Sex with wife changing, for the better, tips??

jckontharocks

Really Experienced
Joined
Aug 5, 2010
Posts
462
My wife has always liked attention to her nipples, which I love. After 2 kids and breastfeeding she really has asked for the intensity of the play to become firmer sucking, harder pulling, etc.

Sometimes I worry I'm going to hurt her or it's going to be too hard. I know it's up to her to tell me what the right amount is, but she likes for me to be the one to push the comfort limits.

Any advice/tips on maturing this for her further? Clamps? Piercings? Toys? You name it? Again this is just for her pleasure level, not mine. I just love pleasing her and want to bring it to ever level she desires. The lastest feedback she's given me is she loves them being sucked, but also likes the twisting and pulling.

I believe anatomy has some to do with what can be accomplished, so I feel compelled to share she has small boobs and small areolas with a massive nipple. The nipple is ~2/3 size of a Tootsie roll.
 
Don't worry about hurting her , she will let you know , listen to her communication is key in any relationship ,

Piercings can be great fun , takes a lil bit for them to fully heal ...
 
Nipples...

When I was younger my nipples were so sensitive even moderate sucking would hurt. I remember how much pain our first daughter caused me. It was so bad after the first week I debated giving up. Who am I kidding I laid there in our bed crying. Between having the flow issues and the actual pain of the “let down” it was awful.

Then slowly I got better at it. There was still a lot of pain. It felt like she was trying to pull something out of the tip of my nipple that wouldn’t fit. Slowley that got better. Then it was the drying, cracking, bleeding, and hyper sensitivity. It hurt to wear a bra, any bra, even the softest, silkiest robe. With the help of a close friend, my husband, and really good (expensive) lotion, and balm I was able to get through it. I would stand at the mirror and look at my once pink, soft nipples. They were now a dark purple, cracked, and sore. It hurt to move, to walk, to open the refrigerator, forgot about even putting my hands over my head. That never stopped. When she was three I stopped. I would stand at the mirror and look at my once pink nipples, they were now a dark purple

While we were trying to have our second I wouldn’t let my husband do more than soft kissing, no hard sucking, no pinching. Somewhere during the “joy” of pregnancy, and birth, I forgot about the pain of breast feeding.

With our second the period of pain was more compact. The actual feeding only really caused pain the first two weeks. Or maybe that’s that how I remember it. Or maybe our second daughter is just a more gentle soul. That however didn’t stop the drying, cracking, and bleeding. All the movement pain was back just not as intense. Well another two years of that and I was done..

About 6 months after stopping, I took a long look in the mirror after a shower. My nipples no longer dark purple, and cracked. They weren’t a light shade of pink either. It was darker. My husband called it a mature pink, two badges of honor. Great I thought, they go right with the touch of sag, oh and the stretch marks. Ha ha let’s not forget the ponch.... ah motherhood..

Sorry to your question..

5 and a half years later. Rough breast play please. Wow it’s almost primal now. I prefer whole nipple suckers, or adjustable clamps. I see a younger guy on a budget. He bought a bunch of those little claw hair things. While not the most powerful of a clamp the teeth provide a nice sensation. Rubber styling clips also created a wonderful sensation, when paired with close pins.

I would start there, it’s all cost effective stuff, and none of it looks like anything other than regular hair stuff..

Something my husband couldn’t get past was being rough with me. He still has a hard time. Try to encourage your wife to talk with you before, during (not always easy) and after. Also you know her, you can tell when she’s enjoying something, and when it’s causing too much of a sensation..

Goood luck, and have fun!
 
When I was younger my nipples were so sensitive even moderate sucking would hurt. I remember how much pain our first daughter caused me. It was so bad after the first week I debated giving up. Who am I kidding I laid there in our bed crying. Between having the flow issues and the actual pain of the “let down” it was awful.

Then slowly I got better at it. There was still a lot of pain. It felt like she was trying to pull something out of the tip of my nipple that wouldn’t fit. Slowley that got better. Then it was the drying, cracking, bleeding, and hyper sensitivity. It hurt to wear a bra, any bra, even the softest, silkiest robe. With the help of a close friend, my husband, and really good (expensive) lotion, and balm I was able to get through it. I would stand at the mirror and look at my once pink, soft nipples. They were now a dark purple, cracked, and sore. It hurt to move, to walk, to open the refrigerator, forgot about even putting my hands over my head. That never stopped. When she was three I stopped. I would stand at the mirror and look at my once pink nipples, they were now a dark purple

While we were trying to have our second I wouldn’t let my husband do more than soft kissing, no hard sucking, no pinching. Somewhere during the “joy” of pregnancy, and birth, I forgot about the pain of breast feeding.

