Old 11-16-2017, 01:57 PM   #1
FirmYetGentle
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Why Chat Is Worse Than Before

I've been on chat for a few years now, and have to say it's undeniably just gotten a lot worse.

From what I gather, the following are the main problems:

a) It's a sausage-fest. The gender ratio has spiked dramatically towards males over the past few years to the point that females get bombarded with PMs non-stop and are turned off very quickly from ever returning. This is even worse in light of the rise of genderfakers which includes harassment against bi and lesbian females who don't appreciate getting duped by fake companions. It's also bad for males who get stuck between assuming the risk of encountering fake females and dealing with females who aren't willing to actually verify their gender.

b) Confusion among intentions. Different people show up with different interests. Some just want to talk and hang out, others want to connect more deeply, some want to roleplay, and others want to meet-up. Before traffic got so intense, this wasn't a problem since you could easily ask what people's intentions are. Now, things are so chaotic that you're expected to just be randomly compatible. Combined with the previous point about genderfakers, this gets even worse because people will insist that you put up with others not being the gender they portray themselves even if you're looking for something more than just writing a fantasy together in the moment.

This is something that could be easily fixed by simply giving people the option to declare their intentions before the chatroom actually shows on their screen. There would be tick-boxes that ask people what they're in the mood for, and depending on the boxes they tick, a light would show next to their name. Red could be for talking, yellow for connect, green for roleplay, and blue for meeting up.

c) Nonstop politics. Probably half of all conversations on chat are political which is an outright turnoff for the overwhelming majority of visitors. Some people find politics erotic, but most people don't. Heck, people in general don't want to deal with politics even when dealing with non-erotic hobbies. When dealing with erotic ones, they expect a superior comfort level which politics disrupts due to the nature of discussing rights and responsibilities.

d) Mockery of erotic intentions. This is probably one of the worst of all. A lot of people show up and declare what they're interested in. Then, others shame them for declaring their interests as if they're ridiculous for expecting to find erotic companions. This flat out hypocrisy discourages people from believing the room is what it advertises itself to be, so people become uncomfortable and leave. It's like you have Puritan trolls who are deliberately trying to dissuade others from staying around.

This especially applies with confusion among intentions in how different people have different erotic tastes. Some look for intense excitement. Others look for something smooth and sensual. Then, you have those who want an elaborately seductive surprise. People in these three groups often mock each other and it creates a very uncomfortable environment. Like I said before about a tick-box solution, this could also have a tick-box solution so people can show their interest before they join. Maybe a flame could represent those looking for intensity, a heart for those looking for smoothness, and a moon for those looking for seduction.

_____

There's a lot more I could say, but this is enough.
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Old 11-17-2017, 11:29 AM   #2
RudyGardet
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I am extremely new to chat (like just this week) and so far I have had more good (some great) experiences than bad, but I definitely see some of the negative stuff you mention. My immediate question is - is tech stuff ever addressed here, like does whoever runs LitChat ever make improvements? I ask because if not, then as wonderful as your suggestions are they sadly probably won't happen because it would probably require some major tweaking to the system.

However, I wonder if some of it could be partially addressed by some new room titles? The current ones are pretty specific, which I guess is great if you are only in to that one thing, but I see tons of people (myself included) bopping around many of the most populated rooms looking for something. Maybe the specific room names are too limiting? For example, I've really enjoyed some roleplaying, but I personally am not dedicated to anything specific - in fact what I really like so far is losing myself (and being someone else) is another person's fantasy.

Then yesterday I kind of accidentally stumbled into a wonderful chat/conversation where the other person told me her story. I assume that's the talk/chat you mean that's a little less intense - maybe create a dedicated to that and see who comes?

I haven't seen any politics yet but you are 100% right that it would be a massive turn off to me. Way to much of the wrong kind of passion - unless maybe your looking for a good angry roleplay or something!

Genderfaking is an interesting issue. I came in to this fully accepting that you can't really trust/verify the identity of the person you are talking to, and I guess I'm ok with that. Especially since RP seems to be my main thing, part of that for me acting, even when my character is my own gender. I come here because my IRL sex life is good but fairly vanilla, so any time I'm RPing it's usually not like I'm playing myself. And I'm totally fine with someone playing a gender role that isn't their own, although I'm not sure if I'd prefer they were honest or if I just intentionally remain ignorant to not spoil the fantasy. However it's probably a lot easier for me to say that because I'm a guy and in the clear majority here - most ladies visiting the chat probably aren't going to have too hard a time finding a guy to play with, but if they are looking for a real lady I could see how it might be discouraging.
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Old 11-22-2017, 04:15 PM   #3
txgent101
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I enjoy Lit chat

Have had some really good encounters on lit chat. I have found (to my surprise) that I am good at sexy cyber text chatting. In private chats of course. Generally have not had the problems spoken of here. I like to sprinkle my private chats with url image links to illustrate what I am talking about. The women I have talked with seem to like that.

I would like a feature that allows one to see the gender of people in the room. I realize that some will not list theirs, but I will assume they are males as default.

