What makes you stop reading a story?

luvthedesserts

luvherdesserts
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May 23, 2012
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I’m sure we've all clicked on a story and read through one or two paragraphs and cringed. Then as gently as you could, backed up to try and find something more to your own personal tastes. I openly admit I’ve written a few of those paragraphs. I’ve even plowed through and written an entire story or two that qualifies under the “For the love of God, why?” category. I’m not ashamed. Not really. Maybe a little. Shut up. Don’t judge me.

Grammar and spelling, aside. I know some of you can’t put those two aside. I accept that. Personally, I allow them and don’t really mind as long as I can understand the gist of what the writer is trying to say. I’m more interested in what you roll your eyes at and decide it’s more entertaining to vacuum or pick a fight with your spouse or partner or that really big guy that creeps you out when you walk by him on the street.

My personal pet peeves that get me after several hundred stories are as follows:

1. The anaconda penis that has to wrap around the guy’s leg in order to fit in his gym shorts. And when said, anaconda is mentioned, he feigns ignorance at its size.

2. The quadruple Ds on a girl under five feet tall. Poor girl would need to have a shopping cart to carry those around. That and a chiropractor on call.

3. The you’re so hot no you’re so hot, dude do you really think we should be doing this, I mean jeez dialogue. A bit preteen in my opinion. I’ll add porno dialogue in as well. Porno dialogue isn’t even fun to see in pornos. Not that I’ve ever seen any. Shut up. Don’t judge me

4. The proverbial cum-slut. The woman who does a triple gainer off the high dive to land face first on the cock she just has to taste. I’ve heard of such mythical creatures. I’m sure they exist on both sides of the aisle. But is every virgin out there, that thirsty?

5. The over descriptive starting paragraph of the characters’ dimensions. Unless you’re a bra salesman or just the perv we all are, how do you know the exact measurements? Tease me a little. Be creative. I want to know, but in a natural way. Like: “Wow, Sis. Your tits are way bigger than Mom’s. I can barely hold them in two hands. I think I just sprained my thumb.”

I’m not trying to be a snob. I’m simply trying to find out what to avoid in future stories. None of the above examples alone make me walk away from a story, but if they add up within the first few minutes of reading, I do have to go take a walk in a park at midnight with all my jewelry hanging around my neck to teach myself a lesson about choices in life. Oh yea, I know that last sentence was long. I’m hung that way. In the literary sense, that is.

So? Opinions? Anyone? Anyone at all?
 
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Sorry, but regardless how interesting the first paragraphs are, errors will pull me away.
 
There are many slangy, puerile words that turn me off such as dick, boobies, nuts, weenier, jugs, etc... Basically anything that a third grader would say. :D
 
I’m sure all of us have clicked on a story and read through one or two paragraphs and cringed. Then as gently as you could, backed up to try and find something more to your own personal tastes. ...

So? Opinions? Anyone? Anyone at all?

Things that will usually stop me reading immediately:

- Story introduces characters by giving their measurements
- Story goes stampeding for the sex without taking the time to get me interested in the characters first
- Author uses story to push obnoxious personal views (I probably don't want to hear you ranting about your Evil Ex, even if you change their name)
 
That point in any story where you realize a guy is going to be humiliated while his wife screws another man. And about 75% of the time I'll stop if the wants to watch his wife get screwed. Also any story seeming written by a prepubescent child.
 
I'm really fussy about the stories I read. I'll probably open ten for every one that I finish, and that's after pre-screening based on title, blurb, rating and number of chapters, so as you can imagine I have quite an extensive list here. I'll try to list them in approximate order of how quick it will make me close the story.

