Confess Your Embarrassing Boner Stories!

doog_kuron1 said:

I'll throw my proverbial hat in the ring. I was in my late teens when my cousin came to stay. Not very often this happened as she lived quite far away. I think she showed up for the free food and night club scene. so I get up in the morning, half asleep, sporting a pair of boxers and not much else. I'd forgotten she was even there when I bumped into her in the hallway, literally. I was startled but none the worse for wear. I muttered an apology but she wasn't paying any attention to what I was saying at all. Her gaze was fixed on my crotch. Didn't occur to me why but she didn't say a word, just kept staring. I followed her gaze and realised the button had popped and cock my had slipped out and was standing to full attention. I was mortified. I tucked it away best I could and darted to the bathroom. Awkward.

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LizVegas79 said:

Would it be inappropriate to ask how old you both were? (but keep in mind Lit's policy of not posting about anyone underaged please! )

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PrymeNumeric said:

so... a couple of years ago, I was playing soccer and someone was knocked into my lower back and I felt an immediate twinge. And in the next few days it got worse and worse until I was having trouble getting out of bed. I finally went to see my doctor and he promptly sent me to a physical therapist.

When I arrived at the PT, I found a tall, elegant, and willowy woman named Matilda (names changed to protect innocent, etc., ...) She was taller than me and had long, brown hair in a ponytail and large, brown eyes. I was immediately attracted to her and when she smiled, I knew that it would be difficult to keep my thoughts in check.

She reviewed my chart and very professionally talked about injuries of this nature, asking what I had done so far to alleviate the pain, etc.,... I did my best to pay attention and nodded a lot and said "yes, uh-huh" a bunch of times. (The PT office had called me prior to the appointment and instructed me to wear compression shorts and a t-shirt underneath my clothes.)

But I was having a hard time concentrating while looking into her warm, brown eyes. They were calm and inviting and made me feel really comfortable. I had broken up with a girlfriend several months ago and was particularly lonely-- and I realized, very horny. She finished the intake and had me take off my pants and shirt off and wearing the compression shorts, hop up on the table.

I noticed that the drape had opened and another attractive woman had joined us. "This is Sam, and she is training in PT and if it is ok with you, she will be joining us."

"Sure." I said. Relieved to see someone else to break up the tension I was clearly feeling. However, I quickly saw that Sam was shorter, quiet mannered and had a curvy body and large breasts- "This was not going to be easy." I thought to myself.

She and Sam began to "talk shop" as Matilda worked. It helped put some distance between them and me and I began to feel less excited and began enjoying the relief on my back as Matilda worked on it. She began by probing my lower back and asking me questions, then teaching Sam. She then mentioned that she was going to move lower as she had told me previously and I muttered, "uh-huh..." and she then I felt her strong hands move deep between my ass cheeks and press deeply toward my hip socket. Electric jolt. I had not been thinking too clearly enough to realize that lower than my lower back meant my butt.

I jumped when she started kneading my glutes and she laughed out loud while speaking, "Oh dear, are you uncomfortable with that?"

I said, "I understand, I just wasn't expecting that."

"Well don't get your hopes up!" she said laughing, "As I explained earlier, I simply need to see if there is a trigger point injury in your glutes that is referring pain to your lower back. And looking thoughtfully at my ass she said, "There is. That is good to know. Now, please turn over and I want to look at your hip flexors. Often, they can be very tight, which makes you susceptible to repeated injuries of this type."

Her completely professional manner betrayed no other interest than treating my back sprain. And I began to feel embarrassed that I was acting like a junior high jock in a physical- "How transparent can I be?" I thought to myself as I flipped over on my back.

Her hand deftly probed my hip flexors, seeking to determine if they were abnormally tight. She spoke to Sam as she did this and even took Sam's hand and showed her where to probe and what to feel for as she manipulated my flexors. As they spoke about the anatomical muscular terms and indications of tightness they acutely studied my anatomy there- as they should have. I was lying there, relaxing and glad to finally be gaining control of my smoldering excitement when suddenly, my evil, horny subconscious decided it would have some fun with me...

