John Doe
Justified Snob
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Am I The Cheater?
- Thread starter emma_the_librarian
- Start date
I've always been shyly intimidated by my peers of the female sex...
...that, by itself, vastly limited the number of sexual unions I participated in when I was younger, and eliminated your "conquest" fabrication altogether.
Unlike others who get off by women submitting to them to beat and bruise them, or get off by women submitting to them by referring to them as Daddy...
...I can only really get off with a woman when I understand that the love she holds for me meshes naturally with the love I have for her. And, as I've matured, I've come to appreciate that truth about myself so much that that dictum entirely lords over my sex life now - which also completely voids your "conquest" fabrication.
Too, excluding abalone, I've never had a taste for any other shellfish, let alone ever suffered from a STD...
...and seeing that I've been celibate since April almost 14 years ago now, and was joyfully in a monogamous relationship with the love of my adult life for more than ten years prior to that, I doubt I've contracted any since then.
But, you keep on fabricating, son...
...one can only work within the limits one has.
Debbie
Persnickety slattern
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For some people the emotional baggage is hard to leave at the door because they were badly treated and what they went through was harsh. I can understand that to a point.
But if it leeches into the new relationship it can become a huge deal and a problem for the new relationship.
Maybe so.
I have a friend who mainly dates married guys. It's great at the beginning and then goes down hill from there.
"He doesn't call. He's always making excuses. He stood me up. Maybe I'm too fat. Maybe it's my hair colour." I feel sad and mad at the same time.
Another friend reckons her affair was the best thing that happened to her marriage. Her husband found out, they argued and had make up sex. It brought them closer together. For them part of their problem was they weren't being honest with each other. Neither of them were happy but they didn't talk to each other. They swing now and with honesty. ground rules and communication they seem very happy.
Relationships aren't always easy but if you don't communicate with each other at all then the relationship is possibly doomed.
Laurel
Kitty Mama
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StrangeLife
Eater of beef
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StrangeLife,
I am a sexual being. I'm a monogamous, loved up married woman. I love role playing with the Mr, writing erotica and incorporating that and hi jinks into our marriage and relationship to keep it sexy and lively.
Being monogamous and married is not always a death sentence to rolls in the hay.
The man and I have an agreement. If things aren't working and we need to go our own way then that's what we do. No cheating.
Sometimes I think some people make cheating sound exciting and risque. Is it really? Or is that just at the beginning? What about the feelings of guilt? Fear of getting caught? Meeting where no one will see you together and tell the spouse.
Is it just about the sex? No commitments. No expectations other than just a screw?
I'm not condoning the lifestyle Debbie. If I was, I wouldn't be married. But I understand why some people in otherwise functioning relationships do it.
In a way it has more to do with World of Warcraft than sex. It's a break from "being you". A break from your life. Even when the kids are bad you still love them and you love hubby too - you want to grow old with him - but when you get together with Rodgrigo in your secret hotel once a month for a few hours of pasion you get to "be" somebody else for a short time. A femme fatale. A seductress grabbing a fleeting moment of intimacy with a handsome stranger.
Rodrigo hasn't seen you when you're down with the flu - he hasn't experienced you in the rage of PMS. He doesn't know you like hubby does. He only knows the part of you that you're showing him... the role you want to play with him.
"Can't you be do that by roleplaying with your spouse?"
Well, some can. But your wife knows a lot about you. She knows that you're just a junior insurance salesman from Biloxi and the nice car you're driving is provided for you by the company. She also knows that you haven't travelled Europe and worked for the CIA in the Middle East.
It can be tough to play International Man of Mystery with your wife - especially if she's a bad actress and can't help giggling at the wrong time. Your mistress however doesn't know a lot about you. It's easier for her to suspend disbelief and give you what you crave. With her you can "be" James Bond for a few hours.
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Debbie
Persnickety slattern
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I didn't mean to come across as if I was being snitchy at you.
I can understand the possibility that for some cheating is just sex. That for a time they forget the problems at home or escape into this short interlude of sex, no responsibility etc.
I am quite a realistic, logical person. I think things through and while I am passionate I am cautious and not a spur of the moment person. I guess I just don't get it or have any inclination to see a sexy man and ravish him. Apart from the red head indoors.
I have no problem whatsoever if hubby looks or flirts with the pretties but I know for a fact this shy gal has claws if they were to try and poach him.
parodyluvr75
Owl of Minerva
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I know they all taste the same (pure sugar) but I like blue and purple ones best.
Debbie
Persnickety slattern
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Last year I found a shop that had them here. It's the first time I've seen them in New Zealand. I purchased one and took a bite. I politely spat it into my hand. It must have been old because it was not nice at all.
parodyluvr75
Owl of Minerva
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I think it's an acquired taste, I had them once a year from childhood. As an adult if I never had them before, I probably wouldn't like them.
They shouldn't be too tough, that means they're old. They lose flavor and become less tender.
Fresh when you put them in your mouth, you get a dry slightly rough feeling and sugar burst and then it melts into the marshmallowy goodness as you chew. If you have the chick, you must bit their butt first. If you get a rabbit, you must eat their ears first. They way you eat a peep is as important as the peep.
parodyluvr75
Owl of Minerva
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parodyluvr75
Owl of Minerva
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parodyluvr75
Owl of Minerva
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It was a bit crunchy and grainy.
Too bad your first experience with peeps was older ones. We need to airmail you some fresh ones immediately.
StrangeLife
Eater of beef
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I am quite a realistic, logical person. I think things through and while I am passionate I am cautious and not a spur of the moment person. I guess I just don't get it or have any inclination to see a sexy man and ravish him. Apart from the red head indoors.
Well, finding a good spouse is a lot like buying a car.
Your first car is usually a piece of shit your dad buys for a few thousands at your 16th birthday. Your second car however, is that Camaro you always wanted...
Debbie
Persnickety slattern
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By bird?
It takes a wee while just for stuff to get here from America. I got an email yesterday that a book I want will be here on May 13 th.
http://img1.etsystatic.com/023/0/6610370/il_340x270.522392317_oi7i.jpg
Well, finding a good spouse is a lot like buying a car.
Your first car is usually a piece of shit your dad buys for a few thousands at your 16th birthday. Your second car however, is that Camaro you always wanted...
Interesting analogy. I was too young the first time and picked a bad apple.
This is my dream car.
http://www.onlytoptens.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/top-ten-famous-film-cars-bumblebee.jpg
Queersetti
Bastardo Suave
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John Doe
Justified Snob
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Ooh, science!
I don't like the mouthfeel of Peeps though. Abrasive and irritating on the outside and soft and squishy all throughout. It's like eating fiber-glass insulation. And too sugary (the candy, not the insulation).
Devil'sChild
I have what you want
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If you are a facilitator in the cheating you are a co conspirator. Thus. Guilty of cheating.
