What Old People Think About Gay Sex

Bramblethorn said:

Video: old people give their thoughts on gay sex.

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...about WHAT?

stickygirl said:

...about WHAT?

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Without spoilers, I think most here would enjoy it

Bramblethorn said:

Video: old people give their thoughts on gay sex.

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Amazing, thanks luv.

The comments are hysterical-- youngsters who can't believe that old people know what 'gay' means.

Not really related to the video, but just remembering my dad a bit. For his generation (he would be 90 is he was alive), he was very open minded, and when it came to LGBT people he was never bigoted or closed minded......For example, when all the fuss was made in the mid 90's, when Good ole boy Billy signed DOMA, my dad made the comment that why shouldn't gay couples be allowed to marry? His comment was basically if they wanted to share the suffering, hey, welcome aboard *lol*. His only thoughts about gay men having sex was in them having anal sex, he could never understand it, not in theory, but because he personally had problems with piles, so he would think about it and go "Oooooh" .......on a more serious note, he never tolerated anti gay slurs, and wasn't afraid to tell others they were being assholes if they did, and told more then a few people who were openly bigoted that he had several loads of shrapnel still in him fighting animals (referring to the Germans) who had the same beliefs as they did about gays, and that he would be damned if he would keep his mouth shut having seen what their type of people did, in effect telling them they were no better than the nazis, they were just as hateful, stupid and mean, and what could they say to him?

Getting back to the video, it was cute, but I think it also highlights something else important, that gays didn't just 'pop out' after the sexual revolution or after the 'glory years' of the 1950's, but rather were there all along. The downside to this is that older people are part of the reason that same sex marriage is still even an issue these days, because older people vote heavily and are for the most part still very heavily influenced by the homophobia of their day.....though not all,by any means. I once did outreach as a trans person to a seniors group, and it was really funny, couple of the old guys wanted to know if I was interested in a date (they were kidding with me, but it was nice kidding), and a couple of the women were busy telling me all the things I should do to really find a nice man, including finding the perfect dress and heels, hairstyle, etc, it was so cute. One women, who said she was 95, said she had learned a long time ago that all we have in this life is to live our lives as we feel we need to, and if others don't like it, they should take a high colonic enema, and go on a 50 mile hike with a full army field pack with a plug stuck up their butt for good measure *lol*..amazing lady, I kept in touch, she died when she was 105....

njlauren, your Dad sounds like a character - although a tolerant one.

His equating bigotry against gays with Nazism is a logical fallacy, however. Just because Nazis had an opinion on something does not make anyone with that same opinion "no better than a Nazi".

As to the topic, I am 55 years old, and dunno if that makes me an "Old person" in the eyes of the person who started the thread, but, like your father, I do not tolerate bigotry towards the GLBT community.

A few years ago I was dating a woman and she had used an epithet in a conversation we were having about Elton John. (She called him a f***** (rhymes with "maggot")).

I told her that I found that word just as offensive as I did "the N word" used in referring to a black person, and that she needed to stop using that word around me if she was interested in our being friends (or more).

She did not agree with me, but - perhaps somewhat begrudgingly - did not use the word again in my presence. In the years since then, I have seen a marked change in her attitude towards GLBT folks: When we attended a birthday party at the home of a Lesbian couple, one of whom was a dear friend of mine, my girlfriend remarked to me of the couple "They are just like normal people!" - meaning that she was surprised that their interaction in their home was just like that of any other loving couple. I don't know what she had been expecting, but what she saw - a nice, loving couple in a "normal" domestic setting - was evidently a surprise to her. When we later attended that couple's wedding, my girlfriend said to me "If someone had told me two years ago that I would attend a lesbian wedding, I would have told them they were nuts!" We have since have been out to dinner with that couple, have had them over for dinner, and have been over to their place for dinner, and my girlfriend (who is now my wife) thinks of them as just another couple we are friends with.