"Wow- they are really only about an inch away from my penis." floated up to my consciousness. "There are two, amazing, wonderful, nurturing, healing, sexy women with four hands and four eyes touching and staring within an inch away from my (now rather loose and increasingly relaxed) penis..."

Wow. Don't think about something and what happens? Yep- my mind was suddenly flooded with images of one, both, all of us doing extra-medical activities. "Ok -" I thought to my horny subconscious, "-- you want to play it like that? Fine. I am having a perfectly natural reaction to a situation requiring medical attention to some personal areas. It is healthy, I am sure it is not unexpected, but also manageable. This doesn't mean anything more or less than that. So take that!"

Matilda spoke, "Pryme? Sam and I think that you have extremely tight flexors. This can be a contributing factor and I would like you to do some take home exercises that will stretch them. Sam will go get you a sheet with some exercises that you can do at home to stretch your flexors- it should help decrease your healing time. In the meantime, I am going to work on them and see if we can't loosen them up. Are you comfortable with that?"

"Sure" I said, having quelled my evil subconscious with an affirming self-declaration of non-shame. Confident that I was now the master of my erections, I relaxed and waited for Matilda to loosen my flexors.

I was really quite surprised how strong a lithe woman could be. Matilda grabbed my leg and worked it and rotated it effortlessly, all the while keeping one hand on my offending flexor. I relaxed, repeated my non-shame mantra and realized that Matilda was really right. My lower back felt relief for the first time in over a week, my butt was relaxed and now my hips began to feel so much looser and open. "Wow!" I said to Matilda, "I can really feel a difference. I feel so relaxed in my entire pelvic region."

She laughed at my enthusiasm. "We often don't realize that we carry tension in parts of our bodies for years. Then some event happens, and the area that we have held so rigid and tense is susceptible to injury. Kind of like you in your entire pelvic region. You need to relax and unwind young man! Being loose is actually, one of the best preventative measures against injuries we can take!"

She had no idea.

She laid my leg back down on the table and turned my foot out to rotate my hip and began to work again. Suddenly, I realized that during her moving my leg around, that she had inadvertently moved my cock around as well. It was laying on its side, pointing up -- perfectly next to my hip flexor. Flaccid, but not slumbering by any means. Off in the distance, I could hear the evil laugh of my subconscious....

Matilda looked down and studied my hip for a second and then made a decision to press on. As she worked the flexor, she maintained her professional demeanor. It was clear that she would not be daunted by the appearance of my manhood. She continued to manipulate my flexor with my hip turned out and her hands were brushing against the shaft of my increasingly relaxed cock. I focused all of my attention on just relaxing and not thinking about it and not avoiding thinking about it. It was "next-level anti-boner control" time and I was going to rise to the occasion and prove myself more than just another hard dick.

Then it happened. Somehow, my penis has been perfectly placed, and while not hard, certainly awakened- her fingers brushed across my frenulum. Zoing! And then before I could renegage my rational mind, she pressed down upon my hip flexor. Somehow, my evil subconscious had managed to place my dick such that when she applied steady strong pressure with her fingers to my hip flexor, it also applied directly upon my frenulum.

I was instantly transported to a new zone of sexual excitement. If there is a record for shortest time to go from flaccid to attaining a once in a lifetime achievement of obsidian like tumescence -- I reached it. It was one of the best boners I have ever had. It would no longer be denied recognition. Nor should it, had I been more confident at the time, I would have held my head high it was an amazing boner. In retrospect, I am fucking proud of that beast!

As Matilda was looking down at my tenting compression shorts and I was hoping that my dick would not pop outside of the elastic band at the top, Sam pulled back the curtain to re-enter the room with the exercise sheet in hand. She took two steps into the room, saw Matilda frozen in indecision, my red face and then she saw the beast- clearly outlined and straining for freedom. Kinda like that scene in Aliens... She froze in her tracks and her eyes were wide as big white circles with a blue dot in the middle. She glanced back and forth between my member and Matilda- awaiting her cue. It was like a moment frozen in time.