I wrote some thoughts elsewhere in Lit that may be helpful:
This has probably already covered, but (from a guy point of view):
• Don’t start a p.m. conversation that you are not willing to follow through on (presuming there is a compatibility). I.e., don’t just flake out.
• Please identify your gender in your profile; these days it can be difficult to suss out.
• Try to find out what the other person’s time zone is: frustrating to start a conversation that ends because one is in Europe and the other is in California. People do have to go to sleep sometimes.
• Sure guys, don’t send cock pictures unless and until you have gotten fairly well acquainted and it is part of the ‘us’ of the conversation. You wouldn’t whip out your cock in a bar when you first meet her would you?
• On the other hand: I have been surprised at how quickly some women want to get into down and dirty conversation.
• A picture is worth a thousand…you know. I like to incorporate relevant links or images into the conversation; makes it much more interesting. Not *just* pictures, but the right one at the right time is an upgrade. Cut and paste is easy.
• Please respond with *something*. My father had a saying about nonresponsive people: “They didn’t say yes, no, or go to hell”. A polite ‘No thank you’ is surely not hard to write.

And the 'Ignore' button can be quite useful!

Last edited by txgent101 : 11-22-2017 at 04:22 PM.
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Old 11-23-2017, 04:11 PM   #4
Mike_KHB
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Great post. I second all points.
(C) and (D) are particularly off-putting.

Two days and I already don't feel like chatting at all anymore.
But thanks for the experience. Eye-opening.

Bye.
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Old 11-23-2017, 06:24 PM   #5
meeohohmy
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I tried chat 2 times and was simply confused. There was noone chatting in main, it was all people coming into or going out. It would be nice to have webcams in there so we can watch or be watched. Maybe I am missing something?
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Old 11-23-2017, 11:55 PM   #6
RudyGardet
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Quote:
Originally Posted by meeohohmy View Post
I tried chat 2 times and was simply confused. There was noone chatting in main, it was all people coming into or going out. It would be nice to have webcams in there so we can watch or be watched. Maybe I am missing something?
Did you try using the plus symbol next to the main lobby name to check out the other topic based rooms?
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Old 11-24-2017, 02:24 PM   #7
StrongMaster7
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So glad it's not just me.

I've been chatting online for over 20 years. For me, I'd say the 'boom' peaked maybe ten years ago. There were a number of chat utilities (yahoo, among them) that seemed to have a large number of women who enjoyed chatting about sex and were very cool about making sure everyone's needs got met. It was hot, kinky, wild, sweet, friendly, honest, and fun.

Since those days, I find fewer and fewer females who seem friendly and willing to chat. Maybe it's my age. I think the previous posters on this thread nailed most of it.

Just like there are dating services for the over-40s and over-50s, maybe there is a chat site that caters to us?
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Old 11-24-2017, 05:14 PM   #8
txgent101
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Start Your Own Room?

I have experimented with starting a new room, with a title that reflects my interests. Has not often attracted much attention, but it is another way of going about it.
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Old 11-24-2017, 08:40 PM   #9
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I got your message explaining how to use the chat room. Thanks for taking the time to help a girl out!
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Old 11-25-2017, 05:48 AM   #10
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I see there are some basic questions about chat which is great. I'd suggest this link might clear up some of them for those new. http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=1419594
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Old 12-03-2017, 04:07 PM   #11
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I think some confusion could be eliminated if some folks would at least write a teensy bit of a profile. Not asking for your life story, but something, like gender, orientation an interest or two. Could help.
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Old 12-03-2017, 04:22 PM   #12
txgent101
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Totally Agree!

Quote:
Originally Posted by tightmedicine View Post
I think some confusion could be eliminated if some folks would at least write a teensy bit of a profile. Not asking for your life story, but something, like gender, orientation an interest or two. Could help.
It would be great if gender were indicated on the main chat page without having to look at the User's profile. Although one can often infer just from their username.
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Old Today, 11:53 AM   #13
FirmYetGentle
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Quote:
Originally Posted by StrongMaster7 View Post
So glad it's not just me.

I've been chatting online for over 20 years. For me, I'd say the 'boom' peaked maybe ten years ago. There were a number of chat utilities (yahoo, among them) that seemed to have a large number of women who enjoyed chatting about sex and were very cool about making sure everyone's needs got met. It was hot, kinky, wild, sweet, friendly, honest, and fun.

Since those days, I find fewer and fewer females who seem friendly and willing to chat. Maybe it's my age. I think the previous posters on this thread nailed most of it.

Just like there are dating services for the over-40s and over-50s, maybe there is a chat site that caters to us?
I'm not even 30, so I don't think it's your age.

The problem seems to be the abundance of trolls out there who are just trying to create drama while hiding behind anonymity and claiming to be shy people who are unwilling to assume the risk of bumping into creeps. At the same time, they exploit how admins don't care, and then gang up on innocent people by labeling them as trolls while admins are likely to do what's easy instead of doing what's right. That way, they get a quantity of traffic before quality traffic.

The notion of long-term sustainability for the community is forsakened and neglected. This is a trend across the internet though whether we're talking about ERP chat or otherwise.

Last edited by FirmYetGentle : Today at 11:56 AM.
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