Thompson vs Thompson (closed for Gr8chtr)

Teri was half out of her seat when Walker started talking about walking in the woods. She sank back down into the chair. What the heck? She had barely made it through this luncheon without doing anything too horribly embarrassing. Although she hadn't missed his glazed look when she talked about music. It was the same look that she would have had if he had started talking movies. But could she make it through another day with Walker? Did she want to? Did she have a good reason not to? To be honest, she wanted to say no, but to be fair, he had provided lunch today, so it was only fair that she provide lunch for their walk. Walk in the woods, where it was private? What did Walker have in mind? Oh jeez, she needed to say something. But what?

“A walk.. in the woods.. on Sunday?” she stammered. Oh, good grief. She shut her mouth and swallowed hard. This was a good sign to say no. Didn't she need to do something that day? Anything would work. She opened her mouth again, “Sure, I would like to do that.” She wasn't sure who was more surprised, Walker and her. But they both seemed shocked that she had agreed to go. In a fog, she stood and muttered a simple good-bye and walked out leaving him sitting at the table.

What had she done? Now she was committed to seeing Walker. She spent the rest of Friday and half of Saturday freaking out. What should she do? How could she get out of it? What should she wear? What food was she supposed to put together. Thank goodness, it was the weekend and she didn't have any major cases as she didn't seem to be able to get her thoughts together. Finally out of desperation, she talked to Beth.

The two were in Teri's apartment sitting at her kitchen table over a glass of wine. “I don't know what I am doing,” Teri exclaimed. “He wants to go on a hike in the woods, a picnic of sorts I guess. I don't know how to date. I don't know how to do small talk. I don't know what I should do!” she wailed.

Beth tried to look serious but it was obvious that she wanted to laugh. “What is the big deal? So you go tramping in the woods and eat something. You like to do those things. You do them all the time on your own, so why are you all freaked out?”

“I don't know, I just am.”

“Wait, do you like this guy? I mean really like him? It is okay if you do, you know,” said Beth carefully.

“I don't know. I don't know how I feel. Sometimes I think yes, other times I think no, I don't know what to think, but all I seem to do is think about how much I don't know what to think. It is driving me crazy,” The plaintive tone in Teri's voice made Beth laugh.

“Well the first thing you should do is relax. You have gotten yourself all tied up in knots. Why don't you take a deep breath and slow down. Maybe we can figure this out.”

Teri took a deep breath and slowly released it. Then another and another. The manic disorder in her brain began to slow and she closed her eyes, taking more deep breaths. When she felt she had some control over herself, she began to speak, keeping her eyes closed. She wasn't sure she wanted to see laughter or worse pity in her best friend's eyes.

“I have always had a like/dislike thing with Walker. He is good looking but it is more than that. He sometimes has a sense of fairness even when fighting for his client that I appreciate, other times he seems to let little things slip by or exaggerate something. I can't tell if he is a good lawyer or a haphazard one. Then there was the incidents in the last couple of weeks. I came upon him at Quincy's after he had done a total hissy fit in front of my client during one of the meetings in the divorce case. He just went crazy yelling stuff and slammed out of the room. Later, at Quincy's, I saw him sitting in the corner with several empty beer bottles in front of him. So I know he drinks too much and that scares me. Later that day he called me up and it was obvious he was drunk. He went on this long rant, half of which I couldn't understand, but it had something to do with other lawyers in town making comments about my clothing. It didn't make any sense, it was actually kind of funny, but still …”

“Why didn't you say something at the time, Teri?” asked Beth. “We could have reported him to the Legal Oversight Committee for the county.”

“That's why I didn't say anything,” explained Teri. “I knew you would say we should report it and I didn't want him getting in trouble for doing a stupid thing. Like I said, I thought it was sort of funny at the time. But, now, I don't know what to think.”

“Is it possible that you didn't say anything because you like him?” wondered Beth.

Teri blushed. “I don't know, maybe. But what is the point? It isn't like there is going to be any kind of relationship. You know I don't do relationships. So what is the point?”

“Well, maybe, you don't have to worry about a relationship, maybe you could, I don't know, maybe just do something with him and have fun. See if a friendship could develop? It might be nice to have someone to do things with, now that I don't have as much time to spend with you since Jack and I got married.”

“I suppose,” Teri replied slowly. “I guess it wouldn't hurt to get to know him better, maybe we could develop some sort of friendship. I hadn't thought of that.” Her eyes flashed as her sense of humor kicked in. “At least if I get to know him, I will learn how to take him down faster in court,” she laughed. She stood up and walked around the table and gave Beth a hug. “Thanks, I needed to talk all that out. I am still not all that comfortable about the idea of “dating” but if I focus on friendship, at least my brain doesn't go into overdrive.”

Beth stood, “Then,” she said,”my work is done here.” She laughed, “I better get home before Jack goes into overload and I have another crisis to deal with.”

Teri laughed. Jack was the most laid-back human Teri had ever met. The idea of Jack Samuels's head about to explode just wasn't something she could picture. “I wouldn't want to be responsible for that. So, yes, you better get home and prevent the house from exploding when his head does.” The two women laughed as they walked down the stairs to the front door.

“Remember to have a good time and RELAX!” Beth said as she headed down the sidewalk to her car.

“Relax, right. Okay, I can do that. All I have to do is just show up with some food and walk. I can do that. Relax.” Teri repeated the refrain several times the next couple of hours. “But what am I going to pack for a picnic lunch? Wait, relax... relax...you can do this.... relax.”

Daniel was ecstatic. He had managed, fairly easily, to arrange another “date” with Teri. And, it was only two days hence. Granted, taking a couple hour hike with something like a picnic lunch, isn’t exactly a romantic event. Indeed, Daniel thought, it could be mistaken for an interest in being buddies, or something like that. In this case, though, Daniel had specifically used the term “date” with reference to their lunch, so Teri shouldn’t be too uninformed about the nature of his interest. Still, how to convey his interest without scaring Teri away was something to think about.

Normally it took Daniel about 5 minutes to prepare for a couple hour walk. His preparations for this outing with Teri consumed several hours on Friday evening, all day Saturday, and on Sunday morning. First, he had to decide what to wear. Often when hiking he wore an old, ratty pair of jeans or his old shorts with a ragged hole in the back pocket. This would not do. The choice was obvious. Daniel dug out the pair of Cabella khaki hiking shorts that he used to wear for hikes around Philadelphia. He was embarrassed to admit it to himself, but he realized that these shorts ended well above his knee, showing off a lot of his tanned legs, well-toned by his daily bike rides and his frequent hikes. Yet, the shorts weren’t short enough to look like he was deliberately showing off. The shirt choice was a no-brainer also. Instead of wearing the pocket-T that he often wore, he dug out the very nice REI Sierra shirt that Jill had bought him once for Christmas. Jill had once told him that he looked really hot in that shirt. One could only hope. The clothing selection didn’t take long, but both items would have to be washed and ironed. Daniel took all of his professional work clothes to the local dry cleaners; he hadn’t ironed anything since his law school days. He hoped that he still remembered how to do it.

Then there was the house cleaning. Sure, they had absolutely no plans to come back to his house and he thought the likelihood of that was just about zero. But, one could never be sure. Suppose in an impulsive moment, Teri said, “Daniel, I’d like to see where you live.” Impulsive, Teri? Still, he couldn’t take the chance. The house cleaning took the better part of a day, ending just in time for Daniel to drive into town to get his hair cut. Sunday morning was reserved for personal grooming, shower, shave, even a little bit of manicuring.

Before leaving Quincy’s Daniel and Teri had agreed on a time to meet at the trail head. Daniel arrived a few minutes ahead of the appointed time, locked his car, donned his daypack that included water and a few miscellaneous items, and sat down at the edge of the parking lot. He had had enough time to devise a plan to signal that his interest in Teri was not merely friendship. Daniel knew this trail well; his plan presented itself effortlessly.

