The Author's Hangout Vending Machine

glynndah said:

And you get a doctorate from the University of Phoenix Online.

I put in a poinsettia with all the blossoms chewed off.

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The_Darkness said:

You get a sick cat.

I put in a bag of broken Christmas lights.

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sweetsubsarahh said:

And you get a pair of underwear with mistletoe embroidered over the crotch that says - "Kiss me beneath the mistletoe."


I put in all my old concert T-shirts.

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sweetsubsarahh said:

And you get a pair of underwear with mistletoe embroidered over the crotch that says - "Kiss me beneath the mistletoe."


I put in all my old concert T-shirts.

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glynndah said:

And you get front row tickets.

I put in rolls of Christmas paper with just a smidgen left on them.

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TE999 said:

And you get back a huge ball of used Xmas ribbon.

I put in a CD of 'Alvin and the Chipmunks Greatest Hits'.

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sweetsubsarahh said:

And you get (rightfully) an electric shock.

I put in 3 sets of completely tangled and unuseable outside Christmas lights.

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TE999 said:

And you get back a Santa Claus blow-up lawn ornament ineptly repaired with duct tape.

I put in a slightly tarnished Angel tree topper.

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sweetsubsarahh said:

And get back a glow-in-the-dark grinning devil for your mantle.


I put in my husband's car which has decided not to start today.

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TE999 said:

And you get back a handful of public transit tokens.


I put in a vintage Vespa motor scooter.

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sweetsubsarahh said:

And you get a Harley, complete with a leather-clad rider.


I put in my sink full of dirty dishes.

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TE999 said:

And you get back a St. Bernard that will gladly lick them clean.

I put in a book of half finished crossword puzzles.

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sweetsubsarahh said:

And you get out the latest Sudoku puzzle book.

I toss in the old cat toys.

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TE999 said:

And the old cat hides them behind the sofa.

I toss in the hideous polo shirt I received for Christmas.

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sweetsubsarahh said:

And you get a Santa reindeer tie that lights up and plays Jingle Bell Rock.

I toss in the sheet music to I want a Hippopotamus for Christmas.

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TE999 said:

And you get back an Elvis figurine that sings 'Blue Christmas'.

I toss in a dozen M&M/chocolate chip cookies.

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sweetsubsarahh said:

And you get the empty wrapper from the cookies. (Yum!)


I toss in my old workout tennis shoes.

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glynndah said:

I put in my last unopened gift.

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Weird Harold said:

You get back shredded wrapping paper and a thank-you note.

I put in a cough drop covered in lint I found in the bottom of my pocket.

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Weird Harold said:

You get back shredded wrapping paper and a thank-you note.

I put in a cough drop covered in lint I found in the bottom of my pocket.

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glynndah said:

And you get a lint roller and the dregs from a Listerine bottle.

I put in an basket of towels ready to be folded.

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TE999 said:

And you get back four pair of mismatched socks.

I put in a box of used dryer sheets.

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glynndah said:

And you get socks stuck to your underwear.

I put in a box of chocolate covered Oreos.

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TE999 said:

And you get back a quart of sweet, fresh milk.

I put in a plate of pecan brownies.

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