I've recently become interested in BDSM but I'm not really sure if its something i would like trying, its really interesting to me but I'm just really confused, I'm a lesbian and I'm a virgin, I know BDSM isn't all bout sex but I feel like I should mention it, its not a lot to go on, I'm just looking for advise from someone who understands what its like to be confused about this. If you have any questions I'd be happy to answer them.
I think I might be interested
- Thread starter Madness44
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Collar_N_Cuffs
Clink Kink
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2014
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- 15,042
Go to the BDSM library, which you can find here:
BDSM Library
Read through the topics and see which ones interest you. Come back to this thread and ask specific questions if you have them. Don't rush into any activities. One of the things you will read over and over is that you should have an excellent foundation of trust with anyone you engage in BDSM with, or sex in general, for that matter. Fantasy and interest are not the same as reality. Once you have satisfied your interest a little more you can start thinking about experimenting.
Welcome to Lit, enjoy
BDSM Library
Read through the topics and see which ones interest you. Come back to this thread and ask specific questions if you have them. Don't rush into any activities. One of the things you will read over and over is that you should have an excellent foundation of trust with anyone you engage in BDSM with, or sex in general, for that matter. Fantasy and interest are not the same as reality. Once you have satisfied your interest a little more you can start thinking about experimenting.
Welcome to Lit, enjoy
Primalex
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Jul 14, 2007
- Posts
- 6,089
Relinquishing control when you are insecure or confused is rather common. You just feel better and more relaxed when there is someone you can rely on and are not responsible for anyting. Whether this is the first flight ever or first play doesn't really matter much.
Not many people start their journey with a clear vision of who they are and what they want - and these days options are legion. This is okay.
My suggestion is to just get to know new people. Find someone you like, you feel you can trust with your inner emotions and let nature happen. And then, when you are much less confused about yourself, then start to seek to get what you desire.
Not many people start their journey with a clear vision of who they are and what they want - and these days options are legion. This is okay.
My suggestion is to just get to know new people. Find someone you like, you feel you can trust with your inner emotions and let nature happen. And then, when you are much less confused about yourself, then start to seek to get what you desire.
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Good advice. Do some reading and maybe follow some threads here and ask some questions. Those above have touched on some good points. Many people, because of the common view put forth in mainstream movies and TV, think BDSM is all about the "SM" part of it. They think it's all about whips and chains and that's far from the truth. Each person, each couple, each group of people, are different in what excited, arouses, and satisfies them so the first thing is trying to understand yourself, then try to understand others, and then try to find those with whom you are compatible. In that way, it's pretty much the same as finding someone to share yourself and your life with as in the vanilla world.
