Sia's Cozy Abode

You,

A long time ago we wrote together. Chatrooms. Nonsense roleplay. Star Wars. We wrote well together and you became a favorite partner. I had no idea we'd become friends. Or stay friends. I hope you know that I'm always there for you to bend my ear.

You've seemed really happy lately. It's awesome.

You're a beautiful person and one of the people I've known the longest when it comes to writing. Longer than anyone else around here, for sure.

Think of you more than I would ever admit.

-Me

Cuteness!

I cannot even express my anger at this moment or the hurt. A good day with the family turned ugly and I'm done. I'm tired and sick of the judging and the almighty opinions above mine. I'm never right. And I'm so tired of feeling the need for approval so I'm done. I've breaking up with my best friend. It hurts but at least I can stop second guessing myself and looking for approval for each decision I make for my life. It's time to make those decisions for me and not look to someone else for approval. I don't know how well I'll deal giving up my nieces and nephew but I'm tired of feeling bad about me. My mom and brother can suck it. My dad I love you and will talk to you as I can.

The months which have passed have been busy on a social scale. I found my way to apologize to my family for my part of the argument; however my brother hasn't forgiven me. He said he did, but he lied. I've yet to see any of family and its hurtful. I received a call from my dad last Friday and during the conversation he casually mentioned how they'd be in the area with my brother. I think it's fantastic how they'll make time to see my brother, but not me. My brother who use to tell me when our parents would be in town said nothing. I see where I stand. I won't pretend it doesn't hurt, but at least I know my family doesn't miss me or need me around. I'm glad to know they've easily cut me out of their lives as soon as I gave them a reason.

Life isn't too terrible. Things are changing on all avenues though I think for the good. I'll fall flat on my face or there will be success. All in all it could be worse. Of course figuring out what I want to be when I grow up is proving to be a challenge.

*runs in for a drive by hug*

You want to be a Toys R Us Kid, duh!

*runs off*

*tries to hug tight, she slips by*

Hello friend... I'm so glad to swept by!

I gave some thought to those in my life who I have truly loved...

My daughter - without question, always.

Yes, my immediate family even when I've hated them.

My guy - I love him... I honestly do... We a rough spot in the beginning and even then without as much invested I was miserable. It's truly scary how connected I've allowed him to be to me. I have said before ... this is the one, but I've never believed it like I have now and even now I'm reluctant, I'm scared. We'll see... but I want him.

I'm happy.
I'm content.
I'm settled.