Daniel saw Teri’s car pull into the far end of the parking area at the trailhead. He watched her alight and retrieve her own daypack which, presumably, included their lunch. God, she looked both beautiful and hot all at the same time. At that instant Daniel realized two things. First, Teri was not a trophy to be won. For Daniel courting Teri was not about a conquest. Second, in terms of initial attraction Daniel wanted Teri as much as he had ever wanted any other woman.

On Sunday, Teri still hadn't decided what food would be best for a hike. She didn't want to carry a heavy pack and she had no idea where Walker would want to stop. She put on jeans, a tshirt, and hiking boots. She braided her hair and threaded the braid through the back of a cap. Into her backpack she put a couple of extra pairs of socks, her first aid kit, four bottles of water, and a couple of energy bars. She always kept an emergency blanket, fire starters, a flashlight and compass in one pocket, so she checked the batteries to make sure they worked. This was only going to be a two hour hike on the maintained trail, but she had been taught by her father to always be prepared.

Her mother taught her to use the bathroom before hiking, so that she could avoid tree bark in her pants. There were times that Teri had had to make do with an emergency stop, but she had learned to lean against a rock rather that a tree, after her first time hiking. She smiled at the memory of picking out bark from her underwear when she was eight. Taking a look around the apartment to make sure she hadn't forgotten anything, Teri headed down the stairs to her car.

She stopped at the deli and picked up sandwiches, chips, and a couple of cookies. She wasn't sure what Walker liked so she kept it simple: roast beef and cheddar cheese. Carefully packing the food in her backpack, she headed for the trail head. There was a parking area there and a ranger's station. Pulling her sedan into one of the spaces, she parked and grabbed her backpack.

She didn't see Walker at first, but as she headed for the large map posted at the beginning of the trail, she spotted him. She veered off toward him and noticed that he had his own full pack resting comfortably on his shoulders. She was glad to see that he had it riding high. She saw hikers all the time trying to walk with their pack riding low and pulling back their shoulders. It was an easy way to mess up one's back. She had her own pack carefully settled between her shoulder blades where it rode comfortably.

She wouldn't have said it aloud, but Daniel Walker in outdoor clothing looked good. She liked that he wore hiking shorts rather than the baggy half shorts/half pants that so many males wore. She had never really understood the purpose of shorts that made the body look half its size. She was careful not to laugh when she saw his shirt. Only Walker would wear a shirt that needed to be ironed to hike in, and he made fun of her clothes? At least he was smart enough to wear hiking boots also. She wondered what he packed in his bag, if it was packed with practical things or, more likely, his cell phone and an I-Pad.

“Good morning,” she said as she approached.

As Teri drew closer Daniel got a better look at how she was dressed. He was surprised to see her dressed so casually; he wasn't sure that she had a "casual" side. Without a doubt, however, she looked really good in her jeans and T-shirt, both of which outlined her body rather nicely. And, unknowingly, she had played into one of Daniel's favorite looks. For some reason that he never understood he was particularly attracted to women's style of putting their braids through the back of a cap. He probably could have, Daniel realized, been OK with his usual attire, which was little different from what Teri wore.

They moved off calmly down the hiking trail. Much to Daniel's surprise and delight he and Teri fell easily into conversation about hikes they had each taken previously, where they liked to hike and what they most enjoyed about it, and about observations that they made as they walked together. It was apparent to Daniel, and, he thought, probably to Teri also, that they had found at least one thing that they shared strongly in common.

The hiking trail was, in turns, wide enough to walk side-by-side or so narrow as to require a short single-file arrangement. Without discussing it one or the other of them would take the lead until the path widened sufficiently. Those occasions in which Teri was in front provided Daniel with ample opportunity to view her from behind. On the first such occasion, unbidden the thought "nice ass" rushed through Daniel's mind. At first he chastised himself for his vulgar thought, then quickly turned to accepting the obvious: this was no slur. "Besides," Daniel told himself, "who knows, maybe Teri thinks I have a nice ass." That thought so amused him that a big grin crossed his face just as the trail widened sufficiently to allow them to walk together. In pivoting to the side-by-side arrangement Teri caught him grinning. Somewhat playfully she asked him what was so funny. Daniel hesitated, then decided to self-disclose, well, at least partially. "I was thinking, Teri, about how good you look in casual attire. You and I usually only see each other dressed formally." He hesitated, then went on with his self-disclosure, "To be honest, when I go hiking I typically wear something very much like you are wearing. In thinking about today's walk with you I somehow convinced myself that I had to look like a picture out of the REI or Land's End catalog." Daniel chuckled, "God, I'm silly sometimes. I guess I should just relax and be myself around you."

At about three quarters of a mile past the trail head they came to a spot where the trail became somewhat steep and covered with loose gravel. This trail was not even close to being challenging for either of them, but this part offered the first stretch where having worn hiking boots was warranted. Daniel knew this trail well; this was the spot that supported his plan to signal that his intentions with Teri were not ones of only friendship. Moving to the front position as the path narrowed, when the trail began to ascend over the gravely surface Daniel turned to face Teri, making sure to make direct eye contact. "I know that you won't have any serious difficulty with this section of the trail, but I know it well. So, here, let me give you a hand."

Holding their gaze Daniel stretched out his bare hand to Teri, daring her to make the physical contact and embrace the symbolism that it implied.

Teri was surprised how comfortable the flow of conversation went as they walked along the trail. She smiled when he said he had dressed up for her and had a moment of worry that maybe she should have dressed up more also. But hiking was sweaty, dirty work and besides, she didn't have any fancy REI clothes.

Instinctively they walked side by side except in places the path narrowed. Teri had hiked these trails many times so she was surprised when Walker turned and held out his hand to help her over a patch of slippery ground. Her first reaction was to wonder if he thought she was such a girly novice that she couldn't walk the path on her own. She wasn't sure she wanted to touch his hand, having been shocked every time they had touched before. But he was being a gentleman and assisting her, so she shrugged and put her hand in his. Sure enough, that same zap of energy ran from her hand to her shoulder. It didn't last long and she managed to keep from yanking her hand from his, but she was sure getting tired of that electrical jolt. They continued to walk down the trail and Teri was very surprised when the path smoothed out and he still held her hand.

They walked a bit, hand in hand, talking about the squirrels and birds they saw. At one point they stopped to check out a bird and after a short discussion as to the type of bird it was, they concluded that neither of them was positive. The fact that he was willing to admit that he wasn't sure surprised Teri. She didn't think Walker would ever admit to not knowing everything.

Today and Friday were showing her a very different side of Walker. He was friendly, openly enjoying the day with lots of laughter and smiles. She felt different too. She felt lighter of heart, freer of responsibilities. As they approached the summit of the trail, they paused to sit on some flat rocks that had been placed so that hikers to look out across the valley. They couldn't make out individual buildings except for the taller courthouse, but they could see the main streets and major shopping areas.

Teri opened up her pack and offered Walker a bottle of water and an energy bar. They sat there, side by side, eating and looking over the valley. A sense of peace filled the area and Teri had a fleeting thought that she wouldn't mind doing this again.

Daniel rejoiced when Teri took his offered hand. He was a little surprised by the sudden rush of excitement, substantially focused in his groin, that flooded his body when their hands touched. He was much more surprised, though, that when the trail smoothed out Teri didn’t jerk her hand back. They walked for a while hand-in-hand. No one, Daniel thought, could mistake that for anything other than a romantic gesture, small though it may be.

