What makes you feel loved?

Friends,

I’ve been posting here a long time. Over the years, I’ve exposed my body, my insecurities, my failures, my sadness.
~ snips ~
And it makes me wonder... What makes you feel loved?

I wasn't sure if you'd posted on the right site - I'm still not. :confused:
Love is one thing in short supply on the GB unless you're into the BDSM stuff.
 
I love that you’re sticking around, and quoting Anaïs Nin.

Simple, thoughtful gestures, knowing what will make me laugh, a touch, a kiss and a look those are some of the things that make feel loved.

Knowing what will make me laugh is a big one for me. My best friend always sends me silly memes that remind her of me (often cats) and they are always hilarious and perfect.

Yah. Feeling known works for me, big time.
 
I wasn't sure if you'd posted on the right site - I'm still not. :confused:
Love is one thing in short supply on the GB unless you're into the BDSM stuff.

I don’t know. I’ve always been pretty lucky around here. Maybe because people know a wounded animal when they see one or maybe because I’m already hard enough on myself and that takes the sport out of it.

I like to think I have a guardian angel here who somehow manages to keep me relatively safe. I’m prone to that particular brand of magical thinking.
 
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I love that you’re sticking around, and quoting Anaïs Nin.

Simple, thoughtful gestures, knowing what will make me laugh, a touch, a kiss and a look those are some of the things that make feel loved.

Yes, the small things.

I go out to my car and find that, without saying a word, he had brushed off the snow.

When we stand in line at the check out or to buy movie tickets, he hooks one finger into the back belt loop of my jeans and gently, almost imperceptibly, tugs.

An odd thing I noticed that touches me. When we eat together, he never takes his first bite until I have taken mine.
 
Good one. Especially since I wouldn’t have come up with it on my own.

I’m such a greedy goat. Past partners have complained.

I find this so hard to do. Probably because I’ve mostly been single.

It's a little thing, but a big deal.

When you care about someone, you naturally think about them in your plans, at least I do.
 
What makes me feel loved...
Knowing someone cares enough to
Discipline me.
Plus, its goddamn motherfucking hot.
 
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Speaking of love in a more general sense:
People who don't judge you or are willing to forgive you, and suppport you even when you're at your lowest self.

I had one of those moments many years ago, and I was pleasantly surprised to realize that there are so many great people out there. Internalizing that experience did wonders to my sense of self.
I also severed a couple of ties permanently after that.
 
Being there for me.

Listening to me - and more, hearing me. Not interrupting. Absorbing what I've said without turning it into something about you.

supporting me, encouraging me. Not discouraging me.

Staying around. Not leaving.

Sharing yourself with me.
 
The way Ape looks at me.

My son giving me a spontaneous hug.

How excited the brothers Grimm get when I come home.
 
The way he looks at me when I’m telling a story. Like it’s the most fascinating thing he's ever heard.

When he grabs my hand while we’re walking or hiking.

When he opens doors for me and puts his hand on my back as I walk in first.
 
Great question,
meandering answer-

I guess anything that demonstrates she's been paying attention to me. Anything invested with thought, time, effort, planning or capital.

I'm a sucker for being surprised with the right chocolate, the right flowers, the right jewelry, or simply the right sandwich or deli food picked up on the way home. I've been on the giving end of that stuff with little effect in previous relationships, so I appreciate what goes into that.

I also truly appreciate being driven to the Emergency Room when need be wherever we are, and having her handle the paperwork.

Blowjobs work, too. Not because I'm one of those people that think that "nothing beats a blowjob," ( my dick prefers the sensation of positive pressure ) but from a psychological standpoint, I'm always amazed that anybody would do that for me because I can't imagine sucking a dick myself. It makes me think "She likes me! She really likes me!" Yeah, I know, women can find performing oral sex as interesting as I do, and don't find dicks disgusting, but in the moment I'm hearing the complete lyrics to Irving Berlin's "Thank You Very Much."


To answer a related question-
What made me fall in love with her?

Cheyenne brought me Godiva Dark on the first date. That made her unforgettable, and since I kept thinking about her, it was only a matter of time.
 
Trust, nothing more than that. Knowing the every decision she makes is with me in mind and making every decision on my own with her in mind.

Inevitably there will be missteps, part of life. But the trust in knowing that even if mistaken the thought of the other was there.
 
Being there for me.

Listening to me - and more, hearing me. Not interrupting. Absorbing what I've said without turning it into something about you.

supporting me, encouraging me. Not discouraging me.

Staying around. Not leaving.

Sharing yourself with me.


But mostly, not interrupting, right?
 
Yes, the small things.

I go out to my car and find that, without saying a word, he had brushed off the snow.

When we stand in line at the check out or to buy movie tickets, he hooks one finger into the back belt loop of my jeans and gently, almost imperceptibly, tugs.

An odd thing I noticed that touches me. When we eat together, he never takes his first bite until I have taken mine.

Love is such a sweet, almost imperceptible tug sometimes. You describe it beautifully.

Those things would make me feel loved, too.
 
I don’t know. I’ve always been pretty lucky around here. Maybe because people know a wounded animal when they see one or maybe because I’m already hard enough on myself and that takes the sport out of it.

I like to think I have a guardian angel here who somehow manages to keep me relatively safe. I’m prone to that particular brand of magical thinking.

I'm confused as to whether you mean on Lit or RL, but ignoring Lit, where love is as rare as rocking-horse shit ( though I concede it does exist ) then RL...
Well, it's a million tiny little things that, when you add them all up, they mean we are supposed to be together... and I knew it. I knew it the very first time I touched her. It was like coming home... only to no home I'd ever known... I was just handing her a 110v transformer and I knew. It was like... magic. ;)
 
Unexpected Hug

My wife of forty plus years giving me an unexpected hug for no reason at all.
 
The way he looks at me when I’m telling a story. Like it’s the most fascinating thing he's ever heard.

When he grabs my hand while we’re walking or hiking.

When he opens doors for me and puts his hand on my back as I walk in first.

Ahhh :heart: .. The good ol days.

What makes you feel loved?

When someone does something for me because they want to, not because they have an interest.
 
Totally get that. Being understood is a great feeling. One of my best friends told me this morning that we should talk more often because I get him and he can be himself with me. I’m so glad he feels that way.

Trusting people to be there for you when the chips are down is harder than it looks sometimes. Especially when the chips are really, really down. Humans tend to want people to think everything is alright, even when it’s not.

One thing’s for sure, surviving this life alone is way harder than surviving it with people.

Well said. That 3rd sentence of the 2nd paragraph is pretty much how I tend to be. What amazes me is the extremely few close to me see thru the smoke screens and BS and do it anyway in their own little way.
 
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