Dear X:

Dear T,

Hey, I'm not a mind reader. Maybe if you actually TOLD me things, I wouldn't have to guess... how can I be "getting it" when I don't know what "it" is?

I get it. You just want me to wait around for you to do whatever you're going to do - which works out fine when I'm not dependent on you for transportation. Believe me, you won't be more relieved than I am when my car gets fixed.

Me

Dear Company Owner and CEO AKA Bossman,

Clearly, you're either a lazy bastard or just plain stupid. I could attribute that to the fact that you're Canadian, but that would be insulting other Canadians that I KNOW are not stupid or lazy because they're Canadians. Therefore I will attribute these things to your tainted bloodline.

When dealing with Mexican construction workers of questionable legal resident status (MCWQLRS), it isn't just enough that you set down a set of rules designed to keep the productivity of your company high. It is important that you ensure that these rules are enforced by your company executives, your shop foreman, your line supervisors, and your lead men. If you want people to stop taking an extra TWENTY minutes for their fifteen minute break then you must have someone actually tell them to go back to work and, if they still do not listen, write them up and fire them as necessary.

I have nothing personal against the MCWQLRSes but I have worked with them long enough to know that if you allow them to take advantage of something they will do so, shamelessly and without reservation and they will even go beyond the liberties that you have given them until you say ENOUGH. They are much like children in that regard.

Also, cutting back on overtime to IMPROVE productivity...yeah that doesn't seem to be working.

Maybe if you actually assigned some people to oversee the work instead of just giving the monkeys (no racial slur intended) the typewriters and hoping they'll write Shakespeare by your deadline, you would see more profit from your company.

Sincerely,
One of the few people who can see the fucking forest for the trees

P.S. Maybe you should also try enforcing some real safety rules instead of waiting until your insurance company is coming to do an inspection to make people wear their proper protective equipment. Asshole.

Dear Dive Guru's,

You asked me to join you on your dives tomorrow and became upset when I politely refused. I explained my reasons and you became verbally abusive. You just didn't quite get it did you?

Yes you are a couple of young bucks. Big strapping guys in great shape from your hours at the gym. Your gear is top of the line. (As you pointed out to me while laughing at my gear, calling mine quant and antique.)

Yet you don't understand something. I have been diving or a couple of years and there are some things that send up warning flags for me. One is a couple of young guys with too much Testosterone loading brand new gear on a boat. Another is these same guys loading cases of beer on the same boat with their gear. Yet another is tha boat not having anything that even looks like a ladder or platform to assist with climbing aboard from the water.

Then I saw the Spear Guns and overheard you talking about the fish you would bag.

Hey guys I hate to tell you a Cigarette Boat is not the best dive platform.

I have noted the name of the boat and it's registration. I mentioned it to the Coasties so they can keep an eye on you when you go out tomorrow.

I hope you have a great dive, but somehow I don't think you will.

Cat

Dear Caro,

Please tell me? pweeeeeasssse? pweeeeeeasssseeee?!!!!

N

Fallenfromgrace said:

Dear Caro,

Please tell me? pweeeeeasssse? pweeeeeeasssseeee?!!!!

N

Click to expand...

Dear N,
You get points for cuteness.

If you would've agreed to items in earlier discussion today, you might've gotten somewhere, but since you said no you'll just have to keep waiting.

C

CarolinaHeat said:

Dear N,
You get points for cuteness.

If you would've agreed to items in earlier discussion today, you might've gotten somewhere, but since you said no you'll just have to keep waiting.

C

Click to expand...

Dear C,

Im confused, what did i not agree to? :s?!

Fallenfromgrace said:

Dear C,

Im confused, what did i not agree to? :s?!

Click to expand...

Dear C,

Don't answer this, she's fishing.

L.

Dear Cloudy,

Last night I was thinking of Nettles for you.
But you're so much more than prickly...



---

Dear Chantily,

We share a common sugar-bond (although you probably don't want to be called "Ho-Ho").
So the nickname shall be done.
Don't be shy, talk! I've gotta get the lay of the land, if you know what I mean...
And I swear that wasn't meant to be dirty!
(Okay, not entirely dirty. )

-Bluebell

Dear Comcast,

The best way to make a good first impression when you come into a new town is by NOT wiping out everyone's connection on a city-wide scale.

