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Ahoy, mateys! Happy Talk Like a Pirate day!

Dianthus

Dianthus

Literotica Guru
Joined
Jan 14, 2009
Posts
30,434
Avast and belay! September 19th is International Talk Like a Pirate Day.

All us scurvy dogs and beautiful wenches know talking like a pirate will imbue mundane conversations with an aura of romance and danger. Aye, so hoist your flag and show us what made The Roger so damned Jolly! Aarrrrr!

If you are a beginning buccanneer, here are some tips to get you started:
Ahoy – Hello
Avast! – Stand and give attention, or more simply, listen up!
Aye – I heartily agree with everything you just said or did.
Aye Aye – Yes, Sir! I’ll get right on that.
Aarrr! (Not aarrgh!) - Aarrr is the all-purpose pirate sound. It can mean, among other things, “Landlord, another tankard of ale, please” “I am well satisfied with this cheeseburger,” or “Hey y'all! Hear me talking like a pirate!”

Want a deeper look into your pirate persona?
Try this http://stupidstuff.org/main/piratemaker.htm.
 
I am:

Captain Bess Flint formally known as angel.

attachment.php
You enjoy ravishing young maidens so much that the Pirate Society gave you a Merit Badge. Unfortunately it also means you've been banned from most of the local convents, soda shops, whorehouses, and pre-schools. Arrrr, no one ever said the Pirate Life was easy!
 
I am
One-Eyed Tracy
(formerly known as Dianthus)

You're a crusty, vile piratess who never met a cannon she didn't like. You enjoy screaming "Avast, Ye Mateys" even when there are no mateys around. You'd gouge out your own mother's eye if you thought she was cheating you on your share of the booty.
 
I am

Black-Hearted Bob
(formerly known as Austin)


Your ship is so drenched with blood that people think it's a Mardi Gras float. This is okay because it means that the women, err, we mean "wenches" will often lift up their shirts as ye sail by. And you thought pirating had no career benefits!


199_pirate_wearing_an_eye_patch_and_hat.gif
 
Ye can call me Boatswain (Bosun)....Just Boatswain

Tis a fine day ta be taking to the seven seas. Swing the four pounders to starboard and prepare to advance on the QUeen Anne!

Tonight we dine in Tartuga!
 
And because I'm just a bit homesick today as well

A Pirate Looks at 40 by Jimmy Buffett

Mother, mother ocean, I have heard you call
Wanted to sail upon your waters since I was three feet tall
You've seen it all, you've seen it all

Watched the men who rode you switch from sails to steam
And in your belly you hold the treasures few have ever seen
Most of 'em dream, most of 'em dream

Yes I am a pirate, two hundred years too late
The cannons don't thunder, there's nothin' to plunder
I'm an over-forty victim of fate
Arriving too late, arriving too late

I've done a bit of smugglin', I've run my share of grass
I made enough money to buy Miami, but I pissed it away so fast
Never meant to last, never meant to last

And I have been drunk now for over two weeks
I passed out and I rallied and I sprung a few leaks
But I got stop wishin', got to go fishin'
Down to rock bottom again
Just a few friends, just a few friends

(instrumental)

I go for younger women, lived with several awhile
Though I ran 'em away, they'd come back one day
Still could manage to smile
Just takes a while, just takes a while

Mother, mother ocean, after all the years I've found
My occupational hazard being my occupation's just not around
I feel like I've drowned, gonna head uptown
 
Arrrr!

Nick The Gouger
(formerly known as jomar)

pirate07.jpg


Your ship is so drenched with blood that people think it's a Mardi Gras float. This is okay because it means that the women, err, we mean "wenches" will often lift up their shirts as ye sail by. And you thought pirating had no career benefits!
 
I be Busty Jenny Smythe, formerly the PassionatePatty, a city girl.

But in these parts, I be a mermaid from the Erotica, Literotica's own ship.

I be checkin' out this thread started by my own dear lusty wench friend, One-Eyed Tracy. She be a good matey and I dare any t'say otherwise!
 
The pirates cheered and set their sails to catch up with their prey
They sharpened up their knives and swords, their boat danced in the spray.
But suddenly they stopped their cheers, the wind it gave a moan,
For on the other ship there flew a flag of skull and bones.

And from bow to stern, from mast to mast, flying everywhere
There flapped and snapped five hundred pairs of pilfered underwear –
Boxers big and boxers small, with stripes and polka dots
And tighty-whities hung there too, like the ones your grandpa’s got.

And lined up on that other deck, armed with swords and knives
Was a sight that made the men all shake and fear for their own lives
A hundred pirate women waved their daggers and their swords
And the woman pirate captain yelled “Now, girls let’s climb aboard!”