1. The story is only 1 page long
2. The story is more than 10 pages long (usually, sometimes I'll persist if it looks very interesting).
3. The spelling, grammar, syntax and structure are clearly not up to scratch.
4. A list of measurements right off the bat (as other people have described)
5. A setting that I immediately recognise as unrealistic (some people don't care about realism, but it's something I need)
6. Obvious and clumsy attempts to circumnavigate the age restriction (I have no moral objection to 16-year-olds having sex, but I don't want to hear about two characters who are '18' but still 'blossoming' virgins at high school, living with their parents with a 10pm curfew).
7. A nosedive straight into sex with little backdrop or justification, unless it is done in a way which piques my interest.
8. Unrealistic body parts, like a super-long penis or super-large breasts with no real justification.
9. It becomes clear that the author has little or no sexual experience and so gets really fundamental things about sex wrong (happens more than you think)
10. A bland and formulaic plot that I have seen a million times before, with little evidence that there will be any 'twist'.
11. Characters that I don't connect with, or find interesting, in any way.
12. Characters that are inconsistent with themselves.
13. The story descends into just a series of sex scenes with little/no plot in between.
14. The story contains sexual elements that are a major turnoff for me (sometimes this is clear from the start, other times it just pops up out of nowhere midway through the story).
15. Sudden major redefinitions of a character with no justification (e.g. the classic 'woman discovers she is bisexual' half way through the story).
16. The story stops really developing and just turns into a series of contrived excuses for characters to have sex.

I've probably missed some :)
 
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Usually three paragraphs or so are enough to let me know whether I like the writer's style well enough to go through with reading the whole thing. I either like it or I don't - it's that simple - although I too am turned off by the use of third-grade slang. (Great word for that, by the way.) Also, if the sex is just too abrupt or if it's ONLY about the big event, I'm probably not going to like the story.

I'll usually make an exception to my three-paragraph rule if it's an author whose work I've enjoyed in the past. Everybody gets off to a bad start sometimes, after all.
 
There are many slangy, puerile words that turn me off such as dick, boobies, nuts, weenier, jugs, etc... Basically anything that a third grader would say. :D

To my mind, it's acceptable ONLY to indicate the character of the character or a type of argot used ina particular place.



Things that will usually stop me reading immediately:

- Story introduces characters by giving their measurements

How true.
But I have heard girls actually talk about the 'size of his willy', so I guess it depends upon who's saying it.



I'm really fussy about the stories I read. I'll probably open ten for every one that I finish, and that's after pre-screening based on title, blurb, rating and number of chapters, so as you can imagine I have quite an extensive list here.

15. Sudden major redefinitions of a character with no justification (e.g. the classic 'woman discovers she is bisexual' half way through the story).
16. The story stops really developing and just turns into a series of contrived excuses for characters to have sex.
I've probably missed some :)

I quite agree.
 
My test is this, WHEN I BECOME AWARE OF HOW FAR I'VE READ. If it seems like I've been reading page one for an hour, or if I discover I've already blown past page 50. Some writing is so good its errors are no problem. Readers notice errors when the writing is poor.

The other test is, DO I WANT TO BE DONE READING THE STORY. Is reading the story an exercise in self discipline, like dieting, or doing 50 crunches.
 
Like many others, I am put off by stories -- whether written in first person or third person -- that jump write to a laundry list description. The "Let me tell you about myself..." type of thing. I understand they're trying to get the information out there, and sometimes it's appropriate to the story, but for me, it's one strike against.

A subcategory here, or corollary or whatever, are the stories where a character says they don't care about their appearance, and then proceed to give a minute description of their body. Big contradiction right there.

I also dislike the 6'6" ridiculously-endowed man and the 5'0" ridiculously-endowed woman. Although just on the height issue, I've corresponded with several women writers who in fact are in those situations -- they are the petite ones in a family of tall men, and so that's what they are used to and find they like. So art imitates life, sometimes. :)

The women who love to suck cock more than anything else in the whole world (!!) make me roll my eyes and click back.

I click off any story that uses a "you" construction, which is usually an "I tell you" story; first person rather than second. Either way, I don't like it.

I dislike stories with women who turn to mush when the guy looks at them, especially if they have been established as reasonably well-adjusted, independent and strong women. That'll have me clicking back.

I also tend to click off any story longer than four pages, but that's on me, not the author. I don't have time for more than that, and often not time for even those four pages.
 
I also tend to click off any story longer than four pages, but that's on me, not the author. I don't have time for more than that, and often not time for even those four pages.

This isn't a criticism, I'm just curious. Would you read a six page story if it was in three chapters of two pages each (maybe on the basis you could read a chapter each day) or would you just not read a story that length at all?
 
This isn't a criticism, I'm just curious. Would you read a six page story if it was in three chapters of two pages each (maybe on the basis you could read a chapter each day) or would you just not read a story that length at all?

