Go Back   Literotica Discussion Board > Main Literotica Forums > Poetry Feedback & Discussion

Reply
 
Thread Tools

Old 08-14-2013, 12:43 PM   #26
UnderYourSpell
Gerund Whore
 
UnderYourSpell's Avatar
 
UnderYourSpell is offline
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Somewhere over the rainbow
Posts: 14,769
Still working my way through todays poems but even before I get to the end have to mention Domestic Bliss by Tristesse and Tomatoz, Pepperz, and Butter Beanz by HarryHill both have raised a smile when I really need one
__________________
Blessed are the cracked for it is they that let in the light
They say a smile is a gift which is free to the giver and precious to the recipient.
But giving the finger is free, too, and I find it more personal and sincere.
If at first you don't succeed....skydiving is not for you ....
If you don't pay your exorcist .... do you get repossessed?
I shall always decide not to decide, unless of course I decide to change my mind.
....But I, being poor, have only my dreams, I have spread my dreams under your feet,Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.......
Nil Caborundum illigitimi
Sestina slut
Annie submits
  Reply With Quote

Old 08-15-2013, 04:07 PM   #27
Angeline
Poet Chick
 
Angeline's Avatar
 
Angeline is offline
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Jazzonia
Posts: 25,925
8/15/14

There are some great submissions in new poems today, including my recommendations: those from wakingDown, UnderYourSpell, SusanSnow, OpenField and a wonderfully satirical sonnet from a poet called grammaticus.

And Ashesh9 likes reading our comments so go read and leave some!
__________________
Terry

Poems
  Reply With Quote

Old 08-16-2013, 04:39 PM   #28
HarryHill
Just Chilling
 
HarryHill's Avatar
 
HarryHill is offline
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: 7 miles from Backwater
Posts: 8,041
The Black Dress by M_P made me glad all my ex's things have long gone to good will. yet, I'm still haunted by a handkerchief
__________________

Voyages II < finished at last

0 days accident free


"I'll never be a poet" - The Harry
  Reply With Quote

Old 08-16-2013, 04:44 PM   #29
Angeline
Poet Chick
 
Angeline's Avatar
 
Angeline is offline
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Jazzonia
Posts: 25,925
Agreed. My favorite of the day and agreed with your comment about the length. It would be a great Halloween poem, I thought. It also reminded me a bit of the Dr. Seuss story/poem about the scary pants with nobody inside them.
__________________
Terry

Poems
  Reply With Quote

Old 08-18-2013, 09:56 AM   #30
HarryHill
Just Chilling
 
HarryHill's Avatar
 
HarryHill is offline
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: 7 miles from Backwater
Posts: 8,041
Read 'em ALL
__________________

Voyages II < finished at last

0 days accident free


"I'll never be a poet" - The Harry
  Reply With Quote

Old 08-20-2013, 12:06 AM   #31
wakingDown
Really Experienced
 
wakingDown's Avatar
 
wakingDown is offline
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: At the bottom
Posts: 250
Simple by Friend2Pin
I enjoyed this one. A wandering and lightly vague musing that worked well with the subject of love.

I tried to make a link but the damned thing wasn't working. Sorry.

Last edited by wakingDown : 08-20-2013 at 12:10 AM.
  Reply With Quote

Old 08-20-2013, 12:15 AM   #32
Neonurotic
Share some skin
 
Neonurotic's Avatar
 
Neonurotic is offline
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Venice of Japan
Posts: 1,382
Quote:
Originally Posted by wakingDown View Post
Simple by Friend2Pin
I enjoyed this one. A wandering and lightly vague musing that worked well with the subject of love.

I tried to make a link but the damned thing wasn't working. Sorry.
I agree
and here ya go: Simple by Friend2Pin.
__________________
Neo Classic Subs
  Reply With Quote

Old 08-20-2013, 05:55 PM   #33
twelveoone
ground zero
 
twelveoone is offline
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 5,882
Two.
because I'm a prick

Homo Erectus
by some guy named Harry

keep this in mind:
as promised with the thought that this could also be titled poetic evolution.

and also tell me if this asshole doesn't have an agenda
WHICH PROVES ERECTUS WAS 1ST

before sapient savant, TK U MLJ LV NV

really tazz
a more sapient reading of this, would be as a literary critique of excessive tendencies of...not just him, in other words things that have already been said as comments, now erectus123 has taken it with good sport, and if anyone has evolved with his writing he could easlily be a poster boy. i.e. he was good, he got better, fast.

