Isolated Blurts - The HT Cafe Way

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Hmmm, we haven't shot any snakes (yet), but we have our share of snake stories. lol We've even seen a hawk swoop down and pick a snake out of our back yard. Then there was the black snake that got caught in the tire of my car and made me skid. It costs $60 to have a snake's carcass removed from your tire at the Toyota dealership. But the snake story to end snake stories - the water moccasin on our back step. Ewwww! *shudders* That one still grosses me out!

I wonder, is the architecture different down there as opposed to up here in New England? What I mean is, if the possibility of water moccasins on the back step is a very real one, has the back porch/patio design changed to allow for one to spot said legless beastie? Differently placed windows perhaps?

There is only one way to deal with a snake. Violently. There, I said it. Ick.
 
I wonder, is the architecture different down there as opposed to up here in New England? What I mean is, if the possibility of water moccasins on the back step is a very real one, has the back porch/patio design changed to allow for one to spot said legless beastie? Differently placed windows perhaps?

There is only one way to deal with a snake. Violently. There, I said it. Ick.
We have a sliding glass door at the back step. The cats and dogs love to sit there and watch the world go by, so they see a lot of stuff. We've learned to pay attention when they get that intent look on their faces. The step is only a few inches high, a slab really, so creepy crawlies do find their way to our back door on occasion.

We very rarely see poisonous snakes here. It's usually just black snakes. We don't kill snakes unless they're poisonous or in the house. When we first got married, we had a run in with a pygmy rattler. That was fun. That little shit was aggressive as hell. That was when hubby learned that I have a special scream for things that need killing. LOL He learned to come running with a shovel when he hears that scream.

I didn't know what a pygmy rattler was at that time. When I first saw the little guy, I didn't know what it was. It was about the size of a pencil. His head was raised, and he was trying to rattle his tail. He was so young he didn't have rattles, but I figured it couldn't be a good thing that a snake's tail and head were both raised and quivering at me. I hauled ass back in the house to give it time to go somewhere else. I saw it three or four more times before hubby got the chance to kill it. I was scared to walk out of my own house for a few weeks. lol
 
We have a sliding glass door at the back step. The cats and dogs love to sit there and watch the world go by, so they see a lot of stuff. We've learned to pay attention when they get that intent look on their faces. The step is only a few inches high, a slab really, so creepy crawlies do find their way to our back door on occasion.

We very rarely see poisonous snakes here. It's usually just black snakes. We don't kill snakes unless they're poisonous or in the house. When we first got married, we had a run in with a pygmy rattler. That was fun. That little shit was aggressive as hell. That was when hubby learned that I have a special scream for things that need killing. LOL He learned to come running with a shovel when he hears that scream.

I didn't know what a pygmy rattler was at that time. When I first saw the little guy, I didn't know what it was. It was about the size of a pencil. His head was raised, and he was trying to rattle his tail. He was so young he didn't have rattles, but I figured it couldn't be a good thing that a snake's tail and head were both raised and quivering at me. I hauled ass back in the house to give it time to go somewhere else. I saw it three or four more times before hubby got the chance to kill it. I was scared to walk out of my own house for a few weeks. lol

This should be the next tourism ad...and when everyone leaves and the property prices dive, I'll swoop in...excellent!

On a more serious note, I'm glad you're ok...sounds a wee bit dangerous in your backyard. Instead of mowing, did you ever consider the 'scorched-earth' option? :)
 
I wonder, is the architecture different down there as opposed to up here in New England? What I mean is, if the possibility of water moccasins on the back step is a very real one, has the back porch/patio design changed to allow for one to spot said legless beastie? Differently placed windows perhaps?

There is only one way to deal with a snake. Violently. There, I said it. Ick.


My yard seems to be a haven for venomous snakes and other goodies. I've had the pleasure of a water moccasin (in the water behind our house), a huge eastern diamondback rattler, a coral snake, enough scorpions for everyone, black widows and these freaky little fuckers called cow killers. Those little bastards are so cute you just want to pet them. They are velvety looking and furry little ant looking things (I think they are actually wasps). And while I've never been bitten by one, I was around someone who was and that thing looked mighty painful. The scream was enough to make me hope I never run across one again.

Snakes don't really bother me at all. They are pretty evasive anyway. Now those scorpions are aggressive assholes and they hurt like hell. Like a nasty wasp sting.

But, I'd take all of those any day over roaches. Bleh. Those are the grossest animals on this earth. I would pick up a rattlesnake with my dick before I'd touch a roach. Those are nasty, diseased beasts who have no place on this earth. They are pure filth, and not the good kind. Ugh. I shiver just thinking about them.
 
My yard seems to be a haven for venomous snakes and other goodies. I've had the pleasure of a water moccasin (in the water behind our house), a huge eastern diamondback rattler, a coral snake, enough scorpions for everyone, black widows and these freaky little fuckers called cow killers.

Wow, all we have around here are squirrels, chipmunks, racoons, deer and the occasional coyote or fox. Woodland creatures seem a hell of a lot nicer. For the most part cute and fluffy. I guess the cold weather we get may just be worth it if it means I don't have to worry about scorpions or black widows.

My uncle has flying squirrels living in his backyard, those things are friggin' sweet to watch.
 
We have a few furry critters too. Much cuter. We have had a few deer lately, which is not really common for us where I live. I've had a fox just outside our neighbourhood too. The best thing I've seen was an otter back in the water. That was neat. They are really cute. Playful.