Her attitude towards gay men changed considerably when she had a long conversation with a gay friend of ours about gay marriage, and she learned that he had absolutely no rights regarding his long-time partner's hospital treatment. This resonated with her, as she had just been through months of Hell fighting for MY hospital treatment after I had suffered a stroke. She now gets angry when she hears people making derogatory statements about Gays and Lesbians.

I think that it just took her getting to know some of them personally to "humanize" the topic for her, making it more difficult for her to think of them in stereotypical terms rather than as actual people.

And, to tie it back into the thread topic, she is 59 years old.

I'm ancient but I understood about Gay sex a long time ago, particularly after studying Greek and Roman literature and then reading what happened to Oscar Wilde, and Alan Turing.

In the 1950s and 60s in the UK, some radio comedy programmes made use of what would now be called the 'gay subculture' including the so-called secret language that gays used between each other.

We youngsters knew that it was gay language, and that some of those using it were homosexual or lesbian - but we didn't care. London society allowed people, particularly in the Arts, to be gay as long as they didn't make it too obvious.

It wasn't too pleasant to be openly gay in rural areas or 'Oop North' where traditional values still applied. The idea of being "the only gay in the village" wasn't a joke in the 1950s. But most gays were accepted as being 'odd'.

ReiDeBastos said:

njlauren, your Dad sounds like a character - although a tolerant one.

His equating bigotry against gays with Nazism is a logical fallacy, however. Just because Nazis had an opinion on something does not make anyone with that same opinion "no better than a Nazi".

As to the topic, I am 55 years old, and dunno if that makes me an "Old person" in the eyes of the person who started the thread, but, like your father, I do not tolerate bigotry towards the GLBT community.

A few years ago I was dating a woman and she had used an epithet in a conversation we were having about Elton John. (She called him a f***** (rhymes with "maggot")).

I told her that I found that word just as offensive as I did "the N word" used in referring to a black person, and that she needed to stop using that word around me if she was interested in our being friends (or more).

She did not agree with me, but - perhaps somewhat begrudgingly - did not use the word again in my presence. In the years since then, I have seen a marked change in her attitude towards GLBT folks: When we attended a birthday party at the home of a Lesbian couple, one of whom was a dear friend of mine, my girlfriend remarked to me of the couple "They are just like normal people!" - meaning that she was surprised that their interaction in their home was just like that of any other loving couple. I don't know what she had been expecting, but what she saw - a nice, loving couple in a "normal" domestic setting - was evidently a surprise to her. When we later attended that couple's wedding, my girlfriend said to me "If someone had told me two years ago that I would attend a lesbian wedding, I would have told them they were nuts!" We have since have been out to dinner with that couple, have had them over for dinner, and have been over to their place for dinner, and my girlfriend (who is now my wife) thinks of them as just another couple we are friends with.

Her attitude towards gay men changed considerably when she had a long conversation with a gay friend of ours about gay marriage, and she learned that he had absolutely no rights regarding his long-time partner's hospital treatment. This resonated with her, as she had just been through months of Hell fighting for MY hospital treatment after I had suffered a stroke. She now gets angry when she hears people making derogatory statements about Gays and Lesbians.

I think that it just took her getting to know some of them personally to "humanize" the topic for her, making it more difficult for her to think of them in stereotypical terms rather than as actual people.

And, to tie it back into the thread topic, she is 59 years old.

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The problem with your statement is it misses the fundamental idea of Nazism, that there are people, whether it be Jews, gays, gypsies, those with mental illnesses and so forth, who are subhuman, and more importantly, that they (the Nazis) had the right to decide who was fully human and who was sub human.

Those who are bigoted against LGBT people are doing exactly the same thing. Think of stereotypes of gay men, they are 'swishes', they are 'fruits', they aren't men...lesbians are women who don't shave their legs, hate men, use power tools and spend all their time trying to turn young women gay....

And while they may not go to the extremes Nazis did, the fact that right now someone who is gay can be fired in 35 states simply for being gay says a lot, where a woman can have kids taken away from her simply because she is lesbian, and where a gay couple, in 2013, can legally get some benefits (and still not federal ones) because of who they love...... whether putting people in gas chambers, or using laws to make a group second class, or making fun of them or deriding them, it all has the same origins, someone so lacking in empathy to figure out that the person involved is human.

