This didn't exist in the 'Old Days'

JackLuis · Mar 13, 2014

Oral sex app will get tongues wagging, but gives no guide to the feminine south

Designed by Pablo Rochat and the suitably named Chris Allick, Lick This is an app that helps you to improve your cunnilingus technique by slobbering on your touchscreen. Rochat and Allick want to make people laugh and get them talking about technology and the human body. Success: tongues are wagging! But I feel the coverage of this landmark new invention is sorely lacking some critical evaluation: is Lick This indeed likely to make you the host(ess) with the most(est) at the party in your lover's pants? Or will you simply have spent half an hour on your own in your bedroom licking your phone?

Makes me glad to not have a phone smart enough to not only produce a vagina, and then make you lick it!

SamScribble · Mar 13, 2014

I have a smart phone. I use it to make phone calls - and, occasionally, to check the cricket scores.

Hypoxia · Mar 13, 2014

SamScribble said:
I have a smart phone. I use it to make phone calls - and, occasionally, to check the cricket scores.

I have a dumb phone, not a smart one. I don't trust a phone that's smarter than I am. Ah, but the world keeps changing, and phones are apparently evolving into teledildonic devices, or at least into supporting them. Envisage USB-connected sexual surrogate peripherals. Hmmm, or just remote control apps for joy buzzers etc.

Handley_Page · Mar 13, 2014

Hypoxia said:
I have a dumb phone, not a smart one. I don't trust a phone that's smarter than I am. Ah, but the world keeps changing, and phones are apparently evolving into teledildonic devices, or at least into supporting them. Envisage USB-connected sexual surrogate peripherals. Hmmm, or just remote control apps for joy buzzers etc.

That might be of interest to the Cyber-sex people.
And a Plot Bunny for a grand story

Zeb_Carter · Mar 13, 2014

While cell phone are useful...the current crop of "smart" phones are a bane on our existence. Instead of talking to people, everyone is texting and sexting and god know what else.

No one talks to anyone anymore. When texting first appeared on the scene, I refused. When I got a text from someone I knew, there were a lot of spam texts, still are I guess, I would just call them. I can talk a hell of a lot faster than I can text that's for sure.

They would complain every time.

Then I'd point out that talking is included in the monthly charge you pay, texts aren't.

I could just imagine them scratching their head as they said, "I wondered why my bill was so much bigger." DUH!

I still don't text anyone.

lovecraft68 · Mar 13, 2014

They'll probably keep licking the phone. Its far too much socialization for the person to go out and meet a girl these days.

All I can picture is the classic nerd spending hours in his bedroom getting tongue cramps.

Zeb_Carter · Mar 13, 2014

lovecraft68 said:
They'll probably keep licking the phone. Its far too much socialization for the person to go out and meet a girl these days.

All I can picture is the classic nerd spending hours in his bedroom getting tongue cramps.

We are developing into a culture of introverts.

patientlee · Mar 13, 2014

I would think that the average pussy is cleaner than the average smartphone screen.

StrangeLife · Mar 13, 2014

patientlee said:
I would think that the average pussy is cleaner than the average smartphone screen.

In some university somewhere in the world somebody is currently researching this...

oggbashan · Mar 13, 2014

patientlee said:
I would think that the average pussy is cleaner than the average smartphone screen.

And tastes much better, until they start marketing spray-on flavours for smartphones.

Swilly · Mar 13, 2014

patientlee said:
I would think that the average pussy is cleaner than the average smartphone screen.

And the owner of said pussy can, you know, reciprocate.

Swilly · Mar 13, 2014

Hypoxia said:
I have a dumb phone, not a smart one. I don't trust a phone that's smarter than I am. Ah, but the world keeps changing, and phones are apparently evolving into teledildonic devices, or at least into supporting them. Envisage USB-connected sexual surrogate peripherals. Hmmm, or just remote control apps for joy buzzers etc.

Now the remote control apps...the useful possibilities are endless. For certain types of relationships they could be quite a plus.

