PM asshattery

I feel like when we're talking sex most people want to feel young & gorgeous in their fantasies - it would be like me saying to them 'I want to lift your beer gut & lick your slightly saggy balls!'

:D :D Too funny! :D :D

At first glance, there is potential for this as a reply to an asshat PM.
But the risk of the sarcasm being missed entirely, and the potential that such a reply could be encouraging makes this a poor response.

But it is a great contribution to the thread, gave some laughs, and looks like some folks are wiping their screeens and keyboards.

Thanks for laugh! :D
 
Excellent - I'm glad I could bring a little laughter to a Monday!

I shall defintely not be using that line - I could already name some people who would take that as a chat up line!
 
Being new, I must say this thread has been an educational experience for me. Thanks to all who posted here.
 
Am I the only straight woman who gets asshat PM's from bi and bi-curious women? Most of them are as sleazy as the sleazy ones that come from men.

Guys and gals, have some class. Don't troll around and approach people unless you know they're open and receptive to these kinds of messages.
 
giggles

You girls have made me laugh on a boring Wednesday morning. What a great thread this is :)
 
I feel like when we're talking sex most people want to feel young & gorgeous in their fantasies - it would be like me saying to them 'I want to lift your beer gut & lick your slightly saggy balls!'

Okay, here we go: The title of the Post was called "RP Skillz Like A Bawss"

alexcan'tRP: Walked behind her as he admired her up and down, slowly squeezing the side of her ass as he walked beside her I haven't seen anyone even close to as beautiful as you. What's your name? he asked her, standing near a rather crowded shopping center store front

Missus Random(me): She turned around swiftly and stabbed him in the eye with a sharpened pencil. His eyeball exploded wetly, and blood and thicker things ran down his face. As his body crumpled to the ground in agony, she spit on him, then gave him a vicious kick in the ribs. Bones crunched under her boot. "That's what you get for sexually assaulting me, asshole. Now when you get out of the hospital, consider treating the next woman you speak to like a human being, instead of being a misogynistic pig."

Missus Random(me): I hope you enjoyed our RP as much as I did.
Absolutely hysterical. :D

I recently received a couple of PMs from two different guys (which I unfortunately didn't save as I didn't find this thread until just now) baldly stating in one sentence that they'd like to roleplay having me suck them. I just ignored them.
 
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I feel so special

I got:

xyz asshat said:
Do you enjoy watching a man masturbate on his webcam?
for the 3rd time now.

No sir, actually I only enjoy watching a man masturbate on his grandmother's webcam, using her false teeth that he swiped out of the glass to nibble his buttocks, while balancing on a unicycle and simultaneously armpit-farting the Star Spangled Banner.

Are you man enough?

Oh and your zipper is down.
 
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I got:


for the 3rd time now.

No sir, actually I only enjoy watching a man masturbate on his grandmother's webcam, using her false teeth that he swiped out of the glass to nibble his buttocks, while balancing on a unicycle and simultaneously armpit farting the Star Spangled Banner.

Are you man enough?

Oh and your zipper is down.

AHAHAHAHAHAHA "nibble his buttocks"

That is some funny shit!!
 
Hey babe wanna fool around?

I'd love to fool around! With my block and delete buttons.
 
No sir, actually I only enjoy watching a man masturbate on his grandmother's webcam, using her false teeth that he swiped out of the glass to nibble his buttocks, while balancing on a unicycle and simultaneously armpit-farting the Star Spangled Banner.
That's so fucking hot.
 
Asshat: You into phone sex?

Me: Sure. Give me a call. 313-XXX-XXXX (gives number to local police department)

(Five minutes later)

Asshat: Hey! That wasn't you!

:D
 
This thread is heartless. If you get a PM you're supposed to say thankyou, especially if the person took the time to include a naked picture or something.
 
This thread is heartless. If you get a PM you're supposed to say thankyou, especially if the person took the time to include a naked picture or something.
You're joking, right? I don't want to unleash the snark on you if you're joking.
 
123josh quoth:
this thread is heartless. if you get a PM you're supposed to say thankyou, especially if the person took the time to include a naked picture or something.
i can't tell if you're joking either. i sincerely hope so. if not, the ambassador for nigeria has a very lucrative opportunity for you.

ed
 
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