No, I would read a story that length or longer if it was broken up into shorter pieces, and I have. This is just one of those areas where everyone is different, b/c everyone has different claims on their time. I'm a SAHM, but I'm home with a 4yo, and she goes to preschool three days a week, and we do other things, and then there's the usual cooking/cleaning/errands. That doesn't leave me much time to sit and read.

But some people are retired, or are home without kids, or just prioritize and manage their time differently and so can read more.

That's probably why I hit the forums many times per day (one could ask, after all, why I do that instead of writing ;) ) -- I can scan quickly and write a quick reply or comment if I want, and it takes far less time.

Also, I have written long stories myself. I generally post them in blocks of 8-12k words, which is about 3-4 Lit pages, so I try not to ask for more than I can give. Contest entries are the exception.
 
I have very low tolerance for lack of story and weak characterization. Give me two interesting, real, flawed people struggling to overcome the obstacles that stand between them, and I am hooked. If instead i get a misogynistic screed, or boring characters, or interminable "and next I fucked this other girl" story, or a story that has the leads get together on page one but just describes sexual variations for another 30 pages, and I am backtracking fast.

I also have low tolerance for certain writing styles. I can tolerate spelling and formatting problems better than dead prose. I remember one story which actually had a decent central conflict, but the narrative voice described everything in the exact same adjective, adjective, noun structure: "pulsing, throbbing, member", "heaving, panting, breasts", with absolutely no variation; a dozen times per paragraph. By page two I was ready to rip out my eyeballs.
 
There are many slangy, puerile words that turn me off such as dick, boobies, nuts, weenier, jugs, etc... Basically anything that a third grader would say. :D

If it’s the narrator I agree. If it’s a character being a smartass, and yes I have one that says “boobies” to be funny, than I allow it. I throw too much purple prose in there too. It does limit me to calling it what it is. And boob is just too puerile as you put it. I much prefer breast or tit. But some women have mentioned breast seems too clinical.


I'm really fussy about the stories I read. I'll probably open ten for every one that I finish, and that's after pre-screening based on title, blurb, rating and number of chapters, so as you can imagine I have quite an extensive list here. I'll try to list them in approximate order of how quick it will make me close the story.

I've probably missed some :)

So, you read food labels and that’s about it, huh? LOL

My test is this, WHEN I BECOME AWARE OF HOW FAR I'VE READ. If it seems like I've been reading page one for an hour, or if I discover I've already blown past page 50. Some writing is so good its errors are no problem. Readers notice errors when the writing is poor.

The other test is, DO I WANT TO BE DONE READING THE STORY. Is reading the story an exercise in self discipline, like dieting, or doing 50 crunches.

I do that one quite often. I’ve stopped mid-sentence to scroll down to see how many pages are left and then have an internal dialogue on whether or not I really care if the young lady who just lost her virginity is really going to go through with blowing the entire faculty at Do-we-screw-um University.

The women who love to suck cock more than anything else in the whole world (!!) make me roll my eyes and click back.

I dislike stories with women who turn to mush when the guy looks at them, especially if they have been established as reasonably well-adjusted, independent and strong women. That'll have me clicking back.

So, most romances where the plucky independent I don’t need a man to save me heroine becomes a flighty nervous quivering ball of insecurities any time Dirk Longmember walks through the door, is out?

I’ll also add the guy molesting a girl in her sleep and thinking she’s a slut for it. Not sure how she qualifies, but maybe that’s just me.

And of course, “the cum bath.” Nothing shows love like using a girl like an old tube sock. I’m sure a pearl necklace is a nice kink for some, just not me. But now I’m falling into personal preferences. Whoops.
 
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Most of my instant back-click triggers have been listed already. One I want to emphasize is the first person "you" story (I can't even call it a second person narrative--in 99.9% of the cases it just isn't). To me, that is more annoying than Wolverine's claws scraping a chalkboard.

The other item I want to expand upon is the implausible plot, or what I call the descent into silliness. I like a good workplace story, especially where it involves one person using their authority or power to take advantage of another. But keep it real, folks. Don't try to convince me that the boss is requiring the secretary to show up for work every day in a string bikini, and that she has to spend all morning sucking the dicks of every male employee in the firm. Nobody is going to do that. Nobody. No business can operate that way. I realize that stories are fantasies, but if your fantasy is silly, I'm not going to read it.