and
B-roads/M20/M25/A1/B-roads
byfridayam©
an Odyssey of sorts
with a trick ending which escapes the literary lite (i.e. me)
  Reply With Quote

Old 08-21-2013, 10:42 AM   #34
twelveoone
ground zero
 
twelveoone is offline
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 5,882
I like a guy who experiments

wakingDown
a variation of a structure a bridge between the blocks

Blackout

when
oneiria hits it, he hits it, well ouch

The Apian Way

now in answer to a question about internal alignment, forget some of that bullshit that may have been drilled into your heads, there is a very strong set of twos in operation here, interlocked and frustrated, i.e. what you are supposed to do in the penti, but this is sounds in words not syllables.

Harmageddon
byfridayam©

first follow the l's and then the b's, there are others

this is just my opinion, but I do leave comments with specifics, because WTF I'm a technician, and at the low end of the touchy feely spectrum.
  Reply With Quote

Old 08-23-2013, 05:36 PM   #35
HarryHill
Just Chilling
 
HarryHill's Avatar
 
HarryHill is offline
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: 7 miles from Backwater
Posts: 8,041
Only three today Surely you can read three.
__________________

Voyages II < finished at last

0 days accident free


"I'll never be a poet" - The Harry
  Reply With Quote

Old 08-25-2013, 09:12 AM   #36
HarryHill
Just Chilling
 
HarryHill's Avatar
 
HarryHill is offline
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: 7 miles from Backwater
Posts: 8,041
Twenty-eight NEW POEMS today you may be hard pressed to find ONE favorite. I've skimmed half of them. a very good day in NP.
__________________

Voyages II < finished at last

0 days accident free


"I'll never be a poet" - The Harry
  Reply With Quote

Old 08-25-2013, 03:39 PM   #37
twelveoone
ground zero
 
twelveoone is offline
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 5,882
this stands out, true I did not read them all
Mythomyopeia
byfridayam©

Why, it is a thought out and crafted piece.

Demure is back, but I don't understand the multiple submissions
and mr.e and ashes seem to be 'avin a bit o'fun with someone they think is Simon Cruel
or jockeying for popularity and/or sympathy in which case pathetic.
numbers don't mean much, boys
so consider the title mr.e, I like the old west, and you forget who you owe don't you?
  Reply With Quote

Old 08-26-2013, 11:51 AM   #38
EducatedOwl
Really Really Experienced
 
EducatedOwl's Avatar
 
EducatedOwl is offline
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: The Northwest Tower
Posts: 367
I liked Her_Toyboy's "Longing and Belonging". I took it as an artful exploration of cybersex, but I'll leave it to the poet to explain his meaning for himself (or not).
__________________
My submissions on Literotica: EducatedOwl
  Reply With Quote

Old 08-26-2013, 06:56 PM   #39
greenmountaineer
Literotica Guru
 
greenmountaineer is offline
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 2,367
Loss by Remec, I think, is outstanding.
  Reply With Quote

Old 08-27-2013, 11:53 PM   #40
EducatedOwl
Really Really Experienced
 
EducatedOwl's Avatar
 
EducatedOwl is offline
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: The Northwest Tower
Posts: 367
I thoroguhly enjoyed Tristesse2's Black and White Porn in all its graphic, smutty glory.

Erectus123's Wake Me! was a lot of fun and made good use of a large cast of characters.
__________________
My submissions on Literotica: EducatedOwl
  Reply With Quote

Old 08-28-2013, 10:52 AM   #41
twelveoone
ground zero
 
twelveoone is offline
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 5,882
Question, what is poetry? Think it may have something to do with higher order word choice, not only in the words themselves but how they interact with each other?
So we round up the usual suspects:

Two by byTristesse2

Bellocq

He may have hidden
his misshapen ugliness,
his longing behind the lens,
lusting as he stood shrouded

Black 'n White Porn
not much of a plot, but then porn is not noted for that, neither is poetry per se. And this is poetry, not porn, there is a difference, most notably lack of cliche. Don't believe me. Take a look.

ps. I saw the third.

seannelson is always interesting, his
a poem for the dysmorphic
sinks a little for me, not sure why, maybe I'm not in the mood.

