Depression. Anxiety. Panic Attacks. etc
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Quoll
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intrigued said:Oh, I agree with your first statement completely. I spent two years online after my little breakdown, it's what saved me from completely shutting down.
Again, thank you for being you, and for starting such a helpful thread.
Something that has intrigued
me for years was when I nearly shutdown, I know if I had, it would have been of my own free will, if that makes sense.You often hear of people that have had a breakdown, I guess my question is did they breakdown or did they willingly opt out?
WarmVanilla
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quoll said:Something that has intrigued
You often hear of people that have had a breakdown, I guess my question is did they breakdown or did they willingly opt out?
When I broke down (I wouldn't call it a complete breakdown, I wasn't comittable or anything like that), it wasn't willingly. I'd come home from a day of answering phones and dealing with stupid, mean people, and just lose it. I'd start yelling and screaming and throwing things. I'm not like that at all, normally. And then after a bit, I'd just slump into a corner and cry.
*sigh* I'm glad I have the option to not do that kind of work anymore. It still affects me today.
Quoll
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WarmVanilla said:
WarmVanilla (what is it about that nick that is so nice
) I used to do that, I`d yell at the kids, just for being there, throw my dinner in the sink, and just walk off I hated everything.The kind of breakdown/shutdown I was talking about, it`s hard to put in to words, I nearly decided to just turn off, just sit there, not respond to anyone or anything, I guess I was hoping that they (men in white coats
)would just come and take me away, absolve me of all responsibility, I came to the point when I actually had to make the decision.I guess this is where love comes in because even though I hated everyone, my wife and I are soulmates and I knew it would destroy her.Once,many many years ago when she was literally at deaths door (I still hate the sound of those ventilator machines) she said that I was what brought her back, how could I betray her.
Oops kind of wandered off there.
WarmVanilla
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quoll said:WarmVanilla (what is it about that nick that is so nice
The kind of breakdown/shutdown I was talking about, it`s hard to put in to words, I nearly decided to just turn off, just sit there, not respond to anyone or anything, I guess I was hoping that they (men in white coats
I guess this is where love comes in because even though I hated everyone, my wife and I are soulmates and I knew it would destroy her.Once,many many years ago when she was literally at deaths door (I still hate the sound of those ventilator machines) she said that I was what brought her back, how could I betray her.
Oops kind of wandered off there.
Why, thank you, quoll. I'm not sure where the nick came from. My husband asked why I picked it, and I tried to explain, and he commented, "You know, it just somehow really suits you."
I've not had that sort of shutdown myself for more than a few moments. My husband will normally snap me out of it, and I know he gets worried, so I try not to blank out too often. And for those few moments, it's split. Sometimes it is a retreat, before things get to be just too much.
I don't know where I'd be without love. It helped me get through those years when we didn't know what was wrong. It got me into treatment, as I was too terrified to go on my own. And now it gets me through the rough days, when nothing seems to go right.
Anyway, at least it goes today. Well, somewhat. Hope it's not too bad for everyone else.
babydoll2u
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DLL said:i love it....(especially the last one)
but i will not keep you in suspense any longer I know it was killing you..its dangerously low levis
whispers..I love calling you Q
LOL... I like yours better DLL
Quoll
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Debbie said:
And you also found,
http://www.healthyplace.com/Communities/Anxiety/panicplace/alternative.asp
Thanks Debbie,
Turns out I was actually doing some of the things they recommend, how clever am I.
kikmosa
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Oh yes, Depression, my old friend. He and I visited many a time. I still see him now and then. Along with my old friends Flashback, Nightmares and Insomnia. We got together and partied so often. We shared sad times and bad times, crying jags and pity parties. They held me many a time as I wrecked destruction on my body and soul, supporting me as I cut my way to release from anguish. Never once did they fail to keep me company in my times of self-loathing. At times they were my only friends. At times I feel they still are.
Quoll
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kikmosa said:
KIKI
Thanks for dropping in, but please leave your companions outside with all the others, it`s just over there on the left, yes that`s it the big bin with DEMONS on the side,and please remember to close the lid.
