Coming vs Cumming

Hello,

I've been given contradictory "corrections" by editors on when to use come/cum and when to use coming/cumming. I suppose at the end of the day it's up to the author but I wondered what the consensus was.

Someone whose judgement I trust dearly spelled it out or me as "coming" if its the verb, cum when it's the substance. This makes sense to me so I've been going by it.

-Leslie

I always use 'cum' to describe both the act of orgasm and the semen. I use 'come' only in the regular non-orgasmic sense.

As long as the cum is consistent, with no messy blobs or inclusions...

My non-canonical usage rules follow a pattern:

* He felt her cum.
* He spewed cum.
* She was cumming.
* She came hard.
* "Cum with me," she whispered. (sexual)
* "Come with me," she ordered. (non-sexual)

So, 'cum' is sexual: the substance and the process, except past tense. 'Come' is non-sexual, but liable to punning, as in "I'm coming, mother" vs "I'm cumming, mother".

Using the dictionary and sticking to proper diction, "come" is correct and "cum" is a low brow way of describing orgasm.

That said, I have read many stories over the years, most printed, and I can firmly say that when I read a character say "I'm coming" or "come with me," I have always figured that they were walking out the door.

Low brow or not, "cum" is a less confused word to spell out exactly what is happening and the reader doesn't need to read on two or three more sentences before they realized that someone orgasmed.

Prevailing custom is still to use "coming" as the verb. "Cumming" is gaining ground in acceptance, but you don't see it nearly as much as "coming." There is no "rule," however. Whichever you choose, you should be consistent across the story. I imagine "cumming" will eventually prevail for this usage, as it distinguishes the specific use.

As a noun, "cum" isn't legitimately a word yet either in U.S. publishing, at least, but more people use it for this meaning than don't.

When I was looking at publishers some time ago, they had the rule that "come" was the verb and "cum" was the noun.

I'd think as long as you're consistent in a story, especially on a site like this, it probably doesn't matter. I know personally when I see "cumming," it strikes me as something a kid would write, but that's just me.

Well, Leslie, here's what I do. If I use the word come, coming, came, anywhere else in the story to mean arriving, etc, then I only use cum, cummed, cumming, etc to mean orgasm. Otherwise one may use either, as long as one maintains the same usage throughout. Personally I prefer cum for orgasm, because then here can be no confusion about what is meant. If you wish, you may use the French j'arrive, lol.

From the etymology dictionary;

cum
verb and noun, by 1973, apparently a variant of the sexual sense of come that originated in pornographic writing, perhaps first in the noun sense.

This "experience sexual orgasm" slang meaning of come (perhaps originally come off) is attested from 1650, in "Walking In A Meadowe Greene," in a folio of "loose songs" collected by Bishop Percy.

“They lay soe close together, they made me much to wonder;
I knew not which was wether, until I saw her under.
Then off he came, and blusht for shame soe soon that he had endit;
Yet still she lies, and to him cryes, "one more and none can mend it."

As a noun meaning "semen or other product of orgasm" it is on record from the 1920s. The sexual cum seems to have no connection with Latin cum, the preposition meaning "with, together with," which is occasionally used in English in local names of combined parishes or benifices (such as Chorlton-cum-Hardy), in popular Latin phrases (such as cum laude), or as a combining word to indicate a dual nature or function (such as slumber party-cum-bloodbath).

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I prefer 'come' as you don't have to change verb for the past tense. 'Cummed' anybody?

elfin_odalisque said:

I prefer 'come' as you don't have to change verb for the past tense. 'Cummed' anybody?

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For past tense without punning, pull out the thesaurus and find a synonym. Climaxed, spewed, erupted, convulsed... wait, let me check my sex-slang thesaurus:
______________________________________________

Orgasm (to Achieve)
see Ejaculate

The predominance of male-derived terms in this list seems to suggest that the female orgasm is a modern invention.

bring off, cheer, cheese, climax, come, come off, come one's cocoa, come one's fat, convulse, cream, cream one's jeans, cream one's silkies, deposit, die, discharge, dry, ejaculate, emission, fade, fall in the furrow, fanny bomb, lire, get off, get one's balls off, get one's gun off, get one's nuts off, get one's rocks off, go over the mountain, have a double shot, have a nocturnal, have a small stroke, have a wet dream, have one's ticket punched, hit the top, jet one's juice, light off, little death, melt, number three, peak, pleasure, pop, pop one's cookie, pop one's cork, pop one's nuts, say YES!, see stars, shake and shiver, shoot off one's load, shoot one's load, shoot one's roe, shoot one's wad, spend, spew, spit, squirt, stand up and shout, stand upward, take one's pleasure, thrill, throw up

To come was used in Shakespeare's time to refer to achieving orgasm but remains a popular current euphemism today.

Fanny bomb: a female orgasm.

Religious invocations are common phrases uttered by men and women as they climax: "Oh my God," "Oh God," "Oh Jesus."

I always use cum for sexual and come for non sexual. Makes it easier for me and I think the readers here. I'm pretty consistent with it. Of course I'm a low brow writer! LOL

The vagaries of English sexual slang

elfin_odalisque said:

From the etymology dictionary;



I prefer 'come' as you don't have to change verb for the past tense. 'Cummed' anybody?

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"He was about to come. Soon he came. As he was coming, he spurted out his come." Looks strange.

"He was about to cum. Soon he {cummed}. As he was cumming, he spurted out his cum." Looks really strange.

"He was about to come. Soon he came. As he was coming he spurted out his cum." Still looks odd, but probably the best using "come/cum"?

"His was about to get off. Soon he got off. As he was getting it off, he spurted out his jizz." Really works better for me.

"He was close to orgasm. Soon he had an orgasm. As he had his orgasm, he spurted out his semen." Medical report?

It is really strange that we do not have a good vocabulary for this. We have a lot more euphemisms for penis and vagina than we do for orgasm.

My thought on come vs cum is that the first is for non-sexual events, and the second is for the act of orgasm and the fluid produced. As for tenses, I use cum, came, have cum, cumming for the sexual aspects.

To me it's context. If I'm reading a sex scene and "she came," I do not suddenly think someone entered the room. So I don't particularly see the need to differentiate so much. But again, as long as it's consistent within a story, I don't see a problem.

I've reached a point where I rarely use the verb. It's started sounding weird to me when I read it back for some reason.

Every so often one will sneak in there, but it tends to be "release", "climax", "orgasm", etc.

That's narrative, though. It comes up in dialogue all the time.

I do not know about you, but women I make love to do ejaculate, so perhaps the "ejaculate" reference was unintentionally non-sexist.