“It’s Stinky Annie” someone said, “and her band of smelly varmints.
She captures every boat she can and takes their undergarments.”
“Then all is lost,” another said, “we don’t have a chance
You can’t be a pirate if you don’t have underpants.”

199_pirate_wearing_an_eye_patch_and_hat.gif
 
good grief! :eek::eek:

You Are:
Hot Hole Harriet
(formerly known as Kimberly)



Avast Ye, Ye Scaliwag! After a hard day of firing the cannons, running your victims into reefs, boarding their ships, stealing their booty and then putting them all to death, you like to relax with a bubble bath and a romance novel. But what else is a Pirate Lass to do after work, anyway?
 
kimbalee said:
good grief! :eek::eek:

You Are:
Hot Hole Harriet
(formerly known as Kimberly)



Avast Ye, Ye Scaliwag! After a hard day of firing the cannons, running your victims into reefs, boarding their ships, stealing their booty and then putting them all to death, you like to relax with a bubble bath and a romance novel. But what else is a Pirate Lass to do after work, anyway?
Click to expand...


HH Harriet! :rose:

Welcome aboard, ye dear wench!
 
Arrr, ye ladies are quite a sight fer me ol scurvy eyes... Patty!
 
kimbalee said:
good grief! :eek::eek:

You Are:
Hot Hole Harriet
(formerly known as Kimberly)



Avast Ye, Ye Scaliwag! After a hard day of firing the cannons, running your victims into reefs, boarding their ships, stealing their booty and then putting them all to death, you like to relax with a bubble bath and a romance novel. But what else is a Pirate Lass to do after work, anyway?
Click to expand...

:D:D:D Kimmee, that is so you! I mean, Aye, ye bold wench, that be a perrrrfect description of the scaliwag ye be!
 
Avast, ye winsome wenches! It be Cap'n 'Wetstick' Morgan wantin' your attention. I'm lookin' for a crew of lovely lasses to man my ship, "The White Witch" and sail the seven seas in search of treasures and booty. If we have an accord to join my ranks, acquiese to me in my cabin and then we set sail for a journey. Arrrr, I loves a good blow to fill me sails!!:D
 
Austin8 said:
Arrr, ye ladies are quite a sight fer me ol scurvy eyes... Patty!
Click to expand...

Black Heart Bob, ye be a postin' in this thread I see. Aye, tis good to talk with ya matey.

Be it known to ye this day, mate, that I not be "Patty" but be Jenny... ;)
 
PassionatePatty said:
Black Heart Bob, ye be a postin' in this thread I see. Aye, tis good to talk with ya matey.

Be it known to ye this day, mate, that I not be "Patty" but be Jenny... ;)
Click to expand...

Arrr damnit Arrr I missed that! How ye be doin you lusty wench!
 
Aye, it's grand day for bein' a pirate. Ye landlubbers take heed when Wetstick and his crew are afoot. We be off to our favourite pub, "The Cock n' Pussy" for a tankard of ale and hear the sweet lilting voices of our favourite singers, Cunty McPeeflaps and the Whistling Clits, singin' our favourite song, Barnacle Bill the Sailor.
"Who's that knocking at my door? Who's that knocking at my door? Who's that knocking at my door? Said the fair young maiden.

"It's me and me crew, we come for a screw." said Barnacle Bill the Sailor.

Join in everyone and sing along with us
 
I am...

Captian Plunder:

Why, Blow Me Down, Matey! Nothing gets you riled up like an uppity deckhand and you'll whip 'em, flay 'em, and put 'em in irons if they so much as serve your crumpets a little too cold. Why you're having crumpets instead of grog is anybody's guess.

How much did the pirate's som pay for his earings?

A buck an ear!

Terrible, I know. :)
 
I be Black John Cash--Me ship is so drenched with blood that people think it's a Mardi Gras float. This is okay because it means that the "wenches" will often lift up their shirts as Oy sail by. And yer thought piratin' had no career benefits! Arrrrr . . .


pirate05.jpg
 
voluptuary_manque said:
I be Black John Cash--Me ship is so drenched with blood that people think it's a Mardi Gras float. This is okay because it means that the "wenches" will often lift up their shirts as Oy sail by. And yer thought piratin' had no career benefits! Arrrrr . . .


pirate05.jpg
Click to expand...

Arrr John Cash how ye be matey?

whars me lusty wench Harriet the hot one today... Arrrr
 
voluptuary_manque said:
I be Black John Cash--Me ship is so drenched with blood that people think it's a Mardi Gras float. This is okay because it means that the "wenches" will often lift up their shirts as Oy sail by. And yer thought piratin' had no career benefits! Arrrrr . . .


pirate05.jpg
Click to expand...

Bear! :kiss: If ye be Johnny Cash of course ye be dressed in black! Aaarrrrr! :D
 
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