how to convince shy wife to explore ?

Well that depends. I mean, if we are talking Josh123's dick, then no. I do not need help there, as it's like a cheese puff. But if we are talking a whale dick, I'm gonna need backup. I can only consume so much dick, dick. (See, if commas weren't important you would've thought I stuttered!)
I just spewed coke everywhere from laughing......thanks pmann thanks alot!!

spit.gif


:D
 
would u anybody say what is going on here ?? i want to close this thread , its just bothering me as all of u move far away from the OP and few are furious to prove them adult . Though its fun but i am not here to hear these bullshits . we all are mature people and have different thought and perspective so nobody will praise u if u try to hit anybody's emotion . better be careful and u will also get supporting replies on your post . :)
 
Only moderators have the ability to close/lock threads, so I'm afraid you're out of luck on that front.

The discussion did veer off topic, but that happens sometimes. Especially when people disagree with one another and/or call someone else out for giving what is (in their opinion) bad advice. Unfortunately, that's the chance you take when you participate in a public discussion forum.
 
Only moderators have the ability to close/lock threads, so I'm afraid you're out of luck on that front.

The discussion did veer off topic, but that happens sometimes. Especially when people disagree with one another and/or call someone else out for giving what is (in their opinion) bad advice. Unfortunately, that's the chance you take when you participate in a public discussion forum.

got it !! thanks for let me know .
 
would u anybody say what is going on here ?? i want to close this thread , its just bothering me as all of u move far away from the OP and few are furious to prove them adult . Though its fun but i am not here to hear these bullshits . we all are mature people and have different thought and perspective so nobody will praise u if u try to hit anybody's emotion . better be careful and u will also get supporting replies on your post . :)

Frankhotfantasy,

You can't close or delete the thread. If it is bothering you in its current condition, I suggest you take the good you got from it, unsubscribe from the thread, and forget about it.
Hope all goes well for you and Mrs. Frankhotfantasy.
 
Frankhotfantasy,

You can't close or delete the thread. If it is bothering you in its current condition, I suggest you take the good you got from it, unsubscribe from the thread, and forget about it.
Hope all goes well for you and Mrs. Frankhotfantasy.

Hi Emerson ,

hmmm....in that case i will not unsubscribe from the post but let it flow , i do not want to forgot about this thread , it is my first post here !! Moreover , its the first time i have reveal my fantasy to anyone/anywhere .

By the way , thanks for your best wishes . everything is going fine between me and my wife . it is just a secret fantasy of mine to see her enjoying the world of sex . it does not mean we are not happy and asking for someone help to satisfy her . Its not about sexual satisfaction but a matter of fantasy keep knocking on my head. i know , i have failed to explain my thoughts clearly but there are many people here who will be agree with me and can understand what i am trying to say. I have not that much courage to tell my wife about this as i don't want to hit her belief and emotion . i do love her and now want to let run everything as it is running from last ten years . we will see what life gift us in future . meanwhile , i don't want to miss my chance to hear/discuss about my fantasy in secret . its suppose to not be a bad idea . what do u people say ??
 
<snip>. meanwhile , i don't want to miss my chance to hear/discuss about my fantasy in secret . its suppose to not be a bad idea . what do u people say ??

Answering your question with one of my own: What would your wife think if she knew you were discussing this with strangers?

There is no right or wrong here, except that which would violate the agreed upon boundaries/expectations between the pair of you. If this is something she'd be upset about you doing, I think you need to tread carefully. Trust, once lost, is very difficult, if not sometimes impossible to regain. Just something to think about.
 
Answering your question with one of my own: What would your wife think if she knew you were discussing this with strangers?

There is no right or wrong here, except that which would violate the agreed upon boundaries/expectations between the pair of you. If this is something she'd be upset about you doing, I think you need to tread carefully. Trust, once lost, is very difficult, if not sometimes impossible to regain. Just something to think about.

I have not think in that way yet . i can't discuss this with my frnds . strangers are better to share as no one suppose to reveal the identity as they don't know !

