Ideas to amuse a girl

I like a friend and wanted to please her in any way but she was not interested, so after talking she finally said that she would accept and order me to do things that would please her during a week if I paid her a certain ammount of money but she would not have any obligation or limit in this trade, in the other hand if I didn't do something she orders me I would have to pay her a penalty fee, if I didn't do that the trade would end inmediately and she would still keep the initial ammount of money I gave her.

I like her so much that I accepted but some days have passed and she has only ordered me to make her a download and to send her a certain selfie. I know she is not into BDSM (I know she accepted mainly to get my money) but I also know she likes to humiliate people, she has a strong and demandant personality, any ideas of how I may amuse her?

Ok, I don't mean to be mean but I will be a little mean because I think you like that stuff.

What the fuck, dude?

What are you looking for here?

You're so desperate for humiliation you'll pay some chick who's clearly not a friend to do this stuff to you?

She took your money and laughed. She's clearly not going to make you do shit. If you think of it this way, maybe you can jerk off to this scenario.

If you really really want this, there are professional dommes out there you can give your money to and guarantee yourself the experience you have in your head. Just google. Or, you can google phone sex sites.

Your last post about being humiliated and camming and now this one make me think you're some lust filled horny net geek moment, trying to get someone to tell you to shove a q-tip up your urethra for free.

If you're really seeking assistance from some normal people who like a few kinky things then re-read what you wrote and see if you can ask in a more clear way.

cookiecat said:

Ok, I don't mean to be mean but I will be a little mean because I think you like that stuff.

What the fuck, dude?

What are you looking for here?

You're so desperate for humiliation you'll pay some chick who's clearly not a friend to do this stuff to you?

She took your money and laughed. She's clearly not going to make you do shit. If you think of it this way, maybe you can jerk off to this scenario.

If you really really want this, there are professional dommes out there you can give your money to and guarantee yourself the experience you have in your head. Just google. Or, you can google phone sex sites.

Your last post about being humiliated and camming and now this one make me think you're some lust filled horny net geek moment, trying to get someone to tell you to shove a q-tip up your urethra for free.

If you're really seeking assistance from some normal people who like a few kinky things then re-read what you wrote and see if you can ask in a more clear way.

Click to expand...

That was kinder than it deserved.

cookiecat said:

Ok, I don't mean to be mean but I will be a little mean because I think you like that stuff.

What the fuck, dude?

What are you looking for here?

You're so desperate for humiliation you'll pay some chick who's clearly not a friend to do this stuff to you?

She took your money and laughed. She's clearly not going to make you do shit. If you think of it this way, maybe you can jerk off to this scenario.

If you really really want this, there are professional dommes out there you can give your money to and guarantee yourself the experience you have in your head. Just google. Or, you can google phone sex sites.

Your last post about being humiliated and camming and now this one make me think you're some lust filled horny net geek moment, trying to get someone to tell you to shove a q-tip up your urethra for free.

If you're really seeking assistance from some normal people who like a few kinky things then re-read what you wrote and see if you can ask in a more clear way.

Click to expand...

It's not called "desperation for humilliation" it's called findom, and humilliation is not my favorite thing either, I simply want to please that girl, I didn't say that I only want ideas to be humilliated, I just said that that is something she may like, and I dont want girls to tell me to do sexual things as you suggested (in fact the question was directed to women and men even when I am straight).

I am not in a "horny geek moment" either, this is a question about a trade that I had to think nearly half month before to be sure that I am sure to accept (since it has finantial consecuences I had to be sure I wouldn't regret later), and I realized that would be interesting to give it a chance. And she IS a friend and we can keep our friendship without mixing it with these kind of games.

You wrote that as you were angry but I don't understand why, there is a lot of people who discriminate sexual orientation and diferent practices including BDSM, we are going to discriminate diferent practices (i.e. findom) in this comunity too?

The last post was mainly because I was curious and this post is about a situation I actually have and that I like, is't his site made for those things?. I thought I was going to find open minded people here.

OP, the biggest problem I see here is that you're pressuring someone into playing your kink. Instead of doing this to a person you say is a friend that isn't interested, I suggest you find someone that wants to do this with you and will tell you what they want. Anyone here giving you ideas will not be very helpful as 1. She's not into it and 2. We don't know her so we don't know what would be appropriate.

