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NOIRTRASH

NOIRTRASH

Literotica Guru
Joined
Aug 22, 2015
Posts
10,580
formerly FOR THE PUSSY PEOPLE.


FAREWELL MY LOVELY
by Raymond Chandler

It's the shuffled deck of 3-4 Chandler novellas, but different. The novellas are obvious but different where it matters.

It starts with Philip Marlowe looking for a missing man, and ends with him finding a dead woman. Betwixt and between are a major jewel heist and plenty of dead bodies. Even a hot redhead falls for Marlowe, and he's tempted, but remains Dudley Doright.

Cover your eyes, its fullas words like NIGGER and SHINE, and youll go blind.
 
The story collected 46,000 reads so far, 500 votes, but still no comments tho the favorites continue to pile up. weird.

The sequel is done, and I launched #3 I call EMPTY NEST CLUB. The Nest is for anonymous semen donors who make their donations to eager moms to be and go home or wherever. She doesn't want a husband, she has one. But he cant or wont or isn't there.
 
Looks like the story finishes at 49,000 reads with 600 votes. The score is 4 point zero something.

A year ago stories fell in the 5000-15000 read range. I prefer these stories but more readers like the other better. So I learned something about how to package LIT stories. I expect to submit its sequel today. And #3 is on the drawing board.

This is my 4th year posting stories at LIT. Prolly 150 stories total. I collected one red H, and one green E so far. After 4 years I conclude no LIT writer is able to articulate what they do. Moment ago I read a board post by an old fuck who cant get to the point. I persist in thinking there's a real method to the madness of writing, as there is with all arts. But no one at AH has a clue. Most writerly posts take two forms: DUH or FUCK OFF TROLL!

I bought EXQUISITE CORPSE by Poppy Z. Brite yesterday. It was on sale, 8 bucks less than normal. Its a homo serial killer frenzy. The predators are fags, and the victims are fags. Really grisly gore. Noir on steroids.
 
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My story sequel got approved.

Then I wrote an LW/MATURE tale about an older girl who goes to work for a flunky-monkey she owned before she got fired from her big box manager job. He got fired, too, and started his own business. She got fired and lost everything. Its noir and hard crime and serious cheating on her husband.
 
The story sequel is posted and doing okay. Lotsa favorites. No comments.

LADY VER inspired me to write a mature character and tale about her transition from China Mart to gangster moll. I titled the story, TRANNY DOLL. The woman is around 60 but its a Loving Wives cheating wife sewer stroker. I stole the idea from an old Hard Crime novel about a globalist tycoon and his young Girl Friday and slut wife. Mine involves a 30ish hit man, his 60ish asset manager (the old girl sets the kills up for the killer) and her sickly hubby. In the first installment she fucks one of the cops who questioned her about a shooting.
 
STALKING THE ANGEL by Robert Crais

I score it 4 stars tho its better than 4.

THE ROAD TO HELL IS PAVED BY NICE PEOPLE.

Without saying another word about it, its underage sex.

But generally speaking Elvis Cole and Joe Pike are hired to recover a priceless antiquity for a rich investment tycoon. The tycoon invented asshole. His wife is an alcoholic slut. And their teen daughter lies her ass off about everything. Elvis gets sucked in, and hell is in session. Doing the right thing and caring are not the same thing. Do your duty, and fuck being nice.

It starts slow but gathers speed. You wont like some of what it exposes, especially you care bears.
 
Okay, the new LW-Mature tale is done and 3000 words. I'll post it at the end of the week.
 
Tomorrow is payday, and I'm ordering the collected short stories of Truman Capote. He had a knack for horror and MIRIAM is the best. Miriam is a child ghost.

Capote lived across the street from Harper Lee, and they were companions in the early 60s. I believe Capote wrote TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD, and her latest effort was the original, before Capote did his magic.
 
I changed my mind about the books.

I ordered CROSS OF IRON by some ex Nazi, a HOW TO WRITE book by Ring Lardner, and LUCIOUS LESBIANS by someone.

Lardner wrote his writer book a long time ago. He said writers fall into distinct groups: DEEP THINKERS, DEEP DRINKERS, and BORN DRUGGISTS.
 
NOIRTRASH said:
STALKING THE ANGEL by Robert Crais

I score it 4 stars tho its better than 4.

THE ROAD TO HELL IS PAVED BY NICE PEOPLE.

Without saying another word about it, its underage sex.

But generally speaking Elvis Cole and Joe Pike are hired to recover a priceless antiquity for a rich investment tycoon. The tycoon invented asshole. His wife is an alcoholic slut. And their teen daughter lies her ass off about everything. Elvis gets sucked in, and hell is in session. Doing the right thing and caring are not the same thing. Do your duty, and fuck being nice.

It starts slow but gathers speed. You wont like some of what it exposes, especially you care bears.
Click to expand...

I thought the road to Hell was paved with good intentions. They should have paved it with gold like it is in Heaven, but then money in mass quantity like that is meaningless.... It becomes power which isn't really a form of currency... Just authority to dictate one's will or influence on someone else without sme form of personal consequence. I'm babbling, sue me.
 