Wine with Waterhttp://www.literotica.com/p/wine-with-water
byfridayam
may be the best, or trying with "bellocq", may not be to your taste and that is fine, but I am talking words here.

Lastly,
erectus123 writes more to the prose end than poetry, however good prose tops boring poetry and these two are well worth a look

Face Fuck Book # 148--Dr. Yahudi

and

Wake Me!http://www.literotica.com/p/wake-me-3

curiously I did not see the anon nor taz, now aren't you all glad I quit writing? yay!
  Reply With Quote

Old 08-30-2013, 12:24 PM   #42
Angeline
Poet Chick
 
Angeline's Avatar
 
Angeline is offline
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Jazzonia
Posts: 25,925
8/30/13

Scruples #2, posted yesterday by demure101 is lovely flowy writing.
__________________
Terry

Poems
  Reply With Quote

Old 09-01-2013, 06:28 PM   #43
Remec
Master Glomper
 
Remec's Avatar
 
Remec is offline
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Virginia Beach
Posts: 8,299
9/1/2013

I had some time and read through what had posted today (so far) and would definitely recommend reading most of them, but this one I especially liked.

__________________
My Stuff
AH Directory



"I have set my life upon a cast, and I shall stand the hazard of the die." -- Richard III

"Watch out for this guy! He's slick! And dark... and mysterious... and maybe even a bit evil! But in a totally sexy way!" -- BooMerengue
  Reply With Quote

Old 09-05-2013, 11:15 AM   #44
twelveoone
ground zero
 
twelveoone is offline
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 5,882
i know nobody is paying attention...

Young Love
bysusansnow©
who is good at that sort of thing
really does a wonder here.

face to felt.
Brain seizing; shitting


operative word is twos, but also takes a straight line and shakes it like a pit bull.

and it is short, allowing for my short attention span and time to recommend. H worthy, I think.
  Reply With Quote

Old 09-19-2013, 06:15 AM   #45
todski28
Literotica Guru
 
todski28 is offline
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 2,544
just thought Id dust this off

http://www.literotica.com/p/lion-in-an-iron-cage

a good first poem in my opinion, all the things I am trying to do in my work at the moment, assonance, alliteration and a little internal rhyme, maybe why I like it

tristess2 has put out some stellar pieces

http://www.literotica.com/p/fecundity
http://www.literotica.com/p/dirty-dancing-4

Underyourspell continues with her cheeky fun

http://www.literotica.com/p/i-wish-i-was-an-aardvark

onieria does it again funny for me

http://www.literotica.com/p/fractional-samadhi
  Reply With Quote

Old 09-25-2013, 02:56 PM   #46
GuiltyPleasure
AWTSS
 
GuiltyPleasure's Avatar
 
GuiltyPleasure is offline
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: eyes on the prize
Posts: 14,084
This is more a "heads-up" than a recommendation. theoncomingstorm has been both prolific and popular - check it out here .
  Reply With Quote

Old 10-10-2013, 02:26 AM   #47
todski28
Literotica Guru
 
todski28 is offline
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 2,544
http://www.literotica.com/p/half-ful...-verre-de-amor

This for me was very well written, any one else care to read please do
  Reply With Quote

Old 10-19-2013, 01:41 PM   #48
Angeline
Poet Chick
 
Angeline's Avatar
 
Angeline is offline
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Jazzonia
Posts: 25,925
10-19-13

Whispered kisses across my skin is a really good erotic poem because it's so simple and direct.
__________________
Terry

Poems
  Reply With Quote

Old 10-21-2013, 03:52 AM   #49
todski28
Literotica Guru
 
todski28 is offline
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 2,544
do yourself a favour, read this!!!

http://www.literotica.com/p/the-artists-daughter

beautiful Tristesse, loved it in the 2013 poem a week
  Reply With Quote

Old 10-21-2013, 07:08 AM   #50
greenmountaineer
Literotica Guru
 
greenmountaineer is offline
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 2,367
I thought "A black woman speaks of her bottom" by LeEIIan was exceptional. It was her first submission to Literotica. I hope she visits more.
  Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 04:33 PM.

Copyright 1998-2013 Literotica Online. Literotica is a registered trademark.