With our second the period of pain was more compact. The actual feeding only really caused pain the first two weeks. Or maybe that’s that how I remember it. Or maybe our second daughter is just a more gentle soul. That however didn’t stop the drying, cracking, and bleeding. All the movement pain was back just not as intense. Well another two years of that and I was done..

About 6 months after stopping, I took a long look in the mirror after a shower. My nipples no longer dark purple, and cracked. They weren’t a light shade of pink either. It was darker. My husband called it a mature pink, two badges of honor. Great I thought, they go right with the touch of sag, oh and the stretch marks. Ha ha let’s not forget the ponch.... ah motherhood..

Sorry to your question..

5 and a half years later. Rough breast play please. Wow it’s almost primal now. I prefer whole nipple suckers, or adjustable clamps. I see a younger guy on a budget. He bought a bunch of those little claw hair things. While not the most powerful of a clamp the teeth provide a nice sensation. Rubber styling clips also created a wonderful sensation, when paired with close pins.

I would start there, it’s all cost effective stuff, and none of it looks like anything other than regular hair stuff..

Something my husband couldn’t get past was being rough with me. He still has a hard time. Try to encourage your wife to talk with you before, during (not always easy) and after. Also you know her, you can tell when she’s enjoying something, and when it’s causing too much of a sensation..

Goood luck, and have fun!

Wow great feedback! Way to stick out the breastfeeding, you should be proud. My wife and I sought out many classes before birth and she was a champ, I make sure to tell her how awesome she is!

Can I ask, what is you favorite? Clamps ? Hard sucking? Can you describe what rough is to you?
 
It’s all relative right!?!

Wow great feedback! Way to stick out the breastfeeding, you should be proud. My wife and I sought out many classes before birth and she was a champ, I make sure to tell her how awesome she is!

Can I ask, what is you favorite? Clamps ? Hard sucking? Can you describe what rough is to you?

If you’re using teeth don’t draw blood. Suck softly on one while you pinch hard and twist the other. I’m not bashful, I’ll tell you to be more or less firm..
 
Piercings - only if you both like them. I personally like the natural nipple more. Piercings also make lots of types of play challenging or impossible because you can rip the nipple or cause nerve/tissue damage, so if you're into nipple play - I would avoid it.

Clamps, clothespins - always good. Remember that you don't have to clamp only the nipple itself - you can put clothespins on the sides of the nipple, clamping areola.

Next on the list is vacuum sucktion cups. They come in a variety of shapes, and can be small ones to suck on a nipple itself, or large full-breast ones. Vacuum is a unique sensation. See, a clamp or clothespin hurts at first, but then it goes numb because the blood leaves the area. It then hurts again when you take it off. But a vacuum cup hurts ALL THE TIME, because the blood is flowing free.

One of the very easy yet very effective DIY toys is 2 short smooth sticks (like half of a pencil or even a third) with rubber bands on each side, holding the sticks firmly together. You pull them apart, put the nipple through and let them squeeze. You can make it as light or as hard as you want, depending on rubber band choice and how you wrap them. And it costs like a dollar to make them.

Speaking of which, rubber bands is a very good appliance. you can snap the skin with them like you did in school, or you can put several wide rubber bands aroung the breast. One rubber band is nothing much, but several squeeze the breast rather hard.

Next, let's not forget shibari. There are lots of ways to tie breasts up, to concentrate on nipples or breasts in general.

Then, a good strong vibrator is always good. You can take a vibrating toothbrush and use it on nipples - not the bristles! The smooth side. Or you can take any other storng vibrator.

You can also get into lactation and milk play, if you want to. To me, there's nothing more intimate and sexy than a man breastfeeding off of his woman. You mentioned your wife had kids - that means that re-inducing lactation will be easier for her.

Be careful with teeth. I know it looks sexy, but it's really easy to misjudge. Nipples are quite soft, and your jaw is the strongest muscle in your body, able to easily produce up to a ton of pressure force. I wouldn't do anything more than grazing them with my teeth but never biting on.

Last but not least, watch some instructional videos on nipple play. How to pull, twist, pinch, rub them.

And at the very end - don't be afraid to hurt your wife, if she wants rougher play. Some pain feels welcome. Think of massage - it hurts when the doctor massages a sore muscle, but then it feels so good. Just trust her to know her limits and play away. Give her a safeword for harder play and you are good to go.
 
If you’re using teeth don’t draw blood. Suck softly on one while you pinch hard and twist the other. I’m not bashful, I’ll tell you to be more or less firm..

Thanks for the feedback. Now I'm all worked up. VDay sex was hot at my house.
 
Wonderful...

I had a wonderful and very satisfying past two days, and it will continue through Sunday...
 
Piercings - only if you both like them. I personally like the natural nipple more. Piercings also make lots of types of play challenging or impossible because you can rip the nipple or cause nerve/tissue damage, so if you're into nipple play - I would avoid it.