Please stop pestering her and find someone that wants to do this with you.

I tend to believe this is less about wanting ideas for how to go about your arrangement, but rather more about some sort of validation. Your OP was a bit vague, then you went on the defensive readily enough.

Perhaps a better explanation is required for you to obtain what you are looking for?

MeekMe said:

OP, the biggest problem I see here is that you're pressuring someone into playing your kink. Instead of doing this to a person you say is a friend that isn't interested, I suggest you find someone that wants to do this with you and will tell you what they want. Anyone here giving you ideas will not be very helpful as 1. She's not into it and 2. We don't know her so we don't know what would be appropriate.

Please stop pestering her and find someone that wants to do this with you.

Click to expand...

I only wanted to know if there was a person who had ideas of something that would please a girl, making downloads or helping with some works could be an example. I already enjoy giving her money (since I am into findom) and playing when we chat on WhatsApp that I "discover" that she only wants to use me and she treats me like that, actually giving her money makes it feel more real to me, of course our relation is not like that all the time, its only in certain moments when we feel like playing it, in other times we are just like normal best friends.

I know I said that she is not into BDSM, do you think that I should only pay a girl who is into that even after all I have just said? I saw it like as long as we both of us get what we want there is no problem on doing such deals.

super100p said:

It's not called "desperation for humilliation" it's called findom, and humilliation is not my favorite thing either, I simply want to please that girl, I didn't say that I only want ideas to be humilliated, I just said that that is something she may like, and I dont want girls to tell me to do sexual things as you suggested (in fact the question was directed to women and men even when I am straight).

I am not in a "horny geek moment" either, this is a question about a trade that I had to think nearly half month before to be sure that I am sure to accept (since it has finantial consecuences I had to be sure I wouldn't regret later), and I realized that would be interesting to give it a chance. And she IS a friend and we can keep our friendship without mixing it with these kind of games.

You wrote that as you were angry but I don't understand why, there is a lot of people who discriminate sexual orientation and diferent practices including BDSM, we are going to discriminate diferent practices (i.e. findom) in this comunity too?

The last post was mainly because I was curious and this post is about a situation I actually have and that I like, is't his site made for those things?. I thought I was going to find open minded people here.

Click to expand...

Hey - hi! Thanks for responding - I really appreciate that you did.

I'm not angry. More skeptical. But you came back and explained the situation a little more clearly and that is awesome!

I still have a couple of questions, though, I've read and re-read your post and don't see the answer.

Is fin-dom something you want to experience?

Or is it having this trade with a girl you like??

Ok, I re-read it a fourth time and you say

I simply want to please that girl

Click to expand...

but then you say

this is a question about a trade that I had to think nearly half month before to be sure that I am sure to accept (since it has finantial consecuences I had to be sure I wouldn't regret later), and I realized that would be interesting to give it a chance. And she IS a friend and we can keep our friendship without mixing it with these kind of games.

Click to expand...

That's where I get confused. She's your friend but you want it to be more than a friend? It's not a game but... it kind of is??? Is it about pleasing her or the trade?

Here is your original post:

I like a friend and wanted to please her in any way but she was not interested, so after talking she finally said that she would accept and order me to do things that would please her during a week if I paid her a certain ammount of money but she would not have any obligation or limit in this trade, in the other hand if I didn't do something she orders me I would have to pay her a penalty fee, if I didn't do that the trade would end inmediately and she would still keep the initial ammount of money I gave her.

I like her so much that I accepted but some days have passed and she has only ordered me to make her a download and to send her a certain selfie. I know she is not into BDSM (I know she accepted mainly to get my money) but I also know she likes to humiliate people, she has a strong and demandant personality, any ideas of how I may amuse her?

Click to expand...

So if I break it down, you have this girl who's a friend that you want to please IN ANY WAY but she said no.

The only way you could get her to agree to having you please her was to pay her.

In the next paragraph, you say you "like her so much that I accepted" -- but if you think about it... YOU forced this on her. She said no, you continued to ask her for this and she finally agreed IF YOU WOULD PAY HER.

You agree she did this to get your money. She really isn't interested in your half of this trade. She just wanted your money.

This doesn't really sound like a friendship.