I agree with u that trust is the most sophisticate thing to tread with . Now , i am finding myself in a odd situation and feeling exhaust and blaming myself that why this thoughts come on my mind . i am too much confused right now .
 
I have not think in that way yet . i can't discuss this with my frnds . strangers are better to share as no one suppose to reveal the identity as they don't know !

I agree with u that trust is the most sophisticate thing to tread with . Now , i am finding myself in a odd situation and feeling exhaust and blaming myself that why this thoughts come on my mind . i am too much confused right now .

That's understandable. I guess I'm just trying to get you to think about what she would think about you participating on a forum such as this, in general. There are some people here, who's spouses would absolutely be furious to learn of their significant other's participation here. On the other hand, there are other Litizens who carry on online affairs/relationships with their partner's full consent. Different rules for different couples.
 
That's understandable. I guess I'm just trying to get you to think about what she would think about you participating on a forum such as this, in general. There are some people here, who's spouses would absolutely be furious to learn of their significant other's participation here. On the other hand, there are other Litizens who carry on online affairs/relationships with their partner's full consent. Different rules for different couples.

yes , u have said well. seems u are a experienced guy ! thanks for share your thoughts . i have no way to share these with her . actually i don't want to let her know that i have share my secret with strangers in spite of sharing with her first . u know , she loves me more than anything and cares me more than i deserve . usually , she expect a lot from me . yes, there is different rules for different couples . rule is i don't want to hurt her a little , not for anything .
 
What is so wrong with looking at the one person with whom you have promised to reveal your most intimate secrets and asking her.. if she might consider hearing you whisper a fantasy to her while you make love?
 
<snip>

By the way , thanks for your best wishes . everything is going fine between me and my wife . it is just a secret fantasy of mine to see her enjoying the world of sex . it does not mean we are not happy and asking for someone help to satisfy her . Its not about sexual satisfaction but a matter of fantasy keep knocking on my head.

<snip>
Do you have reason to believe that she isn't enjoying sex? She may not be as open-minded as you'd like her to be, but that doesn't necessarily mean that she doesn't enjoy what the two of you do together.
 
Woah! What happened here! The normally friendly how-to board has seriously gone off on one. There are a lot trolls who present with a low post count and non-fluent English but it seems the board has unfairly labelled the OP as one and really gone to town on him.

1. English isn't the OP's first language. When he used the word 'share' I think he meant share and discuss his sexual intentions, not share her with another guy.

2. His post is about sharing his sexual desires and broadening the sexual horizons of the two of them as a couple. When he uses the word 'taboo' we don't know what he means by that and what that means where he's from. What we think of mildly kinky might be taboo for him. He hasn't given any specifics. This whole forum is about folks doing new stuff and the overall message from this thread has been the complete opposite.

3. His wife may be 'conventional' but it's not unheard of, of supposedly non-kinky people to be cautious about exploring this and sometimes it needing a partner to reassure them it's okay to explore. He's not trying to get his wife to do anything she doesn't want rather to find out what they want.

4. He wants to do some 'kinky stuff' with his wife and he wants her to enjoy it. That's not as selfish as he's been accused of being. Maybe his lack of fluency made it appear otherwise.

5. The OP has been criticised for discussing his sex life on the Internet rather than with his wife. This is a how-to board and he asked for reasonable advice. Lots of folks here are here without there spouse's knowledge.

I am disappointed in the judgemental responses this board has offered the OP. Yes there are people that pose questions just to troll but that's the price the forum pays for being based in liberal sexuality that promotes responsible sexual development through openness.

I've been following the forum for years now and it goes through cycles of regular posters becoming established and becoming less welcome to newbies. The forum is a how-to but if the how-to questions don't keep coming the board then stagnates.
 
