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Subs and a firm voice

subalice said:
Slightly off topic but for me tha name thing works wonders even online
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I found it works with my sub through text lol. I just type her sub name in all caps and she gets back in line. She says that as she reads it she can hear my voice and it makes her shiver and get wet immediately.
 
allforfun86 said:
I found it works with my sub through text lol. I just type her sub name in all caps and she gets back in line. She says that as she reads it she can hear my voice and it makes her shiver and get wet immediately.
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That makes sense. Sometimes you just need a little reminder...
 
subscribed.. :devil:


Verbal Domination is something I struggled with a lot at first.. In my head I was afraid of crossing some imaginary line that would make her see me differently. I didn't want her to resent or worse, fear me ... As it turns out she loves it as much as I do.

I am not into humiliation, maybe it would be different if I was with someone who would enjoy it. My wife would cry and I think it would be something she would have a hard time recovering from.
 
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His calm voice, perfectly in control, giving even a simple command... Yeah, that's the good stuff.
 
For me the firm voice, paired with a calm presence , is a huge turn on, that instantly reminds my mind and whole body to be alert and pay attention. It's a necessary tool, because I am a notorious overthinker and it is an effictive way to help me focus on what's important. - that is when it's an actual play situation.
On the phone or in text it scares me and emphasize all my doubts and fears, because I can't see any body language and I am, by nature, terrified of upsetting somebody.
 
yossi said:
But, really, it's not an easy thing to be humiliated when you are not into the kink. And if you aren't sure, it can build a lot of resentment. Please, please keep that line of communication open with your partner and let him know your reservations.
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Thanks for your advice, don't worry though, we do communicate a lot!
Is there a way of finding out whether I'm in it or not, except from trying? How did you find out?

allforfun86 said:
This is important for humiliation and degradation. My sub loves when I talk down to her, but only in certain ways. If I say 'look at that fat slurty ass bounce!' she groans smiles and rides me harder. But I know if I put a hand on her stomach and said I love your fat jiggly body, she's probably brake down and cry that second.

You have to clarify if you are or aren't into it at all. If you are into it, what are no go areas, meaning what can he say and can't. If you're not into them at all then he's shit outta luck and needs to accept that. Although this is just my own opinion obviously.
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Thanks for sharing and for giving your opinion! Well, I don't know, I guess you can accept being humiliated only about things that aren't a source of complex... But maybe it's not that simple...
Fortunately, he's ok with a vanilla sexuality. :D

Tinkerskitten said:
This is something you need to discuss beforehand what is okay and what isn't. My Master and I have been exploring humiliation because I enjoy it in certain ways. Personally, for me, I have body image issues so he would never use that during play.
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I have the same problem. What kind of humiliation do you accept from him, then, if I may ask?
 
Nidalee said:
I have the same problem. What kind of humiliation do you accept from him, then, if I may ask?
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I know you aren't asking me, but I'm just trying to help lol. For my sub she enjoys her humiliation to be more mental then physical. Calling her dirty names, slut and cock whore for instance, really get her off. Sometimes I'll play out a fantasy of men lining up with their dicks out ready to fuck her and with her face hidden because no one cares what she looks like. That really gets her off. For my sub, it's the humiliation of submitting to her desires that she feels are wrong and unaccaeptable socially and of being used as nothing but a hole, like she as a person doesn't matter. It embarrasses her to want it so badly, but it also arouses her. So me talking about it in a almost teasing/accusing way makes her damn near squirt. I hope this came out clearly. I'm at work and writing it as I can so it's a little broken lol.
 
Thanks for sharing! And sorry I somehow hijacked your original thread...
So you humiliating her is a way of telling her that her desires are only human and nothing unacceptable, right?
 
Nidalee said:
Thanks for sharing! And sorry I somehow hijacked your original thread...
So you humiliating her is a way of telling her that her desires are only human and nothing unacceptable, right?
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Yes and no. I am telling her that, but it's the feeling of guilt shame and embarrassment that get her off. If she grows to accept those feelings then it won't humiliate her anymore and she won't get off on it. I want her to know that I accept her for it, but others may not, kind of. The negative feelings are what's getting her off and making it fun. So if the feelings aren't negative then she won't enjoy it. You just have to be careful how strong those negative feelings are. Some may be to strong and emotionally hurt them. Others will only encourage and arouse them. It's a fine line lol
 
Nidalee said:
Thanks for your advice, don't worry though, we do communicate a lot!
Is there a way of finding out whether I'm in it or not, except from trying? How did you find out?
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Aside from trying, it's something I fantasize about, and makes me wet. For me it's also therapeutic: I engage in a lot of negative self talk in my mind. having someone else give a voice to those thoughts, hearing them, and being able to cry and be held and comforted afterward allows me to finally face them. I realize I'm way too hard on myself and that the bad things I say to myself aren't true at all.

