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Requesting help w/ text messages in dialogue

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PaigeMcAbee

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I'd appreciate any advice offered on using text messages in a story. To date, I've summarized them in the narrative but think the actual messages would have more impact as part of the dialogue.

"Where are you?" John texted
"Where are you?" John asked in his text.

Both examples seem wordy and lack flow. Also, the replies to John present a challenge because a constant repetition of the words "text, texted, or text messaged" is annoying.

Would italics be used on this part of dialogue?

I searched the threads but couldn't find the answer.

Thanks for your assistance.
 
You could identify it as a text message exchange in the preceding narrative and then handle it like play dialogue:

John: "Where are you?"

Mary: "Right in front of you. Get your face out of your screen and look up."
 
I like that. The exchange would catch the reader's eye without obstructing the flow. Thanks!
 
PaigeMcAbee said:
Also, the replies to John present a challenge because a constant repetition of the words "text, texted, or text messaged" is annoying.
Click to expand...

Once you have established that two people are engaged in a text conversation, there is no reason to keep reinforcing that they are texting. In fact, you don't even need to repeat their names in an extended conversation. For example:

Mary's phone buzzed, alerting her to an incoming text. It was from John.

"Where are you?" he asked.

"I'm home," Mary replied.

"Why aren't you at work?"

"I got fired."

"What?! Why?"

"Because I spent too much time answering your fucking texts."
 
Maybe, but readers--at least some readers--lose track much faster than authors tend to think they do. This is prevalent even in mainstream published novels these days.
 
Obviously, there is a limit. Point taken that the author may have a skewed sense of what's clear. After all, he knows who's talking. If done in moderation, though, I like the way it flows better.

Did you find my example hard to follow?
 
It's not difficult to follow at all but here's another twist to the question. What if a third person was speaking directly to John while he's texting Mary?

"Where is she?" "What did she say?"

Thanks
 
Obviously adding a third person or more into the conversation results in the potential for ambiguity and you need to "name names" or provide other clues as to who is talking.

Still, the main point that addresses your initial concern is that a text dialog is still just that, a dialog. Once the reader knows that Joe is not in the room with Mary and is communicating via text, you can use normal dialog expressions like: 'Joe said' and 'Mary replied' and the reader will understand that the 'saying' and 'replying' is still happening via text.

There is no reason you need to say 'Joe texted.'

Your reader is not going to assume that Joe suddenly burst into the room and is now speaking directly to Mary unless you tell them that's what happened.
 
PaigeMcAbee said:
It's not difficult to follow at all but here's another twist to the question. What if a third person was speaking directly to John while he's texting Mary?

"Where is she?" "What did she say?"

Thanks
Click to expand...

In that sort of scene, I italicise the texts to distinguish them from actual speech.
 
How about like this?

Me:
WOW! Awesome, Congrats Liv.

Olivia:
Thanks! I can’t wait 4 U to see this thing, it’s crazy! You on tonight?

Me:
Yeah, 7-7. You? want a ride?

Olivia:
Yep and Yep. Thx. 630?

Me:
Sure, see ya soon
 
Last edited:
Nope. Bolding is pretty much a taboo in text anywhere in publishing. It's not reader friendly.
 
That's essentially what I suggested (there's no reason for a line skip between the name and the message). The suggestion later of italics is fine too, as long as there isn't a lot of that. Publishing doesn't approve of large sections of italics either.
 
sr71plt said:
Nope. Bolding is pretty much a taboo in text anywhere in publishing. It's not reader friendly.
Click to expand...

Can't remember where, but I saw a good explanation of this:

Italics function as local emphasis. They don't jump out and grab you, but when you get to the italicised word you notice them.

Bold catches the eye from a long way off. You probably saw this sentence before you noticed the italics in the line above. So bolding changes the order in which the text is read. Usually that's undesirable.

Bolding can be useful on the rare occasions where you really do want to tweak the reading order. Let's suppose I'm quoting a news article:

The Presidential candidate said he wanted to lower taxes, improve relations with North Syldavia, reduce crime rates, and double the size of the armed forces
Click to expand...

Here, bolding is helpful because I want to change the order in which people read that quote; it encourages them to see "lower taxes" right up against "double the size of the armed forces" so they notice the contradiction. The bits in between are less important, left in only so readers can check that I haven't changed the meaning of the quote.
 
Bramblethorn said:
Can't remember where, but I saw a good explanation of this:

Italics function as local emphasis. They don't jump out and grab you, but when you get to the italicised word you notice them.

Bold catches the eye from a long way off. You probably saw this sentence before you noticed the italics in the line above. So bolding changes the order in which the text is read. Usually that's undesirable.

Bolding can be useful on the rare occasions where you really do want to tweak the reading order. Let's suppose I'm quoting a news article:



Here, bolding is helpful because I want to change the order in which people read that quote; it encourages them to see "lower taxes" right up against "double the size of the armed forces" so they notice the contradiction. The bits in between are less important, left in only so readers can check that I haven't changed the meaning of the quote.
Click to expand...

It's worse than that with bolding. It obliterates surrounding text and the reader tends only to read the bolding--ergo completely losing the full context. Every mainstream publisher I've edited for has an absolute taboo on the use of bolding in the text.
 
Thank you all for the clarification. That makes sense but I'd never thought about it like that. Deleting some bold from my story now :)
 
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