Best sentence you've ever heard?

"When was the last time you conjugated anything?"

"So if you don't like getting fish-slapped, I'm gonna need you to stick to our agreement."

"I don't know if I don't know nothing."

"Let's go get some dumb-ass pie."
-MiB3
 
"Tampering with my daughter may result in an ass-whoppin' you'll never forget."
[sign on Dad's car window]
 
"You gotta be kidding me. We're in his mouth. We're in his mouth."
-Godzilla(1998)
 
Both from here

"It's not likely that anyone's out at a whale farm trying to fuck a whale or pull on his weird-ass whale hog, whereas it's very likely that this product only exists because nobody can resist the name Moby's Dick."

"It's ridiculous, of course, yet it's quite possibly more plausible than someone watching Pure Nude Yoga because they want to learn how to do yoga."
 
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Plenty is at our doorstep, but a generous use of it languishes in the very sight of the supply.

F D. R
 
"You're embarrassed? I just got cock-blocked by my mom."

"I was offended there for a second, but then you said 'No offense', so everything is cool."
-Beer League
 
"My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions, loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next."

-Maximus Decimus Meridius
 
"A hot ass won't get you through your entire life. When you turn 30 you'd better have a personality."

-Be Cool
 
"Does this mean I have to give back the bazooka?"
-One Crazy Summer
 
I think if you do something and it turns out pretty good, then you should go do something else wonderful, not dwell on it for too long.

-Steve Jobs
 
"Silly monkeys, give them thumbs, they make a club and beat their brother down."

"How they survive so misguided is a mystery."
-tool
 
"Though often horrible people, celebrities used to have a plausible approximation of talent in order to be popular."
 
"And honestly, we can't seem to get an interview with him to find out, possibly because we've never tried to do that or even really thought about it at all."

"The first is the goodly Sir Date of Rapiste, who feels the need to remind us in every other scene how he's about half a broom thistle away from becoming a walking billboard for YeOldeMegansLaw.com."

"Unlike your typical crappy*Lord of the Rings*medieval brawl where the protagonists kill hundreds of faceless enemy minions before breakfast, our book-hunting heroes prefer to have five-to-one odds in their own favor and proceed to barely scrape by running away from every battle."

http://www.somethingawful.com/movie-reviews/merlin-book-beasts/1/
 
"The only vampires I'm worried about are the ones passing the bar exam."

-Blade Trinity
 
I don't want them to gain another yard, I want you to blitz all night.

-Remember The titans
 
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