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why would a sensible man look for a woman on Lit?

glBock said:
when I PMed you, Shiva, you sounded more interesting than afterwards. I take it you are trying to tell me now that your long silence between our last 2 PMs means, you are no longer interested either, in continuing.

Really polite people express something like that in a friendy private mail
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I was going to reply to your message, but someone kindly tipped me in the direction of this thread. Glad I didn't.
 
light_shiva said:
I was going to reply to your message, but someone kindly tipped me in the direction of this thread. Glad I didn't.
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That's a happy coincidence, Shiva. If your response time to my mails is 8 or more days, It's just as well that we two do not correspond with each other
 
Rainshine said:
You're clearly very unhappy with both the place and the women in it. Frankly it's surprising that you created one personals ad let alone five. Should we expect a sixth or will you finally realise that Lit is not AshleyMadison for misognists.
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Rainshine, it really touches my heart that YOU (and perhaps other litsters also) are eagerly awaiting my next personals ad. I will consider one, to allow you and the rest of the pack to take it apart and gloat over what you can find wrong in it.
 
Any woman I know would scan a man's posts here before engaging in private conversation with him. Out of curiosity after reading the OP's had five personal ads here since joining this year, I decided to see give them a read. Predictably, four of them have either no responses at all or contain only bumps from the OP. In the fifth, the OP begins condemning women for not meeting his standards. He got what he wanted: replies. He also received some good advice, but he clearly is above following it. I'm wondering if his game here is to neg women to invite responses because any interaction is better than no interaction, much like a child who is acting out.
 
BabblingBrooke said:
Any woman I know would scan a man's posts here before engaging in private conversation with him. Out of curiosity after reading the OP's had five personal ads here since joining this year, I decided to see give them a read. Predictably, four of them have either no responses at all or contain only bumps from the OP. In the fifth, the OP begins condemning women for not meeting his standards. He got what he wanted: replies. He also received some good advice, but he clearly is above following it. I'm wondering if his game here is to neg women to invite responses because any interaction is better than no interaction, much like a child who is acting out.
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I think you hit the nail right on the head with your suspicion.
 
Brooke, Shiva, and Rainshine, I am really glad that I am able to entertain the three of you with speculations on my faulty character. After your chatter on that subject dies down eventually, be sure to let me know when you feel bored again in the future.

I am virtually certain that I'll be able to revive your angry comments again, with something else I state here on Lit,
 
Sensible man? Seriously. This one?

Why would a sensible woman settle for this man on Lit? There are lots of quite delightful Litizens.
 
It looks like our boy Bock hasn't yet been able to corral some concubines.



glBock said:
I did not think that I would write another ad so soon. Because for the last several weeks I had been engaged in a mail exchange that I thought was just what I had been looking for.

Unfortunately it came to an end, when the lady involved began to accuse me of having a bad character. With some subtlety at first, and more massively later.

I am afraid that I belong into the category of men, who don't tick in a simple-minded manner. My relative openness and my inquisitive mind cannot be had without some "side effects", so it seems.

So I am afraid I must add a further qualifier to the description of the woman I seek: She must be willing and able to invest the effort that's needed to understand me. Without doubting my sincerity, when I tell her something that may go beyond her immediate cognitive capabilities. Some people are very complex human beings, and sometimes understanding them is not as easy as a famous new politician makes it out to be.

In return I can offer the woman I seek my commitment to aim for an understanding of her as well, without any judgement, even if she should turn out as complex a human being as I am. Below I will summarize briefly the other items I seek in a mail exchange with the right woman for me:

To me it matters less what kind of a woman you are. What matters far more are your attitudes and what you seek in a mail relationship. And that your wishes and desires harmonize with mine.

I am missing sufficient closeness (and intimacy in fact) with a woman, who craves erotica and lust as much as I do. That is my problem in a nutshell. And the only solution to my problem I can see, is finding a woman who feels like I do, AND who wants to attack our common problem by exchanging intimate mails with one another. It's as simple as that.

