New Poetry Recommendations

bluebell7 said:

Epiphany65 submitted a poem called 4th Street, Positively, which starts out really pretty well, descriptive and interesting:

my words poured out
like hot coffee
she drank them,
then asked for a refill

But the last three lines of the poem stump me. I don't know whether I'm being a daft thing or what but it was almost like switching the TV channel right at the end of a movie. I understand the sentiment, I just don't understand how it was worded. Otherwise, a fine effort.

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Thanks for the kind review. I wrote the poem about my girlfriend, whose name is Lori. So I used the pun on her name with "lorry/truck" and "truck", meaning "to have interaction with". The title is a twist on the title of a Bob Dylan song.

epiphany65 said:

Thanks for the kind review. I wrote the poem about my girlfriend, whose name is Lori. So I used the pun on her name with "lorry/truck" and "truck", meaning "to have interaction with". The title is a twist on the title of a Bob Dylan song.

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I read and liked your poem, good BD reference, and wondered about 'truck' too. I don't think you use 'truck' right. As far as I know it means a nonsensical or negative interaction, basically truck = bullshit. Your poem would of worked for me if you just ended on "Yes" after you ask the question. Even if you said, "I want to truck/with this Lorry" I don't think it would of made any sense because you don't really refer to the name 'Lori' or driving trucks, it seems more like you're talking about telephone conversations.



Edit: I should of posted this in the To Keep the Review Thread Clean thread. Uh oh.

Epmd607 said:

I read and liked your poem, good BD reference, and wondered about 'truck' too. I don't think you use 'truck' right. As far as I know it means a nonsensical or negative interaction, basically truck = bullshit. Your poem would of worked for me if you just ended on "Yes" after you ask the question. Even if you said, "I want to truck/with this Lorry" I don't think it would of made any sense because you don't really refer to the name 'Lori' or driving trucks, it seems more like you're talking about telephone conversations.



Edit: I should of posted this in the To Keep the Review Thread Clean thread. Uh oh.

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A couple of definitions of truck are- give in exchange or have dealings with. Both seem to work?

Thursday (Wed, Tue) poetry reccomendations

There are several new poems for Thursday (and Wed and Tue). The two most reading today are
Maelstrom by politicaltoes starts out with seashore imagery and develops into a more intimate and sensual expression.
The Game Remains the Same by LONEWOLF_ explores the feelings of lost first love and wondering what, if anything, could have been different, something I still go through. It think it could use a little word work.

Lone Sailor by boxlicker101 is a Wednesday winner, a focused illustrated poem.
HRKW has several poems, I liked the ending of Thoughts of a College Student...
rubyslipper nicely touches on writer's block in Block.
UnderYourSpell offers some more pleasant whimsy with I've seen a housefly and Consider the Brachiosaurus
My neighbor (could be 50 miles away) jayce1066 offers a local image in South on 288

On Tuesday UnderYourSpell gives us I dreamt of home about change in our backyard.
bluerains has swells, with compact, connected imagery.

Several other poems, mostly lust or lost love, which you might enjoy.

Saturday

Um. Yeah, so there are four new poems.

Sunday August 2nd

Wow I had typed a 2 hour review then accidentally hit the back button and poof it is all gone. So I'll reprise and please pardon my brevity. There were 19 poems today so much to choose from.

I was arrested by Leash but even more taken with Clean up on Aisle 7, both by DeepGreenEyes. Tristesse and UnderYourSpell both have survivor poems in for Sunday. Of UYS's, I most enjoyed The Wall for it's strong entry. She really grabbed me with

"Mine is a hunger of a thousand years
such a yearning that pulses and waits
in the silent gatherings of strength
until I'm ready to lay my pretty baits."

Tristesse's Fortuna was an engaging narrative though I wanted to know what truths! So greedy a reader am I. Otherwise there are many interesting poems for fans of knives and heavy alliteration. Lots to peruse. Enjoy!

Monday, August 03, 2009

There are fourteen new poems today. There are several good reads today, but I only have time to mention a few.

CoyoteWalkingTr gets bonus points for using "Phantasmagorical" as the doube tactyl word in Improvised. Goodbye, Old Friend is a humorous ghazal with some technical flaws. I would suggest that CoyoteWalkingTr reads each couplet separately to determine if they can stand alone. I think the third and last couplets need a little refining to be independent.


Hmmnmm has two new poems today. I enjoyed sport the most. The other is so on. I love hmmnmmish's skilled phrase churning.

