Sweetemmygirl
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Apr 25, 2016
- Posts
- 3,395
Let's look at these one at a time.
Now, where do you go from here? I think it's worth doing some reflection about this body-type preference. Is it truly fundamental to you or is it just a default starting place for your fantasy life? What is it about body types that really matters to you? I'm somewhat short and I always found it a bit unnerving to date women who were taller than me. I preferred to feel physically larger.
- Unless you've already brought up to her your ambivalence about her weight, you haven't yet been an asshole. Meeting someone you met online because you thought the two of you had a connection is not an asshole act. Meeting her solely to get laid, on the other hand, would qualify.
- I am very leery of the idea of making self-improvement a part of the dominance/submission arrangement because it usually causes more problems than it fixes. It might be possible for you to help her meet personal goals in a fully established relationship, but I would argue long and hard against setting up any kind of punishment system connected with this help.
- If exercise has become important to her, of course it would be goods to encourage her. But I wouldn't give it too much special attention unless she asks for it in some way.
- Your last question is unclear, but it seems like you're asking if you should ignore the mismatch between her reality and your apparent body-type preference. No, as wicked woman said, it's your issue and not hers. If you own it fully, you won't ignore it.
When she smiles at you, how do you respond? Do you find yourself avoiding her over her body type or are you drawn to her regardless? As Obi-Wan would say, search your feelings.
I came to maturity feeling a preference for somewhat petite women, but I have loved women deeply who were not petite. I wondered how this could be and I came to the conclusion that my preference was more about my fantasy life than reality. In the end, I came to understand that the very best thing about my lover's body was that it was attached to her. You see, if a 200 pound woman loses eighty pounds, she does not become a different woman. Neither does the little petite 120-pounder become someone different if she packs on some pounds.
Search your feelings, Luke.
Thank you for this. Your insight is truly heartwarming. I'm a bigger girl and have been in similar situations. I don't hide what I look like. There is no need for me to do so. I was in a chatting situation where the guy and I clicked on so many levels. I really thought we were great friends and we agreed to not send pics until later. When we finally did, it ended our friendship in a very devastating way. I was crushed.
Be honest with yourself and her. I don't wish any person to experience what I did. Its better to nd things now before deeper feelings are involved.
Good luck.