Critique? "Atonement," BDSM fiction. ~8600 words.

EDIT: Request is over. Thanks for all responses.

aniasrim said:

Link: http://anaisrimmed-prepub.blogspot.com.au/2014/03/atonement.html

EDIT: Moved from googledocs to a blogger URL for ease of layout. Same content.

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Yes, I caught the transposition error in my name. Also, yes, I will submit the work to Literotica once I am comfortable with the text.

I wasn't going to say anything about this, but others have looked at my stories while they might not have been interested either, so I'll take a bite at it.

I like bdsm, and lengthy stories, but upon cursory review, it looks like it has a segment about kids or an underage character. While I am no saint and have looked at illegal material before, I don't like to read about such subject matters, so I'll ask the question here before going any further.

It seems it wasn't age play, and might have been a historical account of the main character (or flashback). Even if there wasn't any sexual interactions with a child and even if that isn't against the rules for the site, I personally don't think minors should ever be mentioned in an erotic story. It's like posting pictures of your kids on a website where you are trying to get a date. It's really creepy to me.

Do you have children under 18 mentioned in the story? If yes, then I'm sorry, but I'll have to pass on reading it.

There's no explicit sex with minors depicted. But as you wish. Thank you for taking a look.

......

drinkz said:

Doesn't matter. If it can be read into it it'll never be accepted.

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By that standard, Mad Men would be censored. Rome. Hell, Judy Bloom. Laurel has said that implication off scene to set up plot is OK. Depictions are not. And, curiously, there isn't even implication of sex with a minor in this story.

But it's her site and if she chooses to reject, so be it.

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drinkz said:

I hope it works for you.

I've had a 10 part series published on other sites, but the first chapter was rejected here because it started with the couple meeting as teacher and student. When I pointed out that doesn't have to mean underage, I was told it didn't matter.

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Jon Franklin won a Pulitzer for a story about a man who started 1st grade when he was 24 years old. ZERO TOLERANCE at LIT.