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His Snarky Porcupine
- Joined
- Dec 29, 2012
- Posts
- 13,947
If things have gotten to that point, then it seems to me maybe it would be a (sadly) positive thing to find a very careful and discreet guy with the same sexual tastes and engage in extracurriculars a couple of times a month.
That's assuming you don't feel you're at a divorce place, of course.
In order that you don't mistake my response for "the guy thing" to say, allow me to expand a bit and point out that I first recommended the honesty route, which you've already utilized, as well as the "I'll do X for you if you do Y for me" methodology. I'm not certain where that leaves you if you didn't sign a contract agreeing to sexual limbo at his discretion.
I think more or less anyone would understand extracurriculars being explored in your particular circumstances, if that matters at all.
I've considered it, but I am not a dishonest person. I've been cheated on and lied to in the past, so I couldn't hurt him the same way. Even though I wouldn't consider it cheating, I know he would.
I didn't think it was the guy thing to say, I understand where he is coming from, and I know he sort of sees where I am as well. My libido is higher than his, my needs are greater at times, and he is just one person and can't fulfill them all the time. I know this is also most likely a phase, and that it will pass.