I liked She Opened by UYS, but I feel it needs some tweaking. The second half reads as though the honeyed juices are moaning softly, eager, and unfolding. Perhaps she meant that, but some of it is a little awkward especially with the missing commas. It's an interesting read.

The Matter of Lazarus Raised is an excellent piece by greenmountaineer. I may not agree with the message, but I love a good poem.

Oblivious Love (Ode to Medusa) and Moon Child by LadyShadowcross are both interesting reads, but I would suggest trimming and editing Moon Child.

So, help yourself to some poetry today. Don't forget to comment with suggestions or shameless praise.

Tuesday Muse Day

LadynStFreknBed said:

new poems

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PavelPasha is first up from the bottom on 8/4. I like certain lines from their poem "Come Celebrate" especially the intro:

the calamus grows in out-of-the-way places
in army bases and swampy spaces
allow some abandonment and expression

But I'd say this poem is probably better as slam/spoken word/performance, it's not really that interesting as a textual performance. PavelPasha, I hope you keep writing and submitting here.

Greenmountaineer wrote a poem yesterday or the day before that I thought about for a while. Having to do with Lazarus and his pre-rising relationship to Jesus. It's one of the most interesting stories for me in the New Testy, they keep it sort of ambiguous, but make it clear Lazarus and Jesus knew each other from way back and were super close buds. Go read that poem and comment maybe.

CoyoteWalking has written a bunch of poems the last week, the newest "Reverence" is probably the most interesting so far, though I think it falls into the 'probably better as performance poetry' like PavelPasha. Coyote also references a William C Williams poem, "Asphodel" that I recommend reading.

DeepGreenEyes has a poem worth reading thru once. Maybe I just want to say I don't like the band Vampire Weekend(which has nothing to do with the poem.)

SweetNpassion, having left us months ago none to happy, has returned with "The END", which is more of a frustrating note to self than a poem. It's worth a read if you're altruistic, the first line basically says 'this is my cry for help!'. Read this: I'm not making fun or light of the situation, just reviewing poems for Tuesday Museday.

LadyShadowcross has also been posting often the last week or two. I'd say good sensual storytelling, as poems they sort of fall flat for me. I bet you can turn some of your poems into nice little erotic stories, cuz it looks like you have prose down.

LilyGurl wrote a poem, "Ode to the Music Lover..." with the name of just about every contemporary band that I don't like. It's interesting as novelty.

Of the few ArielsGoddess poems posted I recommend "Pieces of My Soul".

Todays poems didn't really make me want to jump on my bed. I recommend reading Pandora's 007 thread if you haven't already. It has a bunch of new poems.

Thursday poetry recommendations

There are a handful of new poems today.

Today's top poem, beyond any shadow of doubt, is A sleep I shall have by UnderYourSpell.
It is an excellent glossa, I highly recommend you read it.
UnderYourSpell gives a bit of an introduction. I found even more value after a little bit of Wikipedia checking on the subject.
You must read this, if no others from today!

You may enjoy some of the other poems as well. Bluerains gives us indifferent, which is rather terse, but has impact. Curiouswife seems to be back recounting more disappointments. The others are all erotic (South Side appears to be mis-classified) poems with a variety of styles and subjects. Some nice, none struck me as outstanding.

For Wednesday SapposSister has a nice little poem with Third Date Dilemma. There are quite a few others - check them out if you have time.

Again, I can't stop recommending 'A sleep I shall have', from today.

Friday, August 7th

No New Poems! Probably a lot for Saturday coming up.

Monday, August 10, 2009

There are 12 new poems today.

We have an interesting roundelay from UYS called Battle of Britain. It needs a little work with punctuation and the 3rd line in the last stanza is a little awkward, but I like it.

Rural Route Hero by hmmnmm has an interesting rhythm. I wasn't sure if I liked the rhythm at first, but it sems to fit the subject somehow.

I want to know by SweetOblivion is a dom/sub erotic poem. Now, many domsub poems seem incredibly shallow, but this one does seem to have a deeper sensitivity to it, though I think the poem could have explored this sentiment to greater depth.

Venus by tungtied2u is a good read with rich description.

My connection says that's all the time I have right now. Hpefully, I can get this to post. Feel free to add any thoughts on ones that I couldn't get to.

Tuesday Museday

new poems

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There are eight new poems today, I'm not really feeling any of them.

