all of a sudden passion suddenly

Serenade Me

get out your magic bag of words, fill me up
serenade with wit and wisdom wantonly
shower me with rainbows of rhythmic raunchiness
scatter your charm all over hot humid honeyness
seduce my heat with heavenly hoots of laughter

feel your love floating around me
forming a cocoon within my lovers arms
small doses of tickles and scratches to my soul
flickering my love buttons to overload, commanding my approval
fundamental sighs create a haven of whispering caresses

when your not here i feel you inside me
placing warm wet kisses inside my thighs
tongue traces a trail of hot desire down my booty
harvesting heaven with a memory of your hands
producing a gushing of heinous heat, within mystical molten folds

tolerable, intolerable
what it is, is one or the other

sometimes i have good days
others are bad
today it's a bad one

pounding instead of thinking
from inside the box
stitches hitch high
imagine pains in arms

chest crushing, heavy
until breathing is shallow
rapid, eurphoric even
autoerotic asphyxia

but suddenly choking on air
yes air, but everything closes in

crowds me in self-bondage
sensation of immobility
constrained

here i am in the dark
feeling for the lock
to undo the binds
before time runs out

a bleeding heart
stopping
every other beat or so
choke hold
rolled up tight
and put to bed
without CPR
past lives
can't catch us
coming far enough
out
away
to rid that
constrained heart
of a poison dart
that was never meant
for you.

again with the european elimination
the day we met
it was not raining in Paris
there was no postcard of the canals
floating in the water of the canal as we crossed the bridge in amsterdam

come over to my sled
you feigned a non existant accent
the night we found ourselves in wooden cradle beds, wo singles pushed together
as if that would matter, high railswould have to be vaulted,
at least our feet did not touch the ground, instead
curled underr
or hanging over the edges
of Haarlem

but that was not the day we met.

I was a deli girl behind the counter
you were an unemplioyed lifeguard
I reembered you from the community swim meets

you were cute
I called you over and offered you a job


and I called your mother when you did not apply

did either of us have a choice?


I was slicing american cheese in the deli
the day we met

its these days that follow nights
packed in tight, condensed
it is these days
chemiocals argue in my blood
fighting for doninance
the low ones, the dirty fighters win on these days
and as it should be no one comes to do my job
I stand alone

I cannot say "unprepared"
but the hours, on these day, the hours until night time stretch
lkie a mile of hot tar that sticks to white keds

these days follow nights
of lovers dancing around me
tossing me pennies that have lost their shine
we sit, patina green
oxidation brown
and wonder why it even matters

pick up the change and cash it in
turn it into wishes in tide pools

these days if I think of you
I fall down in deep again

I do not want this poem to end
I keep cheating
clicking up a cerse to add more in
like a pint by numbers
the boxes keep getting smaller and smaller
I paint over top

refusing to call it "finished"

these days I learn I am not
finished
colors blend to brown
monochrome my brush
needs turpentine
gasoline
petroleum based
something
baby I miss you on my pallet
we are dried muddled cracked when the rains come
we blur
magnified I still see the pigments hiding there

you cmoe

most days you are dead to me
like I suppose you should be then it comes
your weight
presses the juices from me
and I cannot breathe
and I would roll down a mile of tar to hear you to love you to know you just a little more

I thought these days were over

but like the crickets
and crocodiles
the repeating sounds draw me into you
and again
nothing else exists

my passion
undefined
no need for
refinement
in all its
absurdness
you observed this
again
with assurance
that you are in me.

it is so this desire spread out
like lace on the night stand
playing out this passion
over arched over twisted over
exposed you click the notch three too many spaces
in the name of honesty

your pianist fingers stretch the span of the keys
playing ribs like a board
strained knuckles buckle under your brasp

Rodin twitches
Camille prepares the plaster

we mold together

bust in bust

you will brush against her at the celebration
her nipples perk
as if on cue
surprised at her own reaction

curious he brings cool mineral waters
from the north

we clip hedges edge the trim and
plastic spins
in preparation

the instruments sleep
polished brass
press
fpr us

could this be... love?

shyly at first,
sweet glances exchanged.
body motion,
movement,
watching for the signs.
blushes and whispers,
caressing words roll out.

body heat rises,
molten gold tickles up.
taking ones breath,
tiny sighs outloud.
blushing a lil more.

tongue stumbles,
words rushing,
mind whirling.
please,
let him say something...

