Coping with trolls and negative feedback

slavemalcom

Virgin
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May 26, 2009
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Just wondered how people handle really negative feedback?

I mean, i realise any story you write will,not cater to eveyones need, and some will not like what you put whilst others will love it. Its the nature of writing but my last story drew some really really negative feedback - most not aimed at the story but at me direct.

I mean, why do people think its ok to write:

"Cra., why do people even bother to write stuff like this and think its a good idea to post. The author should stop writing now, FOREVER."

Obviously the person posted annon, do people just turn off comments or delete the shitty ones as they come through? It really does get you down sometimes.
 
Just wondered how people handle really negative feedback?

I mean, i realise any story you write will,not cater to eveyones need, and some will not like what you put whilst others will love it. Its the nature of writing but my last story drew some really really negative feedback - most not aimed at the story but at me direct.

I mean, why do people think its ok to write:

"Cra., why do people even bother to write stuff like this and think its a good idea to post. The author should stop writing now, FOREVER."

Obviously the person posted annon, do people just turn off comments or delete the shitty ones as they come through? It really does get you down sometimes.

I haven't gotten too much. One person thought I copied Ed Sheeran. I just replied that the poem was written before he was born. True. Best to ignore trolls but I've got a mouth on me so I don't always!
 
Delete is your friend. You're under no obligation to keep shitty comments - set your own criteria for which comments you keep, which you delete.

Some people see it as a badge of honour to keep every comment; I use the analogy of your front yard - you'd clean dog shit of your lawn and crap graffiti off your fence. Your story is your property, so you're within your rights to look after it.

But I also often think, when I go read some of the comments that some writers go on about, "you know, this person actually should pay attention to those comments."**

My view is that folk will tell you if your story is very good or very bad. Those stories right in the middle of the bell curve tend to attract silence.

** I've not looked at your stories or your comments, so this may or may not apply to your content.
 
Some people ignore/close comments.
Some people delete.
Some people run towards explosions.

I run towards explosions. Not historically such an intelligent thing to do...
 
Just wondered how people handle really negative feedback?
You know, every once in a while I like to go on Amazon and read all the 1 star reviews of my favorite books. Are they serious? If so then how can they possibly think that way? Because literally, often the same reasons why I thought the book was brilliant were the same reasons why they didn't like it. For me it's really quite mind boggling, almost to the point where comedic effect can be derived, and to such an extent that I don't even want to read the 5 star ones.

Regardless, at its core I think the premise, that negative feedback is something to be 'handled,' is flawed. You should write because you enjoy writing. If people like it then great, and if not then that's fine too. When you can be your own best audience and when your applause is the best applause that you know of, you're in good shape.
 
You can delete them. But what's read can't be unread so you have to just realize people are assholes. These are the same people who spend their day spewing hate all over social media and do it because no one knows who they are.

You have to accept the fact that although it sounds personal, its not. These people hate everything including themselves and just lash out on any platform that allows anon comments.

Just focus on the good feedback, it is the majority of what we get here.
 
I have received very little negative feedback, probably because I have posted in Romance and Novels and Novellas, categories where folks tend to be civil. (Or because few people read me, but I will go with the category thing).

I have only removed comments that were spam or were completely inappropriate.I have actually found that a nasty comment sometimes prompts other readers to post in rebuttal, so it becomes a net positive.
 
You can delete them. But what's read can't be unread so you have to just realize people are assholes. These are the same people who spend their day spewing hate all over social media and do it because no one knows who they are.

You have to accept the fact that although it sounds personal, its not. These people hate everything including themselves and just lash out on any platform that allows anon comments.

Just focus on the good feedback, it is the majority of what we get here.

I completely agree, and would add that when you get one comment from a reader telling you that what you have written really touched them, it makes every negative remark seem irrelevant.
 
I completely agree, and would add that when you get one comment from a reader telling you that what you have written really touched them, it makes every negative remark seem irrelevant.
Copy that. My ratio of goodness to pond scum is about 50:1. I think I've deleted maybe half a dozen comments in four years, which is down in the noise.
 
Don't let it get you down. Just delete them. There are one or two sad individuals who write the same dumb comment on loads of stories in certain genres.
 
Agreed. You're doing something creative in your life and sharing it. They're hiding behind anonymity to tear you down. It might not help with the natural emotional response, but use your own positive reinforcement to counter their negative comments and keep moving forward.
 
If it’s complete rudeness, I delete. If they are offering criticism but constructively, I’ll leave it. The only ones I absolutely delete are people who post spoilers. They don’t mean to, but their critique ends up giving away the complete story. Those go as soon as I see them. Some readers start with the comments and I don’t want them to be disappointed.
 
Of course the categories themselves can act as spoilers (and the demands of some squeamish readers that they should be warned about anything that might give them the vapors). I'd probably write in Incest more for instance, if stories built on surprise that it is incest isn't made obvious off the top by the category it's placed in.
 