For all practical purposes, I no longer existed. Matilda and Sam sprung into action and the they immediately grappled with the beast. Sam grabbed a towel and handed it to Matilda. "Shall we confer on the aftercare plan Matilda?" she nervously asked- keeping one eye trained on my member lest it suddenly burst free.

Matilda continued staring at my erection and replied, "Yes, excellent idea, Sam. Please join me in the room next door." Immediately they vanished. I was alone with my thoughts - and raging erection.

After a few minute, Matilda abruptly burst back into the room and gathered my clothes. She took my hand and helped me to sit up- recognizing that my blood supply was currently severely curtailed. She quickly escorted me out of the room, and guided me to a room with a door instead of a curtain privacy sheet. She sat me on the table and said quickly, "Here. You can stay in this room as long as you need to "cool yourself off."" Big smile. Handing me the towel... "Please take as long as you need and when you are ready, come on out and we can discuss the aftercare. You can just leave the towel in the room." And then just as quickly she was gone again.

I chuckled to myself as I strove to think rationally again. I was not too happy about being routed to this room- however, I wasn't sure what else I expected to happen. In reflection, it was her attempting to be kind and maintain professional standards. I have to admit, after them having made such a big deal about me sprouting a woody, I was a bit embarrassed, but I was also a bit amused. It was like a perfect set of circumstances conspiring to sprout a boner when it was probably not useful. While I appreciated their offer of privacy to "cool down", I quickly got dressed and received my aftercare instructions at the receptionist desk.

As I turned to walk out I was surprised by Matilda following me to the door. As I was about to walk out, she unexpectedly placed her hand on my shoulder, placed her face at my level and gave me a big, warm smile. She was letting me know it was ok, "Please take good care of yourself Pryme!!" She said while looking at me with her big, warm, brown eyes..., ".... and have a grrrrreeeeaaaat afternoon..." she said- emphasizing the word "great".

And so I did.

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patrick91 said:

Last year i was in the hospital for surgery and a cute nurse came in to shave my lower abdomen area since it needed to be trimmed for the surgery. Well, it felt good having her shave me down there, and it didn’t take long before i got a full blown erection. My dick is rather larger (as you can see from my post history) and it got in her way, so she had to wrap her hand around my shaft and hold it back while she shaved me with her other hand.

My mom was in the room and the nurse pulled the curtain around me to give me privacy, but it didn’t fully shield the view from my mom, so she saw this nurse holding my hard shaft and everything

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crashD said:

for you liz...

kind of fits.

i lost a sports bet to a young lady onlne a few years ago. loser had to take pics wear stuff in the other schools color.

i lost.

her school color was red.

so i bought a tight red tshirt, and briefs...

pics were ok, but i decided to top it off with a flourish.

i wrote her name on my hard cock in red - using red nail polish - hey, how did i know??

fuck me, using nail polish remover on our cock is beyond painful..

jesus..

i still make sports bets, but ive never put my cock on the line in that way again..

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LizVegas79 said:

OMG that's too funny!!!

Poor baby. Did it sting or what?

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crashD said:

sting is hardly the right word.

i was red for about 2 days...

i had no fucking idea... lol

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Icy1 said:

Oil removes nail polish off skin.

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Artfan2 said:

Does a boner in school count as personal growth?

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iamtheway said:

Not embarrassing but... Years ago at work, I had one of the department managers press herself back against me in the elevator. She's wasn't my manager, but she was on my floor. We would run into eachother all the time in the breakroom. We flirted innocently. We were on the elevator and it became packed. I was standing in the very back. She backed all the way up against me. I don't know if anyone noticed. I know she felt my hardon sticking in her lower back. As soon as I got hard she pressed her hips tighter back against me. She stayed like that till we got to our floor. When we got off the elevator she looked back and smiled at me. I couldn't help myself, I went right to the restroom and got off.

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LizVegas79 said:

That's an adorable story! Did you ever see her again after that at a company meeting or afterwork party?

I'm on multiple packed elevators just about every Friday and Saturday night. I stopped wondering whether that's a luggage handle or what poking against my back, leg or butt a long, long time ago.

(okay, I can usually tell, but since they're usually guests at the resort I wouldn't have my job very long if I started complaining about it )

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