Her needs are endless
and she is a chasm of wanting
whatever I have. What drives
her I wonder does she think
I tried to deny her, perhaps
my fault was in appearance,
the ghost of what she wanted
before she even knew
it should have been hers.

Her fingers reach in tiny hooks
grappling, prepared to rescue
everything she perceives me
to undeserve. Oh she'll show
me how it is done and I'll be
sorry, I'll see that it was right

there in her hands all along.
I never held what she owns.
I never held what they should
have seen in her all along. Some

times I think I should just hand
it to her such as it is, such a much
and say here is what you
hold in your craw, eat what you
can't digest, chew up what you
think no one sees beyond me.

Take me, spit me to the curb
of their design, trod on my
appeal, scrape me away until I
am blotted from recognition
and you are pasted on my once
like wallpaper. Take it. Make me
a was, make yourself an is
because I don't want anything
enough to destroy it, and once
you have it I can go on
undisturbed.

She has reached that age where she knows it all.
Tells me day in, day out, this is how it should be.
Please remember I am a big girl now,
I can do anything.

What happened to the girl I once knew.
She was a sight to behold ... even then.
I love her, I have just learned,
that love changes ... it transforms.

As she has changed, so much...

Long beautiful golden hair, cut.
Chopped to the ground, weightlessness
at its best. A fairy teenager has replaced,
the uneven edges of a lil girl I knew.

Boys are hot, lil brothers are brats.
Can I have more money for this?
No, I do NOT want that. Take me here.
I am gonna go there.

No, Mom I will do as I like.

I'm sorry Mom, for being so disrespectful.
*Screaming* across the room she glides.
I'm sorry your sick, how can I help?
Oh the heart, she leads it so well.
Lil finger crooked to Mom with prideful,
gapped tooth grin, so you wanna be my frienn...

A daughter to be proud of. Brilliant, too damn smart.

Reading, she writes, (smiles) what will she do next.
Beautiful smile, reminds me of my Mom.

Sparkling eyes of mischief,
yes she has my number... sure enough.
I do all I can. Love her with all my soul,
knowing...
She is the daughter of my heart...

passioned tightrope
string driven
in my pinion
ain't nothin'but a thing
shoulders almost touch
the binds that
buy me time
and give you over
to my authority
where you'll wear
my long black coat
and nothing more
but bits of rope
and metal rings
adorning you,
i'll don you like
5 carat rock baby,
and make them all wish
they were me

she twists to make room
they have migrated, these figures
that press

lips shaped in kiss and pout
hands reach through ribs,
spine

faceless mother
shoulders rotate,
slide around the skulls of the unborn
that smile still in this struggle

Justin
Matthew
Anna
William

they whisper names
that bubble under skin
elastic stretched
patient faces form letter sounds with lips
longing to speak
fingers sign the screenplay
of mother cut off at the knees

shades of purple splattered

ah but look this way
he points behind where the pinks emerge from clouds
we pivot
all my children
pivot
and wait to be released

it is not the chains
that is too easy
these cancerous roots that erode his face
digging pathways to his center while Conquistador trunk
grows sunward
wrapping his thoughts without purpose
into heartwood,
wormwood
shagbark
protects with its loose grip
air flows through

he sees his fate
it is tilted downward
and to the west
but it is not these chains that hold him here
but hold him together

perhaps it is the wood
that births the man into feathered hats
perhaps the face sees fate
unfolding

someone please tell me the time

and now?

are we moving forward?
do we peel or layer tonight?

layers of
meat stipped away
and onion losing its skin,
begins
again...
the trees are quite beautiful
climbing almost feels cruel
but not enough
not enough to stop me
set in a way
like cement
immovable as i go
any which way
the wind blows
i see blue eyes
looking back at me
and perceive the depth
that is 2d
acronyms from weeks gone by
still take up space
right here,
my hand resting
before it goes to work again.

He said, how can you write about love
When you have no idea what it really is...

I look into the mirror of time.
Reflections of cracked, broken love.
Shine back, dead embers blackened with time
nothing remains, cept' time.