Do you have reason to believe that she isn't enjoying sex? She may not be as open-minded as you'd like her to be, but that doesn't necessarily mean that she doesn't enjoy what the two of you do together.

dear....there is no reason to think that she is not happy with me or not satisfied . its just a fantasy of mine . yes , she is not open-minded like me and that what my post is all about . sharing her is a fantasy but open her up is a need for me . probably , i could be more happy without fulfilling my ultimate fantasy if she start to think kinky and adventurous things . she does not like experiment and i am getting bored by doing the same things every night .........i just want to explore her thoughts . most of us has fantasy , few have fantasy of fuck alien , that not gonna happen in real but they talk about it , think abt that and get aroused . talking about sharing her is like that . i am not dieing to make it happen in real but dieing to explore her thoughts .........
 
Hi shiny5437

I really think you should read through this thread again. The poster(s) who got most of the flak was/were not the OP at all.

Did you, in a glance, look at a couple posts that were critical without actually realising who they were critical of? The OP has been given a fair go here - reasoned advice by and large.

The posts that received most of the ire were not from the OP at all.

So shiny5437, are you going to apologise? :D
 
Please don't call me dear. :)
i am not dieing to make it happen in real but dieing to explore her thoughts
Well, here's the thing: many women are reluctant to share their fantasies with their partners for a variety of reasons:
  • Fantasies are private
  • They're afraid of getting pressured into making their fantasies come true
  • They're afraid of getting judged
  • Obligatory other
 
Woah! What happened here! The normally friendly how-to board has seriously gone off on one. There are a lot trolls who present with a low post count and non-fluent English but it seems the board has unfairly labelled the OP as one and really gone to town on him.

1. English isn't the OP's first language. When he used the word 'share' I think he meant share and discuss his sexual intentions, not share her with another guy.

2. His post is about sharing his sexual desires and broadening the sexual horizons of the two of them as a couple. When he uses the word 'taboo' we don't know what he means by that and what that means where he's from. What we think of mildly kinky might be taboo for him. He hasn't given any specifics. This whole forum is about folks doing new stuff and the overall message from this thread has been the complete opposite.

3. His wife may be 'conventional' but it's not unheard of, of supposedly non-kinky people to be cautious about exploring this and sometimes it needing a partner to reassure them it's okay to explore. He's not trying to get his wife to do anything she doesn't want rather to find out what they want.

4. He wants to do some 'kinky stuff' with his wife and he wants her to enjoy it. That's not as selfish as he's been accused of being. Maybe his lack of fluency made it appear otherwise.

5. The OP has been criticised for discussing his sex life on the Internet rather than with his wife. This is a how-to board and he asked for reasonable advice. Lots of folks here are here without there spouse's knowledge.

I am disappointed in the judgemental responses this board has offered the OP. Yes there are people that pose questions just to troll but that's the price the forum pays for being based in liberal sexuality that promotes responsible sexual development through openness.

I've been following the forum for years now and it goes through cycles of regular posters becoming established and becoming less welcome to newbies. The forum is a how-to but if the how-to questions don't keep coming the board then stagnates.

Hi Shiny , thanks for think about me . yes , English is not my first language . I do have a fantasy of sharing her with a guy , but that is not i asking to u or i am not here for that reason . that a ultimate secret fantasy of mine . many people do have that , i think . But my question was , how to open up her mind first . i thought here will be lot of experienced guy who may face same situation already and could love to advise ...
 
dear....there is no reason to think that she is not happy with me or not satisfied . its just a fantasy of mine . yes , she is not open-minded like me and that what my post is all about . sharing her is a fantasy but open her up is a need for me . probably , i could be more happy without fulfilling my ultimate fantasy if she start to think kinky and adventurous things . she does not like experiment and i am getting bored by doing the same things every night .........i just want to explore her thoughts . most of us has fantasy , few have fantasy of fuck alien , that not gonna happen in real but they talk about it , think abt that and get aroused . talking about sharing her is like that . i am not dieing to make it happen in real but dieing to explore her thoughts .........

mind you - I am still not certain if this is a wind-up - ?

"i am getting bored by doing the same things every night ........."

I will now take a different approach - this is because it is you who is doing the same thing every night. You are totally responsible here and also have the ability to change the situation.

