As The Hospital Pervs

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Amputate. Really are you going to miss that much? Sounds like the thing has been nothing but trouble anyway.:D

Yeah, it really is a total fucking pain in my ass. I should just get a hack saw and off it. The martini will help squash the pain. Great advice. :p
 
I don't think you actually need all your toes. You'd probably be just fine without it.
 
Soak it in Ice water till numb then knock it off with one fast slice. You'll only walk funny for a couple days and there will be more room in your shoes.
 
I don't think you actually need all your toes. You'd probably be just fine without it.

Oh, and you know, I have a problem with my feet. My second toe is nearly as long as my big toe. I hate that about my feet. My second toe is the one that I stubbed. I really should just cut it off. My foot would be more attractive.

Soak it in Ice water till numb then knock it off with one fast slice. You'll only walk funny for a couple days and there will be more room in your shoes.


Excellent. What do you recommend for possible infection?
 
Oh, and you know, I have a problem with my feet. My second toe is nearly as long as my big toe. I hate that about my feet. My second toe is the one that I stubbed. I really should just cut it off. My foot would be more attractive.
Excellent. What do you recommend for possible infection?
Ahahahaha Don't do it! I hope it is all better now.
 
I don't want to go to SCHOOL to get pharmacy goodies! Sheesh.
Seduce a pharmer then? There are some hot pharm boys out there. My favorite pharmacist has a name that is a palindrome.
I said: Your name is a palindrome.
He said: I know.

Then he started saying full sentences that were palindromes. I was totally fucking hooked. I am pretty easy like that.
 
Ahahahaha Don't do it! I hope it is all better now.

I opted to keep the toe. It still pisses me off that the second toe nearly is as long as my big toe. There is something very unfair about that. My toes are inferior.

It started bleeding and releasing a little puss today, but it no longer throbs or hurts. I think I may be entering infection land. Besides a little antibiotic ointment, any other medical care?

I hope it doesn't fall off. DOH!
 
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I opted to keep the toe. It still pisses me off that the second toe nearly is as long as my big toe. There is something very unfair about that. My toes are inferior.

It started bleeding and releasing a little puss today, but it no longer throbs or hurts. I think I may be entering infection land. Besides a little antibiotic ointment, any other medical care?

I hope it doesn't fall off. DOH!
Now I am looking at my toes. I am sure your toes are normal. It won't fall off! Just watch it and if it doesn't get better, I suppose you will have to see the doctor! The surgeon! :eek: just kidding.
 
Now I am looking at my toes. I am sure your toes are normal. It won't fall off! Just watch it and if it doesn't get better, I suppose you will have to see the doctor! The surgeon! :eek: just kidding.

Heh. You're so reassuring!
 
I can't wait to use my pretty new sheet tomorrow at work.
If only my scrubs would iron themselves, that would be great.
 
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Seduce a pharmer then? There are some hot pharm boys out there. My favorite pharmacist has a name that is a palindrome.
I said: Your name is a palindrome.
He said: I know.

Then he started saying full sentences that were palindromes. I was totally fucking hooked. I am pretty easy like that.

Wouldn't that kinda make me a crack ho then?

A pharm ho. Nice!
 
I opted to keep the toe. It still pisses me off that the second toe nearly is as long as my big toe. There is something very unfair about that. My toes are inferior.

It started bleeding and releasing a little puss today, but it no longer throbs or hurts. I think I may be entering infection land. Besides a little antibiotic ointment, any other medical care?

I hope it doesn't fall off. DOH!

Soak it in hot water and Epsom salts. Don't burn yourself but it works better if it's really warm. Keep it clean. Antibiotic ointment helps but keeping it clean and dry does just as well.
 
There is a tablespoon of gas in my car.
The Paramedics are out fast and loud.

And I'm ready to blast my body with adrenalin and coffee.
It's a burning box of tissues.
 
Sometimes it's just like butter on rice.

And I don't know where three hours go.
I might be able to accept love sometime soon.
 
It's time to give out rat poison- I mean warfarin.
It's also time to start wetting for the night nurse honey.

I get butterflies in my belly cause it feels real good to be relieved. When I know it's coming I get all silly.
It's some kinda weird eurphoria.
 
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