How To Find The Submissive Man Of My Dreams

I recently found out about the femdom lifestyle and love the idea of having a submissive man in my life. I am naturally a dominant woman and I am turned on my the sensual side of femdom. I have don e my research online like reading magazines like Femdoming and I have tried other dating sites geared towards BDSM relationships but so far it seems I only find men that are into femdom sex. I like a guy that is chivalrous and really does enjoy being in a female led relationship. Any advice on how to find the submissive man of my dreams.

cyndi_lucy said:

I recently found out about the femdom lifestyle and love the idea of having a submissive man in my life. I am naturally a dominant woman and I am turned on my the sensual side of femdom. I have don e my research online like reading magazines like Femdoming and I have tried other dating sites geared towards BDSM relationships but so far it seems I only find men that are into femdom sex. I like a guy that is chivalrous and really does enjoy being in a female led relationship. Any advice on how to find the submissive man of my dreams.

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Try connecting with the BDSM community where you live. There's usually one out there lurking in the shadows somewhere. There's a website that starts with "fet" and ends with "life" that you might find helpful in finding connections like I'm talking about. The sort of men you seek are not plentiful, but they do exist. Trust me. And good luck.

Controlling a man in the bedroom, is the ultimate goal for me too.. but not in a bad or mean type of way.

I like a quiet, submissive man too, because i'm also quiet. I'm not shy, or anti social, i'm just not very talkative, so having a man in my life to help me make dinner, and bring me breakfast in bed naked, would be like a dream come true lol...

I guess if they described me they would call me a switch because I can be a good girl and a bad girl at times.

Antihackergrl32 said:

Controlling a man in the bedroom, is the ultimate goal for me too.. but not in a bad or mean type of way.

I like a quiet, submissive man too, because i'm also quiet. I'm not shy, or anti social, i'm just not very talkative, so having a man in my life to help me make dinner, and bring me breakfast in bed naked, would be like a dream come true lol...

I guess if they described me they would call me a switch because I can be a good girl and a bad girl at times.

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I would be described as a switch as well. While I am mostly gently dominant, I can absolutely derive satisfaction from making dinner and bringing breakfast to my Goddess, expecting nothing in return. One would think that would be a dream come true for all women, and perhaps it is, but I've also learned there are some who have no appreciation of that at all.

Not really sure where I'm going with all this, just responding to what others have written and making a few observations of my own I guess.

I think I am a switch too. I have times where I love being dominate. But I have a side that likes to be submissive. I’ve just started exploring my boundaries with my wife. Opening up about risqué fantasies. She’s trying to accommodate for it because before opening up we had a very typical sex life. I was nervous to even ask her about some things. Because she has always looked at me in a very masculine way. I was hoping that by revealing some things I’ve pondered on that she wouldn’t get weirded out. And so far so good. We have now got a spreader bar, restraints, several new toys, blindfolds, and are even discussing a possible pegging. Which I’m a little nervous about. I’m new to playing with my butt. Do any of your ladies ever have fantasies of pegging your man? Or would that create a image problem to where you would loose respect for him? And as far as comments about it being gay. I don’t find it to be homosexual if your doing anal play with the opposite sex.

Workinstud007 said:

I think I am a switch too. I have times where I love being dominate. But I have a side that likes to be submissive. I’ve just started exploring my boundaries with my wife. Opening up about risqué fantasies. She’s trying to accommodate for it because before opening up we had a very typical sex life. I was nervous to even ask her about some things. Because she has always looked at me in a very masculine way. I was hoping that by revealing some things I’ve pondered on that she wouldn’t get weirded out. And so far so good. We have now got a spreader bar, restraints, several new toys, blindfolds, and are even discussing a possible pegging. Which I’m a little nervous about. I’m new to playing with my butt. Do any of your ladies ever have fantasies of pegging your man? Or would that create a image problem to where you would loose respect for him? And as far as comments about it being gay. I don’t find it to be homosexual if your doing anal play with the opposite sex.

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So you want to be pegged? Great! All that means is that you like ass play. It has nothing to do with sub, Dom, gay, straight, Democrat, gluten-free, whatever. As long as your partner is willing, knock yourselves out and don't waste any time worrying about what others think.

I second the suggestion for people to get involved in their local kink group. Our group has a page on FL and posts all kinds of events and activities there. Signing up with Fet also means that you'll be able to see who identies as what, and have a chance to find out who likes their kink 24/7 and who wants to keep it in the bedroom.

Here are links to a couple of threads that you may find helpful/interesting.
http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=1389900
http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=1404085

May i be your sub man ?

cyndi_lucy said:

I recently found out about the femdom lifestyle and love the idea of having a submissive man in my life. I am naturally a dominant woman and I am turned on my the sensual side of femdom. I have don e my research online like reading magazines like Femdoming and I have tried other dating sites geared towards BDSM relationships but so far it seems I only find men that are into femdom sex. I like a guy that is chivalrous and really does enjoy being in a female led relationship. Any advice on how to find the submissive man of my dreams.

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Hi im a totally straight wm 55 closet cd i have only had 3 women with strapons and LOVED IT WANNA TALK ?

what can i say except for good luck.
what you look for is more towards a life time partner that will be there for you when you need him but in the same time be okay with everything you do especially in the bedroom.
what i can tell you is that it mostly depends on how open they can be with their partner but nowadays is kinda hard to do it because the society tells you that you do not need a SO to be happy so few people actually try and put feelings in any good relation.
when i was in my teens (lets say 18+) i had a relation with an older woman that was shy at first but after she opened herself i found out she always liked t try something different, meaning femdom. it was her kink but she got scared after she tried 2 times to open herself to her bfs then but it ended up in a breakup soon after.
truthfully i didn't even knew what she was referring to femdom but i trusted her so we tried different stuff. it was a very nice experience for both of us in the bedroom and in our relation.
all i can say is, there are people out there but it will be a challenge to find them, but when you find that one ... keep him, because you might not find another one soon or at all

Sounds like a life that I would enjoy. I enjoy being in a female lead relationship. I have very few sexual limits, love being pegged by a strap on. I always treat a lady like a lady. Wanna chat?

Only repeating what's been said...Fetlife and probably some munches they have. Never been to one myself (the community I live in is too small), however. I think that the lesser submissive or dominant may not find much in common there, though. Some groups seem to be run pretty stiff-handedly. I've been tossed out of submissive men groups for not having a submissive enough profile, and barked at by some dommes for the same. (I generally avoid "dominant" women because they just seem angry for no reason.)

If there's some other online community I don't know what it is, since I'm not looking all that hard at this point.

But I'd kinda wonder if the more commonly recognized dating sites would have some profile questions that would kinda steer towards this personality aspect?