Seven Letter Post Office X 3 Redux

Tio_Narratore said:

Though the affair provided for endless hours of conversation in seedy cocktail lounges throughout the country.

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HBergeron said:

She had so many affairs that the ratio of those engaged to those ultimately married plunged severely.

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Handley_Page said:

I think that may have a bearing on who the 'plunger' was ?

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HBergeron said:

As well as the concept of gerunds, as in, did she mind them plunging? I tend to think not...

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Tio_Narratore said:

for she faced far more than grammatical dangers: the Inquisition was on her trail, and the Spaniards hoped to surprise her in flagrante delicto.

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Handley_Page said:

It was defined later as "Strange".
The Inq. had to file it under "Un-solved".

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Tio_Narratore said:

She was highly angered when she heard they had listed her potential sex crime as "unsolved." She resolved to seduce the Chief Inquisitor himself to show him what her body could do to men.

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HBergeron said:

But upon discovering that the Chief Inquisitor preferred lovers with a bit more penis than she could provide, she offered her best regards and was on her way.

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Tio_Narratore said:

On her way to enjoy every perverted pleasure to be found in the gardens of earthly delights

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Handley_Page said:

which were supervised by very competent wardens

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HBergeron said:

... Who soon found themselves drained by her behind the bougainvilleas.

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Tio_Narratore said:

And pity the poor vice cops who trailed her and fell into pathetic lives of voyeurism after watching her antics.

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HBergeron said:

Soon, the local police faced disgrace, branded as 'Peeping Toms', with all the derision that nickname entails.

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Tio_Narratore said:

Yet, so strong was their perversion that in the silence of night they still sought glimpses of naked folks at play.

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HBergeron said:

It's sort of a 'cop thing' to keep on with their errant behavior regardless of the public reaction it elicits.

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Tio_Narratore said:

And their errant behaviour allowed her the freedom to solicit partners for her perverted practices.

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HBergeron said:

She was always well known for her deep desire to receive slaps and tickles from any available man.

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Tio_Narratore said:

And her propensity to adore any man or woman who suckles at her milky breasts.

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Handley_Page said:

But she get nervous when he buckles after the Vodka.

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HBergeron said:

Staring down at him passed out on the floor with his pants around his ankles, she couldn't help but chuckle.

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Tio_Narratore said:

The church ladies, however, found no humor in the situation, and simply clucked their disapproval of both the loose woman and the drunken man at her feet.

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Handley_Page said:

One could easily tell by the way their knitting needles clicked at a furious rate.

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HBergeron said:

Laughing at the old biddies, she simply slinked away towards a nearby tavern looking for her next fresh meat.

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Handley_Page said:

Her ancient bicycle clanked as she rode away.

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HBergeron said:

As she peddled away, singing 'Glitter and be Gay' from Candide, townspeople smirked at her pretense of virtue.

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