The Author's Hangout Vending Machine

Tio_Narratore said:

and England swings like a pendulum do.

I put in a seance at Westminster...

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Handley_Page said:

and you hear "Order, Order" from an empty chair.



I put in a pair of ear defenders

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Artina Heartflash said:

and now you can hear the train of angels singing

I put in a pair of purple bikini panties
which my hubby found on the floor of the grocery last night. (I kid you not.)

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Handley_Page said:

but they have to go back to the Grocer's wife



I put in a new pair of red socks

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Artina Heartflash said:

and a baseball player uses them as ball warmers.

I put in a bun warmer

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Handley_Page said:

which is affected by the snow



I put in a blown fuse

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Tio_Narratore said:

and it gets replaced by a resetable circuit breaker.


I put in a wad blown at the casino...

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Artina Heartflash said:

and the vending machine rolls back to you two cherries and a firecracker.

I put in a green arrow

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Tio_Narratore said:

and you go in the direction it points.

I put in a GPS systems with a random location generator function...

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Handley_Page said:

And that, Officer, is why I was found in the Ladies. . . . .



I put in a chastity belt

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Tio_Narratore said:

and M'Lady has a spare key.

I put in a Knight Errant or an errant knight...

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Handley_Page said:

who gets sent on an errand


I put in a hard drive dock

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Artina Heartflash said:

and still the golf ball bounces into the water.

I put in an unused, wet, crumpled Taxi Dancer ticket

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topace said:

and out comes a New York submarine sandwich.

I put in my lack of ability to write a one-shot...

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Handley_Page said:

and out comes a self-loading ability



I put in a very slow, electric, washing machine

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topace said:

and out comes a modern water-saving one.

I put in one of the new plastic $20 bills from up here...

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Handley_Page said:

but it's not water-proof and gets destroyed.



I put in an electricity meter

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Artina Heartflash said:

And a bolt of lightning cracks it
(which makes it a highly attractive focal point on a steampunk top hat)

I throw in a barbell ear ornament, pulled from the lobe of a doctor who threw a dart at me.

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Handley_Page said:

but it is too heavy for the alien



I put in a small spaceship

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Artina Heartflash said:

and you get back a fistful of Mars Bars

and some Bermuda shorts dappled with crazy red and green triangles which make the eyeballs spin


I put in a full tank of gas for a charity mobile

Peace and love to all...

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Handley_Page said:

and it is HUGE!


I put in a Gas Tank full of LPG for cooking.

[ Amen to that, Sister. ]

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Noor said:

and you get an annotated cookbook

I put in a van that never breaks down.

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Artina Heartflash said:

and someone steals the engine.

I put in an army bus full of lusty soliders... I mean soldiers

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Handley_Page said:

all of whom are very, very drunk & incapable.



I put in an emergency OFF switch

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Noor said:

and you get breakfast

I put in a blue painters tape

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