Time to get back, to the world of the living.
The world where my dreams can,
have come true. Pick up your carpet bag of love.
Dip it into the traffic
Of what could be...

I really want him happy. He does not see...
All he sees is death, destruction.
Crazy pictures fill his head, of what used to be.
A time when he was the only happy man,
only happy man on earth,
Only he was happy...

Happiness I say, comes from within.
I wanna be happy too. I can be happy,
Just please leave me be.

Go on with your life. Reach out, find a gurl.
She can be the happiness you desire, want...
Need in your heart of hearts.

I can write about love, happiness, desire.
I have hope, dreams, of what I want.
Me.... You know, the girl you used to know.
You met her, wed her, and only remembered,
You...

I stand here, tell you...
Life is not all about you.
I am me.
I am happy.

Me without you...
Happy~

brass arms stretch like putty to gather them,
the broken ones
they dig for pieces in the creases of neighbors
limbs bend back on themselves
for the comfort of belonging
even if just to self,
separated

blind and melted
do we breathe our way back togther?

mallet hammered and dented
bring the solder scars-
historical markings of these days
nothing fit

I can do this all night,
write myself into you
invent meaning like a cleptomaniac tour guide

your cough from the back row
stars captured in teh center of your
sign language
you hold them still
while I reach up through the grass to find you

sun beads fingertips red can you feel the singe

we grow from the same earth, you and me
shading the tree and
shaded by the tree we grow
from the same earth

solar rays illuminate,
heat, and pass right through us
bouncing from bones
passing through flesh through yours
through mine
into this ground that feeds us
under the mist that passes

upon arriving he picks up the forwarded letters
and finds the one...
marked like a passport in the languages of flight

peeling another stanp from the memories of my body
he decides his next location
forwards this letter
unopened

someday he will arrive
to discover I have come home

pweter letter opener in hand
and we will read of this news together

you carry the weight
of our world under stretched ribs
this ivory you use to sketch my inage into your sands

they too line the beach
like Jonah's leftovers miniature combs for real human hair
you weave into brushes that pain in their eyes

the twins have my eyes, lover, do you see?
and your hands
I see them pressing like elbows for room
for form

fingers stretch and limber
preparing to reshape their parents
in their own image

they are coming lover,
sure as this fog that lifts

the color has come back to your cheeks

sleep little babies
sleep

hard-edged new prespective
viewed at high contrast
white is brighter
black is black as night

parallel on the road
center
these lines go on forever
or they seem
2000 miles feels that way

through the haze
veil of fog
stars kiss the sky
i stop counting them at dawn

the sun brings color
to the shadows
but shutter speed closes
before the image is over-exposed

photographic
graphic
wide open letting
it filter in
a long road travelled
conundrum unravelled
sun setting
on your side
rising on mine
rising, you are
and you say
put me in your belly, baby
and its over
two times over
i see art
where others just see
a fuck
i see you
perfect.

we fit together... perfectly
pefect is the goal to ... reach
reach in take all you ... want
want me, like i want .... you
you teach me so much about ... happiness
hapiness within my heart ... sizzles
sizzles on the hot pavement of ... time
time to capture my dreams of ... us
us, you and i, one ... together
together we will be ... always
always, you are on my mind, filling my heart with ... love
love to watch you ... sleep
sleep in my arms, awake with a kiss from my ... lips
lips red as wine, licking those same wine tasted lips with my ... tongue
tongue upon ... me
me tasting ... you
you tasting ... perfect

mmmmmmmmmm mornin'

Staring in silence
lust unspoken
stomach in knots,
full moon lights your face
closing in on mine,
tension rising
skin touches skin
lips melt together
dancing tongues,
passion rises
sparks fly,
long sighs
attraction explored
first kiss.

A kiss

I want it
open-mouthed and tongue
jammed down to there, a soft mouth
feeding frenzy for blood-
red lips. Swallow me
whole and hungry; eat
my lust and leave me
ravenous and raw. I want it
now and now and now
pressed flat back
against the wall
and split-legged
needy. Part your lips
and let me in.

Sweating bodies
on satin sheets
champagne on ice
red roses in vase,
legs entwined
long kises on lips
delicate touches
gentle thrusts,
breathless pants
electric pleasure
muffled screams
kneading flesh,
juices flowing
~ First fuck.