Very new to forums... got a question...

You talk to him. Maybe not use loaded scary words like dominant [top] and submissive [bottom], but figure out what you'd like to try, and talk.

Do you see submission as him taking a little more control in bed? If so, what does that look like (in your mind)?

Do you see submission as things outside of bed? What (in your mind) does that look like?

Did you read a book, or story, or see something in porn that made you curious about D/s? If so, that could be a good conversation starter "I was reading this story about ___... want to curl up in bed and read it together?" Ask what he thinks about it.

You have to put on your big girl panties and talk. And you also have to be ready to hear that he might be kinky, but not the way you are. Or might see D/s differently than you do. Or might not want to be the dominant/top in the relationship.
 
Hmmm so much to think about thank you so much for your advice... is fifty shades a horrible reference lol jk!
 
Unless you want to be treated like shit and given diamond bracelets for your trouble... yes. ;)

On second thought though, no.

It's an opener. In the "everyone I know is talking about that 50 Shades book, so I have to admit I got curious and read it... it was kinda lame in ___ and ___ way, but some things really turned me on..." way.

But (IMO) for that to work, you gotta know what your personal idea of submission (or bottoming) is. For example, I once had a guy tell me I was a fake submissive, because I wasn't impressed with his toy collection. I laughed at him, because he didn't even ask if I knew how to make a decent cup of French press coffee. Neither of us were wrong, we just had different ideas of what we wanted out of things.
 
I think a lot of -- women, especially -- think they want to become submissive full time, but most of us? Not so much in practice. Real submission will involve a real person instead of a Christian Grey Mind Reading Adorable And wealthy Manchild™.

Read the essay in my sig, see if it rings any bells one way or the other. :) There's a short list of books at the end of it as well.

And welcome!
 
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