This is not about "hey girl, you are boring - kink it up a bit". What are you actually doing to enhance the sexual relationship you already have? My point is that you seem to be on the verge of stuffing up something really good. Pay attention to your wife in a way you have never done before - as I said in my first posts here - what are you doing to make her feel special? Are you doing this outside of the bedroom? Are you doing this in the bedroom? Pay close attention to your own actions and approach. Observe the responses to your approaches and actions. Try to work out what changes you can make that will improve these responses or most importantly improve how your approaches are appreciated.

You are still writing 'Me me me".

I have never known anyone to ever say "stop this, it feels too wonderful".
 
So really, you need to stop asking "how to convince shy wife to explore ?" - and start asking "how do I become a better lover and sexual partner to my wife?".

Think about this - currently she is not responding, in the way you would like her to, with what you are repeatedly doing.
 
5. The OP has been criticised for discussing his sex life on the Internet rather than with his wife. This is a how-to board and he asked for reasonable advice. Lots of folks here are here without there spouse's knowledge.


The OP said that in addition to ideas on how to help his wife become more open-minded, he didn't want to miss his chance to discuss his fantasy with others. To quote him : it's not supposed to be a bad idea.

And what I wanted him to consider is that the way HE defines bad idea may not necessarily be in line with his WIFE'S definition of bad idea. He has repeatedly said that he loves her and that he would not want to hurt her for the world. So - in that light, if he thinks she would be upset and hurt by his participation on a board such as Lit, he should probably tread carefully in where and how far he takes that discussion.

I'm fully aware that a lot of people are here without their spouse's knowledge or consent. That doesn't negate the fact that some of those spouses would also consider this a breach of trust. If the OP's wife is someone who would have similar thoughts and feelings on the matter, then it pays for him to be very careful in how he presents himself. Presentation is key. Trying to educate himself on how to be a better lover/partner in general might be acceptable to her. Trying to find out how to convince her to get her kink on because he's bored? I'm thinking that probably wouldn't go over as well.

So - color me confused as to how asking the OP to consider how his wife would feel is being critical.
 
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thanks a lot guys ! u do change my thoughts . trying to all newly and make every second special for her . Thanks .
 
Hi shiny5437

I really think you should read through this thread again. The poster(s) who got most of the flak was/were not the OP at all.

Did you, in a glance, look at a couple posts that were critical without actually realising who they were critical of? The OP has been given a fair go here - reasoned advice by and large.

The posts that received most of the ire were not from the OP at all.

So shiny5437, are you going to apologise? :D


That's a fair point and I did make the mistake of losing track of who was posting what, so yes I am sorry and do apologise for any unfair finger pointing! I stand by much of my post as I think the overall message is of tolerance and giving the benefit of the doubt to a new poster. However, I guess I did make a mistake in suggesting this wasn't a view shared by the majority on the thread. Sorry folks!

Boos all round for me! :caning:
 
thanks a lot guys ! u do change my thoughts . trying to all newly and make every second special for her . Thanks .

My post in the thread earlier may have seemed snarky, but it really wasn't. If she had a fantasy of getting you to get fucked by a guy, how would you want that to be brought up? I'm using that as an example because MOST guys don't have that desire.

So let us say you are scared to bring it up. Because your desires might not be something she would necessarily enjoy. Put yourself in her shoes. How would you want something like that addressed to you. How could she come to you with a fantasy that might not be the best for you, but still make you feel okay, even if it wasn't your thing?

I think a key is also to let time work on your side. You might be amazed at the things she will do if you are just patient and don't just order your way through things. Things you once thought improbable may be done without a second thought.
 
But look ....

Fucka be puttin' out some shawtys!!! Oh snap!!! From the window to the wall!!! Skeet skeet muthafuckas!!!

But my favourite part...


Saw this on a thread read-through.... reminded me of a video recently sent to me of that song, done acoustic, in a coffee shop.


Clicky the picky to get low with a cuppa joe.
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