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What have you stuck up your ass?

Wife is out of town so this morning I had to replentish the food and such. I hate grocery shopping so I decided to make it interesting.
I read for awhile some takes at "LIT" and got nice and worked up. I inserted an expanable vibrating butt plug into my ass, pumped a couple times so it wouldn't slip out and threw on a pair of shorts a wife beater and flip flops and headed for the grocery store. while walking through the aisles it was actually fun for the first time doing a chore that I disliked.
Every once in a while I would hit the vibrate button while asking for assistance in finding something. I was a bit leary wondering if anyone could hear the vibrating noise but assured myself I was safe from detection. My only fear was I might accidently hit the air-release knob and the thing would deflate and fall right out of me and down my shorts pant leg. That didn't happen. What did happen is I was getting a rather visible erection and half way through the journey thought I should abandon this venture. Left my half full cart and headed home to where I have the vibrator full blast and in the privacy of my home I can finish this note and sure I will cum buckets. I need both hands now, so thanks for listening and happy jerking to all!!
 
brightondream said:
Wife is out of town so this morning I had to replentish the food and such. I hate grocery shopping so I decided to make it interesting.
I read for awhile some takes at "LIT" and got nice and worked up. I inserted an expanable vibrating butt plug into my ass, pumped a couple times so it wouldn't slip out and threw on a pair of shorts a wife beater and flip flops and headed for the grocery store. while walking through the aisles it was actually fun for the first time doing a chore that I disliked.
Every once in a while I would hit the vibrate button while asking for assistance in finding something. I was a bit leary wondering if anyone could hear the vibrating noise but assured myself I was safe from detection. My only fear was I might accidently hit the air-release knob and the thing would deflate and fall right out of me and down my shorts pant leg. That didn't happen. What did happen is I was getting a rather visible erection and half way through the journey thought I should abandon this venture. Left my half full cart and headed home to where I have the vibrator full blast and in the privacy of my home I can finish this note and sure I will cum buckets. I need both hands now, so thanks for listening and happy jerking to all!!
Click to expand...

I am so sure your going to have a powerful orgasm! Go for it, Dear! Feel those vibration in your ass and let the sensation spread through your body. You'll probably only have to stroke just lightly and your will be spraying buckets of cum all over. Be sure and lick it all up from the back of your hand! Have fun! :kiss:
 
Jenna2641 said:
I am so sure your going to have a powerful orgasm! Go for it, Dear! Feel those vibration in your ass and let the sensation spread through your body. You'll probably only have to stroke just lightly and your will be spraying buckets of cum all over. Be sure and lick it all up from the back of your hand! Have fun! :kiss:
Click to expand...

And just how did you know that I would lick it up from the back of my hand??? Are you watching me?
 
brightondream said:
And just how did you know that I would lick it up from the back of my hand??? Are you watching me?
Click to expand...

;) Who knows what lusts lurk within the hearts of men? Only the Jenna knows! :D

Seriously, I enjoy lapping up that salty concoction off the back of my own hand every time! Yummy! :p
 
Well lets see

a variety of butt plugs, one was huge, several different dildos of varying size, a couple of hot dogs, a bananna and once two but got in a hurry and that hurt!, cucumbers, faucet handle, plunger handle, bed post and i am sure there was more.
 
Sex toys of various denominations- glass, metal, silicone. Butt plugs, of course, phallic vibrators, doule dongs ( a couple times shared;)) and my wife's hand, but only up to the thumb ( dammit). Her strap on, too- but I don't know if that counts- technically, she stuck it in my ass:D. A pair of those weighted vaginal balls on a string ( the ones with the little balls inside that knock around:)) and yes, I tied something to the string first!:eek: First object ever was a shampoo bottle- prolly 1.5" or so. It hurt, I was stupid- won't tell the age. Glad I didn't quit there:D
 
Candy for my fanny

My favorite is a grape or strawberry "Super Blo-Pop." As I work it in and out it begins to desolve and fill my ass with sweet juice. I can acheive an orgasm in my ass from the sensation of pulling right to the edge and then using my ass muscles to pull it back in. Pulling it out and licking the juice off or sucking on it could only be compared to sucking and licking a cock that has just come out of my ass.
 
Let's see....cucumbers, plunger handles, ice, strap on and a dildo. Best time was I went outside and grabbed a big ol gardening rake. The handle is just the right size and I propped it up so I coul could get on all 4's and let it slide in and out of my ass.
 
Complete (?) List

My fingers, a vibrator, candles, a butt plug, lots of water, cold & warm, a banana, a cucumber (really thick), carrots, a pool cue, a chair leg, other peoples fingers, other mens cocks (sheathed & bareback), dildos. The best was a guy who used me as a booty call, he fucked me so good with his thick 9inch cock & the longest was a long thick candle that almost disappeared!
 
wow...where to start!?!?!?!


It started with the nozzle of my mother's douche bottle YEARS back...then it went to toys (vibes, butt plugs) and after a while I noticed a pair of wooden "nunchucks" I had (when I wanted to be a ninja) seemed to fit up my ass and was neat because I could hold on to them with my foot (by the other one and the cord) and fuck myself pretty well.

The handle of our old Kirby vacuum cleaner had a nice little hook on the end that massaged my prostate rather well, and I had a few nice hands free cums with that!

Being a drummer, I owned a device called a "cabasa" that had a nice handle that worked pretty well, not to mention thick drumsticks and mallets!

Food wise? good sized carrots, and small cukes, not to mention a few hot dogs or sausages (in condoms) in a pinch!

I can usually find objects in the bathroom, one such item was a rather nicely ribbed plunder handle! (that one was great!) I've used my mother in law's curling iron (pretty thick) as well as some things (brushes, thick mascara tubes etc.) I found in her bathroom. One time we were in a hotel, and I used the free shampoo bottle! (I was horny alone and desperate!)

Candles

I think that's it!

wait forgot something...I DID stick a baseball bat up my ass! It was one of those mini bats you get at the pro games! (mine was a Phillies) :)
 
Last edited:
I think I saw a video like that somewhere ---- * shivers*----- very disturbing, as are the eggplant vids I have happened across. Beware the prolapse!:eek:
 
Up my ass...

Dildos...18" double header, John Holmes w/ strap-on, and the 18" Dick Rambone. Biggest real cock was honestly 11 3/4", uncut, very fat and on a 120#, 5'4" Pre-op Trans just starting hormones about 20 years ago when I lived up north. Wish I could find her again :)
 
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