Sitting side-by-side with Teri on the overlook as they drank the water and ate the energy bar that she had provided felt wonderful. Daniel was beginning to actually feel a little close to Teri. Without gawking he also had another chance to take in the sight of her. God, she was so good looking. He found himself fantasizing what Teri would look like wearing the short shorts that were now almost standard issue for women who were just a few years younger than they. Daniel wasn’t sure that he could control himself were Teri to be so dressed; good thing she was wearing jeans! At that moment he was thankful that in addition to his cotton briefs his hiking shorts provided some support and restraint at the crotch; visual evidence of his partial erection would be more than a little embarrassing.

Despite his erotic stirrings what Daniel was mostly experiencing was how comfortable he felt with Teri, and how much she seemed to have relaxed. Gone entirely was the hard-as-steel woman who had battled him to a draw in their court appearances. Greatly reduced was her cool, standoffish side; Teri actually seemed to be enjoying their outing quite a lot.

The combination of his arousal and his sense that they were both feeling quite comfortable put Daniel in something of a romantic mood. As they finished their water and snack he debated what, if anything, to communicate to Teri at this moment. He had enough sense to not make any impulsive, over-the-top comment, but he couldn’t bring himself to just let the moment pass. Turning to Teri, Daniel briefly laid his hand on her jean-covered leg and said through a warm smile, “Teri, I’m having a real nice time.”

"So am I," Teri replied with surprise in her voice. She collected their empty bottles and wrappers and put them in her pack. "Shall we move on?"

The two continued along the trail, sometimes talking, sometimes just enjoying the quiet. The quiet times could have made one of them feel the need to talk, but Teri felt comfortable with Walker. More comfortable than she could ever have imagined. The hiked across a long meadow where they saw rabbits and even a doe and fawn, that took off when they caught wind of the hikers.

Suddenly, Teri grabbed Walker's arm and froze. "Look!" she said quietly pointing up at the sky. Way above the meadow, higher than the treetops, they stood still watching a golden eagle use the updrafts to float overhead. While they watched, the amazing bird, suddenly dove down quickly talons extended and just as quickly soared back up a small animal caught for lunch.

"That was amazing," whispered Teri. "I've never seen a golden eagle before." In her excitement she turned and hugged Walker.

The brief touch of Daniel's hand on Teri's jean-covered leg had been a completely spontaneous, though somewhat restrained gesture. Even as he spoke he worried that his touch may have been unwelcome, but Teri's simple, soft reply that she, too, was having a nice time calmed his fears.

Daniel liked that they walked on often in silence. In his frequent solo walks one of the things that he enjoyed most about being on the trail was how quiet and peaceful everything seemed. Even in a relatively laid back town like Silver Lake life often got pretty noisy. Further, Teri's and his apparent lack of need to fill the void with small talk reflected a growing comfort that they were having with each other.

By a few fractions of a second Teri saw the golden eagle first. Her grabbing of his arm took Daniel by surprise until he realized what was happening. He was pleased to see Teri's excitement; in that instant she seemed more spontaneously alive than Daniel had witnessed previously, more evidence that she was hardly the cold, distant, overly-serious woman that some others perceived. Even with this instantaneous new insight, however, Daniel never anticipated what happened next.

When Teri turned and hugged him Daniel's body went into overdrive. He felt on fire from head to foot. Matching her move, Daniel wrapped his arms around Teri, pulling them into a full-body hug. Her pull was soft; he held her firmly, perhaps for no more than a second or two, their heads on each others shoulders, faces pressed cheek-to-cheek. Daniel relaxed his hold, but didn't release her. As they each pulled back they stood face-to-face, still in a soft embrace. "It's been a long time since I've seen anything this beautiful," Daniel spoke softly, aware entirely of the double meaning. His own words caused Daniel's carefully tended restraint to fade to near nothingness. Sliding his arm up Teri's back to place his hand on the nape of her neck, Daniel pulled them in together, planting a firm, closed-mouth kiss directly on Teri's lips.

The warmth that had filled Daniel quickly gave way to a sudden flood of fear. What had he done? Teri had given him a hug of joy that she might otherwise have given to a girlfriend or a sibling. He had returned that with a romantic hug and an unbidden kiss. His impulsive move very well could have just killed the growing, comfortable relationship that he and Teri had been building over the last two days.

Walker's lips were firm, yet soft, and Teri responded to the kiss without thinking. It was soft and sweet. The perfect first kiss. As they both stepped back, Teri began to panic. What was going on? Why was she reacting to Walker this way? She wouldn't lie to herself, she had enjoyed the kiss, but what did it mean? Was it just a response to her impulsive hug? Was it more? If it was more, what did that mean?

She stepped back, unsure of the next move. Did she say something? Did she say nothing? Did she continue the hike? Or, was she going to stand there and say nothing and feel foolish?

"Um... should we keep going up the trail?"

She wanted to give herself a head slap. Is that it? That was what she had to say after one of the best kisses in her life? Ugh.. what a dope!

In his sudden panic, Daniel nearly overlooked the fact that Terri had responded to his kiss, softly, sweetly, with no apparent reservation. As they momentarily continued to face each other while disentangling their embrace, a smile spread across Daniel's face. He and Teri had just had their first kiss, and it was, as such things go, pretty damn good.

Um... should we keep going up the trail?

Daniel couldn't help but laugh just a little, a warm laugh, at Teri's matter-of-fact statement that completely avoided any reference to what had just happened. He momentarily considered making a wisecrack like, "Uh, no, I think we should stop and have sex in the grass,", but, luckily, his better judgment prevailed.

Daniel reached out slowly and took Teri's hand in his, "Yes, I'd like to keep going up the trail until we find a nice spot to eat the lunch that you packed for us. But, first, I think that we should take just a moment to acknowledge that we just kissed." Daniel paused for a moment, assuming that he didn't want to say any more, but then decided to amend his statement. "Uh...I should have said to acknowledge that we just had our first kiss. It was nice enough, Teri, that I hope that it won't be our last ever."

Talk about it? Acknowledge it? What on earth for? It was a kiss for heaven's sake, not a law brief! Who talked about it? Teri didn't want to talk about it, she wasn't even sure she wanted to think about it.

"Yeah, okay, it was a nice kiss," she mumbled, face flushed as she turned and began walking along the trail again. That simple impulsive hug of excitement had given Walker the idea that they would share a lot of kisses? She didn't do dates, she didn't do emotions, and she, sure as heck, didn't do talking about emotions. What was the point. Emotions were messy. They led to relationships, which led to pain, and Teri did not need or want pain.

Walker was a man. Men always tried to take advantage of situations, that was a given. Darn that eagle, anyway. Being honest with herself, she admitted it wasn't Walker's fault or the eagle's fault for all the confusing thoughts and emotions going on in her head, it was her fault. She should never have agreed to this hike in the first place. Now she still had a couple of miles to walk and a lunch to get through.

Teri continued down the trail. . All she wanted to do was get back to her car and go home. She knew Walker was behind her, knew from the way he was walking that he was confused, but she didn't know what to say to make things better. He must not have either, because the next mile was walked in silence. It was not the comfortable silence of earlier, but an awkward silence that Teri regretted.

The walk to the waterfall seemed to take forever, but eventually they got there. She set down her pack and knelt in the grass. Digging out the lunch materials, she handed Walker his sandwich, chips and cookie. She glanced up into his face as she handed him the bottle of water, and quickly looked away. The look of confusion, a senses of hurt he showed in his eyes just made Teri feel worse.

She looked at the waterfall and sighed. She felt like she had gone over the edge, her feelings all tumbling and swirling just like the water. She knew she should say something to explain her attitude, but the words wouldn't come and that just added to her misery. She wrapped up her sandwich, no longer hungry, and walked over to the edge of the gorge, her hands wrapped around her waist.

The rush of water was extremely loud, and the mist floated into her face, making her shiver. What a mess she had made of a simple date. She thought about what Beth had said, about how she twisted things up and made them more difficult than they needed to be. She thought about the idea of friendship and just having some fun. Maybe that is all the kiss had been: an expression of friendship and excitement like her hug. She owed Walker an apology. Oh joy, another thing Teri wasn't good at.

