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Question for the ladies...

Yes. I think women are definitely sometimes too embarrassed to do new things with an established partner. Doesn't mean they don't want to.
 
Anomaly1964 said:
I have never thought of this before...

Maybe the conservative, mother of my kids is too embarrassed to tell me she wants a toy...that she imagines other men/women...?
Click to expand...

You might never know unless you try/ask. Maybe peruse a toy site or encourage her to go to a toy party with her friends and see if she has a positive reaction.
 
I was a conservative wife, but my husband just opened up and told me his fantasies which then opened me up. Be subtle at ask her or tell her a fantasy.

L:rose:
 
I think it is partially true. A husband is part of the family and there are certain ways you want your fairly to think of you and being a slut is usually not one of them. I suspect there are a number of women that would like to do some kinky things but would not ask or even permit their husband to know. They might very well open up more to a lover than their husband. Probably more true of my generation than later ones.
 
Anomaly1964 said:
I have been talking to someone about my wife, and no, I don't talk trash about her, I do love her...

That said, this person said that if they were to seduce my wife that she would be more likely to do things with them that she will not do with me because of what she feels my expectations of her are vs. someone new, that she would not want to say NO to some of the things she says NO to me about because she would be trying to please or impress them, that they could train her to be and do more with them than me because it would be a fresh start...

They feel they could train my very conservative wife to be a woman that craves and wants sex all the time because that would make the new person happy and because the expectations were set up and she was trained that way...

So ladies, do you feel this to be true? Could someone new turn you into a TOTALLY different woman than you are at home?
Click to expand...

I can tell you from experience it is very true. I was one of those conservative in church every sunday woman that wouldn't let loose with my husband (not that he tried). I met another man and he had me instantly more adventurous and open to much more.
 
Sometimes it's hard to get out of a rut... A good imagination, creativity, and a willingness to say fuck it and suggest something new helps. I was once a conservative. What a load of bs. :)
 
As a male..

I have experienced a lover becoming more adventurous. I think it has a lot to do with her fear of being judged by her partner/husband.

It might help to take a vacation to a new place. New surroundings may make opening up to new things easier.
 
Other man sometimes means other reactions.

My first wife and I were in a full swapping relationship with her female best friend and friend's husband. (This was back in the very early 1980's.) My wife and I would have sex together and it was fairly conservative. However, when we got together with the other couple and swapped partners, she was a different lover in many ways. There were times I would watch her with the other guy and her movements, mannerisms and the way she talked were very different than when she was having sex with me.

We talked about it from time to time and when I first brought up the subject, she seemed surprised at first. She thought she was fucking him the same way she fucked me. I guess she got so lost in the moment she just didn't realize what was going on. Her best friend even told her, "When you are fucking MY man, you just sound different than when you are fucking your hubby." And, her best friend's hubby said the exact same thing about his wife and how she sounded much different when she was fucking me versus when she fucked him. It made for some spirited conversations now and then! My wife seemed to be more open to what the other man wanted to do, sexually, even when we were all in the same room together. Maybe it is the old saying, "The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence", but who knows for sure? Sometimes, just doing something different brings out the differences in the way people act.
 
The answer depends on the couple. Although I have fidelity issues, they have never been from my husband lacking sexually or emotionally. I will do anything for my husband. He is so good and caring and it always excites me because he knows me and my body so well (over 20 years). I have done things with other men that I don't do with my husband, but it is not because he is my husband. I will say this - the married men I have been with, have done things with me they have told me "their wives will not do"
 
Yes in many cases this would be true. My own example. I have many submissive fantasies about being taken/used etc. But could never see my husband in a dominant role to do this kind of thing. I fear that if he tried such a thing, I'd laugh at him, cause that's just not who he is.

but I would gladly submit to someone who I believe to be truly dominant already.
 
Riley69 said:
My first wife and I were in a full swapping relationship with her female best friend and friend's husband. (This was back in the very early 1980's.) My wife and I would have sex together and it was fairly conservative. However, when we got together with the other couple and swapped partners, she was a different lover in many ways. There were times I would watch her with the other guy and her movements, mannerisms and the way she talked were very different than when she was having sex with me.

We talked about it from time to time and when I first brought up the subject, she seemed surprised at first. She thought she was fucking him the same way she fucked me. I guess she got so lost in the moment she just didn't realize what was going on. Her best friend even told her, "When you are fucking MY man, you just sound different than when you are fucking your hubby." And, her best friend's hubby said the exact same thing about his wife and how she sounded much different when she was fucking me versus when she fucked him. It made for some spirited conversations now and then! My wife seemed to be more open to what the other man wanted to do, sexually, even when we were all in the same room together. Maybe it is the old saying, "The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence", but who knows for sure? Sometimes, just doing something different brings out the differences in the way people act.
Click to expand...

This reflects my experience as well. Both my wife and I behaved differently, more erotically, with partners from outside our marriage than we did with each other.
 
No, for me, I have a husband who completely changed the way I viewed sex and how I felt about myself as a sexual woman. I could not ask for a more giving, loving and adventurous man. He is eveything I want in a man, lover and husband.
 
ForeverDreaming said:
Yes in many cases this would be true. My own example. I have many submissive fantasies about being taken/used etc. But could never see my husband in a dominant role to do this kind of thing. I fear that if he tried such a thing, I'd laugh at him, cause that's just not who he is.

but I would gladly submit to someone who I believe to be truly dominant already.
Click to expand...

After thinking about your statement for a bit, I think you nailed it. Another man, not necessarily a Dom, but a dominant personality. Someone who would guide you to new experiences more naturally?
 
I think it's true. I find myself doing things on here that I would never dream of doing with my husband because like someone said above, it's just not who he is
 
Hipshot1554 said:
After thinking about your statement for a bit, I think you nailed it. Another man, not necessarily a Dom, but a dominant personality. Someone who would guide you to new experiences more naturally?
Click to expand...

Yes. If he was this way to begin with, I might believe him in that role. But that is just an example. It could be anything. Any type of personality. If it's just not who he is, I can't believe it, or feel it.
 
ForeverDreaming said:
Yes. If he was this way to begin with, I might believe him in that role. But that is just an example. It could be anything. Any type of personality. If it's just not who he is, I can't believe it, or feel it.
Click to expand...
It must be someone you feel comfortable with, taking the lead?
 
Anomaly1964 said:
I have been talking to someone about my wife, and no, I don't talk trash about her, I do love her...

That said, this person said that if they were to seduce my wife that she would be more likely to do things with them that she will not do with me because of what she feels my expectations of her are vs. someone new, that she would not want to say NO to some of the things she says NO to me about because she would be trying to please or impress them, that they could train her to be and do more with them than me because it would be a fresh start...

They feel they could train my very conservative wife to be a woman that craves and wants sex all the time because that would make the new person happy and because the expectations were set up and she was trained that way...

So ladies, do you feel this to be true? Could someone new turn you into a TOTALLY different woman than you are at home?
Click to expand...



Nope. Don't buy it. You are, who you are.
 
Again......

All women are different so it's hard to generalize but for me personally I love to impress a new guy......almost as much as I love to impress a longtime lover. In general the best sex I've had is with a long term partner, but a few of my one night stands were probably a little more kinky than my day to day sex, so I guess I would agree that a married women would try more with a one night stand than with her husband, but eventually it would tapper off to a comfortable level for her.....but I'm not your average housewife, lol
 
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