New mom/son story just posted. Looking for feedback.

Three Days of Peace and Incest.

It's only one Lit page long.

I'm also looking to find an editor for a few other stories I have written but not yet posted.

Nice story, well written. You are right, you do need an editor for fine tuning. I like the way you added the 'local color' of the concert. It could have been done a bit slicker, more detail.

You come close to making your characters people, but don't quite succeed.

The transition to grabbing mom's tits was too sudden. What is his motivation. Sure he was on acid, but still. . . after all those years. maybe a little lead in at the beginning.

Personally I cannot imagine being sexually attracted to my mother or my daughter, it just doesn't work for me, but a story is a story.

I might be available to edit pieces if they are not too long, PM me.

robertreams said:

Nice story, well written. You are right, you do need an editor for fine tuning. I like the way you added the 'local color' of the concert. It could have been done a bit slicker, more detail.

You come close to making your characters people, but don't quite succeed.

Click to expand...

I've been told that before, that my characters seem "Faceless". I'm working on it.

The transition to grabbing mom's tits was too sudden. What is his motivation. Sure he was on acid, but still. . . after all those years. maybe a little lead in at the beginning.

Personally I cannot imagine being sexually attracted to my mother or my daughter, it just doesn't work for me, but a story is a story.

I might be available to edit pieces if they are not too long, PM me.

Click to expand...

I know the sex happened rather abruptly, but I was trying to keep the story short. Maybe too short.

Thanks for your comments and your time.

I suggested you read lovecraft68's Write Incest like a Mother Fucker. My main complaint with the story is that it doesn't seem to be a big deal that he is having sex with his mom. From his reaction, it might have been the middle-aged woman next door. I don't know anything about LSD, but I doubt that it would make the mom strip half-naked and not resist her son's advances. The mom smashed through all these taboos and we don't have any idea why.