She stood there for a few moments more, letting the mist cool her down, then turned back to Walker. He was sitting there, not eating, just watching her with a slight frown on his face. Teri sighed heavily. Then she walked back over to where he was. Looking down at him, she felt that same jolt of awareness of how good looking he was. Realizing that looking at him and talking to him were not going to work, she sat down next to him where she could look over the waterfall.

"I'm sorry. I haven't been a very good companion. I got into my head and started thinking too much about," she paused, "well, about that kiss. And, well, it was silly to react the way I did and it wasn't really your fault or anything..." her voice drifted off. It was a lame apology, but it was the best she could do. She glanced at him out of the corner of her eye, unsure of what else to say.

Daniel's emotions were on a roller coaster. After his initial fear that he had screwed up by kissing Teri, his mood had elevated and his confidence had returned when he realized that she had returned his kiss. That had emboldened him to go a step farther and acknowledge that they had had their first kiss. Then came the ice storm from Teri. In his daze Daniel remembered that his good buddy and counselor on all-things-women, Jason, had once advised him that courting a woman was like comedic acting - it was all in the timing. Apparently he had blown it.

The walk to the lunch spot was torture. Before "the kiss" there seemed to be a growing comfort developing between them. Now there was just awkward silence. Teri was never hostile, but as she handed out lunch she looked as though she would rather be in the latrine at the trailhead than out here with him. Granted, she offered a weak and tortured apology after lunch for her reaction, but what was Daniel to make of a comment like "it wasn't really your fault or anything". What wasn't really his fault, that he found her attractive? That when a woman that he was on a date with hugged him, he kissed her gently? That he then had the chutzpah to say something about it? "I mean, Jesus," Daniel thought, "what was I supposed to do, pretend that it didn't happen?"

Daniel calmed his emotions just enough to not overtly react defensively or angrily. In response to Teri's contorted apology, he simply said, "That's OK, Teri", but he was too confused to do more than that. "Let's just head back," he offered quietly.

Daniel and Teri took the long trek back to the parking lot at the trailhead, saying almost nothing to each other, except for an occasional "be careful" or "there's the blaze on that tree", no hand-holding, no quiet, pleasant conversation. As they walked, however, Daniel thought a lot about Teri's reactions. It gradually dawned on him that she was scared, and that she would only be scared if her feelings toward him were at least mixed. If she were completely unattracted to him or if she found his modest advances to be entirely unwelcome or offensive, she would react either with complete indifference or tell him clearly to back off. In pondering those two possible alternative reactions, a small smile broke through Daniel's gloom. With Teri it wouldn't be indifference, she'd let him know very directly where the hell to go, and quickly. So, she was scared. She likely needed room, but maybe a little assertiveness on his part was not completely out of line either. After all, they were both lawyers.

When they reached the parking lot, they came to Teri's car first. When she turned toward him, presumably to speak, Teri looked like the proverbial deer lost in the headlights. Daniel made his move. Looking at Teri squarely, but keeping some distance, he said, "Teri, I think that you're scared. Perhaps, I have moved too fast. If so, mea culpa. But I want you to know that I am attracted to you, and I won't be driven away that easily. Now, if you truly do not wish any involvement between us, just say so at any time, and I will simply turn around and leave. I have no desire to be where I am unwelcome, but I don't think that that's what you really want right now, and I know for sure that it's not what I want. But, you may need space. So, you now have my cell number. Call me if you'd just like to have a cup of coffee, or chat, or whatever." His brief sermon done, Daniel turned toward his car, then hesitated. Turning back he took the three steps to where Teri was standing, looking as though she were in shock, slowly lowered his head, and laid a quick, very small kiss on Teri's left cheek. Quietly, he turned back, walked to his car, and drove away.

Teri wasn't quite sure how, but she managed to get herself into her car behind the wheel. With her hands covering her face, she could feel her body trembling. How dare that man accuse her of being afraid. Teri Jackson was NEVER afraid! Was she?

As she dragged her hands down her face, her fingers lingered where Walker had kissed her. What a day. She felt exhausted as she put the car in gear and headed for her apartment. Teri didn't like roller coasters: she didn't like heights and she didn't like going fast. Today felt like riding the worse roller coaster of her life. From the high of seeing the eagle to the low of the walk to the car, and every emotional stage in between.

She arrived home and shuffled up the stairs, her pack weighing a ton. As she began to take the items out, it occurred to her that she never did eat. That is it, she thought, I am tired because I need some food in my system. She pulled out a soda from the refrigerator and slowly ate the food she had gotten for the picnic. As she ate, she began to review the day.

Seeing the eagle would be something she would never forget. It was so amazing to see it soaring n the sky. She had enjoyed the earlier part of the hike. Had felt as if Walker had some things in common with her. It was a much more relaxed conversation than it had been at lunch on Friday. That had felt more like an interrogation, them each trying to come up with a superficial question to ask the other person. Today, the conversation had flowed naturally with moments when they seemed in sync and times of quiet that just felt right.

The change had come when she had impulsively hugged Walker after seeing the eagle. Then freaked when he kissed her. Why did he kiss her? Could it have been an outcome of the thrill of the eagle just as her hug had been? Or, was there something more? She thought back, as she finished her meal. She remembered the eagle, remembered her excitement, thought about how natural it had felt to throw her arms around his shoulders and hug him. His face had been filled with awe and his eyes shone with the joy of seeing the bird. Oh dear, he had been as excited as she was. So, maybe, that kiss had just come naturally as a way to share the joy they were feeling. Now that Teri had had time to consider it, it made sense. So, why, had she turned away from him angry and confused? It should have been a simple moment, one where two people shared the awe and joy of nature. Why had she turned it into a big mess? Because that was what she did: overthink things, then overreact to those thoughts.

She tossed away the trash from lunch and her pack, put the empty water bottles in the the recycling bin, and put the other items away, including the pack which she put back into her closet. Taking her soda, she sat down on the sofa and curled her legs up under her. Now that she was calm, she could see how she had taken what should have been a simple memory and ruined the day for both of them. Walker was right, she had been afraid. But of what? The goal for the day was to see if they could create a base on which to develop a friendship. Was she upset because she didn't think hugs and kisses were a part of a friendship? Maybe. Still, he hadn't really done anything wrong. He had been ... friendly. She had enjoyed walking hand in hand with him. Liked the sense of comradeship that was building between them.

She held the cool can up to her flushing cheeks. Boy had she made a mess and embarrassed herself in the process. How would she face him the next time they met over a case? The town was not big enough that she could fool herself into thinking their paths would never cross. So at some point in the next couple of months, they were bound to see each other. Maybe she could pretend not to notice him? Teri laughed at herself. Yeah, right. Like that would work.

As the room slowly darkened, as the hour grew later, she reached up to turn on a light. As she did, Walker's words, spoken at the car, came back to her. "I want you to know that I am attracted to you, and I won't be driven away that easily. Now, if you truly do not wish any involvement between us, just say so at any time, and I will simply turn around and leave. I have no desire to be where I am unwelcome, but I don't think that that's what you really want right now, and I know for sure that it's not what I want. But, you may need space. So, you now have my cell number. Call me if you'd just like to have a cup of coffee, or chat, or whatever."

So now the ball was in her court and she needed to figure out what to do with it. Her chuckle was partially humorous and partly sad. She didn't know what to do with the ball. Were they playing basketball, racquetball or tennis?

