apart.

In the years that I've been married I have found myself with passing attractions for other men...something I believe is completely normal but also something I've never really felt compelled to act upon. I don't know why this is different with you. I don't know you very well but I do know that this is different, and it's the first time I've ever felt something "real" for someone else since getting together with my husband almost eight years ago.

But I have to wonder. Is any of this real at all? You know that I'm lonely, I know that you've been treated very badly over the years. Is this one big illusion that we've created together because we're fulfilling a single, but desperate, need within each other, or is this something that could actually develop into love one day? I don't know. I just don't know.

I find my heart torn in two. Despite my loneliness I love my husband, and he IS doing what he can to make me feel less alone in this world. And when you get down to it none of this is fair to him, not just because I've developed feelings for someone else but because his not being there for me is not really his fault. He doesn't choose to work the hours he does and he doesn't choose the stress, and he is looking for another job that might not do this to us. I have a life with him, I'm continuing to build a life with him, I stand to lose so much if I were to drop it all and run away to you. But I can't stop thinking about you, wanting to see you, to hear your voice, to gaze into your loving eyes one more time. For the brief hours that I spent with you, you made me feel like I was the center of your world...something I haven't felt with my husband for a long, long time.

I hope some of this makes sense to you. I'm not really sure it makes any sense to me. But please write me, let me know you're okay.

Love,
Me

:rose:
 
T,

The first daffodil bloomed today. I wanted you to have it. It's not fully opened yet, but it will be tomorrow morning. I watched it today. The whole day, I watched it change, and break free from it's tight green bud, to a fragile little yellow thing, to the slightly stronger bloom it is now. Tomorrow morning it will be vibrant in colour and shape. Graceful, just like you were.

I made it through another winter without you. I miss you so much, every day, all day.

S.

DaffodilforT.jpg

:rose:
 
Dear X:

I bet you aren't happy with my music & the bass setting on the subwoofer.
Tough shit, I am sick of listening to the rapcrap you have on.
I will NOT listen to it anymore during the day & WILL overpower yours.
80 heavy metal & a german band called Rammstien have awesome beats.
I am sick of banging on the floor at 11PM because I need to sleep.
I have called the office & haven't heard it loud at night since.
Guess I wasn't the only one complaining, but I may have been the crux.
You coming in at 3am & spiking the rap DIRECTLY under my bedroom was it.
As for the stero wars... go ahead & try.
the fella above me LIKES my music & hates yours so I will win...
I have lived here ALOT longer than you with no complaints.

I am sure my hard & fast playlist didn't amuse you at 9AM this morning.

From the bitch upstairs..
 
Dear X,

Surprised you when I called the cops, didn't it?

Don't think I'll hesitate to do it again, because I won't.

Cloudy
 
J,

I know that you are scared and gun shy. You have every right to be and I understand why you do I really do. But I am asking you to see me sitting here on the cliff with my hand held out to you... listen to what I am saying.... "Did you know... that you can fly... I can teach you.... I swear"

You are the keep of my dragonflies....

H:rose:
 
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