Of course the categories themselves can act as spoilers (and the demands of some squeamish readers that they should be warned about anything that might give them the vapors). I'd probably write in Incest more for instance, if stories built on surprise that it is incest isn't made obvious off the top by the category it's placed in.

Those are the best to drop in LW... pisses them right off. “Surprise! I’m your long lost son. Take that, ma!” But expect a very low score and lots of fan(hate) comments.
 
I'd probably write in Incest more for instance, if stories built on surprise that it is incest isn't made obvious off the top by the category it's placed in.
Yes, it's a bit of a bust for the outcome to be revealed from the get go. That's why it becomes "Incest Bingo" 95% of the time, for me. Usually, you can pick which row to put your pencil on from the first couple of paragraphs. Occasionally I get a surprise, but it's rare.
 
How many times have people said to others how crap real life author X's books are? Granted they already won the game by being in print and got paid, especially the famous ones, but its all about scope. Everyone will get hate, regardless of how popular/successful/money making a story is. The more popular people will just get more hate.

I'm in the category that'd I'd rather get 100 negative comments plastering my stuff than no comments because nothing hurts a writer more than silence. At least with 100 negative comments, whatever written had such a visceral impact they took time out of their lives to feel the need to write whatever comment that did.
 
That Oscar Wilde quote...

...'There is only one thing in life worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.'
I tend to leave the bad and the good up there, unless they are utterly irrelevant to the story.
I delete the sex workers inviting you to get in touch which seem to be more common than I remember? What does annoy me more are the Trolls who will take pleasure in hitting you with a 1 star as soon as possible on release, but not bother to tell you why?
I have a paranoid disposition that sees it as a way to keep down the competition, out of the Hot zone forever. If you get a 1 right off the get go you can almost never get in to the 4.5 bracket, however many 5's you may get after that. It is something to do with the Literotica averaging algorithm. Seems petty to me?
 
If you get a 1 right off the get go you can almost never get in to the 4.5 bracket, however many 5's you may get after that. It is something to do with the Literotica averaging algorithm. Seems petty to me?
Not so - it just takes a bit longer. My last story had a "strategic 3" and a one-bomb in the first five votes. It broke 4.5 around 25 votes, and is now my 8th highest after 45 votes. The one bomb was swept, the effect of the 3 disappeared over time as the story settled into more 5s than 4s. The "algorithm" is straight average, there's nothing fancy about the maths.
 
After reading your story titles, bylines and your bio it's pretty obvious what the content is going to be about. So why, one has to wonder, do people who hate bi/sissy/femdom read your tales? My guess is that they're fighting so hard to control their own desires that the mere idea that someone might live a happy, content, non standard life doing the things they dream of compels them to write nasty comments.
 
Yes, it's a bit of a bust for the outcome to be revealed from the get go. That's why it becomes "Incest Bingo" 95% of the time, for me. Usually, you can pick which row to put your pencil on from the first couple of paragraphs. Occasionally I get a surprise, but it's rare.

Probably because the category is incest.:rolleyes: Having no incest would be the surprise.

As for getting right into it, that goes back to the stroke v slow burn/actual story where at that point the author can at least build towards something and briefly have the reader wondering when, but they're never going to wonder what because with no incest you're in the wrong category.

Even if you play the game of the MC meets someone takes and interest has amazing sex falls in lover....if I'm reading in incest its only a matter of time before the author tells me that lover is a estranged family member...why? Cause its incest.

Same can be said for any category A threesome in group sex? Shocking! An older man with a young woman in mature? Never saw that coming!

The categories are based on kink with the thought people can find exactly what they're looking for and the only surprises you can deliver aren't surprises, but more in the sense of good spins, unique scenes, and a compelling story.

The other surprise is to add different kinks so its not just incest, but something else tossed in. Something I learned....Hardcore BDSM in incest does not go over that well.:eek:
 
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Best I ever did for surprise in Incest was to create a little confusion about which sister MC was going to end up with. Of course there were complaints that I should have foreshadowed it more, but that's Lit.
 
I've learned to develop a thick skin and ignore or laugh at them. I don't delete anything, but the site admin has deleted plenty of comments that were deemed inappropriate.
 
There was one anonymous commenter, somehow he (I think it's a male) tweaked me the wrong way - nothing too extreme - but the hot weather here has made me cranky so I challenged him to a duel. Word processors, typewriters, or quill pens at five paces. En garde!

In other words, show me your stories so I can see what you've got. Okay, so maybe he's just a reader, so I also asked him to point out some of his favorites here so I can see what he likes. I'm not sure he'll do it, but maybe he will.
 
I think your problem is that you've shown you care. That's all the commenter is looking for--something to apply under the edge of your shell and twist.
 
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