She stared out the window watching the last of the sun's light disappear. Whatever she decided, she felt an intense need to be fair to Walker. He liked her. Truthfully, she liked him. More than she wanted to, and that seemed to be Teri's problem. She liked him. It wasn't just that they had the law in common, as sometimes it felt as if Walker didn't do as much for a client as he could. Teri understood that a lawyer was bound by an oath, by law, to provide the best legal case as possible for the client. But it seemed that Walker choose to represent people that in Teri's mind were on the shady side. But, then, it turned out that Mr. Thompson had done his own shady things and she represented him. Of course, she hadn't known that when she took him on. Would it have made a difference if she had? In hindsight, it was easy to say yes, but if he had presented it to Teri as being no big deal, would she still have represented him after hearing the way his wife walked out? Probably.

The sun had set and lights from various businesses in the area were twinkling as Teri continued to sit sorting out her thoughts. Walker hadn't known the situation either. He had been as completely surprised as Teri when Mrs. Thompson had said her piece. So, he had chosen to represent the woman knowing how she had walked out on her children. Teri thought back to how Mrs. Thompson had returned the money to her children's college fund. That had to have been Walker's doing. If Mrs. Thompson had thought it through she wouldn't have taken it in the first place, as it would hurt her court case. But, Teri thought, Walker made sure the money was returned. He could have waited for the judge to demand it, but he didn't. Yes, it made senses strategically, but, somehow, Teri knew Walker had done it because it was the right thing to do.

Maybe Walker wasn't just the questionable lawyer, or just the guy who said stuff to drive her nuts, or just the guy that had too much to drink and threw hissy fits in a disposition. Maybe he was just human. Maybe he made mistakes, acted silly at times, and had poor taste in clients. It wasn't as if she was perfect. She made mistakes, used anger as a protection device, and didn't always pick perfectly innocent clients.

It was late by the time Teri had come to some conclusions. She owed Walker an apology, a better one than the mess she had given him at the waterfall. She needed to decide once and for all whether she wanted to pursue friendship with Walker or something more, then let him know. That was only fair. If he didn't want just friendship, then he had the right to choose to walk away. She looked at the clock. It was late. She had been sitting there for hours. She would call him tomorrow. She stood up, her knees popping as she straightened her legs. Too long in one place, she thought. She headed for the shower. She would get cleaned up and then get some sleep. The long walk, the emotional roller coaster, and the hours spent organizing her thoughts made falling asleep simple.

The next morning, Beth stepped into Teri's office. "How did your hike go?"

"It was pretty good at first, we saw a golden eagle!" replied Teri. "The second half of the day I messed things up. Got to inside my head and said things I shouldn't have. A typical Jackson disaster."

"Oh, Teri," sighed Beth as she took a seat,"what happened?"

Teri told her about the hug and the kiss and her reaction and what Walker had said. She told her about the long period of thinking she had done the previous night. She laid out everything for Beth to understand, including how embarrassed she had made herself.

"So, now what?" asked Beth. "Are you going to just leave it the way it is between you two or what?"

"I decided last night that I would call him this morning and arrange to get together for lunch or maybe just coffee. I need to apologize, then explain that I would like to be friends and see what he says. Then see where we go from there. I do like him, Beth, I do. I am just so worried that things will go further than I can handle."

"Further, how? That you might actually end up liking him for more than a friend? Would that be so terrible?"

"Yes, no, yes," Teri sighed. "You know I don't believe in relationships, that they never work out and there is so much pain involved when they fail, and they always do. I don't want to get hurt, I don't want to be the one that hurts him. If we don't get too close, then neither of us will get hurt."

"But, Teri," Beth said softly, "it sounds like you might have already hurt him. Are you sure friendship is the way to go? It sounds like he is attracted to you in a more than friendship way."

"Friendship is all I have to give. If he doesn't want that, so be it."

"Is it all you have to give, or are you too afraid of really feeling emotions to allow yourself to give more?" asked Beth.

"I don't know. I don't seem to know anything any more. I don't want to be hurt."

"But what, maybe, what if he doesn't hurt you or you don't hurt him? What if it works out and the two of you find out that you have something special? Isn't the possibility of a little pain better than feeling nothing at all or having no connection to a person? Maybe you will find what I have found. Maybe he will be your true love."

"Oh, Beth," laughed Teri, "You know I don't believe in true love. Although I will admit that you have me wonder about it sometimes. But I have seen too many marriages end up in divorce, people tearing each other apart, to want to go through it myself."

"You know, Teri, maybe Daniel Walker was right. Maybe you are afraid."

Teri gave her a look. "Et tu?" she said. Both women laughed and Beth went back to her office. Teri picked up the phone and sighed. She hoped she was doing the right thing. She squared her shoulders and wished she was wearing her power suit, she felt like she was going to war.

"Walker? It is Teri Jackson. I thought about everything that happened yesterday, and, if you want, I would like to get together for a cup of coffee sometime. Are you interested in doing that?"

Daniel’s calm walk to his car was a complete act. From his court appearances he had learned how to walk and move as though he were calm and self-assured, even when he was so nervous or emotional that he could hardly stand it. Turning over in his mind his gambit at the end of the day, he wasn’t sure about the wisdom of his choice. There was logic to it, and he was nearly completely convinced that his assessment of Teri’s state was accurate, but might it have been better for him to have played it cooler? He might have driven Teri over the edge to just deciding to turn away from this incipient relationship, never to turn back. On the other hand, he thought, she might do that anyway. An obvious at least partial answer to that question would be whether Terri ever called him, or if so, when. He suspected that if she did, a week or so would be the earliest that he might expect from her.

Arriving at his comfy home Daniel took a shower that he didn’t need, followed by a microwaved dinner that he didn’t want. Somehow maintaining a routine seemed to be important. Daniel realized that he would need to be patient; part of doing that was to resume “normal” life and not think constantly about Teri. He tried to read, he couldn’t concentrate. He fired up his laptop and surfed CNN and CSPAN in an effort to get interested in the upcoming Republican Convention. “That,” thought Daniel, “should be about as entertaining as watching a circus,” but after a few minutes he lost interest. Dropping his resistance to what he knew he needed to do, Daniel pulled out is iPhone and called Jason.

Jason delighted in hearing stories about romantic adventures. He teased every single detail of the last several days out of Daniel. After he had gotten the whole story and when Daniel asked him, “So, did I blow it?,” Jason replied, “No, not necessarily. I think you’re right. From what you describe, I think that she’s scared. Why? Who knows? You made your interests pretty clearly known, you suggested that she may need space, and you gave her that space by letting in up to her when, and if, to continue what you think of as your budding relationship.” Jason paused, hearing nothing coming from his friend, then continued, “But, you have to face the real possibility that if she wants anything, it is strictly friendship. So, Daniel, what you need to do next is to decide if you would want to have a platonic friendship with Teri.”

Daniel thought for a moment, “Based on what I’ve said, do you think that’s possible?”

Jason, though not a lawyer, started with the affirmative case, “Well, you do seem to have a fair amount in common. Apparently, you both really like to go for hikes. Before the big tense moment surrounding your kiss, you seemed to be having quite a nice, low-keyed time with her, and you think that she was experiencing the same.” Jason laughed a bit, “and, from my one visit to that hick town that you moved to I’m sure that both you and Teri are each the smartest person in the room, except for those occasions when both of you are in the same room simultaneously. So, there’s a lot to build a friendship on. And, I might point out, you don’t seem to have any friends to speak of up there.”

Daniel began to consider the possibility of Teri as just a friend. It seemed better than simply being cut off entirely, and, given his present mood, seemed like something optimistic. “You know, Jason, that seems worth considering. Yeah, maybe we could be friends if that’s what Teri wants.”

“Except,” Jason exclaimed, “it won’t work.”

“Why not?,” Daniel was confused by his friend’s apparent about face.

“Because,” Jason began, “there’s two problems with that. The first one should be obvious even to you. You really want to get into her pants. I mean, let’s face it, you want to fuck her until you both scream in ecstasy.”

