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How To Get To Heaven When You Die

DO YOU ACCEPT JESUS GIFT OF SALVATION BELIEVING HE DIED N ROSE AGAIN FOR YOUR SINS?

  • YES

    Votes: 48 16.4%

  • NO

    Votes: 148 50.5%

  • I ALREADY ACCEPTED JESUS GIFT OF SALVATION BEFORE

    Votes: 62 21.2%

  • OTHER

    Votes: 35 11.9%
  • Total voters
    293
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Where's God_Above? I think I made a big mistake and wanted to confess.

It's really hard in those confession booths these days. So many glory holes and one woman thought I wuz a Priest.

Anyway, I tried to talk about this w/Jesus AND tell him about that whore on the corner (I read somewhere he's had experience with those things).

But, you know, Jesus really hurt my feelings when I said I had 2 tickets to a baseball game. Jesus don't like baseball? WTF kind of craziness is that? I would've bought him a beer if he really wanted 1. But what the hell - soda costs about the same.
 
Tryharder62 said:
Aww thank you.....You would have a lot to worship. Size 11 ladies. Woot Woot!:rose: I'll talk to you later about the wand.;)
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I hope you get this post cuz I'll be lying prostrate in my hair shirt until you deem me worthy of the adoration one of your great stature so richly deserves.

Size 11 ruby slippers and matching tiara being delivered as we speak.
Wand?! Wot?! Now we're talking my kind of Deity :D. I'm working on an altar right now. May I use canapes and vodka as the host?
 
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RocketLauncher said:
I hope you get this post cuz I'll be lying prostrate in my hair shirt until you deem me worthy of the adoration one of your great stature so richly deserves.

Size 11 ruby slippers and matching tiara being delivered as we speak.
Wand?! Wot?! Now we're talking my kind of Deity :D. I'm working on an altar right now. May I use canapes and vodka as the host?
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You have always been worthy. Make it pizza and diet Pepsi!

.;)
 
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Tryharder62 said:
You have always been worthy. Make it pizza and diet Pepsi!

.;)
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Ty! That hair shirt was driving me crazy :)

Pizza and Diet Pepsi it is. A fine choice might I add, but that shouldn't surprise me coming from an omniscient being and Almighty Creator worthy of my devotion. :):heart:
 
RocketLauncher said:
Sure, show me one passage where the name Jesus Christ is mentioned in the Old Testament.
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It doesn't have to mention His name directly, but it does call Him "Immanuel" in the Old Testament and in the New, meaning "God with us".

There are hundreds of prophecies in the OT of Him. The entire chapter of psalm 22 is a prayer of Jesus on the cross written hundreds of years before His birth. Isaiah chapter 53 describes Him perfectly. There are many many others.
 
The whole prophecy angle is bogus. If the OT prophecies were so explicit and clear, then everyone would know about them. Anyone being proclaimed as the Messiah would be faced with a mob looking to murder him as a sacrifice for the world's sins, and better sooner than later. The authors of the Gospels knew about the prophecies. If the disciples were sure Jesus was the Messiah and that he had to die, they would have taken care of that essential task long before they got to Jerusalem.
 
https://en.wikisource.org/wiki/Bible_(King_James_Version,_1611)/Psalmes#22

Chapter 1

1 The happineſſe of the godly. 4 The vnhappineſſe of the vngodly.


BLeſſed ** Prou. 4. 14. is the man that walketh not in the counſell of the ǁǁ Or, wicked. vngodly, nor ſtandeth in the way of ſinners, nor ſitteth in the ſeat of the ſcornefull.

2 But his delight is in the Law of the Lord, ** Ioſh. 1. 8. pſal. 119. 1. iere. 17. 8. and in his Law doeth he meditate day and night.

3 And he ſhalbe like a tree planted by the riuers of water, that bringeth foorth his fruit in his ſeaſon, his leafe alſo ſhall not †† Hebr. fade. wither, and whatſoeuer he doeth, ſhall proſper.

4 The vngodly are not ſo: but are ** Pſal. 34. 5. iſa. 17. 13. like the chaffe, which the winde driueth away.

5 Therefore the vngodly ſhall not ſtand in the iudgement, nor ſinners in the Congregation of the righteous.

6 For the Lord knoweth the way of the righteous: but the way of the vngodly ſhall periſh.
 
Antryg_Windrose said:
Is heaven filled with the mute souls of trillions of miscarried embryos? Just wondering.
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In Japan, yes. Their afterlife is filled with the souls of aborted and miscarried babies.

According to Buddhist belief, a baby who is never born can’t go to heaven, having never had the opportunity to accumulate good karma. But Jizo, a sort of patron saint of fetal demise, can smuggle these half-baked souls to paradise in his pockets. He also delivers the toys and snacks we saw being left at his feet on Mount Koya. Jizo is the U.P.S. guy of the afterlife.

https://mobile.nytimes.com/1996/01/25/world/in-japan-a-ritual-of-mourning-for-abortions.html
 
phrodeau said:
The whole prophecy angle is bogus. If the OT prophecies were so explicit and clear, then everyone would know about them. Anyone being proclaimed as the Messiah would be faced with a mob looking to murder him as a sacrifice for the world's sins, and better sooner than later. The authors of the Gospels knew about the prophecies. If the disciples were sure Jesus was the Messiah and that he had to die, they would have taken care of that essential task long before they got to Jerusalem.
Click to expand...

Or maybe......things happened just the way they should have.:cool:
 
RocketLauncher said:
In Japan, yes. Their afterlife is filled with the souls of aborted and miscarried babies.