Anyways - I could tell you this sounds really lopsided... but to answer your question, what could you do to amuse her? Stop thinking of what YOU like and think about what she likes. Send her a gift card for a pedicure or something from Macy's. Offer to clean out her car. Braid her hair. I don't know. I don't know her.

My guess is you want to do something like.... bend over and spread your ass cheeks and send her the pic?

What do you think???

Never mind. Man. I way over-thought this whole thing.

I just read your last post.

Not all of us are the same. Just figure out what she likes and get her that stuff.

Sorry about sounding angry. Not my intent. This was way easier than I made it.

Good luck.

super100p said:

I only wanted to know if there was a person who had ideas of something that would please a girl, making downloads or helping with some works could be an example. I already enjoy giving her money (since I am into findom) and playing when we chat on WhatsApp that I "discover" that she only wants to use me and she treats me like that, actually giving her money makes it feel more real to me, of course our relation is not like that all the time, its only in certain moments when we feel like playing it, in other times we are just like normal best friends.

Click to expand...

Sounds sad and more like you're using her. You need your kink to "feel real" so you found someone to reluctantly go along with it. You want ideas to please "a girl" not your friend. If you're friends shouldn't you know her well enough to figure it out?

I know I said that she is not into BDSM, do you think that I should only pay a girl who is into that even after all I have just said? I saw it like as long as we both of us get what we want there is no problem on doing such deals.

Click to expand...

Yeah, I really DO think you should find someone that actually wants to do this with you instead of getting someone to reluctantly "play" with the lure of money.

:shrugs: I think you should give your credit card to her and just let her have it. You keep paying that bill and feel good that you gave her things she wants without her actually having to interact with you.

Just.... *blinks*

jezzilee said:

Just.... *blinks*

Click to expand...

I'm all about over analyzing.

That's my fetish.

cookiecat said:

Hey - hi! Thanks for responding - I really appreciate that you did.

I'm not angry. More skeptical. But you came back and explained the situation a little more clearly and that is awesome!

I still have a couple of questions, though, I've read and re-read your post and don't see the answer.

Is fin-dom something you want to experience?

Or is it having this trade with a girl you like??

Ok, I re-read it a fourth time and you say but then you say

That's where I get confused. She's your friend but you want it to be more than a friend? It's not a game but... it kind of is??? Is it about pleasing her or the trade?

Here is your original post:



So if I break it down, you have this girl who's a friend that you want to please IN ANY WAY but she said no.

The only way you could get her to agree to having you please her was to pay her.

In the next paragraph, you say you "like her so much that I accepted" -- but if you think about it... YOU forced this on her. She said no, you continued to ask her for this and she finally agreed IF YOU WOULD PAY HER.

You agree she did this to get your money. She really isn't interested in your half of this trade. She just wanted your money.

This doesn't really sound like a friendship.

Anyways - I could tell you this sounds really lopsided... but to answer your question, what could you do to amuse her? Stop thinking of what YOU like and think about what she likes. Send her a gift card for a pedicure or something from Macy's. Offer to clean out her car. Braid her hair. I don't know. I don't know her.

My guess is you want to do something like.... bend over and spread your ass cheeks and send her the pic?

What do you think???

Click to expand...

Actually you gave me the kind of answers that I was looking for. I think I will ask her to pay for something that peases her as you said. Thanks for that.

About my relation with her I know it sounds complicated and that I didn't explained it like I should have, thats because I wanted to keep it as short as possible to avoid making it boring, if by any chance you are interested in such strange relation I will explain it.

We have been friends around five years now, I didn't like her from the start but one day we agreed via chat to have a kiss, I was looking forward to it but when we met and the moment arrived she refused, of course I didn't like that since I felt like she lied to me and we had a dispute for that that affected our friendship. After a while things calmed down and I discovered that when we agreed about the kiss I started to like her. She told me that she liked me too although only for periods and we even had a kiss. I guess I wanted to feel I have something else diferent that friendship with her so I decided to pay a limited ammount of money so she could have credit on her mobile, I am sure she didn't feel guilty accepting that since she knows that I enjoy it. After that we made a trade when she could give me any order she wanted or I would have to pay a penalty fee (she actually enjoyed giving orders), I enjoyed it and then I wanted something more "one sided" (more extreme), something that would benefit her more and benefit me less and after some talking we agreed to this although I admit she did it more interested in the money that in what I could do for her, I know and is ok to me. Our friendship is ok since we still spend time chatting like "normal" people and ask each other for advice or talk about so many topics that we like (like life, art, society, philosofy...), but when we feel like playing we chat about our trades and that is something I like because afterwards I find that reading that I am being used by her is a turn on and that is what I take back.