Even with his emotions running high, Daniel couldn’t help but chuckle. How he had ever kept as one of his best friends in both high school and college, Jason, with his typically coarse and blunt language, the antithesis of himself, was almost unimaginable. But, he cherished the guy nonetheless. “Damn it, Jason, I am not just looking for hookup. I’m attracted to Teri as a whole person. I mean, yes, sex would be a part of the whole thing if we became a couple, but…”

Jason snorted, laughing, “Well...at least I got you to say ‘sex’. I never meant to say that you just wanted to get laid, I’m just pointing out that your goal isn’t to get a partner to play chess with. Now, there must be some other eligible women up there, no? Some young, horny teachers or nurses, or such? So, in principle, at least, if you got a girlfriend who liked to regularly slam her body into yours, you and Teri might be able to be casual friends, occasionally going for short walks or having lunch together. Teri would, no doubt, still look awfully good to you, but you’d be getting your dipstick wet elsewhere, so the tension might be lower.”

“Absent your crass view of lovemaking, you probably have a point. Yeah, maybe I should consider looking for a girlfriend elsewhere, and just see if Teri and I could be buddies.” Daniel was surprised by his own comment, but there was logic to Jason’s observations.

“Yeah,” replied Jason,” but there’s the second problem, and it’s a big one.”

“And, what’s that?”

“It’s a really big one.”

“Stop it! What’s the damn problem?”

“I mean, my friend, a really serious, knockout problem.”

“For Chrissake, Jason, what’s the fucking problem?,” Daniel yelled, lapsing atypically into vulgarity.

Jason paused, “Well, Danny boy…you’re in love.”

Daniel ended his counseling call with his best friend feeling, if anything, sicker than before. Jason, of course, always overstated everything. He did it for effect, but Daniel knew that there was a kernel of truth there. He had allowed himself to fantasize that he and Teri were on the road, albeit slowly, to a love affair, not merely a casual date now and then. And shit, Teri at most probably wanted to be buddies, and likely not even that.

Before they ended their call Jason had agreed with Daniel that if Teri ever responded to his open invitation to call him that it would likely be a couple of weeks in the future. A relatively quick call, Jason opined, would signal that Teri had more than a passing interest in him, even if she didn’t know it herself. Daniel went to bed committed to the idea that he needed to move on, think less about Teri, and get back to what passed as his normal life in Silver Lake.

Daniel awoke the next morning, showered, and ate his oatmeal breakfast. He normally started his bike trip to work at about 7:30, but today he was still too anxious to be in a hurry. It was already 8:30 when he strapped on his shoulder pack and began to put on his biking helmet. His phone rang. “Probably the office,” he thought, “I’m sure that I didn’t have an appointment, but they probably wonder where I am.” Daniel glanced at his cellphone, and nearly fell over. Teri! Calling about 14 hours after they parted in the parking lot. Daniel’s emotions took another flip flop. Hmm…maybe hope is still very much alive!

Walker? It is Teri Jackson. I thought about everything that happened yesterday, and, if you want, I would like to get together for a cup of coffee sometime. Are you interested in doing that?

“Sure, Teri,” Daniel said, trying to sound nonchalant, “just name the day, time, and place, and I’ll be there.”

"Oh, um," Teri faltered. She hadn't expected him to throw the decision making back on her. "Um.. would Thursday at four at the coffee shop near the courthouse be okay?" She didn't want too seem to anxious and yet she really wanted to get the apology over and done with, she hated apologizing for her stupid emotions going crazy. "You probably need to check your calendar, so..um.. why don't you get back to me when you know?" There was a pause on the line and Teri didn't know what else to say, so she hung up. He had flustered her and she hated sounding like a flaky female, when she normally wasn't. She wished Walker didn't have that effect on her, it was like the zap she got when they touched, frustrating.

Now that the phone call was over, Teri needed to focus on her job. What she needed was a load of paperwork to keep her mind occupied, unfortunately, she had finished up with her caseload last week. She decided she would read the newest copy of "The Family Lawyer Magazine" to see if any articles were worth reading.

There was one article about something called a "No-Nup" which was similar to a pre-nuptial agreement but for people living together. Unlike the Common Law Marriage agreements, this one could be for any period of time and was a protection of previous owned assets and those obtained while co-habitating. It made for interesting reading as it affected not only the people co-habitating but any children that may occur or be adopted during that period. It was especially important in same sex partnerships in places where marriage was not accepted. Teri made copies of the article to give to Beth and Patty, and placed one copy in her files. She sent an email to the state general attorney's office to find out the legalities of this process and to get copies of any paperwork that was involved.

When she finished, a social worker, came by to discuss a case involving two small children. Social Services was one of Teri's clients, and she often made recommendations for the workers regarding the possible consequences of actions they wanted to take before the case was brought before the judge. Teri would then act as legal counsel for Social Services during the hearing. This particular case involved parents leaving two toddlers alone in the car with the windows up. Although the temperatures hadn't been that high the inside of the car was much hotter. A shopper had noticed the children crying and broke the car window to get air to the children. An ambulance had taken the children to the hospital and Children's Social Services was called in. The children were suffering from heat rash and dehydration but were otherwise fine. The parents had been arrested for neglect. As Teri and the social worker went over the details, Teri took notes and asked questions. By the time the two of them were finished it was after lunch and Teri munched on a sandwich she had brought down with her earlier as she filled out the paperwork necessary to take the case to court. She didn't like cases involving children, but she took satisfaction in doing her best to protect the children.

It was late afternoon by the time she handed off the file to Patty to send to the courthouse. She waved to Beth who was busy with her own client and headed upstairs. She nuked some of the lasagna she had frozen last week and settled in to watch an old movie on the television. Teri liked the movies on Turner Movie Classics as she felt that the actors and actresses did a much better job of acting than the current load of actors did. She started to think about Walker, but pushed thoughts of him to the back of her mind. She didn't need to think about him until later in the week and she didn't plan on expending any mental or emotional energy on freaking out about something when she couldn't do anything until Thursday.

Despite her efforts and the "Thin Man" movie she was watching, it wasn't long before the scene on the television faded and Walker's face appeared in her mind. What should she do? Should she push for friendship? Let go of her fears and see where that led her? Would Walker even want to see her again after her melt down? Why was she thinking of him when she couldn't make up her mind until she saw him again and knew what he wanted? But he said what he wanted. In fact, he was pretty clear about it. He wanted her. Why? Maybe that was the real question, why did Walker want her.

Teri knew she was okay looking, no one screamed when they saw her. She kept fit with her hiking and skiing, She didn't go to the gym every day like some people but she had been blessed with a good metabolism and as long as she watched what she ate she seemed to stay around the same weight. Her features were even and a combination of her parents' genes, and she was lucky that both of her parents were good looking. Her mother had been a model in her earlier years and worked hard at keeping the same figure she had had as a young woman. In fact, that had been part of the problem between her parents, they were both too self-centered to really focus on anyone else. Still the divorce had been painful for the children as her parents had somehow managed to hide their lack of interest in each other. It was only after the divorce that Teri could look back and see small cracks in their attempts to keep the family together for the children's sake facade.

So Teri was okay looking, had a good job, was independent, but so were a lot of women. But, Teri realized, not many of them were around her age. There were a few teachers, one or two nurses and a doctor, a policewoman that was a couple of years younger, and .. who else? There had to be more, Teri just didn't know them. It wasn't like she knew everyone in town. But, truthfully, most women in their late 20s or early 30s, like Teri, were either married or gay. Maybe that was what Walker saw in her, availability in her age group.

But, thought Teri, at least that was something on his pro side. He wasn't after the community college set. He could find lots of girls there. It said something good about Walker that he wasn't chasing after those girls. The more Teri contemplated what she knew about Walker, the more she realized that he was a pretty decent man. Maybe that was why she felt that attraction to him? Maybe, instinctively, she recognized that about him? Except for the one day when he did his own melt down in the conference room followed by his ridiculous drunk phone call, she couldn't say that she had ever seen or heard of him doing anything really stupid or overly chauvinistic. And if one looked at his judgement calls in the courtroom, those times when she felt he could have pushed harder for his clients, in retrospect, his moves had been about doing the right thing, not necessarily cutting throats to get the win. Not that Walker didn't love to win and then crow about it, but still, maybe she had been seeing him in a wrong light all this time.