I don't know if this is why others use/like humiliation and degradation, but that's a big part of it for me personally.
 
La damnee elle la licorne said:
:heart:

I didn't ask the question but I am glad to hear an answer that lets m have some empathy, thank you yossi.


This is not dissimilar though not same route of mind to why I reject compliments and why I persue picture posting as part of my literotica experience.

Thanks
You dear soul for sharing ❤️
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Yes, it's not a kink many people get, because it does sound horrific, doesn't it? I'm glad sharing helped.
 
yossi said:
Aside from trying, it's something I fantasize about, and makes me wet. For me it's also therapeutic: I engage in a lot of negative self talk in my mind. having someone else give a voice to those thoughts, hearing them, and being able to cry and be held and comforted afterward allows me to finally face them. I realize I'm way too hard on myself and that the bad things I say to myself aren't true at all.

I don't know if this is why others use/like humiliation and degradation, but that's a big part of it for me personally.
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Humiliation is something I've never really understood. Your personal take on this is insightful. Well stated.
 
allforfun86 said:
Yes and no. I am telling her that, but it's the feeling of guilt shame and embarrassment that get her off. If she grows to accept those feelings then it won't humiliate her anymore and she won't get off on it. I want her to know that I accept her for it, but others may not, kind of. The negative feelings are what's getting her off and making it fun. So if the feelings aren't negative then she won't enjoy it. You just have to be careful how strong those negative feelings are. Some may be to strong and emotionally hurt them. Others will only encourage and arouse them. It's a fine line lol
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:heart: yes it is, but with someone you trust who knows you so well and you communicate with openly, it can be magic :cattail:
You describe very well what Master does with me sometimes and I love it.

Back to the voice... yes, quiet, firm and calm. And if I have been naughty, a disapproving note :cattail:
 
Taunting voice and mocking low laughter is also pretty fucking tasty.
 
My Master's voice, with that tone, used to make me pay attention, nipples harden, and pussy wet. He doesn't use it much on me anymore, and I miss it dearly.
 
My Dom is a Daddy Dom, so I call that his "Daddy voice". Its a different tone than the one he uses in every day conversations.
Its a tone that is authoritative, and commands my attention. It really is almost a command, especially when its used for short phrases, like when he says "come here"

It definitely makes me listen, and it is a turn on to hear the authority. Its a little reminder that he's always in charge.
 
I saw these and it made me think of this thread.

tumblr_nnhpuaKMyA1uo70qeo1_500.gif


tumblr_nnhpuaKMyA1uo70qeo2_500.gif


:D
 
Aural Porn

Ahhh... that voice is the equivalent of aural porn. Especially, when it is accompanied with a sharp look. Game over. I may be a puddle, but my spine straightens right up and all I can think about is making certain he is satisfied with my response. Even if it means I'm in trouble.

*Runs off to listen to Benedict Cumberbatch speak*
 
allforfun86 said:
So the other day me and my sub wife were having a session and asked her a question. I can't remember what the actual question was, something about a fantasy of hers, and she but her lip nervously and looked down while debating her answer. When she looked back up at me I already knew she was going to lie, so before she could say a word I simply said "Tell me." In a firm voice. My wife shut her eyes, shivered and then immediately answered the question truthfully.

This intrigued me a lot and I tried experimenting with it. I found that if I use that tone with simple short sentences, that she would have a much faster reaction then if I used my normal tone and that she was far more aroused. We are relatively knew to sub lifestyle so having to use that tone hasn't come up until now.

So I was curious if any other subs out there react the same way my wife has to their doms firm and sharp voice. Does it make you quiver or anything like that?
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IMHO voice is key. if I have done anything wrong I try to avoid Skype with Master. Just hearing his voice and 'that look' breaks me , makes me swoon like a teenager
 
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