We also have geese. I was kind of excited when they started coming around. They were kind of cool. Come in the winter. Leave in the summer. Except the Canadian geese have been like all the other old things that come to Florida and they just stay and cross the road really slowly. Those bastards are mean. They are mean to each other, mean to the ducks and mean to me. The little goslings (????) are way cute. But man, try to feed them and those momma gooses bitch face me really quickly. They start making this awful noise and run at you with this evil look in their eyes. I wish those arseholes would move back to Canada.
 
We also have geese. I was kind of excited when they started coming around. They were kind of cool. Come in the winter. Leave in the summer. Except the Canadian geese have been like all the other old things that come to Florida and they just stay and cross the road really slowly. Those bastards are mean. They are mean to each other, mean to the ducks and mean to me. The little goslings (????) are way cute. But man, try to feed them and those momma gooses bitch face me really quickly. They start making this awful noise and run at you with this evil look in their eyes. I wish those arseholes would move back to Canada.
God. Me, too. Geese are filthy, filthy creatures.
 
We have a few furry critters too. Much cuter. We have had a few deer lately, which is not really common for us where I live. I've had a fox just outside our neighbourhood too. The best thing I've seen was an otter back in the water. That was neat. They are really cute. Playful.

We also have geese. I was kind of excited when they started coming around. They were kind of cool. Come in the winter. Leave in the summer. Except the Canadian geese have been like all the other old things that come to Florida and they just stay and cross the road really slowly. Those bastards are mean. They are mean to each other, mean to the ducks and mean to me. The little goslings (????) are way cute. But man, try to feed them and those momma gooses bitch face me really quickly. They start making this awful noise and run at you with this evil look in their eyes. I wish those arseholes would move back to Canada.

Were you still referring to the Canada geese, or the other, older, "snow-birds" that migrate back to Ontario and Quebec in the springtime?
 
Wow, all we have around here are squirrels, chipmunks, racoons, deer and the occasional coyote or fox. Woodland creatures seem a hell of a lot nicer. For the most part cute and fluffy. I guess the cold weather we get may just be worth it if it means I don't have to worry about scorpions or black widows.

My uncle has flying squirrels living in his backyard, those things are friggin' sweet to watch.

Up here we have all sorts of critters, and lately, thanks to the economy, an upsurge in the two-legged varmints as well.

What makes me smile is the coyote population...towns restrict hunting and trapping, claiming coyotes are not varmints, they have a right to exist! Now, after the umpteenth report of a small dog being snatched, sometimes off the leash, we hear "The police have guns, can't they shoot them?"

I cannot help but smile...
 
I must have been really bad, Santa brought me the flu for Christmas. Any thoughts on cold meds? I never get sick so am sort of at a loss, but feel like crap on a cracker.
 
God. Me, too. Geese are filthy, filthy creatures.

It's like they have lines on their necks where you are just supposed to chop with some type of samurai sword. I'm sure all the animal lovers will try to defend these buggers, but anyone who does so obviously has never had them invade their yard.

Plus, those ass bandits eat my blueberries!!!!
 
All this bitching about animals and I come home and there is a bald eagle flying about in my back yard. I mean, he was way up in the sky, it wasn't like he was perched on one of my little trees or something. So that's not something I see every day. What an awesome bird. He looks so badass.
 
God. Me, too. Geese are filthy, filthy creatures.

They killed a man up here this summer. I kid you not. A guy was in a rowboat and was attacked by geese, fell out of the boat, and drowned because the geese kept attacking him in the water. I hate those things.
 
They killed a man up here this summer. I kid you not. A guy was in a rowboat and was attacked by geese, fell out of the boat, and drowned because the geese kept attacking him in the water. I hate those things.

WHAT!?!?! Are you kidding? Was he sitting in his rowboat eating Fois Gras?
 
I must have been really bad, Santa brought me the flu for Christmas. Any thoughts on cold meds? I never get sick so am sort of at a loss, but feel like crap on a cracker.
I've been sick a lot this past year; I use Advil Cold and Sinus and Mucinex. Make sure it's the plain Mucinex without anything added. You don't want to overdose on cold meds.
 
This should be the next tourism ad...and when everyone leaves and the property prices dive, I'll swoop in...excellent!

On a more serious note, I'm glad you're ok...sounds a wee bit dangerous in your backyard. Instead of mowing, did you ever consider the 'scorched-earth' option? :)
We *do* live on a lake. LOL It's not all that dangerous; I'm more of a danger to the snakes than they are to me. Well, not me exactly - hubby. He's my weapon of choice when dealing with creepy crawlies. :D

It can't be too bad here; the snowbirds keep coming back.
 
My yard seems to be a haven for venomous snakes and other goodies. I've had the pleasure of a water moccasin (in the water behind our house), a huge eastern diamondback rattler, a coral snake, enough scorpions for everyone, black widows and these freaky little fuckers called cow killers. Those little bastards are so cute you just want to pet them. They are velvety looking and furry little ant looking things (I think they are actually wasps). And while I've never been bitten by one, I was around someone who was and that thing looked mighty painful. The scream was enough to make me hope I never run across one again.

Snakes don't really bother me at all. They are pretty evasive anyway. Now those scorpions are aggressive assholes and they hurt like hell. Like a nasty wasp sting.

But, I'd take all of those any day over roaches. Bleh. Those are the grossest animals on this earth. I would pick up a rattlesnake with my dick before I'd touch a roach. Those are nasty, diseased beasts who have no place on this earth. They are pure filth, and not the good kind. Ugh. I shiver just thinking about them.
We have an otter living here, too! They're frickin' adorable!

I'd never heard of cow killers until you said that. We don't have them (that I know of) but fire ants? Whooooo momma! Those little fuckers are vicious!
 
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