Another one that will usually get me to back click is the story that starts out with the sex scene, and then jumps back in time to explain how they got together. If I don't know who they are when they're already in bed, telling me afterward does nothing for me. I like a little foreplay before I start banging.

Also, I hate the stories where the characters have no names. I don't need to know everything right away, but if all you're ever going to tell me is "He" and "She", then I'm "Annoyed."

Finally, I get hugely disappointed when an author recycles the same material over and over. I discovered an author about six months ago who wrote a very nice story that moved along at very brisk pace. Three months later that author had another story up with a similar setting. Cool, I thought, this author has a niche. But the story wasn't just similar in genre, it was almost identical to the previous story with some minor changes in the set up. A third story went up about a month ago, which once again mimicked the previous two. Now I'm done with this author.
 
Penn Lady's post touches on another one for me. I am not opposed to strong women who get weak in the knees around the right guy, as long as they don't lose their strength. I hate passive, weak female characters who simply drive some guy batty just by being beautiful and having a submissive demeanor. I think I am in the minority in detesting that type of story, however. The one time I wrote a character like that she ended up being an abuse victim and the realization knocked the main character on his ass. It wasn't my most popular story. I will read about a psychotic over a doormat any day.

Yes, I have issues.

(edited to add an omitted "not" that completely changed the meaning of the first sentence)
 
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Depends on how bad the grammar and other errors are. We all have our threshold. Sometimes it will stop me in my tracks and other times it is okay. There is also a line with giant boobs and cocks and the cumslut factor. Some would say that my stories cross the line, but I try to counterbalance that with realism.
 
Most of my instant back-click triggers have been listed already. One I want to emphasize is the first person "you" story (I can't even call it a second person narrative--in 99.9% of the cases it just isn't). To me, that is more annoying than Wolverine's claws scraping a chalkboard.

The other item I want to expand upon is the implausible plot, or what I call the descent into silliness. I like a good workplace story, especially where it involves one person using their authority or power to take advantage of another. But keep it real, folks. Don't try to convince me that the boss is requiring the secretary to show up for work every day in a string bikini, and that she has to spend all morning sucking the dicks of every male employee in the firm. Nobody is going to do that. Nobody. No business can operate that way. I realize that stories are fantasies, but if your fantasy is silly, I'm not going to read it.

Another one that will usually get me to back click is the story that starts out with the sex scene, and then jumps back in time to explain how they got together. If I don't know who they are when they're already in bed, telling me afterward does nothing for me. I like a little foreplay before I start banging.

Also, I hate the stories where the characters have no names. I don't need to know everything right away, but if all you're ever going to tell me is "He" and "She", then I'm "Annoyed."

Finally, I get hugely disappointed when an author recycles the same material over and over. I discovered an author about six months ago who wrote a very nice story that moved along at very brisk pace. Three months later that author had another story up with a similar setting. Cool, I thought, this author has a niche. But the story wasn't just similar in genre, it was almost identical to the previous story with some minor changes in the set up. A third story went up about a month ago, which once again mimicked the previous two. Now I'm done with this author.

I’ve tried to write in the first person, never the second. It doesn’t work for me. My personality eventually finds it’s way in and then it just turns to quirky idiotic observations about cheese graters and why nipples never look at the same thing at the same time.

I do tend to get annoyed with, I said. I I I I I.

What’s foreplay? Is that when the guy licks his eyebrows and the girl decides she needs a lot more protein in her diet?



Penn Lady's post touches on another one for me. I am opposed to strong women who get weak in the knees around the right guy, as long as they don't lose their strength. I hate passive, weak female characters who simply drive some guy batty just by being beautiful and having a submissive demeanor. I think I am in the minority in detesting that type of story, however. The one time I wrote a character like that she ended up being an abuse victim and the realization knocked the main character on his ass. It wasn't my most popular story. I will read about a psychotic over a doormat any day.

Yes, I have issues.

I don’t get the submission doormat thing either. I don’t like taking care of another pet. Or being the pet. Now, the shy but lovable is okay. Or the, “Damn it, I hate the way you make me feel,” thing. It’s a personal preference for me.
 