If you have any opinion about this I would be happy to read it, sorry if I commited some mistakes writting but english isn't my first language :/ .

MeekMe said:

Sounds sad and more like you're using her. You need your kink to "feel real" so you found someone to reluctantly go along with it. You want ideas to please "a girl" not your friend. If you're friends shouldn't you know her well enough to figure it out?



Yeah, I really DO think you should find someone that actually wants to do this with you instead of getting someone to reluctantly "play" with the lure of money.

:shrugs: I think you should give your credit card to her and just let her have it. You keep paying that bill and feel good that you gave her things she wants without her actually having to interact with you.

Click to expand...

You tell me about just looking for someone who wants to be giving orders or to just give her my credit card so she can enjoy and that sounds more like I am using her and it makes sense. Is dificult to find a girl who wants to have a slave in my city but I think you are right and I have only those two choices then. Thanks.

(p_-) I can't really tell anymore what it is that is happening here. You have a very complicated setup and the only thing I can think to say is that you should probably have a conversation with her about this and both of you lay out exactly what it is you're doing. Either she actually wants to do this with you, and in that case have fun. Or she's reluctant and in that case, it's probably not so fun for her. If she actually is into this then she'll tell you what she wants when she wants it. If you need more than that then you'll have to either tell her and hope she's actually interested and wants to do that, or find someone into it.

As for resources to finding someone else if it comes to that, they're out there. I don't know what city you're in, but findommes are plentiful from what I've seen. Your kink has some life ruining potential so I hope that you are aware of that and have limits for yourself. Do NOT give this friend your credit card, I was not suggesting that with any seriousness.

super100p said:

it's called findom

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Actually, it is not.

There are two versions of financial domination:

a) You use money to make someone do stuff that he or she wouldn't have done without it.
b) You take control over the money of someone else and make him or her do stuff to regain (partial) control.


Paying someone for the hope that the payment will please the receiver is not financial domination (maybe financial submission), but getting money for no reason is not financial domination, it's called luck.

______

I think I agree with the others here. What you're doing is so wrong it nearly equates to force. Attempted force maybe?

Desperation makes people do things we ordinarily wouldn't do. In your case it sounds like you're so desperate to have a relationship you're flailing after every pretty face you can find. And giving them the creeps while you do it. Not good and not even close to being someone's friend.

You need to stop and regroup.

If you need to pull out buzz words/phrases in order to justify your actions, you're missing the point. Living a lifestyle isn't about using words and phrases to model your actions after. It's about LIVING.

Go find a partner you like who also likes you. Once you do, you can START to talk about the things that make your life zing. If your partner is ok with it, experiment. If not, find a new partner or find other ways to energize your relationship in the direction you need it to go.

Remember, it's a relationship. Not a contest or a fight where someone has to win and the other lose.

super100p said:

I thought I was going to find open minded people here.

Click to expand...

On this site, maybe, but in this forum, no. Worse than a bunch of Yeshiva Students with their endless quibbling

D(.)(.)

Dollie------- I have a lot of member friends here and we order each other to do things all the time. It's just fun and kinky.

Send me lots of money and I'll order you to do all sorts of embarrasing things yet nothing that will harm you. Sex amuses me a lot.

cookiecat said:

Ok, I don't mean to be mean but I will be a little mean because I think you like that stuff.

What the fuck, dude?

What are you looking for here?

You're so desperate for humiliation you'll pay some chick who's clearly not a friend to do this stuff to you?

She took your money and laughed. She's clearly not going to make you do shit. If you think of it this way, maybe you can jerk off to this scenario.

If you really really want this, there are professional dommes out there you can give your money to and guarantee yourself the experience you have in your head. Just google. Or, you can google phone sex sites.

Your last post about being humiliated and camming and now this one make me think you're some lust filled horny net geek moment, trying to get someone to tell you to shove a q-tip up your urethra for free.

If you're really seeking assistance from some normal people who like a few kinky things then re-read what you wrote and see if you can ask in a more clear way.

Click to expand...

Makes a note to never piss off the Cookiecat.