My signature post outlines what I hope such a mail exchange will bring both of us. If each of us is prepared to give as much as you and I want to get out. Once again here, in short, I hope for (erotic) excitement, for (interpersonal) empathy, and for (intellectual) intercourse involving erotica, but not stopping there. And – as a result – for an additional overall feeling that eliminates some of the emptiness in that respect, which we felt, before we began sending each other mails.

In case my words above resonate within you to some extent, I invite you to peruse the following posts I have writen also:
http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=1436470
http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=1421286

And if you feel that you tick a bit like me, and that you want the same as I want, why don't you send me a PM, and we'll get to know one another.
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After amusing myself for a bit with this thread - one thought sticks in my head that hasn't been touched on unless I missed it. How often do we connect with anyone around this silly place that lives close to where we are? I mean a cyber "relationship" is silly in itself as compared to a physical one so I'm not even going to approach it from that angle. If I truly wanted to find someone on here that perhaps may share in me sometimes weird views or wants, the likelihood of them being close enough to me to actually have a normal relationship is slim at best. And I live in charlotte which isn't exactly small. We come to this zoo from all over. Hell I once fell head over my high heels for a woman that lives in Australia for goodness sake. I cannot relate to expectations or even a faint hope that I would meet someone from Lit that matches well with me and actually lives near me.
 
beingtrue2me said:
After amusing myself for a bit with this thread - one thought sticks in my head that hasn't been touched on unless I missed it. How often do we connect with anyone around this silly place that lives close to where we are? I mean a cyber "relationship" is silly in itself as compared to a physical one so I'm not even going to approach it from that angle. If I truly wanted to find someone on here that perhaps may share in me sometimes weird views or wants, the likelihood of them being close enough to me to actually have a normal relationship is slim at best. And I live in charlotte which isn't exactly small. We come to this zoo from all over. Hell I once fell head over my high heels for a woman that lives in Australia for goodness sake. I cannot relate to expectations or even a faint hope that I would meet someone from Lit that matches well with me and actually lives near me.
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Being true, You wrote an amazing post, with some good thoughts in it. (wouldn't have thought that this might occur on "my" thread, with all the B.S. being posted here).

But I like to ask you: is a physical meeting really required for the magic to happen that I seek? It is not just a rhetorical question.

All that physical closeness gets two people is that they can go to bed with one another. And that they could live together, if they wanted to. And if they could in fact do that, if circumstances permitted.

But my aim, related to an e.mail exchange, is that the two of us cast our magic spell on one another WITHOUT all that. And I suspect that living together might actually become an impediment to magic. Besides the complications it would create for marriages that exist already.

The lady I mentioned in the post above (#96) and I have made up by now, and we keep writing each other mails. We experience the kind of "magic" I talk about in my post without seeing each other. Despite the fact that we could do that, since we live in the same city. But one reason why we don't, is that both of us are married. And both of us are afraid that if we experienced physical closeness – in addition to our present "only" mental closeness – a realistic danger might develop, that both of us might want to escape from our present marriages.

At the moment what we are doing with each other feels right! That may not continue forever, but it does now. We'll see how it all continues.

Thanks for your thoughts on this subject, Being true.
 
Depends on your definition of "magic" I suppose. I get it you can connect with someone thru email and chats and what not but not so sure if I can really get lost in someone without meeting them. Something about looking in their eyes that I have to have. I can get close to someone without a physical touch but to me at least, that isn't gonna be magic. Magic in my world is wanting them by my side thru the laughs and the tears. Having someone hold on to me when I want a good moment to be great or to be there to ask me whose ass we need to go kick when I am torn inside out. I don't see that ever happening on a porn site or any online forum for that matter. I hope it does for you but don't hold ya breath.
 
beingtrue2me said:
Depends on your definition of "magic" I suppose. I get it you can connect with someone thru email and chats and what not but not so sure if I can really get lost in someone without meeting them. Something about looking in their eyes that I have to have. I can get close to someone without a physical touch but to me at least, that isn't gonna be magic. Magic in my world is wanting them by my side thru the laughs and the tears. Having someone hold on to me when I want a good moment to be great or to be there to ask me whose ass we need to go kick when I am torn inside out. I don't see that ever happening on a porn site or any online forum for that matter. I hope it does for you but don't hold ya breath.
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Being true (to yourself), I admit that the problem you face is much more severe than my problem. I read your other post (on the thread that "adrift" started), also.