On a related note, congratulations you win the DUMBASS award!

Lee

Dear X

An eternal ray of sunshine has burned through the controlling bastard that buried it and is again shining brightly.

Dear Misty,

You are amazing. I love you, and i love them, and i'm just, wow. Thank you so much sweetheart, for such a thoughtful, beautiful gift. Its not just that they are my favourite flowers, its that you took some time and effort to seek them out and have them sent and all the thought about wanting me to be able to enjoy them before i go away and...*happy sigh* they are just stunning, and i love you so much for the thought.

<3 Me

ps. and for the very reason that they are so stunning, i can forgive the refusal to tell me anything about my 'surprise'

bump.
Dear everybody,
I need to keep this thread handy. It's been very therapeutic. Thank you for not letting it die just yet.

bijou

Dear Trolls

Do your worst.... you're not gonna win! Oh, wait, you're already doing your worst to get my scores down....well, go fuck yourselves! I'm gonna keep writing, if nothing else but to spite you with plenty of hot smut!

dear jessi

thank you for carolina's avatar

feee

feeeriek said:

dear jessi

thank you for carolina's avatar

feee

Click to expand...

beautiful isnt it?

Dear you,
Don't ever scold me in front of your friends again. My personal life is none of their business.
Me.

Dear Cats;

Couldn't you have let me sleep in just a little longer this morning? We all know you're just going to lick the juice off the top of the cat food and leave the rest anyway. What was the big hurry?

Sincerely,

The good little witch
(The one who opens those little cans)

Dear Self,

Seriously, when you see that can labeled "worms", leave it alone. Just because someone asks you a question, it doesn't mean they want an honest answer. Nice is good enough; there's no need for all-out passion and excitement. He loves you, even if his mistakes and his pride have delayed being together. Eventually, he'll grow up and be ready, and stop putting obstacles in his own path. Do you really think you're too good to wait another year or two or three?

Sincerely,
Cerise

Dear Lover,

You left your wrist watch on my bedside table this morning before going to work. I am wearing it right now and counting the seconds until you call. How many times can a woman be kissed by you and still feel the same thrill, like it's the first time all over again, like falling into the vast, blue, borderless sea of dreams you create with me and in me and for me always?

Your Lover

Dear Red Cross Blood Lady;

Thank you for not hurting me with your needle and thank you for letting me pick the tape color.

Sincerely,
The Good little witch
(the one who fell over the table because she was graceless, not because she felt lightheaded)

CeriseNoire said:

Dear Self,

Seriously, when you see that can labeled "worms", leave it alone. Just because someone asks you a question, it doesn't mean they want an honest answer. Nice is good enough; there's no need for all-out passion and excitement. He loves you, even if his mistakes and his pride have delayed being together. Eventually, he'll grow up and be ready, and stop putting obstacles in his own path. Do you really think you're too good to wait another year or two or three?

Sincerely,
Cerise

Click to expand...

Dear Cerise,

I'm afraid that the Robin you ordered got delayed due to a staff shortage in our packaging department. We have now fulfilled your order, however, and your purchase should arrive with you shortly. As a token of our apology for the delay please accept this handy purse-sized crowbar for the removal of wayward feet from mouth.

Yours Sincerely,
The Cleanup Company

glynndah said:

Dear Cats;

Couldn't you have let me sleep in just a little longer this morning? We all know you're just going to lick the juice off the top of the cat food and leave the rest anyway. What was the big hurry?

Sincerely,

The good little witch
(The one who opens those little cans)

Click to expand...

Wow, thought it was just my cat that did that.

Dear teacher,

WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!?!?!

C

Dear X

If we managed to be on the same schedule and in the same room a bit more often, I bet our sex life would be way better. See what you can do about those ridiculous 12 hour days, hm?

bijou

Dear God,

Is it too much to ask for the power to crush the throats of the insolent with the Force, like Darth Vader?

Lee