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The Literotica Tag team competition?

Zeb_Carter said:
You're heard of premature ejaculation? Yeah, I don't have that.

I have the exact opposite of that.

It takes me a long time. Now I'm not saying I was constantly thrusting hard for the entire thirty minutes, but I was inside her moving in and out. And it may not have been the speediest thrusting, but it was thrusting.

Don't believe me, too bad, but it is true.
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Dude, I believe you 100% and if that's what works for you and yours - even better!

I've had plenty of marathon sessions and those feel great, so no disrespect. You and yours can do it wrong all you want. (That was a joke, dammit!)

For us, there's a lot of before play going on. I mean, first I have to take off her panties, then she has to scold me for wearing her panties in the first place . . .
 
BuckyDuckman said:
Dude, I believe you 100% and if that's what works for you and yours - even better!

I've had plenty of marathon sessions and those feel great, so no disrespect. You and yours can do it wrong all you want. (That was a joke, dammit!)

For us, there's a lot of before play going on. I mean, first I have to take off her panties, then she has to scold me for wearing her panties in the first place . . .
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We usually only argue over who's weekend it is and who has to ear the collar.
 
So how is the first weekend going?

Do you have your bunnies? Still hashing that out?

How's your style match with your partners?

One thing I've been sensing and this contest proves it is that my approach seems to be a lot different than other people's as to how I get my ideas and what I do with them.
 
lovecraft68 said:
So how is the first weekend going?

Do you have your bunnies? Still hashing that out?

How's your style match with your partners?

One thing I've been sensing and this contest proves it is that my approach seems to be a lot different than other people's as to how I get my ideas and what I do with them.
Click to expand...

LOL My first weekend was taken up by other things. My parents came up last night (can not write with parents around, if only because Mom keeps talking), and Mr Penn is due home today (yay!).

My partner and I are still hashing things out but are close I think.
 
patientlee said:
Now you sound like my 8 y/o. Thinks he's quite a joker. :eek:
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Like my 5yo?

Her: Knock knock.

Me: Who's there?

Her: Cow.

Me: Cow who?

Her: There was a cow on the farm and it ran away and tried to drive a car!

I think she specializes in surreal humor.
 
PennLady said:
Like my 5yo?

Her: Knock knock.

Me: Who's there?

Her: Cow.

Me: Cow who?

Her: There was a cow on the farm and it ran away and tried to drive a car!

I think she specializes in surreal humor.
Click to expand...

I have a 5 y/o boy that would appreciate her joke.
 
patientlee said:
I have a 5 y/o boy that would appreciate her joke.
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Child: why did the baby fall out of the tree?
Adult: I don't know, why did the baby fall out of the Tree?
Child: because it had a hold of the squirrel
... child looks at you waiting.
Adult: Okay, I'll bite. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree?
Child: because it was dead silly (child breaks up laughing and walks away)
 
Please, please, PLEASE!!! I am absolutely BEGGING any and all tag team participants to stop with the bad puns and especially the cow jokes!!! The sad, tragic truth of my life is - I know WA-AAY too many cow jokes and will humiliate myself at the drop of another poor joke to share.

You have been warned. :devil:
 
BuckyDuckman said:
Please, please, PLEASE!!! I am absolutely BEGGING any and all tag team participants to stop with the bad puns and especially the cow jokes!!! The sad, tragic truth of my life is - I know WA-AAY too many cow jokes and will humiliate myself at the drop of another poor joke to share.

You have been warned. :devil:
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That sounds like a request to me.
 
BuckyDuckman said:
Please, please, PLEASE!!! I am absolutely BEGGING any and all tag team participants to stop with the bad puns and especially the cow jokes!!! The sad, tragic truth of my life is - I know WA-AAY too many cow jokes and will humiliate myself at the drop of another poor joke to share.

You have been warned. :devil:
Click to expand...

I find your request udderly ridiculous.
 
My partner and I are underway. This is an awful lot of fun, and the partner is great to work with. Perhaps the methodology if this exercise will help me to avoid the need to write for hours at a time. Writing chunks and then getting feedback precludes writing that way.
 
BuckyDuckman said:
Please, please, PLEASE!!! I am absolutely BEGGING any and all tag team participants to stop with the bad puns and especially the cow jokes!!! The sad, tragic truth of my life is - I know WA-AAY too many cow jokes and will humiliate myself at the drop of another poor joke to share.

You have been warned. :devil:
Click to expand...

Cowabunga, dude.

Don't have a cow, man. ;)
 
A lady from the city and her traveling companion were riding the train through Vermont when she noticed some cows. "What a cute bunch of cows!" she remarked. "Not a bunch, herd", her friend replied. "Heard of what?" "Herd of cows." "Of course I've heard of cows." "No, a cow herd." "What do I care what a cow heard. I have no secrets to keep from a cow!"
 
lovecraft68 said:
I find your request udderly ridiculous.
Click to expand...

Why do cows lie down in the rain?

Why to keep the udder-side dry, of course.



A cow with no legs is ground beef, but what's a cow with three legs?

Lean beef, what else?


Where do cows go on Saturday nights?

To the MOOOOvies


What do cows carry to work?

Their beefcases.


What do you call a cow with a nervous twitch?

Beef jerky.


What do you call a masturbating bull?

Beef-strokin'-off



And the very sad, tragic truth of my life remains - I did NOT have to look up a single one of these on the interwebs - and yes, there are still many more. Careful what you wish for - sometimes you just might get it!
 
BuckyDuckman said:
Why do cows lie down in the rain?

Why to keep the udder-side dry, of course.



A cow with no legs is ground beef, but what's a cow with three legs?

Lean beef, what else?


Where do cows go on Saturday nights?

To the MOOOOvies


What do cows carry to work?

Their beefcases.


What do you call a cow with a nervous twitch?

Beef jerky.


What do you call a masturbating bull?

Beef-strokin'-off



And the very sad, tragic truth of my life remains - I did NOT have to look up a single one of these on the interwebs - and yes, there are still many more. Careful what you wish for - sometimes you just might get it!
Click to expand...

Hey look I feel for you

I'm Polish.

Don;t even get me started on the endless Polish jokes I know.
 
PennLady said:
Cowabunga, dude.

Don't have a cow, man. ;)
Click to expand...



Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work, silly!


What do you call a cow that can't give milk?

A milk dud. And for those who got the answer wrong and initially thought "A bull," I would remind you to NEVER try milking a bull. Sure, if you do, you've made a friend for life, but let's keep it stupid people!


What do you call a cow that can't give milk?

Udderly useless.



What do you call a cow that can't give milk?

An udder failure.


What do you call it when a cow tries to jump over a barbwire fence?

Most likely? Udder destruction.



Please. . . Help me. . . it's an illness. . . :eek:
 
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