Teri turned off the tv and stood up. She shook her head. Maybe she was nuts and he was exactly like she had pegged him when she first met him. She didn't have a good answer and she was tired. She would figure out that 'Case of Mr. Walker' another day. She was heading for bed.

The next couple of days were pretty much the same. Teri met with a new client that wanted to adopt his wife's son and needed to know what the steps were the family needed to do. She went to court regarding the children left in the car. The judge fined the parents and gave them community service for three months, plus assigned CCS to mentor the family for the next six months. The couple were very young, and had no idea of the danger their children had faced. Teri was satisfied with the decision, but made a note to keep in touch with CCS and make sure the parents were following through. Each night she vowed she would not think of Walker and each night she thought of him.

By Wednesday night, she had spent so much time going back and forth about Walker's worth as a human being, that she literally had nothing left she could bring to her mental table. At this point, Teri decided, what happens, happens.

Thursday, she spent the day finishing up some paperwork for the judge and CSS. At 3:00, Beth stopped by to wish her good luck. Teri knew she would need it. She needed all the armor she could get to make it through this meeting. She would not call it a date, it was a meeting over coffee. That's all. She hadn't even bothered to dress up, or rather she had spent too much time last night deciding not to dress up. She had chosen a pair of while slacks, a blue blouse and heels since she going to be at work. She wasn't going to go upstairs and change, this was a casual meeting for coffee. Just coffee. It was about her apology and to see if she could get a handle on what she wanted. As she walked down the street toward the courthouse, she repeated softly, “Just coffee, no big deal, just say what you need to say and be done with it.”

It occurred to her just as she was getting to the coffeeshop, that Walker hadn't called her back. She had spent the whole week thinking this out, and she didn't even know if he would be here. She started to laugh. Well, she might as well get a cup of coffee while she was there. What a dope she was!

You probably need to check your calendar, so..um.. why don't you get back to me when you know?

Daniel paused to quickly check his calendar, requiring him to momentarily switch modes on his cellphone. Returning to phone mode, he replied, "sure, Thursday at 4:00 at the coffee shop would be fine. See you there." He didn't hear a reply from Teri, but his phone indicated that the line was open when he spoke, so he assumed that she must have gotten the message.

Working on the "give her space" theory, with great difficulty Daniel resisted calling or texting Teri prior to their coffee date. He realized that it wasn't a "date" in the sense that he thought of their other two times together, but it was hard for him to keep that in mind. It was impossible for him to keep thoughts of Teri out of his mind. He thought of little else during the days leading up to their get together. Daniel had calmed himself down enough to get some routine work done, but that was about it.

It was summer. Daniel decided on Thursday to dress as casually as he could get away with and still be in the office. He sported a polo shirt atop a pair of cotton chinos. Deliberately, Daniel arrived early at the coffee shop so that he would be there first to snag a table in the more private corner of the room. He was determined to play it cool, and see where Teri was coming from. Proverbially, the ball was in her court.

When he spotted Teri walking through the door, dressed more casually than usual, a warm feeling washed over him. "Damn Jason, " Daniel thought, "I am not in some adolescent love with this woman." He knew, though, that that was only partly true. After Teri ordered and picked up her coffee, Daniel stood, hailing Teri with his outstretched arm. As she approached, he motioned her to the other seat at his table with a warm smile. "Hi, Teri," he said, trying to project a friendly, non-intimidating posture, "how are you this fine afternoon?"

The next move, Teri's "opening summary", Daniel knew, would very likely set the course for the rest of their "relationship", or whatever their future interactions were going to be.

Teri was nervous, but she tried to hide it by pasting on a smile and taking a seat. As she leaned forward to speak, she hoped he wouldn't notice that she wiped her damp palms on her pants.

“Thank you for coming. I wanted to apologize for ruining our hike with my silly behavior. I am not sure what got into me. I got super excited about seeing the eagle. It was such an amazing sight.” Teri paused, remembering the thrill of the magnificent bird soaring through the sky. “I've never seen anything like it. I lost my head. Then when you responded, in what was a perfectly normal way,” she went on to reassure him, “I overreacted. Then I got all up in my head and ruined what was a wonderful day.” She paused, trying to read his reaction. “Anyway, I am sorry and I just wanted to meet to tell you that.” She fell silent unsure of what she should do or say next.

At his best Daniel was very quick thinking on his feet. Teri hadn't given him much. How to respond? "Don't push her; giver her room," his inner voice told him, "but, don't let her get entirely away with a belief that you are interested in her only as a platonic friend".

Daniel paused just long enough to appear to be calm, "Teri, I don't really think that you have anything to apologize for. However, I accept your 'apology' in the gracious and sincere way that you have offered it. It is I, perhaps, who owe you an apology. It was clear that sighting the eagle was really exciting for you, and, yes, it was a beautiful sight, and that your spontaneous hug was an expression of that joy. I kissed you impulsively, giving you a kiss that was uninvited and, likely, unwelcome. I should have been more sensitive."

Having acknowledged his bad timing and apologizing for it, Daniel let the other shoe drop, although dropping it very gently. "Feeling you so close and with your arms wrapped around me, given my attraction to you, I failed to control my impulses. I shall endeavor to be more careful in the future."

Luckily for Teri, the waitress came for their order at that moment. She really needed the time to figure out what to do or say next. She couldn't deny the burst of joy that happened when Walker said he was attracted to her, but it also scared her a little also. The problem was she needed to be fair to Walker and the only way to do that was to be honest and admit why she was afraid.

"I need to tell you something. To explain why I am so leery of dating.. of relationships." She went on to explain her parents marriage and divorce and how that affected her dating life when she was younger. Teri's hands were wrapped up in a napkin, she had no idea how they had ended up there, but she kept her eyes focused on her fingers. "There was one man, Steve, that I thought, maybe, that I might fall in love with, but I got scared and pushed him away. I am afraid to commit to any relationships, so, I think, that is why I reacted the way I did on Sunday."

Teri's voice was soft as she glanced up to see Walker's attention focused on her. She forced herself to put down the napkin. She folded her hands on the table and straightened her shoulders. If she was going to be honest, and she was determined to do so, then she needed to be totally honest with him. "I am attracted to you, also. But, I honestly don't know if I can even do friendship," she hesitated, glancing up at his face again, "but I would like to try."

Daniel had started to eat his sandwich as Teri began her explanation. After just a few bites he stopped eating, his attention riveted on her story. Her story echoed his in several ways, yet was also meaningfully different. He was moved by her honesty and self-disclosure.

I am attracted to you, also. But, I honestly don't know if I can even do friendship...

Daniel's emotions went through one of the fastest flips he had ever experienced. Teri was attracted to him also! He was never clear before as to whether she was or not. Then came her disclaimer, causing his emotions to crash as fast as they had just rose. How long would it take him before he could get past the irony that Teri was attracted to him, but even friendship might not be possible?

but I would like to try.

Daniel could feel a lump growing in his throat as well as joy returning. Good thing that he had practiced impulse control; otherwise he might have impulsively kissed her again. He realized in a flash that he now needed to self-disclose as well, but first he needed to respond to her statement. Taking a risk of pushing too hard, Daniel softly laid his hand briefly on Teri's as he said, "then, we shall try."

Daniel told Teri of his own parents' divorce, and how it similarly made him cynical about relationships. He acknowledged, though, that he had had several short-term, casual dating relationships. He didn't specifically mention that they included sex, but he made oblique references that he thought would make that clear. He also told her how he had fallen in love with Jill, gotten married, and, initially, how happy he was with being a married man, and, specifically, being married to Jill.