Should you by chance forget to pick some of them up I`m afraid they will not be returned to you. Company Policy.
Thank you sweet lady (I`ve seen your av) it means so much to me that you came by to offer your support, please drop in anytime.
WarmVanilla
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quoll said:Why even your av is, well all, Warm and Vanillery
I hope so. That is me. Another way of pushing my courage by showing myself off a bit. I think it's working.
jacuzzigal
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VermilionSkye said:
Very good point, VS. I wanted to add that hormones effect a lot as well. I have a dear friend who deals with depression which spikes at the time of her cycle. Just a little bit off balance and hormones can effect so many things...
Thanks, everyone, for sharing your experiences.
assister49
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cricketbug said:
I often feel I have no purpose anymore – interesting that you describe this as “nothing fits right” – I can relate to that. What used to give me a lot of pleasure and satisfaction, e.g. career, family activities, etc. no longer does. I feel unimportant – like if I fell off the face of the earth, no one would notice. However I know that is not true… pretty soon the cats would wonder where there food went.
VermilionSkye said:
I suffer from most of the above symptoms.
jacuzzigal said:
I also have the problem of the cycle depression and mood swings. I am up for two weeks, then fall off into depression and feelings of low self-esteem before my period comes. I finally complained to my Dr. who prescribed Prozac. So I will see how that works. She also prescribed a thyroid test which I haven’t got yet. Discussions here will make me go quicker.
Thanks.
jacuzzigal
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assister49 said:
I hope that works for you, A.
*hugs*
Quoll
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assister49 said:I often feel I have no purpose anymore – interesting that you describe this as “nothing fits right” – I can relate to that. What used to give me a lot of pleasure and satisfaction, e.g. career, family activities, etc. no longer does. I feel unimportant – like if I fell off the face of the earth, no one would notice. However I know that is not true… pretty soon the cats would wonder where there food went.
That was one of the hardest things for me to come to terms with, I knew I liked these things and I couldn`t understand why there was no comfort in them anymore.
I used to be a voracious reader, 2 or 3 books on the go at once, it was one of the most relaxing and de-stressing things I had in my life. I worked it out recently, I hadn`t picked up a book in six years, I think part of it was that my mind was constantly reliving every damned thing.
About six months ago I started to read again, I think I`ve found my happy place again, and lit of course.
Assister, you may have just hit on something there, no self respecting cat would give a damn how you feel, they would do whatever it takes to drag you back to reality and then demand, FEED ME.
Sleep deprivation and typing, not a good mix.
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JustSkye
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quoll said:Thank you sweet thing, but you must know it was because you called for help.
You are so very sweet.Assister:
I would check your thyroid first. Seriously. If its off even the tiniest of bits, it throws everything out of kilter. Including hormones, brain chemicals, metabolism...
Tens of thousands of people go mis/undiagnosed each year. They go for treatment after treatment for depression and nothing seems to work. So many doctors won't even bother to look for it. Or if they do, they'll tell you it's "normal" even if off just abit. DEMAND to be tested.
If you have the other symptoms as well ( Hair loss, weight gain/loss, coldness, fatigue, moodiness, hands or face swelling, dry skin, skin problems, insomnia ( the list can go on and on) ), TELL the doc! Don't wait. The thyroid effects everything. EVERYTHING. And if it has quit for sometime and you have not known, you will need to be on medication for the rest of your life. It can be life threatening.
Thank you, Quoll for making this thread! I hope you have helped so many.
cricketbug
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assister49 said:I often feel I have no purpose anymore – interesting that you describe this as “nothing fits right” – I can relate to that. What used to give me a lot of pleasure and satisfaction, e.g. career, family activities, etc. no longer does. I feel unimportant – like if I fell off the face of the earth, no one would notice. However I know that is not true… pretty soon the cats would wonder where there food went.
assiter -- *HUGS* you know you're not alone. We's family here
jacuzzigal
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quoll said:
I second that!
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