a question for all on literotica

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I can't imagine the pain you've endured...and your right...when you love that deeply it is a matter of living or dying. However, I will add... there is a part of you that dies....and stays dead. It's like a scar...it heals, but the reminder is always there. My angst is not from a death but betrayal, which scars differently. Both unimaginable pain.

I can't speak for anyone but myself, but when you love deeply, with everthing that you are, and that love is betrayed, it is implausible to expect that you will ever reach that euphoric state again. Perhaps close, or in a different way, but the damage is still done. Like putting a nail in the wall. You can fill the hole, repair and patch, but it is NEVER the same.

When it happens enough times, it's NOT that you don't put yourself out there, but do some MORE cautiously, LESS freely and with a pensive process that can be infuriating for the "other person". Forgiveness is easy.... forgetting impossible with out the benefit of time, tenderness and someone patient enuff to understand. The eventuality is that you become detached .... and are incapable of loving beyond the surface, which is GREAT in some cases. Horrible, but the truth is... I've developed an I feel good, you feel good mentality. The moment the lust moves beyond those emotions... I am unwilling and incapable of anything more...
 
never say never

You could find new or fix old. Just don't give up



(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((DenverFunGuy))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

I can't imagine the pain you've endured...and your right...when you love that deeply it is a matter of living or dying. However, I will add... there is a part of you that dies....and stays dead. It's like a scar...it heals, but the reminder is always there. My angst is not from a death but betrayal, which scars differently. Both unimaginable pain.

I can't speak for anyone but myself, but when you love deeply, with everthing that you are, and that love is betrayed, it is implausible to expect that you will ever reach that euphoric state again. Perhaps close, or in a different way, but the damage is still done. Like putting a nail in the wall. You can fill the hole, repair and patch, but it is NEVER the same.

When it happens enough times, it's NOT that you don't put yourself out there, but do some MORE cautiously, LESS freely and with a pensive process that can be infuriating for the "other person". Forgiveness is easy.... forgetting impossible with out the benefit of time, tenderness and someone patient enuff to understand. The eventuality is that you become detached .... and are incapable of loving beyond the surface, which is GREAT in some cases. Horrible, but the truth is... I've developed an I feel good, you feel good mentality. The moment the lust moves beyond those emotions... I am unwilling and incapable of anything more...
 
no one

No one should ever give up you never know how close you may be so close to the person that will be the love of your life may be someone youi have already made love to but he or she may just have a different idea of what is perfect and you may not be it. Then again maybe you are and he or she has just not looked at you in that light. Maybe the time is just not right for the other person in your life. Everyone has history and sometimes they are just not ready for someone or even anyone to be part of there life more than just friends with some wonderful benefits. You can be a fool and want more and not see the incredible opportunity you have been given (I'm talking to the guys here) (as well as about my self). I can not only stumble and let out what I am feeling and say things that change the way your looked at. Or you (me) can thank her and your (my) lucky stars that someone has let you in. In as in friendship. In as in lover in as into her bed. In as in to her arms. If you over step her boundaries chastise your self. But let her know its ok and your willin to do less want less and love less. But let her know she is worth it.
 
when you love deeply, with everthing that you are, and that love is betrayed, it is implausible to expect that you will ever reach that euphoric state again. Perhaps close, or in a different way, but the damage is still done. Like putting a nail in the wall. You can fill the hole, repair and patch, but it is NEVER the same.

When it happens enough times, it's NOT that you don't put yourself out there, but do some MORE cautiously, LESS freely and with a pensive process that can be infuriating for the "other person". Forgiveness is easy.... forgetting impossible with out the benefit of time, tenderness and someone patient enuff to understand.

So true
 
maybe it is true

Maybe it is true and for both of you. I see that is the way you feel about it. Am I way outside the norm or is it just that my hurt had nothing to do with betrayal? I have had a girlfriend that I was under the impression that we would get married someday. I left for the military and with out a break up she ended up pregnant with someone else's child so I too have had the betrayal hurt.
I don't think anyone has ever lived a life and fallen in love without some type of hurt. But back to my point about not giving up the hurt if it ment not feeling the love that made it hurt. Is not feeling the love and the falling worth the risk or being hurt? Is the hurt worse than the good you feel when your in love?
I have learned to look at the good and not the bad. I understand that not every relationship will work. I'm not going to stop trying cuz I might get hurt. I also place myself out there and am willing to fall in love when I feel it. But I have also learned that you can push people away in so many ways. By being jealous is more than likely the quickest way to end a relationship. You get defensive and say things that are not only untrue but hurtful to the person your trying to love.
You can be too much in love too soon. You scare the one in your life. (This one is me) sorry to say! I've fallin in love and said so Way too soon. I was just lucky enough that the person of my affection didn't run from me but was open enough to let me know and I backed off and let the friendship go back to building.
Yes I've been lucky I've had some wonderful loves in my life. And hope I have many more. Will I ever have just one for the rest of my life? Not likely but I have been surprised in the past. I just might be again. I keep looking.