According to Buddhist belief, a baby who is never born can’t go to heaven, having never had the opportunity to accumulate good karma. But Jizo, a sort of patron saint of fetal demise, can smuggle these half-baked souls to paradise in his pockets. He also delivers the toys and snacks we saw being left at his feet on Mount Koya. Jizo is the U.P.S. guy of the afterlife.

https://mobile.nytimes.com/1996/01/25/world/in-japan-a-ritual-of-mourning-for-abortions.html
Click to expand...

Sad that Jizo is pagan, i.e. Satanic.

What becomes of the little children who die unbaptized? The Bible is silent. The pitch is often repeated: to get into Heaven, one must be saved. Hell awaits the unsaved.

What a horrible religion is Christianity, at least that pitched by most evangelicals.
 
RocketLauncher said:
Christian with a tiara? :cool::rose:
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New Avatar for you. LOL

phrodeau said:
Where was the expectant crowd awaiting Jesus to escape from the tomb? Why were there no witnesses to that miracle? Didn't they know it would happen?
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Personally, I think most saw it as the end when Jesus died. To see him like that you cannot doubt he was dead....DEAD! I don't think they understood his words about raising the temple on the third day. Couldn't comprehend how he could come back to life after being crucified like that. Even Thomas had to be shown the nail prints and the pierced side. Doubts can be powerful. I don't know why God chooses to do things the way he does them sometimes.
 
phrodeau said:
Where was the expectant crowd awaiting Jesus to escape from the tomb? Why were there no witnesses to that miracle? Didn't they know it would happen?
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The volume of what you don't know, but yet pontificate on is staggering. He was specifically laid to rest in a borrowed tomb to avoid the possibility of crowds and the Romans were concerned that someone would steal the body and claim he was risen. Which perhaps is what happened.
 
Que said:
The volume of what you don't know, but yet pontificate on is staggering. He was specifically laid to rest in a borrowed tomb to avoid the possibility of crowds and the Romans were concerned that someone would steal the body and claim he was risen. Which perhaps is what happened.
Click to expand...
They knew where the tomb was. Mary and her friend were there when Jesus was delivered to it.
Matthew 27:57 As evening approached, there came a rich man from Arimathea, named Joseph, who had himself become a disciple of Jesus. 58 Going to Pilate, he asked for Jesus’ body, and Pilate ordered that it be given to him. 59 Joseph took the body, wrapped it in a clean linen cloth, 60 and placed it in his own new tomb that he had cut out of the rock. He rolled a big stone in front of the entrance to the tomb and went away. 61 Mary Magdalene and the other Mary were sitting there opposite the tomb.

Matthew 27:62 The next day, the one after Preparation Day, the chief priests and the Pharisees went to Pilate. 63 “Sir,” they said, “we remember that while he was still alive that deceiver said, ‘After three days I will rise again.’ 64 So give the order for the tomb to be made secure until the third day. Otherwise, his disciples may come and steal the body and tell the people that he has been raised from the dead. This last deception will be worse than the first.”

Matthew 27:65 “Take a guard,” Pilate answered. “Go, make the tomb as secure as you know how.” 66 So they went and made the tomb secure by putting a seal on the stone and posting the guard.

Matthew 28:1 After the Sabbath, at dawn on the first day of the week, Mary Magdalene and the other Mary went to look at the tomb.

Matthew 28:2 There was a violent earthquake, for an angel of the Lord came down from heaven and, going to the tomb, rolled back the stone and sat on it. 3 His appearance was like lightning, and his clothes were white as snow. 4 The guards were so afraid of him that they shook and became like dead men.
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Did the guards witness the miracle? Jesus would have had to walk past them. Maybe he had Jedi powers?
 
phrodeau said:
They knew where the tomb was. Mary and her friend were there when Jesus was delivered to it.
Did the guards witness the miracle? Jesus would have had to walk past them. Maybe he had Jedi powers?
Click to expand...

Buddy_Christ_2.png
 
So an immortal god was killed and revived to rescue humans from punishment imposed by the immortal god on humans for being born. That's how it works?
 
Antryg_Windrose said:
So an immortal god was killed and revived to rescue humans from punishment imposed by the immortal god on humans for being born. That's how it works?
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Well..........no.:eek: A loving God gave his creations the choice to believe in Him or not. We didn't choose well. He came to live with us and experience life the way we do. The joys as well as the sorrows. Believe me, on the cross, He understood the depths of our physical, emotional and spiritual pain. He did it so we wouldn"t have to suffer for the wrong choices we made. Yet he doesn't force us to believe. Instead he again gives us a choice and invites us to let Him help us. I accepted the invitation.:D
 
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Antryg_Windrose said:
So an immortal god was killed and revived to rescue humans from punishment imposed by the immortal god on humans for being born. That's how it works?
Click to expand...
You're confusing him w/Jesus.


Tryharder62 said:
Well..........no.:eek: A loving God gave his creations the choice to believe in Him or not. We didn't choose well. . He came to live with us and experience life the way we do. The joys as well as the sorrows. Believe me, on the cross, He understood the depths of our physical, emotional and spiritual pain. He did it so we wouldn"t have to suffer for the wrong choices we made. Yet he doesn't force us to believe. Instead he again gives us a choice, but invites us to let Him help us again and again. I accepted the invitation.:D
Click to expand...
We're really God's favorite little pets. He loves us and gave us the choice as he thought of letting us go. If we come back or choose to stay, then we really love him. He's not going to stand in our way.
 
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