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Making friends in a new state.

Conager said:
Who could blame you? Bunch of damned carnivores!

Foulin' the air in the neigborhood with the stench of mesquite and tri-tip in the air. . .
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:confused:

I'm married to a butcher. Meat doesn't bother me.

I don't like people asking me for things, like tools and cookware when I'm at home pantsless without a bra on. I'll gladly dole out baked goods to everyone in my neighborhood but I don't want the familiarity that being friends with them brings.
 
Wings said:
:confused:

I'm married to a butcher. Meat doesn't bother me.

I don't like people asking me for things, like tools and cookware when I'm at home pantsless without a bra on. I'll gladly dole out baked goods to everyone in my neighborhood but I don't want the familiarity that being friends with them brings.
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I suspect it might be the pantsless/braless combo causing the procession of people looking to borrow stuff rather than the well-stocked pegboard.

I'm on the fence that makes good neighbors about setting good boundaries and staying aloof. I liked knowing my neighbors until I moved in next to the neighbor from hell years ago. They never SEEM like TNFH, until they are. The nosy ones seem friendly at first. Should not have ignored the warning signs when they helpfully warned us about this neighbor and that.

Moving across the tracks myself soon. Going to miss my immediate neighbor. Good guy, trust him with my life. I once took off leaving my door hanging open and $600 sitting on the counter on accident. He closed the door and made sure he kept an eye on it for me till I got back since there's no way to lock it from the outside without a key.

The other neighbor, and cousin of the guy that owns this place reminds me of the Tom Watts song, "What is he building?" Remodeling at all hours, borrowing money. My friend warned me not to trust him an inch. The last 20 he never paid back was a spund investment in keeping him to himself.

I think you pick and choose, but seems silly to rule out all neighbors. Propinquity is the number one indicia of social organizing according to anthropologists.

Good luck in any event.
 
Conager said:
I suspect it might be the pantsless/braless combo causing the procession of people looking to borrow stuff rather than the well-stocked pegboard.

I'm on the fence that makes good neighbors about setting good boundaries and staying aloof. I liked knowing my neighbors until I moved in next to the neighbor from hell years ago. They never SEEM like TNFH, until they are. The nosy ones seem friendly at first. Should not have ignored the warning signs when they helpfully warned us about this neighbor and that.

Moving across the tracks myself soon. Going to miss my immediate neighbor. Good guy, trust him with my life. I once took off leaving my door hanging open and $600 sitting on the counter on accident. He closed the door and made sure he kept an eye on it for me till I got back since there's no way to lock it from the outside without a key.

The other neighbor, and cousin of the guy that owns this place reminds me of the Tom Watts song, "What is he building?" Remodeling at all hours, borrowing money. My friend warned me not to trust him an inch. The last 20 he never paid back was a spund investment in keeping him to himself.

I think you pick and choose, but seems silly to rule out all neighbors. Propinquity is the number one indicia of social organizing according to anthropologists.

Good luck in any event.
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I've been in construction for a long time, my tools are top notch and plentiful so it's probably not my common state of undress.

But either way, I don't mind being friendly with any of them, I just don't want to be too close because I have a very low tolerance for racism or meanness. That's hard to know up front and I hate to commit to friendship if I wind up being disgusted by them.

Highlight of the new area though is that it's so much more diverse and I'm so happy about that.
 
Places you visit regularly. Bus commute, dog walking park, local market, gym...
 
Do things you are interested in, meet ups, volunteer, take a class.
In Chicago, I used to meet people on the commuter train, through historic preservation groups, film clubs, stuff like that.
It's easier in the city, but I did make some friends in the burbs too.
 
like they said, meetup.com
i've been part of meetup book clubs and hiking groups for years, met lots of nice folks

i also like the idea behind the origin of meetup
 
Take a class one day/week at the local community college. (ceramics, etc if nothing else.) Find a hobby store nearby and take a hobby class (cake decorating, etc).

Sports are always good. Bicycling groups/clubs are everywhere. So are skydiving and hot air ballooning and all kinds of other things like that.

Dinner clubs if you want to cook and visit over meals.

Meetup and there's another one (*something* singles).
 
Wings said:
Friendship without sex is hard to find!
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That's why I don't bother making my life difficult! :D

I kid, I kid. I think actual friends on any level from casual to deep happen organically, so I never try to push or directly seek them. Water seeks its own level and all that. It also helps that I'm both social and solitary by choice, and in a major city that gives me options for enjoying both, despite the expense.

However, I think that we're living in a premium age for having the best access and opportunity to making friends happen, with social media and networking. Sky's the limit, really.
 
Some good ideas in this thread, but I like the sport, gym ones best.

I have met a gazillion people through playing sport and surfing. I see my netball girls twice a week. The good thing about about sport is that most of the women are active and fun and easy going. The bad thing is when they want to have sex with you but you already have a missus. But other than that it's really cool.

So funny you say Chicago. I was offered a job there 4 or 5 years ago. Good luck and I hope you meet lots of good cunts.
 
Saint Peter said:
I moved to a new state and feel your pain. My friends here are work friends, not friend friends. I know my neighbors, and they are nice people and all of that, but we do not go out for burgers and a show.

Basically I am no help to you until you visit DC. :) Then it is game on!
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Ditto. Especially in a different country and I don't speak French. All of my friends are back home. I have the husband's friends but that is not the same.

Facebook has local community groups. I found that it was a good way to meet people, get involved with community activities.
 
I've been here like 3 years now and I don't have any friends. I'm too shy to approach people, or they just don't like me. I've tried to be social and try different things, but I never get invited into a group or anything.
 
pollynova said:
I've been here like 3 years now and I don't have any friends. I'm too shy to approach people, or they just don't like me. I've tried to be social and try different things, but I never get invited into a group or anything.
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aw. :(
you haven't chased down that jogger chick yet?
 
I have a hard time making friends in my old state. :(

You come across as quite interesting, witty, and friendly so I bet with some time, you'll be surrounded by friends.
 
pollynova said:
I've been here like 3 years now and I don't have any friends. I'm too shy to approach people, or they just don't like me. I've tried to be social and try different things, but I never get invited into a group or anything.
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563_1000.gif
 
raindancer said:
I have a hard time making friends in my old state. :(

You come across as quite interesting, witty, and friendly so I bet with some time, you'll be surrounded by friends.
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You're sweet but I'm pretty antisocial so it's hard to just connect with anyone. I am going to try the meet up thing though.
 
I tell you what, I'll do it and you do it too and we can compare notes.
 
I have a Jeep. There's no need to go out and meet any kooky humans.




Nor do I have any money left to do anything even if I wanted to.
 
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