I recommend reading "Teach Me to Dance" from 8/8 by SapphosSister

and

"Cherryblossom, Mine" another poem from 8/8 by VroseJ10

8/9 we have "slowburn" from hmmnmm that I like and some susansnow poems. I'm not sure how I feel about her yet, have to read more.

Two poems really stand out today.

Carma by Illustr8rr is a hilarious take on road rage. Do not read this with a full bladder.

The other (Mother's Loose Caboose Goose by numbsain) is actually a string of poems with the linking theme of nursery rhymes. It is painfully funny. If you only read one poem this week, make it this one. Thank me later.

Marlboro Man Blues

I thought Marlboro really rocked. It's this poet's first poetry post at Literotica. Check it out and see what you think.

Another new poem today is On World War II, an Afterthought which is a small concrete poem. I think Corso had 'The Happy Birthday of Death', but I'm remembering from long ago.

Someone will need to cover next Thursday, Aug 20.

I expect to be able to do the following week, Aug 27.

Friday August 14 New Poems Recommendations

There are 29 new poems for Friday. Although simplyme's images are very expected, I thought the use of repetition in I Need showed promise. Sappho's Sister has a lovely little poem in Falling. Also, UnderYourSpell has a triolet called Awake that is well worth checking out. Steve Porter has a sexy tribute in beneath the rose though I generally avoid putting the word "soul" in a poem unless it's satiric. There were a LOT of poems that used "soul" today. At least 10.

You broke my toe by whisperingsubmission makes me concerned for the poet, but it's got an interesting idea at center, or interesting to me. I get a little confused because it is all written in the present tense though it happens over the time of a healed toe. I am interested in the subject matter and the simplicity of the storytelling. I think there's something there that could be made to shine with an edit or two. I also enjoyed this poet's poem Lightening. There were many other poems I didn't mention because they didn't grab me, but they might grab you, so go browse if you have a few minutes.

Monday, August 17, 2009

There are 17 new poems today including several excellent pieces!


Omega by Manny_Kanblo is a dance of prose and poetry. It's an intriguing blend of the two, and I usually HATE prose poetry.

Starry Night by new poet, masterandslave18 is perhaps one that I would have overlooked, but I had just been listening to some music which seemed to flow with these words.

Of the poems by simplyme, I prefer Drift. It's a tender, sad tale of the end of a relationship you can't really regret, because it got you to where you are. I really like Blank Pages, but the message is so overdone in poems that I think it's become cliche. Ink isn't bad, it's just extremely melodramatic without any foundation.

Irania gives us two interesting pieces. A Mystery in rhyming couplet form (again, something I am not usually fond of) describes a battle of faith, artistic drive, and redemption. And then we have sunday's mountain which is a senryu with a serious tone.

ridden by bluerains is an interesting read. I assume it is a POV piece for the poetry survivor contest, but it definitely has a strong metaphoric quality.

I'm not into erotic poetry lately, but for those who are, Gorgeous Girl by Taunus is a good read.

ETA:

Somehow, I forgot to mention SweetOblivion's poem, One Day. It was actually my favorite from today's poems, but somehow I forgot to mention it. my bad! It's an excellent read, folks.


Am I just being too tolerant today or were there several good poems posted? You be the judge.

Tuesday Muse-ish Day

new poems

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14 Newish Poems Today

Pushkine brings me an "Agnostic Hymn" for review:

I'm not religious. Prayer does not
Come readily to me, through thoughts
That play out mechanistically.
Should God be merciful to me?


All killer except for the second line of the second stanza, it seems too abrupt. His tenth line of his second poem of the day "At the Palazzo" also seems too choppy.

The word "dungeon" doesn't work for me in any new poem.

Tokuqin wrote:

Then we made love again
on the huge sailing bed
In our present form.

The word "fjord" doesn't work for me in any classic or contemporary poem.

mdbrownie wrote a block of text that I couldn't read. Maybe mdbrownie will be into our idea of writing a short story with poetic elements.

Vrosej10 "Haiku #2" is what I like to read on Tuesday Museday.

SandyB's been writing a bunch of form-ish poems, from what I can tell Sandy knows some things about poetry, but I shy away from liking Sandy's poems because he/she chooses 19th century pop poet words like omnipotence, ebbing, ravishes... The voice you choose to write in should resemble a modern voice as far as I'm concerned. You can write in strict form and still sound freshly fresh. SapphosSister seems to hit it just right on some of her uber-forms.

