Why cant men talk with each other about...
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WaxNWane
Hare puller
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I'll talk about anything with friends - I'll talk about what I like, what I don't, what I do...but I won't talk about anyone I've had sex with specifically - even if my friends don't know her. Just seems like the details, especially the things that she liked or wanted or whatever, are private. I'm sorta coy about it, I suppose.
Sixth
Saturnine
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Men are competitive but not in that insidious form of social competition which inspires many women to engage in such conversations.
Men are more likely to be competitive, well “insecurely protective” rather, when it comes to their own sexual prowess. This is why men aren’t likely to swap details even if they wanted to – they’d run the risk of being vulnerable to one-upmanship.
Men are more likely to be competitive, well “insecurely protective” rather, when it comes to their own sexual prowess. This is why men aren’t likely to swap details even if they wanted to – they’d run the risk of being vulnerable to one-upmanship.
Shaq
The Libertine
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Yes....
One of my friends and I just had a conversation about a situation...
He's really into voyeurism and met a couple online who would tell him of some of there sexual encounters. The guy who I'm guessing is bi has asked that my friend, we'll call him Jose Tanto just cause I like that name, join but my friend is not comfortable with guy on guy sex. But he still wants to watch so he's wondering if he should turn down the invitation all together.
We talk about the same stuff chicks do I guess....at least my friends and I do....
One of my friends and I just had a conversation about a situation...
He's really into voyeurism and met a couple online who would tell him of some of there sexual encounters. The guy who I'm guessing is bi has asked that my friend, we'll call him Jose Tanto just cause I like that name, join but my friend is not comfortable with guy on guy sex. But he still wants to watch so he's wondering if he should turn down the invitation all together.
We talk about the same stuff chicks do I guess....at least my friends and I do....
Dougy
Literotica Guru
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In my experience, no...not a bit. Most of the male friends that I have are completely objectifiers. They will point out that a woman has a nice ass or 'rack', but absolutely nothing personal.
I even tried to talk to a friend about it when he mentioned that he and his wife weren't having sex anymore, but I got nothing more out of him. Instead he pointed out a woman that he works with and said 'I think she wants to fuck me. I'd do it if I wasn't afraid (my wife) would find out.'
Maybe I need some new friends...
I even tried to talk to a friend about it when he mentioned that he and his wife weren't having sex anymore, but I got nothing more out of him. Instead he pointed out a woman that he works with and said 'I think she wants to fuck me. I'd do it if I wasn't afraid (my wife) would find out.'
Maybe I need some new friends...
Star of Penumbra
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Because to discuss something like sex with a friend takes personal strength, which, unfortunateloy, too many men are without because they're so caught up in physical strength, trying to impress each other, and waving thier dicks about that they have no time for personal development.
On the other hand, they might just be uncomfortable about it. But I think it's the former.
On the other hand, they might just be uncomfortable about it. But I think it's the former.
Kitte
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Great responses guys. Keep them coming. I have found a new freedom with talking about my sexuality on a more personal level with my online women friends. But I also have very close relationships in RL where I feel free to say almost anything... I really wish for you men that you could have something like that.
Is it an issue of wondering whether or not someone will question your manliness, will they think you a perv??
Is it an issue of wondering whether or not someone will question your manliness, will they think you a perv??
Dougy
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I have wondered about this subject myself...
With my friends at least, it is not a question of thinking them a perv. One of them is quite willing to point out what a perv he is, but still does not reveal anything personally of a sexual nature. Perhaps it is the negative socialization that we have grown up with against homosexuality. There may just be a subtext in the vilification of gay men which tells men that not only should they not be gay, but they should not put themselves in a position to consider sexuality in a real way if another man is present.
With my friends at least, it is not a question of thinking them a perv. One of them is quite willing to point out what a perv he is, but still does not reveal anything personally of a sexual nature. Perhaps it is the negative socialization that we have grown up with against homosexuality. There may just be a subtext in the vilification of gay men which tells men that not only should they not be gay, but they should not put themselves in a position to consider sexuality in a real way if another man is present.
Ezarc
Grumpy Doms Union 361
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What about kinks? I don't know any of my friend that talk about anything more spicy than spanking. My friends have never talked about rimming, bondage, or anything that might not be construde as kinky or less than a hundred percent masculine.
Take Care and Lust Always,
Ezarc
Take Care and Lust Always,
Ezarc
The Squid King
Spineless Tyrant
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I prefer to take the gentlemen's route. A gentlemen never tells, he just confirms or denies. That is how my friends and I talk about sex, if the subject ever even comes up, which it rarely does.
RastaPope
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My best buddy and I talk about sex, but within limits. Hot broads, she has a nice ass, she has a great rack, i wouldn't throw her out of bed for eating crackers, etc etc. And after one of us has done a girl, we'll tell the other so, but not with great detail...she gives great head, she wanted it in the ass, she's such a slut, etc etc.. That's are far as it should go between guys.
Khadgar
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i talk with my friends all the time about sex, mind we don't go into "this is the best way to use your tongue, with a curve" or anything like that, we don't examine and pick apart the thing, but we talk about it, swap expieriences and techniques.... yeah, i find there's no problem with it, was a little suprized when my friend dedicated his 69 with his GF to me.... but whatever lol
Dougy
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The question for me is why does there seem to be so little middle ground. With my friends either solitary comments are dished out with no follow up, or it is done in an almost comically 'manlike' way (no offense meant RastaPope). There seems to be nothing in between. Is this just because they don't want to seem unmanly? Do they feel they are protecting trade secrets?
The Squid King
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RastaPope said:
That sums it up in a nutshell.
Shaq
The Libertine
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RastaPope said:
Interesting...since I'm not gay I can't recall any instances when I felt gay...often it seems that the situation of two men talking deeply about sex is labeled gay and men are less apt to share with another man for fear of the label...
I just don't see how talking with another human being about a subject of interest can be gay...or straight for that matter...it's a discussion...I'd talk with a robot if it would talk back...
Kitte
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RastaPope said:
I guess that really does sum it up. I don't knwo what I would do if I did not have my girlfriends to validate some of my experiences. Or to give me hints and tip. For example Vixenshe's spanking thread.
http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=97685
Notice the way we interact and confess to one another? Do you men not do that at all??
*edited to say Shaq I admire you and the relationship you have with your friends!
Kitte said:
I know that my honey doesn't talk much with his friends about sex with me. And I think that's a respect thing. His friends all know me, and he wouldn't want them to know all of our intimate details. And I appreciate it, to some extent. But at the same time, I really wish some of his friends did know about it...
wouldn't mind tempting a few.
Wow, just had a thought how neat it would be to eavesdrop on some guys talking about the ins and outs, hows and whys of their sexuality and what they like about women. Not play by play details or descriptions of ladies they liked but more about they're own sexuality and how they feel about women in general.