Clamps, clothespins - always good. Remember that you don't have to clamp only the nipple itself - you can put clothespins on the sides of the nipple, clamping areola.

Next on the list is vacuum sucktion cups. They come in a variety of shapes, and can be small ones to suck on a nipple itself, or large full-breast ones. Vacuum is a unique sensation. See, a clamp or clothespin hurts at first, but then it goes numb because the blood leaves the area. It then hurts again when you take it off. But a vacuum cup hurts ALL THE TIME, because the blood is flowing free.

One of the very easy yet very effective DIY toys is 2 short smooth sticks (like half of a pencil or even a third) with rubber bands on each side, holding the sticks firmly together. You pull them apart, put the nipple through and let them squeeze. You can make it as light or as hard as you want, depending on rubber band choice and how you wrap them. And it costs like a dollar to make them.

Speaking of which, rubber bands is a very good appliance. you can snap the skin with them like you did in school, or you can put several wide rubber bands aroung the breast. One rubber band is nothing much, but several squeeze the breast rather hard.

Next, let's not forget shibari. There are lots of ways to tie breasts up, to concentrate on nipples or breasts in general.

Then, a good strong vibrator is always good. You can take a vibrating toothbrush and use it on nipples - not the bristles! The smooth side. Or you can take any other storng vibrator.

You can also get into lactation and milk play, if you want to. To me, there's nothing more intimate and sexy than a man breastfeeding off of his woman. You mentioned your wife had kids - that means that re-inducing lactation will be easier for her.

Be careful with teeth. I know it looks sexy, but it's really easy to misjudge. Nipples are quite soft, and your jaw is the strongest muscle in your body, able to easily produce up to a ton of pressure force. I wouldn't do anything more than grazing them with my teeth but never biting on.

Last but not least, watch some instructional videos on nipple play. How to pull, twist, pinch, rub them.

And at the very end - don't be afraid to hurt your wife, if she wants rougher play. Some pain feels welcome. Think of massage - it hurts when the doctor massages a sore muscle, but then it feels so good. Just trust her to know her limits and play away. Give her a safeword for harder play and you are good to go.

I'm very skeptical on the piercings. I don't want to ruin a great thing. Thanks for the advice!!!
 
Another subject with us in anal play...

She is starting to really like when I rub her asshole when She's close to climax. I'd like to take this further, but as of right now this is one of those things she likes done, but does NOT like to talk about.

I assume I should just stay patient until she brings it up? Guessing that will never happen.
 
No. I think you should simply in plain terms suggest her to bring it further.
maybe not straight into anal sex. Talk about purchasing a small anal plug and playign with it. Maybe even a vibrating plug, or simply a decorative one.

One thing that people often forget about anal sex is that it may and often does get messy. It may smell funky. As a woman, she may be very self-conscious about that.
 
For the nipples, start with wooden clothespins, if you can get good ones. If they are too intense, you can clamp them over a book, a piece of wood or something to keep the jaws open for a few days. They'll loosen up. I've found the plastic ones to be too severe.

Look around the house for other types of clips/clamps. Test them out on your hand. Use the area of flesh between your thumb and pointer finger. That's pretty much how they will feel on a nipple. I have large nipples and most nipple clamps are too small for me.

As for her ass, you could try putting coconut oil and working a fingertip in. If she doesn't object, try pushing your finger in further. Use plenty of oil and go very slowly to stretch her until she can take two finger or three or wherever she stops you. If you can get two or three fingers in, you can get your cock in, if she will let you.

Or you can try a small butt plug. This is my favorite.

https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/B00KTZOJ8A/ref=oh_aui_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&psc=1

It's very smooth and goes in with just a little oil or lube. It stays in until you take it out. And it's comfortable to pull out.

I also have this one:

https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/B01HOCAXDK/ref=oh_aui_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&th=1

I love pushing it in. I love it while it's in me. It's the taking it out that's a problem. Does not want to come out. And when it finally does, it's rather painful.

So start small if you want to use a butt plug. I have used a variety of them. Some of the silicone ones might work for a beginner. Look for the longer ones. You may have to hold it in place though. I tend to shoot them out of me. Do *not* get the silicone ones with the jewel. I've tried them. They're too soft. I can't get them in. Others have complained that once they do get them in, the jewel pops out and they can't get them back out. One person had to go to the ER.
 
I love pushing it in. I love it while it's in me. It's the taking it out that's a problem. Does not want to come out. And when it finally does, it's rather painfu
Both to push it in easier and to take it out - push out as if you want to go to the toilet. That action actually relaxes the sphincter, and it becomes easier to put things in or pull them out.:cattail:
 
No. I think you should simply in plain terms suggest her to bring it further.
maybe not straight into anal sex. Talk about purchasing a small anal plug and playign with it. Maybe even a vibrating plug, or simply a decorative one.