Nazi Germany holds other lessons as well. Keep in mind that many Germans were not enthralled by the Nazis, like the bigots in our own society, much of it came from the rural and working class sectors, the upper classes were not thrilled with hitler. The problem, as has been true in this country, is that those who didn't particularly like the nazis also weren't fired up much to do something to stop them.......

My father wasn't calling the person a Nazi, he was saying that deep down that what drove their bigotry was the same thing that drove Nazi ideology. We can sit back all smug and secure, but take a look at the US's kowtowing to the Jim Crowe south, where the federal government and the FBI did pretty much nothing against the clan, and every attempt at anti lynching legislation went absolutely nowhere, is that all that much different then what the Nazi's did? The scope is different, and I won't insult the memories of the victims of the holocaust to try and even compare it, but to the black family whose father didn't come home one night and was found beaten, with his dick cut off and stuffed in his mouth, when the mother of Emmet Till saw what had happened to her son (and those responsible never brought to justice), when gays had to hide out in fear for their lives and living simply for being who they were, the roots of their oppression were the same.

My dad worked with a man who had some severe congenital disabilities, and this guy was a pretty bad bigot, hated Jews, hated blacks, I assume gays as well, and once made comments to the effect that what Hitler had tried to do may not have been that bad a thing..and my dad looked at the guy, and quietly told him "you do know that Hitler wanted everyone who had mental and physical defects exterminated? And that if Germany had won the war, he would have been killed at birth...."......

My dad was right, because the scope of Nazism made it a unique horror, but to pat ourselves on the back and say "we aren't like them", that if people are anti semitic, anti black, anti gay, support banning gay marriage, are against legal protections for gays, that they are simply misguided people is to say 'we aren't like that', and that isn't true. As the obedience to authority experiments proved out, no one is immune from that, and the root cause of the Nazi horror wasn't different then any kind of prejudice or malice towards those who are different; the ony difference here is the scope of the oppression, not that it didn't happen.

njlauren said:

The problem with your statement is it misses the fundamental idea of Nazism, that there are people, whether it be Jews, gays, gypsies, those with mental illnesses and so forth, who are subhuman, and more importantly, that they (the Nazis) had the right to decide who was fully human and who was sub human.

Those who are bigoted against LGBT people are doing exactly the same thing.

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I wouldn't normally play the 'Nazi' card against someone, but njlauren has a point when it comes to those who are extremely biased, at least. When you actively campaign to deny people their rights, label them 'degraded' or 'filth' or explicitly compare them with animals (all things the Nazis did), you've gone off the deep end and don't deserve the courtesy of a polite rebuttal.

Pfft. If any old people around me have opinions, I just make 'em some cocoa and send them to bed.

I say its each to there own, the oldies that I know, couldn't care what they are

Ah. Ok, cool.

These people didn't grow up in 1910. I think the aging of the sexual revolution is gonna be interesting.

Netzach said:

Ah. Ok, cool.

These people didn't grow up in 1910. I think the aging of the sexual revolution is gonna be interesting.

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That's very true, I was born in 1938, so have a few years experience, and my desires will not go away in fact they keep getting stronger, so I have experimented. I will be honest what I find is that sex with another man is lust, we both excite each other to achieve a quick climax, but sex with a woman is pure pleasure, and seems to go on and one for a long time before we have an orgasmic explosion. Do other find it the same?

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Sorry - nothing to add - I was just pissed off seeing my reply to someone else's "hi" up there on News like I was a frigging blackcurrant or summinck

Did anyone notice that half of the Old People in the video were, in fact, gay themselves?

Stella_Omega said:

Did anyone notice that half of the Old People in the video were, in fact, gay themselves?

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Yep. I thought I'd give others a chance to make the same mistaken assumption that I did when I first saw it linked ;-)

This one reminded me that even though intellectually I know queer people have been around forever, my unconscious stereotyping hadn't caught up with that. That's a good lesson to learn.

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