For those who were or are involved with married people

"... involved with married people."

Just so I don't incur the venom of certain people here, this does not happen in a vacuum. Both sexes are missing something in their current relationship and this is what drives them to a relationship outside a marriage.

Sex may be one the the obvious things that is missing in these cases but, more often than not, it is intimacy --- or lack thereof.
 
We swap with another married couple. Now, way back when I was younger, I was seeing a married man (kind of suspected). But he was sexy as hell and showed me a thing or two. Ahhhh, the memories of that one!

No, I didn't feel guilty at the time, was having too much fun!

Tifani
 
I've never dated a married person who wasn't openly polyamorous with the full and happy consent of their partner. That said, when people are coupled, it can put the third at a serious disadvantage.

I've been in situations where I started to really like a woman, and then she drops the whole, "If you want to be with me you have to be with my husband too" thing out of the sky. Which can be seriously uncomfortable if you've never met the husband, really like the wife, and are suddenly under a lot of pressure to like some random guy who expects you to automatically want to date him just because you're both into the same lady. That's happened several times, and it's a bitch.

It can also happen that the couple has a problem between the two of them and decides to "close" the relationship, which leaves you dumped thanks to a dynamic you're not really a part of. That's not a great place to be.

I don't think I could date someone married again unless they have FANTASTIC communication and amazingly clear boundaries and an unbelievably stable relationship between the two of them. It's not fun to have a third party have veto power over your relationship, unless you're kinked that way.

Oh, and dating someone who's sneaking around and lying, whose spouse would be devastated to find out? Not a fucking chance, ever.
 
I recently was in a situation where I almost when out with a guy who was involved (or married, it was unclear), but I panicked out of it and cut all communication with him before it got to anything.
I think it's bad karma and I want none of it. Some things should be kept as fantasies...
 
Just so I don't incur the venom of certain people here, this does not happen in a vacuum. Both sexes are missing something in their current relationship and this is what drives them to a relationship outside a marriage.

Sex may be one the the obvious things that is missing in these cases but, more often than not, it is intimacy --- or lack thereof.

Generally speaking:

For women - lack of intimacy which is conflated with sex; lack of manliness or leadership from partner.

For men - lack of sex; lack of attraction; boredom or easy opportunity.

Not excuses, just explanations.
 
Just so I don't incur the venom of certain people here, this does not happen in a vacuum. Both sexes are missing something in their current relationship and this is what drives them to a relationship outside a marriage.

Sex may be one the the obvious things that is missing in these cases but, more often than not, it is intimacy --- or lack thereof.

Generally speaking:

For women - lack of intimacy which is conflated with sex; lack of manliness or leadership from partner.

For men - lack of sex; lack of attraction; boredom or easy opportunity.

Not excuses, just explanations.

With my wife it is a total lack of interest in sex or affection or intimacy or romance. It is very lonely living with a woman that is really not living with you.

Now I have a GF who is also married and her husband has no interest in sex, so we provide the missing ingredient for each other. We would like to get her husband and my wife to stay with each other and give us the freedom to provide our romance, affection, intimacy and sex to each other on a much, much more regular basis. But that is a fantasy that will never cum true.
 
Just so I don't incur the venom of certain people here, this does not happen in a vacuum. Both sexes are missing something in their current relationship and this is what drives them to a relationship outside a marriage.

Sex may be one the the obvious things that is missing in these cases but, more often than not, it is intimacy --- or lack thereof.

This attitude is pretty monogamist-centric. Some people genuinely love their partners and have a healthy sex life with them, and still want to pursue other relationships at the same time. In these cases it's necessary to have clear and honest agreements about this with your partners, rather than agreeing to be monogamous and then sneaking around.

If someone's missing something in their primary relationship and try to fill that hole by sneaking around with someone else, it's a pretty toxic thing for the original, primary relationship, and it's a pretty clear indicator that the new one will crumble too. You can't fix a relationship by lying to your partner and breaking your agreement to be monogamous, and it's not healthy to start a new relationship as a mode of escape from an unhappy or unfulfilling marriage.

My relationship agreements include lots of communication, honesty, and being able to openly date more than one person at the same time. It works for me. I wouldn't agree to be monogamous, because it's not what I want. The agreements I do make, I try to keep.

I just wanted to tell people, there are options beyond "being with only one person" and "lying and betraying the trust of someone you love." :rose:
 
Yes, once.
He told me up front that he was married, and wanted to have sex with me.
I was only 19, he was in his 30's, and looked like Brad Pitt.
The sex was awesome.
 
Yes, once.
He told me up front that he was married, and wanted to have sex with me.
I was only 19, he was in his 30's, and looked like Brad Pitt.
The sex was awesome.

Tiny, don't know about you but it felt great to know an older guy wanted me so badly. It boosted my confidence a lot, which wasn't great in my younger days

Tifani
 
No

Is/was it worth it? Apologies if there is already a thread on this subject.

It ruined many peoples life, I went sort of nuts when my wife had an affair with two different married men. To get sort of even I started fucking her divorced sister. She says this is not the way it should be. I am also sleeping in the same bed with both of them until Friday when she fly's back home. I think my wife thinks this is a very good outcome now.
She talked to a friend about bringing her husband out for a visit, I think she intends to fuck her husband when they come out her friend will probably do the same to me.
 
We had a threesome with a married woman, once...

We had a profile on an adult site looking for a threesome, and I sent this woman an e-mail asking if she would be interested.

She had other affairs going on, and was oddly shy about meeting. It took probably two years before everything fell into place. Also met her Husband, which was kind of awkward, before we actually had sex with her.