You see, I have experienced much of what you bemoan did not happen to you (yet), during my long life. And for me, what I am missing at this stage of my life, can in fact be accomplished by mails. So I believe, at least.

It is different for you, apparently. I wish you good fortunes with a happy ending, on your search for a life that is more fulfilling than what you experience now. Good luck! and keep up an optimistic spirit, if posible.
 
This bit of your post is sort of telling:

"I am afraid that I belong into the category of men, who don't tick in a simple-minded manner. My relative openness and my inquisitive mind cannot be had without some "side effects", so it seems.

So I am afraid I must add a further qualifier to the description of the woman I seek: She must be willing and able to invest the effort that's needed to understand me. Without doubting my sincerity, when I tell her something that may go beyond her immediate cognitive capabilities. Some people are very complex human beings, and sometimes understanding them is not as easy as a famous new politician makes it out to be. ... In return I can offer the woman I seek my commitment to aim for an understanding of her as well, without any judgement, even if she should turn out as complex a human being as I am."

So you're basically saying you're a fair bit smarter than most other people, and that people who aren't as smart as you should just take you at your word. And then you sort of imply that you'd be surprised to find a woman as 'complex' as you apparently are.
This just comes across as condescending ... I'm not simple-minded, and have pretty well-developed cognitive capabilities, but I personally wouldn't put up with this level of arrogance, unless you had some fairly good references to back it up with (like, you actually are Steven Hawking). Obviously this approach works for some women, given that you have apparently had a number of successful exchanges with various woman ... but it pretty much explains why the number is fairly small.
 
To answer this question id say because there are some women you may be compatible with but they are also geographically undesireable. Lit can overcome the geographically undesireable part.
 
Hello "Better Knower" Kim

I had been wondering all this time, Kim, how long it would take, until you appeared on the Scene again. Ready as always to conribute your two cents worth of wisdom. As if anybody had asked you.

It truly never ceases to amaze me, what supposedly "insightful" observations you make on any of my ads. It does not matter, what I write, Kim the better-knower is ready and willing to contribute her "mustard" as we say in German.

I really wonder, what you get out of this?

I don't suppose you ever ask yourself, whether your sharp observations and conclusions might be faulty sometimes, by any chance? After all, you cannot look into my head, and everything you pull out of your bag of supposed "wisdom" is pure conjecture.

Whether that may be your opinion that capitalizing words means shouting, or whether it applies to anything else you wrote, regarding my ads.

Why can you not simply LEAVE ME ALONE, Kim, and complain about your neigbors or the stores in your community or what not else?
 
glBock said:
I had been wondering all this time, Kim, how long it would take, until you appeared on the Scene again. Ready as always to conribute your two cents worth of wisdom. As if anybody had asked you.

It truly never ceases to amaze me, what supposedly "insightful" observations you make on any of my ads. It does not matter, what I write, Kim the better-knower is ready and willing to contribute her "mustard" as we say in German.

I really wonder, what you get out of this?

I don't suppose you ever ask yourself, whether your sharp observations and conclusions might be faulty sometimes, by any chance? After all, you cannot look into my head, and everything you pull out of your bag of supposed "wisdom" is pure conjecture.

Whether that may be your opinion that capitalizing words means shouting, or whether it applies to anything else you wrote, regarding my ads.

Why can you not simply LEAVE ME ALONE, Kim, and complain about your neigbors or the stores in your community or what not else?
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If you don't want people to engage with the 'why do have I have such terrible luck with women on Lit?' question, maybe stop asking it.
No one can look into your head. All they can do is respond to the ways in which you articulate that stuff. I'm suggesting that maybe the way you articulate that stuff is partially the cause of the terrible luck (and really, I'm far from the only woman who's made that suggestion). Did you think that just maybe the women on Lit have some insight into why you're having so many problems with the women on Lit?

I will admit that the protracted (and multi-participant) discussion on your personal ad probably was a bit uncalled for - personals aren't really the place for that sort of thing, and I apologise for contributing to that. But here you're posing a question on a board intended for engagement with the questions people pose.
 
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