Taunus wrote a sloppy poem yesterday, I wanna undo the recommendation by quoting:

My rough tongue blade was anything but light
Resistance futile is for such as her

Friday New Poems Recommendations

Sorry this was so late. So on the 21st there were 23 New Poems and of these I enjoyed several, including the prose poem How Sisyphus Invented Tit-Fucking by theryk (the title alone is worth the read, but there is some interesting narrative, there). I wouldn't necessarily call lots of what I read today poetry, but Red Square by RebekkaBrown was quite erotic, perhaps explained by my penchant for vodka. See if you think the same. I say it isn't a poem because it doesn't really use poetic devices mindfully. It might make you squirmy though and it's a fine story.

There are three poems by simplyme today. I would love to see these workshopped because I see potential here, but feel that the poet needs to replace abstraction with concrete images. Free basing words is interesting but I want to see more clearly what (s)he means there with the extension of the metaphor, perhaps. I can read this and it sounds good to the ear:

"That transports you to the edge of the divine
Where the hazy shades of forever"

but I can't see it. Is the edge purple? Hazy I get, but shades of forever? I dunno. I want to sense this better and to feel the aboutness of it more. Still, this poet has something going on and I enjoy reading to see further development of his/her craft. Similarly, I got into one of HRKW's offerings Weighty Words. It poses an interesting central question (if words were physical embodiments of what they represented, what would they be like?) and it was a brave attempt to bridge abstract to concrete.

Otherwise there were some very personal diary-entry types of poems and narratives. See if any appeal to you and if I missed anything.

Tuesday Ruse Day

From the top down, try to hit some from other days too.

Illug8ter has a satire, "Jerk" that is too plain. The poem above it is probably supposed to be satire too, but it's wholly uninteresting.

vrosej10 has a shorty poem "Rain#2" that was too brief to give me some sort of image or feeling. I recommend her other Haiku#3, but I really liked a poem from a week ago+ that she wrote and I recommend finding and reading that one again.

Lady Lazarus "Seeks a similar" is worth reading.

My own poem is recycled from an earlier group of poems, it doesn't quite sit right with me now that a few days have passed since I re-wrote it.

I recommend Manny Kanblow poems, they don't make me want to jump on my bed but they are written with some knowledge of contemporary style.

Lawrobbur wrote a poem "Explicit" attempting dialogue with whoever's reading her poems. The thing is, your poems aren't any more explicit than the stuff coming out of the mouths of fifth and sixth graders. Saying 'lick my pussy and eat my ass' isn't dangerous or provoking in any way, a twelve year old boy can come up with more original poetry about cocks and such. RamonaThompson wrote more provoking poems on this website, so your last stanza is quite off the mark.

I liked hmmnmm's "Spending Spree" probably more than any of the other poems I've read so far today.

Again, I recommend checking out SusanSnow and SandyB.

Thursday

There are several new poems today.

I really didn't find much that struck my fancy either today or yesterday.
Quite a few recountings of erotic couplings if that's your fancy (Doggy got 4 100%, don't think any others got any comments) and a few sad or prosy things.
If nothing hit you either, there's always tomorrow.

Friday, August 28, 2009

Sorry this wasn't posted last night; I blame rock and roll. There were only 11 New Poems on Friday. Of these, I recommend only to selected audiences. To Americans who put patriotic sentiment above all else, I would recommend HRKW's Half Mast. For those with leather fetishes, I would recommend Leather Couch by miss_trust for a thoroughly upholstered experience. To the lottery dreamers, I recommend Escape by CuriousWife. For those who think Literotica is for porn so quit being so uptight already, I recommend lawrobbur's smirky smackdown everyone's a critic, lol. Unfortunately, I cannot recommend any of today's offerings purely on the basis of their craft.

Quite a few new poems today.
My favorite is Pushkine's Sonnet of Italianate Perversity
Some others worth reading, but my headache's leaving me somewhat spiritless

Friday September 4th Recommendations

Of the 14 new poems Friday, I would recommend Pushkine's And, Like Any Doomed Quest because it is evocative and controversial, at least to this reader. I also enjoyed the increasing jeopardy of Pushkine's other offering, today, Domestic Prayer. I couldn't get into the other poems offered today, though many were probably emotionally engaging for another reader. Give them a read and see for yourself.

Today, we have a small selection of 5 new poems. None of them really grabbed my attention, but I think two are at least worth mentioning.

The Kiss by DawnJ is not a bad little erotic poem.

Wishing is my favorite poem of the four new poems today by FizzledSub

Since there are only 5 new poems and most of them are short, why not give them all a read?