It was wonderful when it finally happened, would love to have her again.

She's divorced, and living with someone she was having an affair with previously. He is also divorced.

Would we have another fling with a married woman? Absolutely! There would be less chance of having messy attachments.

I'd dearly love to have a chance to do a full swap, but ~sigh~ that's not up to me. A fellow can always dream.
 
Before I became a married, I had a multi-year affair with a coworker. Those years were awesome. I had minimal guilt and stuff when it was happening buuuuut then her friend and I start dating and guess who had to explain to the new girlfriend we were hiding her affair? Toughest thing I've ever done. Now we are married. I wouldn't recommend it by any means.
 
I have dated married couples but is never see a married man if I do not have his wife's permission.
 
I've had relationships with married men. I knew none of them were going to leave their wives. The sex was amazing and I still have an emotional connection to one that will never go away. These men truly love their wives, they just also have loved me. And I was a willing participant. If any of their wives ever found out and confronted me, I'd never admit it. I know these men love their families but they are missing something I could give them. I also know I'm the only one they've cheated with (trusting a cheater?? Yes because I dated these men before the got married. They have no reason to lie to me..it's an odd dynamic).

I didn't seek out married men, nor do I do it anymore. But I don't regret it. Those are some good memories I have filed away and we reminisce occasionally but only via email.
 
I had a few fun trysts with a married woman last summer. It began with phone sex, as a taken man myself I had to sneak out of the house (explaining that I was going to get gas for the car). I pulled into the parking lot across the street from the gas station, pulling my rock hard cock out in broad daylight. I began telling her every last thing I would do to her sexy body. She had sent me a few naughty pictures, and hearing her voice crack as her clit hardened under her own delicate touch sent me over the edge.

We met only a few times, the first meeting so I could take some sexy pictures. She was my first MILF. And it was an experience I would never give up! Her tight ass, the assertive way she damn near dominated me, awakening my inner dom. The way she moaned as I slid my throbbing cock into her ass for her first time. Mmm! Unfortunately, it had to end when her husband became violent (not about me, he was just an asshole).

I still have a couple of her pics and videos though... :devil:
 
I used to have sex with my secretary at lunch break and at my house right after work. She had a kid with a guy and was living with him and was engaged. It went on for 8 months and they are now married. She was 8 years younger than me and it was the best sex ever. I'd do it again. I kind of fell for her, but she wouldn't leave the guy.
 
Only in group sex situations MFM or MMMFM, usually with the husband present. Then it is, of course, all about the sex.
 
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married

I've come to the conclusion it really is not worth the effort or the heart break.
Sometimes we fall for the wrong people. This is just the nature of the beast.
Once an emotional/sexual connection has been made it is very hard to let go.
Chalk it up to life experience. Live and learn. I don't know what else to say. :(
 
Yeah. My advice...stay away from married people. It will never work out.
 
Sometimes More Than Just the Sex

I didn't know it at the time as I was just 20 and she was 42, but the affair actually strengthened her marriage. We had a very hot and torrid affair for 6 plus months while he was stationed overseas. Yes, she needed and wanted the sex but looking back on it she also loved just to be held. When her husband returned from Nam she asked that we stop seeing each other and so we did, for a while. After about 4 weeks she called me and we began to meet again. There was a bit of sadness in the affair now, her husband had totally lost interest in sex.

We continued to see each other on a regular basis and her need to be held seemed to be even more important than before. The sex was still amazing, she was my mentor and coach....lessons that my wife now receives the benefits from. We stayed in touch via letters for another 5 or 6 years. During that time she confided in me that the affair saved her marriage. When her husband wouldn't touch her after his return she began to feel undesirable, unattractive and not wanted. She told me that when we resumed our affair she realized that she was still a desirable "woman", that the shunning on his part had nothing to do with her, it was the demons he was carrying. It strengthened her resolve - he was still a loving father, cared for her but could no longer engage in the physical act.

I phoned and spoke with about 10 years ago, she was 74 and still married to the same man....it was a bitter sweet conversation but I felt like maybe I had some part in that 50 + year marriage.
 
It's been a few years since this happened but I remember it like it was yesterday.. I didn't set out to actively meet a married woman for sex, it just happened. Met her on a social media site, lived about 30 min from me.

She was a bit older than me and I found it intriguing that after I had sent her a photo of me fully clothed, she had sent me message back that she wanted to see me out of my clothes.. in person!

I'm thinking " wow this doesn't happen everyday". I was a bit apprehensive about this for many reasons.

It was a hot summer day in July, I finally just said " what the hell?" I only wore the least amount of clothing as I figured they were only coming off anyway.

We met for coffee but it was becoming quite clear she had more than coffee in mind so we went back to her place, which was hot as hell inside as she had no A/C so it only felt natural to peel everything off.

The sex was mind blowing, the stuff she did with me I'll never forget for as long as I live. This only happened a couple of times. I felt a bit awkward having agreed to do it after the fact as this was something I wouldn't normally do.

I might have been invited back for further sessions but she became paranoid about the neighbours talking etc. So it ended.

Would I ever do such a thing again? I really don't know but it's not something I actively seek out.
 
It is all too possible for me to have potentially, gotten my chocolate in someone elses peanut butter.
 
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My experiences have been with women and men who were currently married and having "a bit on the side" without their spouses knowledge.

Worth it? From my perspective, definitely.
 
Does being romantically and sexually involved with someone with a girlfriend count?

If so, I have done this numerous times.

The sex was always worth it.

However; the partner/girlfriend finding out, was not.

I find it so very erotic how much more a man is willing to do when he isn't yours ;)

Also...the thrill of being caught... mmm.
 
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