Then came the difficult decision. What to tell Teri about his divorce? Daniel looked at his watch. They had already been in the coffee shop for 45 minutes. He told Teri that he wanted to explain to her about his divorce from Jill, but he realized that they had already been here for some time. He asked her if she was willing to stay for that explanation. A quiet nod from Teri gave her answer. Daniel decided to just be forthcoming. He told her that, effectively, he had “walked out” of their marriage, but he also told her about how suffocating the life had become that Jill was so dedicated to, how he had tried through short trips to interest Jill in life in small-town America with all of the access to the outdoors and the slower pace of life, and how Jill never budged on her insistence that they live the young, urban, career-focused, power couple lifestyle. Daniel emphasized that he and Jill had no children, and that how, after Jill’s initial, understandable anger, their divorce had been quite amicable, that, in fact, they still sent birthday and holiday greetings to each other. He admitted, though, that he knew that he had hurt Jill, and that he would always carry some pain and guilt about that. He also told Teri that the Thompson case had hit him emotionally rather hard, and that he didn’t approve of Susan Thompson’s essential abandonment of her children.

Having made his own confession, Daniel slumped back in his seat, exhausted. He had just laid a lot on Teri, including admitting that he had walked out of his marriage. “What the hell, though,” Daniel thought, “might as well see how much damage I have done. “So, Teri,” he said softly, “after all of that, do you still want to try having me as a friend?”

"What a pair we are," said Teri shaking her head. "It is amazing how messed up people can be. I can't imagine what those Thompson kids are going through. Thank goodness they are getting counseling. All I can say is that, I don't care how many people come through the door, it is going to be a while before I take another divorce case!" Then she grinned wryly, "Or, until the bank insists on needing more money."

As they both laughed, Teri felt relieved. Walker was being open and, as far as she could tell, honest about his past. She was open about hers. Honesty was one of Teri's must dos in life.

She turned her hand over so that his palm laid against hers. "Thank you for sharing your past with me. Being honest is extremely important to me. I would have been hurt if I had found out about your previous marriage from someone else. I must say, this being open and sharing sure is exhausting."

She stood up and dropped a bill on the table, which was more than enough for her coffee and Walker's lunch, after all she had invited him. Then held out her hand. "So, friend, do you want to walk me back to my office?"

Honest sharing, Daniel had to admit, was exhausting, but he realized that it was what they both had to do if there was any hope of going forward. They had taken an important step. What gave him joy, though, was that they had laughed. True, the laughter was just in response to a silly quip that Teri made about having to work for money, but it offered the promise that they could have a relationship of some sort that didn't have to be deadly serious at every moment.

So, friend, do you want to walk me back to my office?

Daniel felt light-hearted. And, things were light enough that he thought that he could afford a little teasing. "Sure, I'd be glad to, friend, but when we're outside you can't touch my hand like you just did. I mean, what would the people of Silver Lake think? They might get the wrong idea that we are more than just good buddies." In response to his own quip, he broke out into a big grin. As she turned to look at him, Daniel Walker caught Teri Jackson's gaze straight on...and winked.

As they walked out the door, Teri was caught off guard. Yes, Walker had winked when he wondered what the people of the town would say if they saw them walking hand in hand. But he was right. What would they think? Would there be ten calls waiting for her when she got back to the office asking for information? Would people wonder if they were seeing each other, even as friends, if it would affect they ability to do their jobs? Suddenly, she wasn't sure if this was the right path to take. Oh, all these questions rolling around in her head were making her crazy and Walker was looking at her wondering why she had stopped halfway out the door.

"I am sure the gossip mills will be running rampant if they haven't been already," she replied seriously. "I hadn't considered that. What if people think we can't do our jobs when we come up against each other in cases? This is a small town, we can't just hope that our cases don't cross, we both know that they will. So what happens then?"

Teri stepped out of the doorway to let someone else go in, but as she walked down the street slowly, her hands at her sides, she began to wonder if they weren't creating a bigger hassle than either of them could handle.

Daniel had a passing moment of irritation, and of concern. Interacting with Teri was like walking on eggshells. It seemed like almost anything that he said might throw her back into a sea of worry. He realized, however, that the trick for him was to not get caught up in Teri's fears, but to either counter them or offer a less fearful alternative.

"Teri, I was making a joke, or, at least, trying to. I have to learn to not appear to make fun of what might be a legitimate concern. That said, if we can't be friends because some wags out there decide to make a big deal of it, then there's no hope. And, I don't mean no hope just for our friendship, I mean there's no hope for either of us living in this town that we've chosen and both really like. I don't want to think that I have to worry that every action that I take will be scrutinized by the townspeople as though I were the accused."

Daniel paused, he feared that he was on the verge of making an unempathic, self-serving sermon. He needed to recognize her fear. "I don't mean to minimize your concern; I know that it's genuine and heartfelt. Talk to Beth about it. My sense is that she's a very understanding and level-headed person."

They walked on in silence for about half a block as they approached Teri's office. Trying to sound as confident and warm as he could, Daniel said, "Oh, Teri, and thanks for the invitation to walk you back to your office. It really made me feel good that you felt comfortable enough to ask me. Even if you now have a concern, it was the thought that counted; and, it was a nice thought."

Teri hit her forehead with the palm of her hand. She had done it again. Gotten into her head and made a mess of it. "I am sorry. I didn't mean to make things strange or difficult. It was just that I hadn't thought that out, facing each other across the courtroom and how it could be awkward. As you can tell I get into my head and freak myself out easily. This is new to me so I feel anxious and awkward. I haven't been with anyone in years and I am going to drive you crazy. I don't mean to run hot and cold, and if I am, just tell me so I can stop."

She smiled at him, "Are you sure you want to take on an emotional head case?" She went into the building, turning to wave at Walker. She checked to see if Beth was alone, then took a seat.

"What happened?" asked Beth. " You look like you were run over."

"I am a mess," moaned Teri. "Even Walker said I am blowing hot and cold. I start off just fine, but then I get a thought and it takes over my mind and I say it out loud and... " she sighed. "I am a mess."

"What, exactly, happened?"

"We were sharing some of our past relationships and how they affected our ideas about relationships. I told him about my parents and he told me how he had been married. It was good. It was honest. I felt good."

"What happened?" repeated Beth exasperatedly.

"He said something about the people in town talking about the two of us being friends and I think he was kidding, but I got to worrying about facing him across the courtroom. I got all freaked out wondering if people would think we weren't doing our jobs, if they knew we were spending time together outside of the courtroom.
And then..," Teri paused to catch her breath.

"And then WHAT?" shrieked Beth.

"And then I said something about my thoughts and he got exasperated and said I should talk to you. He said you were level-headed."

"Me, level-headed? You are the one that is level-headed." Beth was confused.

"I know," moaned Teri. "but he thinks, and rightfully so, that I am a basket case."

"Did he say that exactly?"

"No, but I am."

"Geez, Teri, he knows you don't do relationships, knows you get into your head and freak out, knows you are a basket case, AND he still wants to see you?" Beth said in awe.

"I know," responded Teri. "Is that a good thing or is he nuts? Maybe I shouldn't see him again. Anyone that is willing to put up with all that must have a screw loose." she giggled.

Beth shook her head slowly. "This is either going to be really good or a complete disaster. I am glad I have a front seat."

"Thanks, loads," Teri muttered as she stood up and headed for her office. She sort of wished she was watching from the sidelines also. She had a feeling that Walker might decided living in the city would be better than living with a nutcase in this town.

She picked up the phone and called Walker. When he answered she said, "Beth agrees with you. I am a nutcase. Now that we all agree, what next? Do you want to take on this mess, are you still interested in trying to be friends, or is this too much to deal with?"