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Kantarii said:
I thought the road to Hell was paved with good intentions. The should have paved it with gold like it is in Heaven, but then money in mass quantity like that is meaningless.... It becomes power which isn't really a form of currency... Just authority to dictate one's will or influence on someone else without sme form of personal consequence. I'm babbling, sue me.
Click to expand...

Have more coffee. :D
 
HOW TO WRITE SHORT STORIES
by Ring Lardner, 1924

Lardner was a newspaper, sports writer until discovered by Maxwell Perkins at Scribners. Perkins discovered all the big names of the 1920s and 1930s. Lardner was a humor writer. He died early of tuberculosis.

This isn't a how to write manual. Its a collection of 10 simple short stories with a preface that's a feast of misspellings, grammatical garbage, and more. So you wont learn how to write unless you wanna learn how to murder English and make readers laugh.

sample

However, for some reason another when you skin through the pages of high class periodicals, you don’t very often find them cluttered up with stories that was written by boys or gals who had win their phi beta skeleton keys at this or that story-writing college. In fact, the most of the successful authors of the short fiction of to-day never went to no kind of a college, or if they did, they studied piano tuning or the barber trade. They could of got just as far in what I call the literary game if they had of stayed home those four years and helped mother carry out the empty bottles. The answer is that you can’t find no school in operation up to date, whether it be a general institution of learning or a school that specializes in story writing, which can make a great author out of a born druggist.

Lardner, Ring. How to Write Short Stories - With Samples (Kindle Locations 27-33). Read Books Ltd.. Kindle Edition.
 
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The latest effort should go live tomorrow or Friday. Get your one-bombs ready.

Then I wanna do some Golden Girls romance. That is 60 something gals connecting with younger male employees, neighbors, relatives, acquaintances.
 
The latest effort is lying unconscious and bludgeoned in an LW alley. LW always strikes me as funny. I get the trauma it causes. But I like brawls.

I spent the whole day contemplating vaginal sex. In grad school I researched animal genitals. A vagina isn't genitals, its a place for sexual excitement to germinate. One such place, there are others. I'm always trying to get inside Mother Nature's head. I wanna excavate her philosophy and expose it so sex makes sense.

I spent the evening thinking about assassinations.
 
Time to think of a sequel for my highest scoring effort. Its held on to its score for a long while.
 
My newest story is beat up and crippled. The score is a new low.

But it did what I wanted it to do, and that makes it a Wright Brothers, Kitty Hawk success. Even if readers hate it. The old heroine kills her hot stud young lover, to keep her high pay job. Plus she cucks her crippled old husband.
 
NOIRTRASH said:
The latest effort should go live tomorrow or Friday. Get your one-bombs ready.

Then I wanna do some Golden Girls romance. That is 60 something gals connecting with younger male employees, neighbors, relatives, acquaintances.
Click to expand...

This one, I take it. https://www.literotica.com/s/no-one-calls-me-ma-barker. You're right, with 51 votes, it's registering a 1.00 rating. The question is why you bother. You must be consumed with frustration and hatred. Pitiful. No, I didn't read it. I just scanned it enough to see that it met all the hints you've been giving. There's no question you can write. The question is why you choose to be such a rotten human being and so consumed with malignancy--and so needy.
 
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I read it. It rates a solid 4++ in my assessment. I am not commenting on the author.

Plenty of good writers are obnoxious - it makes some, not all of them, interesting.
 
ishtat said:
I read it. It rates a solid 4++ in my assessment. I am not commenting on the author.

Plenty of good writers are obnoxious - it makes some, not all of them, interesting.
Click to expand...

Thank you for the kind words.
 
PUT THE CAT IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU DESCRIBE THE KITCHEN
by Jake Vander Ark

He's a tv writer, I think.

Its a short how to write manual that hits all the familiar points of good writing but isn't same-o, same-o.

Screenplays and tvplays and stage plays cant 'tell' stories. Stories must be shown thru action or dialogue. Learn more about writing screenplays and your writing will get better quick.

Adjectives exist for what people aren't familiar with. If it aint new under the Sun don't use adjectives to describe it.

Endings should be inevitable but unexpected. I call the process CONFOUNDING. Confounding happens when all the facts point to one outcome but other outcomes exist that use the same facts.

The manual is useful and free.
 
Finished the first draft of a Golden Girls tale.

She travels to a professional seminar at Capital City where she gets a little drunk and wants to act out a fantasy. She wants to be a hooker for a night, and snags a younger man attending the same seminar. She doesn't know him or even his name. They sleep together.

Weeks later, back home, her john transfers from wherever to her staff. Surprise, surprise. He had no idea, either. And soon enough he's her pimp. Her trial comes when her hubby is transferred to the Pentagon.
 
I added plenty of you people to my IGGY list, and I been doing the Happy Dance all fuggin day. I put PILOT on iggy a few years ago, and its been wonderful. I gave him 7 full years to post anything worth the candle, it never happened, and he went away. TEX joined him. SECOND CIRCLE is there, of course. BRAMBLEDUM has a ticket and will be there soon. Even GLYNNDAH is there. GLYNNDAH is asshead in tiny does, but it adds up like rat poison. I think LADY VER wants to go there.
 
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