 
Maybe it is true and for both of you. I see that is the way you feel about it. Am I way outside the norm or is it just that my hurt had nothing to do with betrayal? I have had a girlfriend that I was under the impression that we would get married someday. I left for the military and with out a break up she ended up pregnant with someone else's child so I too have had the betrayal hurt.
I don't think anyone has ever lived a life and fallen in love without some type of hurt. But back to my point about not giving up the hurt if it ment not feeling the love that made it hurt. Is not feeling the love and the falling worth the risk or being hurt? Is the hurt worse than the good you feel when your in love?
I have learned to look at the good and not the bad. I understand that not every relationship will work. I'm not going to stop trying cuz I might get hurt. I also place myself out there and am willing to fall in love when I feel it. But I have also learned that you can push people away in so many ways. By being jealous is more than likely the quickest way to end a relationship. You get defensive and say things that are not only untrue but hurtful to the person your trying to love.
You can be too much in love too soon. You scare the one in your life. (This one is me) sorry to say! I've fallin in love and said so Way too soon. I was just lucky enough that the person of my affection didn't run from me but was open enough to let me know and I backed off and let the friendship go back to building.
Yes I've been lucky I've had some wonderful loves in my life. And hope I have many more. Will I ever have just one for the rest of my life? Not likely but I have been surprised in the past. I just might be again. I keep looking.


I don't think you're abnormal Denverguy. Betrayal does not have to involve infidelity. I agree jealousy is a useless emotion. Most have nothing to be jealous of. If your lover does not find you to be "enough"... let them drive through please.....Regardless of how the hurt is attained, the pain is similar. When it comes to love and the fickle nuances that go with it... at this point in my life, it is better NOT to love..... but to be satisfied with the carnal pleasures life can offer, without the complications of emotions. Admittedly, when there is LOVE there is an unmatched intensity in the physical connection, however one that can be pseudo replicated with a skilled lover.

I prefer not to over extend my abilities to "feel" too much, because of the intensity of emotions. Remember, for every reaction there is an equally powerful opposing reaction.

Content to be lusted after, have INCREDIBLE physical connections without the complications of deeper emotions. Thus the I feel good you feel good mentality. I am content to live my life somewhat detached. Stone can eventually be changed with the deliberate flow of "water"..... and I've cried too many tears and endured enough darkness, to ever want to re-visit that particular place again.
 
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wish we could

Wish we could get rid of the spammers. I know the ignore works and yes it does work but we all end up on page 3.
 
lol far too many other good posters on this thread.... we don't pay attention to them anyway....
 
yes

I am very lucky to have placed my thread on a board as open as lit. And to have as many beautiful women post to it as I have. And to have as many readers as I do. Oh and by beautiful I don't want any one with low self esteem to exclude your self. The women here are all beautiful. Your minds are the things dreams are made of. Lurk if you must but your all welcome to post or if your too shy to post PM and if your too shy to PM I wish you well but if I don't know your there we can't have any fun. WEG.

Thanks WckdnWild. Your too sweet


lol far too many other good posters on this thread.... we don't pay attention to them anyway....
 
just keeping ahead of the spammers

I'm surprised that lit has let this go on as long as it has. Thank goodness for the ignore feature. And thanks everyone.
 
grins around... a round... grins... you decide!



>Weg< all appropriate golf terminology I promise... it's subject to the interpretation of the reader....so if it's dirty...must be cause your mind is where mine is, too?! ~_*

honestly... i wasn't trying to make it sound dirty or seductive, or anything...just making full use of the colloquial to comment on the pleasure one can derive from golf...

Yeah thats where my mind usually is.
 
have to say

Just have to say this is one hell of a fun place WEG. Some of the shy and lurking women once you let your curiosity get the best of you,..... Well thanks. Lol
 
open

Wow just had an incredible two days. Hope everyone has the good fortune to meet wonderful people. Lit truly is a wonderful place. Friends someone you can connect with on some level but give the truth and set no expectations that can't be met and you will never hurt anyone. Well we will try to never hurt anyone. That is unless they want to be hurt. Grin just hurt no ones heart.
 
best

its always best to give truth and pass up an opertunity than to give false hope and use someone. I could not live with myself if I did this to anyone.
 
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I would enjoy your company I know that. No where really just have not been on here. :)

*grins* enjoy my company? ha! you have no idea how "bad" my company can be at times. What is it that you do Craig? I should have asked that in a PM.........

Glad to know you are okay though and your hiatus was not permanent! Hope you are having a GREAT weekend!!!............
 
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