One thing that people often forget about anal sex is that it may and often does get messy. It may smell funky. As a woman, she may be very self-conscious about that.

I think that's would be self conscious.
 
For the nipples, start with wooden clothespins, if you can get good ones. If they are too intense, you can clamp them over a book, a piece of wood or something to keep the jaws open for a few days. They'll loosen up. I've found the plastic ones to be too severe.

Look around the house for other types of clips/clamps. Test them out on your hand. Use the area of flesh between your thumb and pointer finger. That's pretty much how they will feel on a nipple. I have large nipples and most nipple clamps are too small for me.

As for her ass, you could try putting coconut oil and working a fingertip in. If she doesn't object, try pushing your finger in further. Use plenty of oil and go very slowly to stretch her until she can take two finger or three or wherever she stops you. If you can get two or three fingers in, you can get your cock in, if she will let you.

Or you can try a small butt plug. This is my favorite.

https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/B00KTZOJ8A/ref=oh_aui_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&psc=1

It's very smooth and goes in with just a little oil or lube. It stays in until you take it out. And it's comfortable to pull out.

I also have this one:

https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/B01HOCAXDK/ref=oh_aui_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&th=1

I love pushing it in. I love it while it's in me. It's the taking it out that's a problem. Does not want to come out. And when it finally does, it's rather painful.

So start small if you want to use a butt plug. I have used a variety of them. Some of the silicone ones might work for a beginner. Look for the longer ones. You may have to hold it in place though. I tend to shoot them out of me. Do *not* get the silicone ones with the jewel. I've tried them. They're too soft. I can't get them in. Others have complained that once they do get them in, the jewel pops out and they can't get them back out. One person had to go to the ER.

Did you have difficulty coming to terms with the fact you like ass play at first? I just want her to be cool with it and openly enjoy it. Obviously she enjoys it, but she would deny it if asked.
 
Do you have pierced nipple(s)?

I did until our daughter was born.

The sensitivity of my nipples didn't change all that much , they got a little more sensitive , my husband spent more time playing with them :D

Beware the rings can get caught on things , lace bra , string on a blouse , blanket , etc...
 
I did until our daughter was born.

The sensitivity of my nipples didn't change all that much , they got a little more sensitive , my husband spent more time playing with them :D

Beware the rings can get caught on things , lace bra , string on a blouse , blanket , etc...

Do you miss them now?
 
Do you miss them now?

Yes some times I do miss them , we talked about me getting my nips pierced again last evening because of this thread , I'm not sure if I will or not as I said earlier there are good and bad things associated with having rings , right now the bad things are preventing me .
 
Yes some times I do miss them , we talked about me getting my nips pierced again last evening because of this thread , I'm not sure if I will or not as I said earlier there are good and bad things associated with having rings , right now the bad things are preventing me .

What was the best part if them? I'm betting pulling on them during fucking?
Glad I inspired some sex talk !
 
Last edited:
What was the best part if them? I'm betting pulling on them during fucking?
Glad I inspired some sex talk !

The best part is my husband payed more attention to my boobs , he would walk pass me and lightly touch my boobs trying to get my nipples to show all the time :D

As for sex , he definitely payed more attention he really liked the visual aspect of my nipples being pierced .

Our sex life is on the rougher side , pulling , tugging , biting etc my nipples are all apart of it .

As I said in a earlier post , she will let you know if you have gone to far .

Communication is the most important thing in a relationship .
 
Update:

Got very heated at my house last night.

We started cowgirl, I immediately went to the nipps. I pulled and tugged firmly. Sucked and nibbled. Then... I twisted and pulled one, OUCH! Haha oops. She said not that hard and we kept going. Quickly orgasm came over her. She did something that hasn't happened in a while, she squirted?

Might have to get to that pain level again?!
 
My wife has always liked attention to her nipples, which I love. After 2 kids and breastfeeding she really has asked for the intensity of the play to become firmer sucking, harder pulling, etc.

Sometimes I worry I'm going to hurt her or it's going to be too hard. I know it's up to her to tell me what the right amount is, but she likes for me to be the one to push the comfort limits.

Any advice/tips on maturing this for her further? Clamps? Piercings? Toys? You name it? Again this is just for her pleasure level, not mine. I just love pleasing her and want to bring it to ever level she desires. The lastest feedback she's given me is she loves them being sucked, but also likes the twisting and pulling.

I believe anatomy has some to do with what can be accomplished, so I feel compelled to share she has small boobs and small areolas with a massive nipple. The nipple is ~2/3 size of a Tootsie roll.
If you add 25% at a time- any injury will heal easily and you will know -- if the injury is worth it.
But have you considered that she might enjoy MORE nipple stimulation at times when you are not going to have MORE sex?
Just as you might enjoy getting sucked for a minute or two ... all day... in preparation for more total sex experience later???
 
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