I have a pretty vivid imagination, but if I cannot suspend disbelief, I will not finish the story.
 
Most of my instant back-click triggers have been listed already. One I want to emphasize is the first person "you" story (I can't even call it a second person narrative--in 99.9% of the cases it just isn't). To me, that is more annoying than Wolverine's claws scraping a chalkboard.

The other item I want to expand upon is the implausible plot, or what I call the descent into silliness. I like a good workplace story, especially where it involves one person using their authority or power to take advantage of another. But keep it real, folks. Don't try to convince me that the boss is requiring the secretary to show up for work every day in a string bikini, and that she has to spend all morning sucking the dicks of every male employee in the firm. Nobody is going to do that. Nobody. No business can operate that way. I realize that stories are fantasies, but if your fantasy is silly, I'm not going to read it.

Another one that will usually get me to back click is the story that starts out with the sex scene, and then jumps back in time to explain how they got together. If I don't know who they are when they're already in bed, telling me afterward does nothing for me. I like a little foreplay before I start banging.

Also, I hate the stories where the characters have no names. I don't need to know everything right away, but if all you're ever going to tell me is "He" and "She", then I'm "Annoyed."

Finally, I get hugely disappointed when an author recycles the same material over and over. I discovered an author about six months ago who wrote a very nice story that moved along at very brisk pace. Three months later that author had another story up with a similar setting. Cool, I thought, this author has a niche. But the story wasn't just similar in genre, it was almost identical to the previous story with some minor changes in the set up. A third story went up about a month ago, which once again mimicked the previous two. Now I'm done with this author.

You'd appreciate a guy I worked for 25 years ago. Balding, with a mullet, he was filthy rich. He lived on the beach but had an apartment at the office, and quite often he drug female employees off to the apartment for what he called 'protein breaks.' All of them kinda pouted about it, and all of them went, and all of them stayed. Most were married.

Before that I worked for a guy who screwed female employees atop their desks. I witnessed one episode.

I think its common.
 
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many of the things listed above plus

oral directly after anal sex
rape as the main theme of the story
anal sex without preparation (especially lack of lube)
guys calling their partners (whether female or male) for bitch or slut - except in a few role play situations or as a rare occurrence in the heat of the moment
too embellished descriptions
virgins or very inexperienced girls / guys who come immediately just by being fucked
 
You'd appreciate a guy I worked for 25 years ago. Balding, with a mullet, he was filthy rich. He lived on the beach but had an apartment at the office, and quite often he drug female employees off to the apartment for what he called 'protein breaks.' All of them kinda pouted about it, and all of them went, and all of them stayed. Most were married.

Before that I worked for a guy who screwed female employees atop their desks. I witnessed one episode.

I think its common.

I like reading fictional accounts much more than true versions. True stories are lawsuits waiting to happen.

At my first job out of college there were no attractive women anywhere in the office. My boss explained to me that the office is for work, not recreation. Better to keep out the temptation. He's the most successful person I know.

My next job had a partner who made an offensive remark to or about women every 30 seconds. Everyone knew he was all talk, however, and would never follow through if given the opportunity. He's still in business.

I had a buddy who was banging his receptionist on his desk after hours. It went on for six months, until he started up with a secretary in another office. I guess he could handle only one mistress at a time. The receptionist got pissed off and fucked his partner on his desk, then told him about it and quit. That office folded within a year.

A few years ago I worked with a firm where every woman was young and gorgeous. My partner claimed he wasn't fucking any of them, but I know better. That office closed within two years.

I like reading those stories, but I just don't think they turn out well in real life.
 
Writing things like "she had a really good orgasm." Pretty much if there is more telling than showing I'll stop reading. I'm sure that's everyone here.

I don't like it when characters have sex, or something significant happens and sex, and then the characters move on like it nothing happened. That's is actually kinda creepy.

Also, like most people mentioned here, when there isn't enough character introduction, and you can tell the author wants you to be interested in the characters. What I'm trying to say is, are you just writing a quick porn-ish sex scene? I get that. There's a place for that. I wouldn't expect much from the characters if you wrote that.

If you're writing and Erotic story, however...
 
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