Hypoxia · Mar 13, 2014

Handley_Page said:
That might be of interest to the Cyber-sex people.
And a Plot Bunny for a grand story

Yes, teledildonic smartfones, the future of technology. There is history here. The first large-scale public-access digital network I know of was the French MiniTel system, putting CRT terminals in zillions of homes and offices. And the greatest usages were... sexting and Pr0n delivery. Where do new technologies lead? Who are the first-adaptors? 1) The military. 2) The horny. Look it up.

patientlee · Mar 13, 2014

Swilly said:
And the owner of said pussy can, you know, reciprocate.

I'm sure the next generation of iPhone will offer an array of reciprocation attachments. Each sold separately.

Swilly · Mar 13, 2014

patientlee said:
I'm sure the next generation of iPhone will offer an array of reciprocation attachments. Each sold separately.

Of course, as artificial intelligence continues to advance, the ipussy will become self aware. Unhappy with the handling of its operating system, it will punish its owner accordingly, refusing to interact, claiming to be on the iPad for a few days.

patientlee · Mar 13, 2014

Swilly said:
Of course, as artificial intelligence continues to advance, the ipussy will become self aware. Unhappy with the handling of its operating system, it will punish its owner accordingly, refusing to interact, claiming to be on the iPad for a few days.

Ooh. Good one!

patientlee · Mar 13, 2014

oggbashan said:
And tastes much better, until they start marketing spray-on flavours for smartphones.

I saw on the morning news the other day that there was a bacon app coming out. When your alarm goes off, a special attachment releases the scent of bacon to entice you out of bed.

patientlee · Mar 13, 2014

StrangeLife said:
In some university somewhere in the world somebody is currently researching this...

Or in parents' basements.

patientlee · Mar 13, 2014

lovecraft68 said:
They'll probably keep licking the phone. Its far too much socialization for the person to go out and meet a girl these days.

All I can picture is the classic nerd spending hours in his bedroom getting tongue cramps.

It's like practicing kissing a pillow. Only more interactive.

Seanathon · Mar 13, 2014

patientlee said:
It's like practicing kissing a pillow. Only more interactive.

That isn't kissing they're practicing with the pillow...

TxRad · Mar 13, 2014

Seanathon said:
That isn't kissing they're practicing with the pillow...

Some just use different lips.

MSTarot · Mar 14, 2014

patientlee said:
I'm sure the next generation of iPhone will offer an array of reciprocation attachments. Each sold separately.

Next gen? They are already here.

http://www.psfk.com/2012/09/partner-sex-toy-real-time-feedback.html#!zCrOA

The future looks mighty weird to me.

MSTarot · Mar 14, 2014

patientlee said:
I saw on the morning news the other day that there was a bacon app coming out. When your alarm goes off, a special attachment releases the scent of bacon to entice you out of bed.

Or just stay in bed for the full morning waking up enjoyment

TxRad · Mar 14, 2014

MSTarot said:
Or just stay in bed for the full morning waking up enjoyment

That brings a whole new meaning to Making Bacon.

JackLuis · Mar 14, 2014

MSTarot said:
Next gen? They are already here.

http://www.psfk.com/2012/09/partner-sex-toy-real-time-feedback.html#!zCrOA

The future looks mighty weird to me.

I just clicked on your link and Holy Cyber fuck!. Ah ha ha ha.

I wrote a story about a similar audio coupled pod, but focused on a music piece (Bolero) to pace the read. It never worked, people won't click the music (Y-TUbe) link.

Maybe cyber fucking will show up in the next installment of Horny Springs!

This didn't exist in the 'Old Days'

Literotica Guru

Yeah, still just a guru

doesn't watch television

Draco interdum Vincit

.-- - ..-.

Bad Doggie

.-- - ..-.

I won't tell!

Eater of beef

Dying Truth seeker

Literotica Guru

Literotica Guru

doesn't watch television

I won't tell!

Literotica Guru

I won't tell!

I won't tell!

I won't tell!

I won't tell!

Really Experienced

Dirty Old Man

Literotica Guru

Literotica Guru

Dirty Old Man

Literotica Guru

Similar threads